Ashamed of your own ethnicity/race?

Inter2002 · Post by **Inter2002** » May 4th, 2015, 12:48 pm

I live in the suburbs of North Texas within the Dallas area. I live in the northern part where whites are the majority. As a Hispanic American I remember feeling ashamed of my race ethnicity since the beginning of middle school all the way through high school, that I would lie and say that I'm either Greek, Bulgarian, Italian or any other Southern European nationality. Is there been anyone here who can relate to this? I have had this racial complexity over a period of several years starting either in 4th or 5th grade.

Just 2-3 years after graduating high school I decided it was enough and it was no good to lie, so therefore I started to say that I'm Hispanic American and that my mother is from Mexico, and my dad is from Argentina.

I was reluctant to date any girl during my high school years since the only girls that I was attracted to were white girls. I hate to confess that I went as far as looking up ways to lighten up my skin color, change my eye color through hypnosis, and even dye my hair lighter, planning to have an ethnic nose job, thin my lips, so that way I would look European Hispanic, not have any Amerindian features. I've been shy my whole life, as well as have a low self esteem.

This one time during my senior year I asked this girl who was in my table if she knew a way to lighten up my skin, then a guy said "I don't know, why don't you ask Michael Jackson?", and he went on to say "Aren't you satisfied?".

As of now I don't mind having brown eyes, black hair and tan skin.

chibolo · Post by **chibolo** » May 4th, 2015, 1:11 pm

Wow man that sucks... I must say I don't get why you feel so ashamed of being a mestizo latino. I wouldn't mind having some of that naturally tan skin you guys have myself (I am a pasty white guy

). Maybe you should take a trip to Latin America where you will blend in more and feel less different. I am sure many girls will be curious about a latin guy from the US.

What I also don't understand is why most guys on this forum are so obsessed with dating white women. I have seen lots of mestiza girls who are FAR more attractive than the average white girl.

MarcosZeitola · Post by **MarcosZeitola** » May 4th, 2015, 1:21 pm

Never be ashamed of your race. You are who you are. You cannot change who your parents are, who your ancestors are, what your genes are. There are many things you can change, but these you never will. You cannot fight it, so embrace it.

There's nothing more pathetic then a self-hating [INSERT ANY GIVEN ETHNICITY].

I've never been ashamed of my race. At times I have even been proud of my race. Nowadays, I am just neutral about it. I'm a white man and enjoy being a white man, but had I been an Indian, Black or Latino man I would not have felt any less or better for it. It's just one of those things you have no control over. So why give so much thought to something you have no control over? Focus on the things you can change instead.

Ghost · Post by **Ghost** » May 4th, 2015, 3:45 pm

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zboy1 · Post by **zboy1** » May 5th, 2015, 7:58 am

Asians are notorious self-haters; have any of you been around any Asian American people? It's truly pathetic, sigh...

Even in Asia, it exists. That's the only thing that bothers me about my race/ethnicity is the lack of pride among Asian people around the world. Otherwise, I'm happy being Asian.

Yohan · Post by **Yohan** » May 5th, 2015, 9:34 am

There are always some voices out which are telling you to be ashamed of something.

I don't care. My race, gender, history of my nation before I even was born etc. is not my fault. There is nothing what I can do about it. We cannot choose our parents.

Jester · Post by **Jester** » May 8th, 2015, 8:11 pm

Yohan wrote:
There are always some voices out which are telling you to be ashamed of something.

This is the point.

One kid is embarrassed about his ears. He goes on to be President.

You get the idea.

We have to decide to love ourselves. Period.

Appearance not quite what you would have chosen? Yeah, me neither. Develop a personality. Or a talent.

And be grateful you're a man. If you were a chick, you'd have to f**k around with makeup your whole life.

ladislav · Post by **ladislav** » June 5th, 2021, 9:05 pm

Not ashamed by minding my security if I can. If I am in a friendly country, then I will not even think about it.
If I am in a dangerous, bigoted place, then it's not me who is wrong or bad, but it's those people who are evil. So, not ashamed but I need to keep things confidential in a hostile environment.
Recently, one Muslim dude asked my nationality. I told him I would not tell him. He was surprised. I repeated again, " I won't tell you!" And that was it. None of their business.
With such questions as ethnicity, religion, etc. and situation permitting, I just say " I have the right to remain silent". Actually, it works. People leave you alone.