Happier Abroad Forum Community

I don't get something.

If men and women are supposed to be "equal" in America, then:

- How come a husband has to call his wife "the boss"? Most husbands I've met do that. How is that equal?
- How come in a relationship, and in general, the needs of the man or husband do NOT matter and are NOT important, but the needs of the woman or wife are VERY important and the man must place her needs ABOVE his own?
- How come men are required to "respect" women (aka "obeying them") and be considerate to them, but women are not required to "respect" men and be considerate to them?
- How come when a man and woman disagree on something, the woman acts like she is entitled to be "right" and win the argument just because she's a woman, and not because there is any reason or logic in her argument? How does being a woman automatically make you right, even when you're wrong? That's 100 percent illogical and an insult to males.
- How come if you're a man and you're picky about looks in women, you will be told that you should not judge women by their looks because it's shallow, demeaning and objectifying? You will be told that you should lower your standards. But if you're a woman and you're picky about looks in men, then it's ok because women are automatically entitled and deserve the best in everything. So they can be as picky as they want. That's a huge f***ing double standard!
- How come if you're a man, it is a taboo for you to openly express your desires and needs? If you so, you will be seen as a selfish douchebag. But if you're a woman, then it is ok. If she does so, she will be called an "assertive woman" for it. Wtf?
- How come if you say that "men are smarter than women" you will be called a chauvinist sexist pig? But if you say "women are smarter than men" then it will be accepted and condoned. Wtf?

How are these things "equal"? WTF? I don't get it. They look like blatant double standards to me. Am I missing something?

Something seems awfully fishy and deceptive about all this.

How would a liberated, liberal, feminist type of woman answer this question?

i have NEVER heard anyone deride a woman for wanting a man that has status and good looks in america......they are allowed to gold dig all day and its fine.....but if a woman in another country wants to get married to an american man OH NO "she just wants a greencard" haha really??? what a demeaning thing to assume about people.....and these women talk about being open minded and not discriminating.....give me a break....and yes, if you dont want to marry someone who is fat who doesnt take care of themselves or isnt pretty you are a "shallow hal" hahaha

Hello,

The answer is the demented American male. This man was always a bit strange and took pride in doing things 'differently from others'. He thinks he's being 'progressive' when he encourages feminism {(it's the men who encourage feminism the most in U.S.A.)}.

The reason for this is simple ~ he does this to be 'different' because of his arrogance. And this has been his undoing.

Unfortunately, China, Russia and India became trapped by this stupid man very very easily!

Winston wrote:How would a liberated, liberal, feminist type of woman answer this question?

She'd call you a misogynist, or a loser who can't get laid. Possibly both.

And she won't address any of your points.

She'll also say you're a 'weak' man that can't 'handle' a 'strong' woman.

Winston wrote:I don't get something.

If men and women are supposed to be "equal" in America, then:

- How come a husband has to call his wife "the boss"? Most husbands I've met do that. How is that equal?

I don't join men in saying stuff like that. I believe a wife should submit to her husband and I might even say something like that on TV if the opportunity arises. Calling the wife the boss, even as a joke, reinforces a messed up part of our culture.

- How come in a relationship, and in general, the needs of the man or husband do NOT matter and are NOT important, but the needs of the woman or wife are VERY important and the man must place her needs ABOVE his own?

It depends on the needs. But if you are a man, you've got to assert yourself for certain needs.

For some needs, us guys are protectors protecting the fragile women. They take care of some of our needs, and we face the elements, tigers, robbers, etc. to protect them. If it's really hot or cold or raining outside and someone left something in the car, the man goes out and gets it. Some of the men's movement folks are 'feminized', waning gender sameness. I think our masculine tendency to protect women is a good thing. But they should also take care of our needs, too.

- How come men are required to "respect" women (aka "obeying them") and be considerate to them, but women are not required to "respect" men and be considerate to them?

This sounds like a relationship issue. Don't go for this sort of thing. You have a choice of who you have a relationship with and man must maintain his frame and mold the relationship in a direction of her submitting to him and respecting him. He has to call her out on her disrespect.

My wife doesn't call me names or anything like that, but if her tone of voice is disrespectful, I am likely to point it out to her. She knows she needs to respect me. I have to draw a boundary for her to so she'll know what I consider to be respectful.

- How come when a man and woman disagree on something, the woman acts like she is entitled to be "right" and win the argument just because she's a woman, and not because there is any reason or logic in her argument? How does being a woman automatically make you right, even when you're wrong? That's 100 percent illogical and an insult to males.

This is where a man has to exercise his skills. There are different ways of handling it. IMO, a way to loose is to get drawn into her emotional storm, if she's in one. You can also just treat her like she's a kid having a tantrum, laugh stuff off and not take it too seriously, or disengage and tell her you'll talk when she's ready to be reasonable. Women can be illogical at times. We all know that.

- How come if you're a man and you're picky about looks in women, you will be told that you should not judge women by their looks because it's shallow, demeaning and objectifying? You will be told that you should lower your standards. But if you're a woman and you're picky about looks in men, then it's ok because women are automatically entitled and deserve the best in everything. So they can be as picky as they want. That's a huge f***ing double standard!

