Song about Tsar

[Voyager1]

So apropos.

[Tsar]

When I first read the title I didn't know what to expect but I enjoyed the song. It sort of does describe some of my circumstances except I can't say my heart was ever truly broken because I never had romantic love.

[HenryGeorge]

Yes were a pretty good band...

[flowerthief00]

They were one of the very best bands, from an era that seems like a dream what with the rubbish we have today. The four incredible albums of theirs are The Yes Album, Fragile, Relayer, and Close to the Edge.

[Voyager1]

Fleetwood Mac - Go Your Own Way



Lyrics

You can go your own way
Go your own way
You can call it another lonely day
You can go your own way
Go your own way

Tell me why
Everything turned around
Packing up
all you wanna do
Open up
Everything's waiting for you

You can go your own way
Go your own way
You can call it another lonely day
You can go your own way
Go your own way

You can go your own way
Go your own way
You can call it another lonely day
Another lonely day
You can go your own way

Go your own way
You can call it another lonely day
You can go your own way
You can call it another lonely day
You can go your own way

[yick]

There was a young man named tsar
Who thought a lot about teenagers from afar
He thought he would be the man if he could get one
Nice and slim and doesn't weigh a ton
To impress such a girl, he wouldn't even need a car
Because they would be too young to take them to a cocktail bar
He spent many years building up scenarios in his head
What he would do with them once he got them in his bed
But he flew to Bulgaria and it was there he started to lose hope
With no job, no money and no girls - he felt a bit of a dope
To cheer himself up, he feasted on wild boar
And then he one day woke up with worms crawling around his nutsack that made his penis sore
He cried 'mummy, I want to go home' the expat life is not for me
I want to be back in America, now I must flee
Maybe it would be better if tsar stayed in America and took his vacations to places that are near
Then he wouldn't have nothing more to fear
Other than a boring and dull life
But he would at least escape the kind of escapades that give him strife.

[Tsar]

Terrible song, Yick. Don't you ever become a bard or a singer...

Otherwise...

[yick]

It's a poem you thick twat!

You should be honoured that I wrote it in your honour... people would pay good money for a poem that good, that rhymes...

[Tsar]

It's a poem you thick twat!

You should be honoured that I wrote it in your honour... people would pay good money for a poem that good, that rhymes...

It is not reality, You are lying about me and insulting me in that poem. You should be ashamed. Am just by writing it, you are showing you don't care that I am ill...potentially fatally ill considering I don't know what is happened to me...

[Shemp]

Here lies Tsar,
Who didn't get far.
Lacking money
He wanted a young honey.
Crossed the ocean wide
Seeking a Bulgarian bride.
Bummed around in Sofia
Until he got diarrhea
From eating raw pork.
What a dork!
Afraid to tell girls hello,
Now hit by this cruel blow,
His brains eaten by a maggot,
Still whining like a faggot,
He flew home in shame,
Having failed in his aim.
Blew the last of his cash
On a Mexican medical tourism dash,
Then died alone,
Far from home,
And was buried in a ditch.
Ain't life a bitch?
Now the woeful tale you know,
Of him who rests here 6 feet below.

[yick]

Here lies Tsar,
Who didn't get far.
Lacking money
He wanted a young honey.
Crossed the ocean wide
Seeking a Bulgarian bride.
Bummed around in Sofia
Until he got diarrhea
From eating raw pork.
What a dork!
Afraid to tell girls hello,
Now hit by this cruel blow,
His brains eaten by a maggot,
Still whining like a faggot,
He flew home in shame,
Having failed in his aim.
Blew the last of his cash
On a Mexican medical tourism dash,
Then died alone,
Far from home,
And was buried in a ditch.
Ain't life a bitch?
Now the woeful tale you know,
Of him who rests here 6 feet below.

Very good, Frank!

[yick]

There was a chap named Tsar
Who graduated college but couldn't enter the bar
A life in law was not meant to be
So he thought 'what next, I need to flee'
He looked at pictures of girls in Russia on the internet
And he thought that a life there looked a sure bet
He registered an account on 'Happier Abroad'
Getting advice off Winston and his chums seemed the way forward
He eventually took the plane to his dream life
To f**k loads of beautiful teenagers, not looking for a wife
But he found out his bad luck abroad was just as rife
Just like back home, wherever you are fate cuts into dreams like a knife
He is now back in America, angrier but wiser
Wherever you go, life is basically the same, next time he can see it from reality without the need of a visor

[yick]

There was a kid named tsar
His family thought he was useless and that in life he wasn't going to go far
Tsar had enough and vowed 'I will show them one day'
I will make it abroad and f**k many young teenagers come what may
His uncle offered him a 30000 dollar a year job to stay where he was
Tsar replied, stick your job up your arse you knob
I am off to Europe, now I am an Italian man
Rent and food is cheap but if not, I can live in a camper van
Girls over there don't care as long as I am American - they will think I am a Fancy Dan
But in this life, dreams can never oust a reliable plan
Tsar got sick by eating something out of a can
A big f**k off worm crawling around his nutsack
The time time had come to cut his losses and ran
As the shit had definitely hit the fan
All his family nodded to each other and said 'yeah, we knew he would be back'
Nobody knows to this day if Tsar has what it takes or if he will ever hit his peak
Just to let you know that he starts his 30000 dollar a year job next week

[Voyager1]

Hey guys don't be so harsh on Tsar. He may be dying. I originally posted the song as a kind of farewell sendoff in case Tsar decides to leave us.

My gut is though that he won't die but may become severely injured from his illness and unable to do cold approaches thus killing his dream of ever getting his virgin bride.

Tsar, what's your current status? Any improvement?

[yick]

Of course Tsar isn't dying
The little shit is absolutely lying
If you were on your death bed
The last thing you would be doing is posting on here instead of taking your meds
He is just embarrassed that his trip abroad ended in tears
But hey, at least he faced up to his fears and had a go
Even though he didn't have that much dough
What he needs to do now is man up and get a job
And save his cash so he has a few bob
Go somewhere else, the world is so big
Don't give up on the first go, this is a good gig
But sometimes life abroad is about toughing things out
It's just that some people are not up to it, without a doubt
Tsar might learn some lessons from his first try
If not, he can always come on here and have a good cry.