Happier Abroad Forum Community

I just want to make a vehement rant:

TAIWAN SUCKS!!!

In all areas and categories except for food and safety. Seriously. I can't win no matter what. Here's why:

- The vibe everywhere is extremely repressed, miserable, boring and sterile. Women give off this negative energy for some reason. The overall atmosphere is soul sucking, like there are hungry ghosts draining your life force or some dark energy vortex in Taiwan, which is taboo to talk about of course. I don't know if it's my imagination or if I'm projecting my own misery externally, but I tend to be empathic and sensitive to energy. People have vibes, so why can't places? I may be right, because Taiwan does have a high suicide rate (like Japan), and Taiwanese people do not look truly happy. They look extremely repressed, stiff and their smiles appear phony. So perhaps people do sense it subconsciously but falsely assume that the misery is coming from within themselves?

- If you think about it, I am checkmated from every angle in Taiwan. I can't date decent looking normal girls, and I can't get p4p either, because most p4p females here are not doable and look like hags. Or they have really shitty attitudes. Plus, the black world of Taiwan is a bit dodgy with bad vibes and seedy characters that are not good to be around. Rock and I met a few shady characters during our exploration of the "black world" of Chiayi, and got into near confrontations with some of them, which could have turned out ugly if we had played our cards wrong. So I can't get normal love/romance and I can't pay for it either. And even if I tried to pay for it, most likely I'd be ripped off or disappointed since people in the black world of Taiwan have shitty attitudes, as Rock and I experienced. Therefore, I don't have options and it's a no win.

- Recently, a girl I met at 3am with Rock when he was here, turned out to be a hustler for cash. She was tall and skinny, which is in the ball park range of my type. But every time I met her, she'd hustle me for cash, making me feel guilty if I refused. I didn't know girls like that existed in Taiwan. Usually only crack whores do that, and in the US too. I was shellshocked because Taiwanese girls are usually the least likely to ask for money. When two Taiwanese girls from Couchsurfing.org came over and went to Alishan with me, they wouldn't let me pay for anything, even though they were nearly broke and couldn't afford any food outside of 7-11. This hustler also had a shitty personality and kept arguing with me. It was emotionally draining to be around her. Her personality reminded me of Katya, never able to sit down and have a conversation because she was always restless to go somewhere, always in a rush to go somewhere 24/7. I hate that attitude. How can someone be that way?

She also turned out to be a professional p4p girl, on a break due to her stomach surgery, so she desperately needed to borrow cash and keep hustling me for it. Every time I gave her some, she'd be back to zero the next day and would need more. f**k that. I did drive her to the hospital to get her medicine and help her with her co-pay there. But beyond that, no way am I gonna keep giving her free money everyday without end. That's insane. I can't believe she feels no shame when she hustles me. Why doesn't she feel any shame? Rock said that her pimp probably abuses her and demands that she go out and hustle people for cash. What a crazy existence. Sheesh.

So what this means is that Taiwanese girls basically ignore me and don't give a shit about me, unless they have BAD INTENTIONS?! WTF?! Gee that makes me feel so special! f**k! What an insult!

Btw, that Vietnamese girl I met with Rock who seemed to like me flaked too. She asked me to bring her flowers and candy for Chinese Valentine's Day. I did so, just as she asked, and then she suddenly dumped me and stopped calling me and stopped answering my calls. WTF? She was very direct and said all the right things in the beginning. Rock and I sensed that something was off about her though. Rock suspects that she might have a boyfriend and was using me to make him jealous.

- Wait, ok so far TWO girls have genuinely liked me, and I even slept with one of them. But the big problem is that both of them were 100 percent NOT my type, but are at the extreme opposite end of it - short and not attractive at all. WTF man?! My standards aren't even that high, as I find 80 percent of girls in Taiwan to be attractive. Sheesh. You know, I would have been HAPPY if the girls that liked me were at least 50 percent my type! But ZERO percent?! WTF?! In Taiwan I see girls EVERYWHERE who are my type, so why can't I even have just ONE of them?! Sheesh! MURPHY'S LAW STRIKES AGAIN! Everything is always f***ing Murphy's Law! It reminds me of when I was in Russia and I met hundreds of girls, yet the ONLY one that liked me was the ONLY one I wasn't attracted to, which was the ULTIMATE example of Murphy's Law! f**k! I can't believe how unlucky I often am in this area! I don't need a girl to be perfect or 100 percent fit my ideal. Just at least in the ball park range. Sheesh. Why is that so much to ask for? Why are the least attractive girls always going for me? I even had better luck in America than Taiwan! Imagine that! So ridiculous. TOTALLY SUCKS!

