Happier Abroad Forum Community

Hello all. My name is Carl I'm a 29 year old caucasian man from West Virginia, USA. I have worked in or around coal mines my entire life and I have always felt disconnected from the area, and people. I have dated different girls off and on never meeting the "right" girl. Where I am from all of the women describe themselves as country girls looking for their country boy. I describe myself as a liberal who likes to read and travel so it never seems to work out.

I was starting to wonder if it was impossible to meet a woman in her 20's that didn't already have kids that I could start a family with. I have always heard about internet relationships and guys that meet their wives in other countries so one day I started to research it online and I found this site with stories about why I would be happier abroad.

I have now been staying in the Philippines for 23 days with a girl I met on Cebuanas almost a year ago through a link I found on this website. So far things are going great! She came to meet me at the airport in Manila and I am staying with her in her families home in Panabo City not far from Davao. She has a lot of family that work overseas already that help her family members still in the Philippines with college tuition and applying for VISA's to work in other countries. Family seems to always come first here because family is all they can depend on. They always try to help each other even when it is difficult at times. Most want to work overseas to make money to buy land, or buy a home here in the Philippines for when they get older.

I will post a trip report later when I return home to the United States. I still have about 35 days left here before heading home as I just had my passport stamped in Davao. I will post a few pictures with my trip report.

A few observations I had during my week in Manila.

-People really do point with their lips here. I have seen both men and women do it, even on television. It is something different.

-Poverty is widespread. I have had people come up begging for money while in a taxi on the street, and in front of a starbucks in Makati. My filipina takes care of it usually. I think it is actually worse around Manila than in Panabo/Davao even though people here look just as poor.

-The driving is as bad as everyone says it is. My fiances neighbor told me I can use his car if I want to go somewhere but I will not take him up on his offer because traffic laws here are really more like suggestions. Pulling out in front of each other, cutting each other off, passing in the other lane while there is oncoming traffic. It is all true.

-Taxi drivers like to make extra money. Sometimes you can get a price before going and they wont use the meter, sometimes they will use the meter but ask for extra when you arrive because of "traffic". They go by the meter about 35% of the time I think. My fiance does all the talking.

-Girls are everywhere looking for single white men. I get asked if I am single at a juice stand in the market, in the mall, in the grocery store. I even had a girl ask me if I was single when I was standing with my fiance waiting to catch a bus. If I am alone and I tell them I am engaged they then ask if they can meet my fiance which I think is pretty odd.

Dudevondudenstein wrote:A few observations I had during my week in Manila.

-Girls are everywhere looking for single white men. I get asked if I am single at a juice stand in the market, in the mall, in the grocery store. I even had a girl ask me if I was single when I was standing with my fiance waiting to catch a bus.

That sounds great! Girls sound like they are friendly and will actually start conversations with men! This is something that never happens in America.

I am glad you found a girl that you really like. The chances of meeting a quality woman in the USA is the same chance you have of being struck by lightening!

Welcome Dudevondudenstein. Great observations. Is that girl in your avatar the one you dated? She looks very pretty and nice too. Congrats.

Thanks for the welcome. Yeah, she is the one I am staying with now. Things are going well. We are planning to spend 7 days in Cebu next week. We are just waiting for her to finish all of her requirements for her college graduation this week.

So what's next? Are you going to return soon or are you going to get married?

I personally feel you're making a mistake settling for one girl. Local men have many girls on the go. How do you know you won't find a girl you like better? This is the problem with silly, "loyal" guys - you're just dummies who don't look for better girls, while girls in the US are always looking for a better guy - this is called hyperagency.

So guys should sink to the level of US girls and start doing the same things?

the reason they want to meet your fiance is because they want to compare themselves to her. if they think they are prettier than her then they will try to steal you from her.

Congratulations.

polya wrote:So what's next? Are you going to return soon or are you going to get married?

I personally feel you're making a mistake settling for one girl. Local men have many girls on the go. How do you know you won't find a girl you like better? This is the problem with silly, "loyal" guys - you're just dummies who don't look for better girls, while girls in the US are always looking for a better guy - this is called hyperagency.

I wouldn't be so quick to assume that he is making a mistake. She is graduating from college (intelligent and ambitious) and is a decent looking girl, assuming she is the one pictured in the avatar. I realize that many HA posters feel threatened by intelligence and ambition in a woman, but some see those as positive qualities.

Loyalty does not necessarily equate with being easily manipulated. If loyalty is silly then disloyalty must be smart. But only for a male. If a female is disloyal then she would be a slut. Gotta love that HA logic.

Congratulations man!

Welcome to the site too, don't mind the post bashers, they are jus lonely dudes with nothing else to do in their moms' basements lol.

We need more success stories like yours here. Cheers!

Thanks for the replies everyone. If I dated I could have met some other girls, but I doubt they would have had the personality of my fiance. I never wanted to play the field I just wanted to start a family with a good woman.

I'm very happy for you - you've gone overseas and have found love - which is better than most people on here will ever do.... I didn't mean to sound "rude" in my earlier post - I meant that you're only young once and you should aim to meet many girls before even thinking about marriage. Or never marry if you decide not to.

For all we know you could have dated dozens of girls before deciding on your fiance. Anyway, you've only just begun with all the hassles of having a long-term relationship and I hope it works out, but it won't be easy if she comes to your country or vice-versa.

Dudevondudenstein wrote:Thanks for the replies everyone. If I dated I could have met some other girls, but I doubt they would have had the personality of my fiance. I never wanted to play the field I just wanted to start a family with a good woman.

I went to the PI to meet a girl I had been talking to for 9 months it didn't really work out but I did the same thing. She is married now to a european and lives in thailand. There nothing wrong with taking your time to find one online and visiting just her. I wish you the best of luck. But leave Manila asap it horrible. The smaller provincial towns are much nicer and cheaper. Bohol is near Cebu and its less pricey as a tourist destination. It was my girls fav place in PI.

If you have a filipina like you do it will save you a lot of the foreigner tax (up charge in services) as long as she is assertive enough to tell them to f**k off.


I love PI! The restaurant food/service however is another another story.