Who do you go around telling about your tastes in women's looks? Why would you share that with women in the first place?

- How come if you're a man, it is a taboo for you to openly express your desires and needs? If you so, you will be seen as a selfish douchebag. But if you're a woman, then it is ok. If she does so, she will be called an "assertive woman" for it. Wtf?

Several years ago, I saw a piece on the news where a man being hired asked for a higher salary. A woman did the same. The woman was seen as too aggressive, but the man's assertiveness was accepted. It may be we don't notice as much if a man is being assertive, since its a normal male trait.

If you are talking about sex, this is a double standard and we all know it. But if a woman is asserting her sexual needs and she isn't married, she may be labeled a slut as well.

- How come if you say that "men are smarter than women" you will be called a chauvinist sexist pig? But if you say "women are smarter than men" then it will be accepted and condoned. Wtf?

That's a double standard. If a woman says women are smarter than men, you can start asking, "Who invented the _______"? And go through a list of inventions.

How would a liberated, liberal, feminist type of woman answer this question?

Go to a forum where they hang out and ask them. There aren't too many here.

Women in the U.S want guys that looks like Brad Pitt and has a fat bank account while men must settle for anything they can get, even if a man's options are fat ugly chicks.

If women want guys that looks like Brad Pitt and has a fat bank account, then I can want women that look like supermodels.

Women can be clingy to their boyfriends but when a man does that, women get creeped out by it.

So many don't even know where to begin...

Men who want sex with no strings attached are labeled as misogynistic pigs, while women are allowed to seek sex with no strings attached and nobody has any problem with it.

Men who are interested in younger women are labeled as sleazy perverts, while women who are into younger men are considered sexy. Many people even suggest that women who have sex with underage boys should not be punished. Those same people advocate draconian punishments for men who commit the same crime.

A woman is allowed to say she doesn't like short men, fat men, older men, black men, white men, asian men, etc. but if a man says expresses ANY of these preferences he is a shallow jerk. Men are constantly shamed for wanting women "out of their league" but if any man dares say anything about a woman's ridiculously high standards, he is an entitled misogynist.

Here's a big one, women are allowed to be sensitive and demand respect, but if a man does the same, he is labeled as "thin-skinned" and "a sissy". At the place I work, it is well known and accepted by everyone that the managers are much easier on the females.

This is just a few of them.

Women have very much arranged things to suit themselves,
Even to the point of allowing abortion.
To women it does not matter whether it is Right or Wrong, the only thing they know Is what they want.
And keep out of her way if you are in any way going to try to prevent her from getting what she wants.

But what are their short term satisfactions worth, compared to the Long Term?
Compared to what happens after the current life?
When they find that doing things that are Wrong matter quite a lot.

And if they do not honour and respect Men then how can possibly honour and respect God?

fmagellan wrote:So many don't even know where to begin...

Men who want sex with no strings attached are labeled as misogynistic pigs, while women are allowed to seek sex with no strings attached and nobody has any problem with it.

Men who are interested in younger women are labeled as sleazy perverts, while women who are into younger men are considered sexy. Many people even suggest that women who have sex with underage boys should not be punished. Those same people advocate draconian punishments for men who commit the same crime.

A woman is allowed to say she doesn't like short men, fat men, older men, black men, white men, asian men, etc. but if a man says expresses ANY of these preferences he is a shallow jerk. Men are constantly shamed for wanting women "out of their league" but if any man dares say anything about a woman's ridiculously high standards, he is an entitled misogynist.

Here's a big one, women are allowed to be sensitive and demand respect, but if a man does the same, he is labeled as "thin-skinned" and "a sissy". At the place I work, it is well known and accepted by everyone that the managers are much easier on the females.

This is just a few of them.

Great points!!!

fmagellan wrote:So many don't even know where to begin...

Men who want sex with no strings attached are labeled as misogynistic pigs, while women are allowed to seek sex with no strings attached and nobody has any problem with it.

Men who are interested in younger women are labeled as sleazy perverts, while women who are into younger men are considered sexy. Many people even suggest that women who have sex with underage boys should not be punished. Those same people advocate draconian punishments for men who commit the same crime.

A woman is allowed to say she doesn't like short men, fat men, older men, black men, white men, asian men, etc. but if a man says expresses ANY of these preferences he is a shallow jerk. Men are constantly shamed for wanting women "out of their league" but if any man dares say anything about a woman's ridiculously high standards, he is an entitled misogynist.

Here's a big one, women are allowed to be sensitive and demand respect, but if a man does the same, he is labeled as "thin-skinned" and "a sissy". At the place I work, it is well known and accepted by everyone that the managers are much easier on the females.

This is just a few of them.

Great points!!!

If a woman doesn't want a man, and won't date or marry them, she is considered "strong and independent". If a man doesn't want a woman, and won't date or marry them, he is considered a misogynistic loser.