- My parents can't introduce me to any girls, and never have been able to. And neither can any of my relatives, who hardly see us now and act more American now than they were back in the 80's when they were friendlier and warmer. All they do is exchange polite pleasantries at family reunions, nothing more, which is so typical American. Also, Rock can't introduce me to any girls either, even though he's been here for 10 years - how strange is that? And neither can Momopi, though he said he could in the past, but never followed through, and I bet you anything if I asked him now, there'd be some excuse. In Taiwan, everything is all EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES. Nothing but excuses. No one has solutions, unless you are talking about simple practical problems. So boring and no fun! Yet I'm supposed to act always positive about Taiwan because it's socially appropriate?! My expat friend Mark has introduced me to a number of women, but they all turned out to be older and unattractive, or flaky.

- In Taiwan I am not allowed to take action myself in that I am not allowed to just walk up to a girl I like and say "Excuse me Miss. I think you're very attractive and I'd like to meet you." like I can in Russia, Europe and Latin America. Plus, flirting is taboo here and you have to act very innocent and indirect to fit into the social style of Taiwan. If you ask a girl a question, you can't just do it in an open relaxed manner, you have to act bashful and shy, because that's how people act here, so I assume it's the appropriate way of greeting a female when you say "Shau jie, chin wun..." It's all complicated and difficult and requires lots of patience with low success rates. What this means is that I can't use my flirtation skills to my advantage too, which greatly handicaps me since that is my major strength and technique of meeting/dating girls. Like I said, everything is against me in Taiwan. It's as if Taiwan is my enemy or something. f**k.

Even when I do meet girls in Taiwan, it's all platonic or else they just add me to their Facebook and never write me or offer to meet me again, unlike girls in other foreign countries. Instead, they are always busy and don't care about me.

Conclusion:

So you see, from every angle I am CHECKMATED in Taiwan with no options and no solutions! Everything appears to be against me in Taiwan, as though Taiwan were my enemy or something. WTF?! Usually I am very resourceful and good at finding solutions and options. But in Taiwan I am checkmated from every angle. I just can't win! Everything is against me! WTF?! Is Taiwan a curse or jinx or something? How can I be so unlucky on a small island like this, where everyone says "Taiwan is so great! People are so friendly!" f**k MAN! TOTALLY SUCKS!

Sorry for all you Taiwan lovers out there, but I have a right to tell it like it is with no BS, especially since I'm in a no win situation where no one has solutions and everyone only has excuses. In fact, Taiwan is basically a nation of excuses. If you feel lonely for instance, and deprived of sex or romance, people aren't going to give you solutions. They will only give you excuses. And no one will care either, since all people care about here is work work work work work ad infinitum! And all they give are excuses excuses excuses! No real answers. Sheesh.

Case in point: We have two brilliant Taiwan experts on this forum, Momopi and Rock. Both are highly knowledgeable, educated, wise and intellectual, as you can see in their posts. Yet even they have NO SOLUTIONS to the problems above which block me from every angle. Instead, all they have are excuses excuses excuses. See what I mean? If Momopi and Rock have no solutions, then what solution could an average conformist drone in Taiwan give? See what I mean? Taiwan is a nation of excuses, not solutions.

Addendum:

Furthermore, I tend to lose my cool when driving in Taiwan. So many vehicles are rude and inconsiderate. Apparently, when driving in the city, I am not allowed to slow down to look for parking, slow down for one second to check to see if the place I'm going to is open or not, without someone angrily honking at me from behind. Some drivers don't even like it when I stop at an intersection to look both ways before crossing it, or stopping to look both ways before making a simple turn! WTF?! What is their f***ing problem? Why do they have a right to honk at me and yell at me for doing simple things? Why should I drive dangerously and not look before making a turn? Who the f**k do they think they are?

The other night, I only stopped one second to see if the veggie place I was going to was open or not. It was closed, but it was dark so I had to double check to make sure. Just for slowing down one or two seconds, a van angrily honked at me with a long honk. I lost it and angrily honked back at his rudeness and disruption of my sensitive hearing. Then I rolled down the window and in a rage yelled at the top of my lungs "f**k YOU YOU f***ing ASSHOLE! f**k YOU!!!!!!!!!! f**k YOU!!!!!!!!!" I was in a rage and about to get out of the car and kick the f***ing shit out of him, unleashing all my strength. But he drove past me and from behind, I continued honking at him and yelling at him at the top of my lungs out the window. I followed him and continued honking at him in anger, before he made a turn and drove off. I was definitely in the mood to get violent. He was probably scared that I overreacted.

At least it will teach him not to honk at people inappropriately next time. But why should I have to teach every asshole in Taiwan not to honk at me rudely? My parents always told me to never honk back at people, or else I might start a road rage. But that's not fair. Why can others honk at me but I can't honk back at them?

