Happier Abroad Forum Community

How would you handle this situation?

Over a year ago, I put down a 9000p deposit on my apartment when I first moved in. At that time, my land lady told me that she would not be able to refund this deposit, instead I would have to just consume it during the last month before I move out.

Now the thing is, her husband had multiple schlerosis or something like that, which eventually killed him. During that time, she borrowed a ton of money from creditors or loan sharks to pay for all the enormous medical bills while he slowly passed away. So now, every month, when I give her the 6000p rent, she says she uses virtually all of it to pay back these creditors that she had to borrow from, and has nothing left. (her food comes from her brother's salary she says)

From what I heard, these loan sharks may take away your house or even have you killed, if you don't pay them up.

So I wondered, if I consume my 9000p deposit, then that means she would not be able to pay these loan sharks for at least a month. How would she handle that?

So I brought this up to her a few times when she came for the rent. I asked her how I could consume the deposit when she had to pay these creditors each month and had no other source of income. She merely shrugged and said "I don't know" as if she didn't want to deal with this topic.

Recently, I texted her on my cell phone a few times about this. I wanted to know upfront what she intended to do about this problem or if she intended to not let me consume my 9000p and just "steal it" from me for the sake of these creditors. She refused to answer or address this question. Instead, a few days later she texted me saying she had no cell phone load and then gave me this pity story about how her daughter (full grown) was sick and had to go to the hospital and that they couldn't even afford to pay the bills. Now, I'm not good with indirect communication, but it seems that she was trying to make me feel sorry for her so I would just forget the issue of my 9000p deposit.

Anyway, this is a very nice lady. She is kind, warm, personable and likable. It's not in her nature to rip someone off or be an a-hole at all. I can see a lot of honesty in her eyes. So I am sure she is a very good person at heart, with no malice or deceit in her.

But she continues to avoid this issue, so what should I do?

Should I continue to press for an answer, and even refuse to pay the next rent payment until she gives me an answer first?

I've also told her that another solution is for me to find another renter who would be willing to give me the deposit, eliminating my balance owed, and move in right when I move out so that she wouldn't miss any payments. But she has also remained silent on this.

What would you do in this situation? (assuming that you are on a tight budget and that 9000p is a lot of money to you of course)

I do have all the receipts from this deposit by the way.

Well did you have a written rental agreement outlining the terms of the lease agreement? If you don't your pretty much shit out of luck as it's her word against yours if you want to get your money. I would just say your moving out and take your free 6 weeks and look for a new place. She said the deposit was non refundable, so you might as well take advantage and not pay the last 6 weeks of your rent. I make sure there is some kind of rental agreement before I move into any place.

Mr S wrote:Well did you have a written rental agreement outlining the terms of the lease agreement? If you don't your pretty much shit out of luck as it's her word against yours if you want to get your money. I would just say your moving out and take your free 6 weeks and look for a new place. She said the deposit was non refundable, so you might as well take advantage and not pay the last 6 weeks of your rent. I make sure there is some kind of rental agreement before I move into any place.

W: I signed a basic agreement, and I think the deposit was mentioned on it. But I am not sure I have a copy of that agreement. It was nothing special. But I do have a receipt for the 9000p deposit though.

I was going to just not pay for the last month, that was the deal. But I'm not sure if she would let me. That's the problem. She might demand that I move out and not use up the last month (the other 3000p was for utility) because she owes her "loan sharks" every month or else they take away her house. So far, she refuses to discuss it.

You can consume the deposit you’ve made before you leave the rented premises. However, it is impossible for you to get the change for the PHP9000 after deducting your last month’s rent because she has no means to pay you. Don’t be afraid about the loan sharks. These people won’t hurt you because you are not the debtor. I understand that you feel sorry for your landlady but that is beside the point. If she won’t allow you to leave the premises or won’t allow you to consume the deposit, you may seek assistance from the Barangay officials of the place where the house is located.


I am confident that she will let you use the deposit as payment for your last month’s stay in the house. She is not discussing this concern with you because she does not want to loose you as her lessee because you’re paying her on time. Don’t fall into her emotional blackmail tactics. Filipinos have the gift of employing emotional blackmail to appeal their financial state to unsuspecting foreigners. Better find a place where the owner is financially stable for less complicated transactions. Tell her to look for possible lessee of the place as early as now and make sure that she knows your intention of leaving by the end of the month. Don’t be swayed by her plea. It would get worst in the future you’ll see. Just my two cents worth.

Just use the deposit like you originally planned; the world is full of pain and suffering. Or ask her how much she needs to pay off the loan sharks and cut a deal to either buy her property or get a 50% to 80% rent reduction for paying a few years in advance.

AsiaBill wrote:Just use the deposit like you originally planned; the world is full of pain and suffering. Or ask her how much she needs to pay off the loan sharks and cut a deal to either buy her property or get a 50% to 80% rent reduction for paying a few years in advance.

W: What if she doesn't let me? What can I do?

I think I know why she doesn't want me to find another tenant who will pay me the deposit back and move in immediately so she doesn't miss her payments. It's because she hopes I will forget my deposit and then the next renter will give her another 9000p as his deposit, so she gets another extra 9000p! Duh. lol

What wishful thinking.

Another logistical problem is that even if I consume one month for the deposit, that's 6000p consumed. There's still an extra 3000p left. Originally, that was supposed to apply toward the utility bill, which averages around 2000p per month. But if she doesn't even have any cash, she won't be able to pay that, so she will have to ask me to. In that case, I could only consume it by staying another two weeks, making the total 6 weeks.

WWu777 wrote: So I brought this up to her a few times when she came for the rent. I asked her how I could consume the deposit when she had to pay these creditors each month and had no other source of income. She merely shrugged and said "I don't know" as if she didn't want to deal with this topic.

Recently, I texted her on my cell phone a few times about this. I wanted to know upfront what she intended to do about this problem or if she intended to not let me consume my 9000p and just "steal it" from me for the sake of these creditors. She refused to answer or address this question. Instead, a few days later she texted me saying she had no cell phone load and then gave me this pity story about how her daughter (full grown) was sick and had to go to the hospital and that they couldn't even afford to pay the bills. Now, I'm not good with indirect communication, but it seems that she was trying to make me feel sorry for her so I would just forget the issue of my 9000p deposit.

Is rent paid end of the month or first of the month?

If rent is paid end of the month, just stay for your last month, pack up and leave. Tell her the rent and utilities will be paid from the original deposit, and she can keep any remaining amount for cleaning service.

Her problems with loan sharks is not your problem. Once you move out she can find another tenant. Do not assume that she is completely helpless, or that she'd tell you how many other people she could borrow money from.

In Singapore, even when business is going really well, most business owners will tell you their business sucks, times are hard, etc.

The rent is paid on the first of the month of course, or else they'd get jipped a lot.

She is cashless and wouldn't be able to pay the utilities from my deposit, since she spent it all long ago. So it's likely that I would have to consume it too, by staying 6 weeks, and paying all the utilities myself.

By the way, just an update. My landlady finally replied and said that yeah I could consume my deposit when I move out. So all's settled.