Why do shoelaces exist?

[Winston]

They seem tedious, primitive and unnecessary. I remember back in the 80's that the government wanted kids to use shoelaces to tie their shoes because it would make them smarter!

Why not just do away with them and make all shoes velcro? That would be more efficient.

With some shoelaces, you have to tie a double knot cause they are so loose and slippery that they constantly come loose so that you have to tie them every hour at least. Why do they make such slippery shoelaces?

The thing is, what if you were in a life or death situation, and the extra time required to tie your shoelaces to avoid tripping on them made the difference between life and death? That would suck wouldn't it? Don't they ever consider that?

When I'm in a situation where every second counts, and I have to stop to tie my damn shoelaces to avoid the risk of tripping on them, I see my life flash before my eyes where I'm screwed due to the extra time lost in having to retie shoelaces! It's annoying.