So you see, city people piss me off and disrupt my senses and cause me to lose my temper. I simply have no tolerance for f***ing assholes like that! That's why I try to avoid going out unless I have to in Taiwan, lest I risk getting into fights and confrontations, which is risky for me and bad for my peace of mind. Where I grew up, no one would honk at you for doing a normal thing like slowing down for a second to look at something. It's very rude and inconsiderate and unwarranted too. That's why I'm better off in the suburbs or mountains, where there is more peace and quiet, and less assholes for me to lose my temper at. I simply have no tolerance for them and lose my temper easily. Plus as a writer and introvert, I recharge on peace and quiet, not noise and stupid crowds.

Taiwan cities are bad for me. They are full of stress, assholes, traffic and cement, all of which are NOT conducive to spirituality, but instead are all about commercialism, consumerism and work work work work work. Very heartless and soulless. Living under all that is very draining, even if it is filled with modern conveniences. Also, Taiwanese cities aren't designed for cars to park in, only for scooters, and this includes small cities too, like Chiayi, not just big ones. But if you ride a scooter, you take a big risk because one accident could end your life or put you in critical condition. So in other words, driving in Taiwan puts you between a rock and hard place. It's also dangerous making turns in a car, because every time you do, you have to carefully check for scooters driving alongside you, which are everywhere like ants, lest you knock them over. What happens if you forget to look just once...? Sheesh.

Moreover, on some busy roads, when swarms of scooters are passing next to you, you can't see clearly to be 100 percent sure that it's safe to turn and go through them. That happened to me once, and the cars behind me honked and yelled at me. But what can I do? I can't just cut through a swarm of scooters, because I can't be completely sure that it would be safe with so many scooters to look out for that are so close by with such a slim margin of error! Yet if I don't, the cars behind me get pissed. Sheesh. How do I win? Again, I am between a rock and hard place.

So you see, in Taiwan, I either have a bland unsatisfying social experience, or I have a negative experience and confrontation, like I do with asshole drivers in the city. That's another reason why Taiwan sucks, sorry to say. Nothing or negative is a terrible choice.

Maybe if I wasn't so frustrated from being checkmated by all the things listed above, my temper would be better and more tolerant and I wouldn't lose my cool so easily. Probably. It's logical to assume that unhappy frustrated people will lose their temper more easily than a happy content people would.

Addendum 2:

In the expat Compass magazine, produced by TaiwanFun.com, I read a weird story about an expat named Shaun Bettinson, who started a bizarre campaign to get everyone in Taiwan to raise up their arms and say "I love Taiwan" and take a photo of themselves doing it and uploading it to the internet. What a weirdo. Why should everyone say "I love Taiwan" for no reason other than because some guy named Shaun says so? Weird. I don't get people like that. Sounds like another fake Janet Hsieh type of mentality - fake positivity for no reason. I ought to contact this Shaun guy and forward the above list to him to try to rock his boat. LOL

Here are some articles about him:

http://www.chinapost.com.tw/dream/2012/ ... he-man.htm
http://yffm.wordpress.com/2012/05/03/th ... oes-viral/

Here is his "I love Taiwan" video that's gone viral:



This dude is weird. I should write a post in my Janet Hsieh Sucks blog and address it to him.

Actually, much of what you posted, especially the traffic and infrastructure-related stuff, is pretty much the same in China, or even worse. All that doesn't bother me though, since I just accept as a part of daily life.

Culturally, Taiwan is not really that much different from China, since Taiwan is overwhelmingly Han Chinese in terms of both culture and ethnicity.

If you are that much of a misfit in Taiwan, then you should really try a country where Chinese culture does not predominate. This means excluding China, Singapore, Malaysia, and Hong Kong. I have never felt like a misfit in Taiwan, though sometimes I did get annoyed by some of their behaviors and norms.

Falcon wrote:Actually, much of what you posted, especially the traffic and infrastructure-related stuff, is pretty much the same in China, or even worse. All that doesn't bother me though, since I just accept as a part of daily life.

Culturally, Taiwan is not really that much different from China, since Taiwan is overwhelmingly Han Chinese in terms of both culture and ethnicity.

If you are that much of a misfit in Taiwan, then you should really try a country where Chinese culture does not predominate. This means excluding China, Singapore, Malaysia, and Hong Kong. I have never felt like a misfit in Taiwan, though sometimes I did get annoyed by some of their behaviors and norms.

Not really. I've observed mainland Chinese here and they are nothing like Taiwanese. In fact, Taiwanese are more like a hybrid of Chinese and Japanese characteristics. Am I right?

Anywhere I don't get attention from girls, I will feel like a misfit. lol

At least Chinese girls write me back and say that they want to meet me. When Taiwanese girls write me back, they never offer to meet.

