Happy New Year Everyone!
Just to let you all know, I'm not sure if I should rush back to China again, for several reasons.
1. Chinese women/girls and culture are too workaholic. They work too much and don't have much time for dates or going out. When they do have time though, they prefer to spend it with their other girlfriends or well established friends, not with some new guy like me. So this is an obstacle as well as a cultural difference for me. If you want to meet girls who have lots of time to hang out or date or be with you, SE Asia is better obviously. China feels kind of restrictive and limiting in this regard. Plus I do not agree with the workaholic "live to work" mentality.
2. Chinese girls are too picky. They are easy to talk to and befriend. But not easy to get serious with. They have a list of demands and criteria that only a stable, well-off, tall, thin guy can meet. Many of the "leftover Chinese women" who are closer to my age, are too picky and independent, so they put nothing into a relationship. Yet they want a guy who is tall, handsome and makes good money. I do see ugly guys with hot girls everywhere in China, so obviously a guy doesn't have to be handsome to have a beautiful girlfriend in China. However, he does have to be tall and thin at least, as well as stable. Although I am financially stable, I am not locationally stable and maybe not emotionally stable either. They want a guy who will settle down into a stable routine. They aren't the kind of girls who just wanna have fun. There are "party girls" in China of course, but they never enter my social circle, or they aren't interested in me. (Murphy's Law) Btw, I am not picky at all. I find 80 percent of the girls in Shenzhen to be attractive, so I am definitely not too picky, just perpetually unlucky in love.
3. I still have some Murphy's Law in China in that the girls I love and want dump me or aren't interested. And the one girl that loves me isn't one that I have any desire or feelings for. So the universe doesn't seem to allow me to have the Chinese girls I want, only the ones I don't want. Classic Murphy's Law. I get the feeling that if you want something badly, the universe will make it especially hard for you to get it. It's a basic principle of the universe, as well as Murphy's Law. This happens with most people, not just me. So the lesson is to "not give a shit" and things will come easier I guess. Or perhaps it's just not my destiny to have what I want in love. If you try to get something that's not your destiny, something will always go wrong, in my experience.
Some people just aren't meant to be in a stable relationship, and I may be one of those. Something always goes wrong, even if I find a soulmate I click with, such as Lisa or others I've had before her. Perhaps some people's souls need too much freedom and exploration, so they sabotage every relationship they are in, or the universe sabotages it for them to help them out by making every relationship go wrong, even if it's a soulmate relationship or compatible match. Or perhaps if you are cursed or have bad relationship karma, even if you find your soulmate, some demon will possess her and make her change her mind about you. That seemed to happen with both Summer and Lisa, my first two girlfriends in China. They did a sudden 180 when everything was going great and I did nothing wrong.
So as much as I love Chinese women and girls, and enjoy China and it's culture, I'm having second thoughts about it. So instead of rushing back to China after I return to Asia, my plans are:
1) To go to Philippines first and have some carefree fun again with girls and bars, which I didn't have in China. And to visit my son too of course.
2) Then to head over to Thailand to finally visit it and see what it's like. I've been meaning to go there for years. Many people, including Rock and Mr S, said that Thailand may be a good fit for me and that everything there is better quality than in the Philippines, and that the P4P experience is better there too. Rock will probably go with me there to show me around.
After that, I may go back to China again if I have some good prospects to visit from dating sites.
However, I've also been itching with a burning desire to return to Europe again, which I've been wanting to do since 2006. I miss how alive and energetic I felt when I was in Europe. I have a European soul and a very strong karmic connection with Europe. I feel like I have a long rich history there. (from past lives probably) So I want to go back there to explore that. Even if I can't get a girlfriend there, and only platonic coffee dates with girls, still I am in my element in Europe, because European environments and architecture provide energy I feed off of. You see, I feed off the energy in Europe like Superman feeds off the Sun. So when I am there, I feel like He-Man (when Prince Adam raises his sword and says "By the power of Greyskull" and turns into He-Man, if you remember from the 1980's cartoon show) because I feel alive and strong there since the environment there energizes and rejuvenates me. I miss that so much. I miss how alive and complete I felt when I was in Europe before. Every time I watch documentaries about European history, I feel a burning desire to return to that again and explore my "karmic past or roots" there.
In contrast, the environment in the USA and Taiwan feels soul sucking and draining. I definitely can't feed off the energy tere. Also, the vibe in the US is toxic and radioactive to me, like Kryptonite is to Superman. I don't like it at all. It makes me feel weak, insecure, and out of my element, like a fish out of water. I don't connect with the people, culture, environment or vibe of America or Taiwan at all. And that results in a lonely, isolated, disconnected, empty feeling of powerlessness. I certainly do not like feeling that way at all. I'm sure many of you can relate.
Furthermore, there seems to be this demonic Satanic energy in the US that tries to make you go crazy and suicidal, if you let it get to you that is. That's why even so many Hollywood stars and rock stars go crazy in America and commit suicide all of a sudden. Robert Stanley has done a lot of research on Archons or "mental parasites" that possess people, prey on their weaknesses, feed off them, and make them go crazy. You can listen to his interviews on YouTube about this by searching for "Robert Stanley Archons". He has found a lot of compelling evidence of this. So it would explain why I feel like something is trying to make me go crazy and lose it in America, if I let it take over. That's pretty scary, and is another reason to stay away from America.
Frankly, I don't see how other people can tolerate that feeling of social disconnectedness, loneliness, and toxic vibe in America. You get this constant feeling that "No one cares about you" in America, and that you aren't accepted or good enough. It's a terrible feeling. Why should anyone put up with it? And why do many people assume that you have to stay in America? Hardly anyone even mentions leaving it, including alternative people.
Anyhow, that's my plan for now. So I will try to work Europe into my plans somewhere, since I've been wanting badly to go back there again too. The world is just so big with so many places. It's a pity we can only go to one place at a time.