Another thing to add to the above:

Taiwan is basically a nation of excuses. If you feel lonely for instance, and deprived of sex or romance, people aren't going to give you solutions. They will only give you excuses. And no one will care either, since all people care about here is work work work work work ad infinitum! And all they give are excuses excuses excuses! No real answers. Sheesh.

Case in point: We have two brilliant Taiwan experts on this forum, Momopi and Rock. Both are highly knowledgeable, educated, wise and intellectual, as you can see in their posts. Yet even they have NO SOLUTIONS to the problems above which block me from every angle. Instead, all they have are excuses excuses excuses. See what I mean? If Momopi and Rock have no solutions, then what solution could an average conformist drone in Taiwan give? See what I mean? Taiwan is a nation of excuses, not solutions.

Winston wrote:Not really. I've observed mainland Chinese here and they are nothing like Taiwanese. In fact, Taiwanese are more like a hybrid of Chinese and Japanese characteristics. Am I right?

Yes, your second statement is right. Since Taiwanese would still have more Chinese than Japanese characteristics, that means your first statement doesn't really make sense.

Urban middle-class Taiwanese are still quite different from rural Chinese peasants though. Urban Taiwanese are much more prone to being cliquish and nagging about negative things. Your average rural Chinese peasant would be just delighted to chat with outside visitors while smoking and squatting by the roadside, whereas urban Taiwanese are not nearly as simple and easygoing. I know this from personal experience.

Some Cantonese and Shanghainese seem to be more like the Taiwanese in many ways, and much less like the easygoing rural Chinese.

That being said, I would much rather visit, live, or date in southwestern China than in Taiwan, especially in ethnic minority areas. I absolutely love the people and culture there. Taiwan could work too, but it is not as "exciting."

Falcon,
How do you explain the differences between Chinese and Taiwanese that I cited in this thread?

viewtopic.php?t=14564

Actually, many of my bad high school experiences with women in the U.S. that I had been writing about, were with Taiwanese-American girls. The mainland Chinese and Mexican women that I met later during my trips were complete polar opposites. Of course there are some counterexamples, but I definitely did see strong patterns (think of a bell curve).

It's not just because they're American, or Taiwanese, or just had personal issues, but maybe a combination of those factors.

If I ever do have the time and desire to visit Taiwan, I would be happy to test out your theory that Taiwanese women are far more unapproachable than Chinese women. My past visits to Taiwan were when I was too young to be running around by myself and chatting up random people.

Falcon wrote:Actually, many of my bad high school experiences with women in the U.S. that I had been writing about, were with Taiwanese-American girls. The mainland Chinese and Mexican women that I met later during my trips were complete polar opposites. Of course there are some counterexamples, but I definitely did see strong patterns (think of a bell curve).

It's not just because they're American, or Taiwanese, or just had personal issues, but maybe a combination of those factors.

If I ever do have the time and desire to visit Taiwan, I would be happy to test out your theory that Taiwanese women are far more unapproachable than Chinese women.

To be honest, I don't see much difference between Taiwanese American girls/Asian American girls and Taiwanese girls. Besides the American accent, they both have the same attitude and vibe. They are always busy, stingy with their time, don't like to flirt, don't give me the chance to get to know them, and at family reunions only exchange polite pleasantries and do not get close to me. They are both snobby and have the "I'm too good for you" attitude.

In fact, I would say that AA girls are a little more open minded and broad minded due to their Western education, whereas the typical young Taiwanese girl has no social skills, not much knowledge, and not much conversation skills, since she came from an environment where one just memorizes and memorizes to take tests, with no creative or critical thinking.

Winston wrote:To be honest, I don't see much difference between Taiwanese American girls/Asian American girls and Taiwanese girls. Besides the American accent, they both have the same attitude and vibe. They are always busy, stingy with their time, don't like to flirt, don't give me the chance to get to know them, and at family reunions only exchange polite pleasantries and do not get close to me.

In fact, I would say that AA girls are a little more open minded and broad minded due to their Western education, whereas the typical young Taiwanese girl has no social skills, not much knowledge, and not much conversation skills, since she came from an environment where one just memorizes and memorizes to take tests, with no creative or critical thinking.

Wow, really? As I have just added to my post above, "my past visits to Taiwan were when I was too young to be running around by myself and chatting up random people." So I really don't know how I would interact with women in Taiwan, how approachable they are, and what kinds of vibes they give off. But that is a very big statement, to say that Taiwanese women are the same as their American counterparts.

Winston, check out this thread that I had just started: Two ladies I had met in Yunnan, China. In your opinion, do you think Taiwanese women in general would ever be like them?

It would be interesting to have some input from Rock too.

Come-on Winston. You know deep down inside that you really do love Taiwan. Don't deny it anymore. You're a closet Taiwan lover and Janet Hseih expresses your sentiments perfectly. Now throw-up your arms and shout out at the the top of your lungs 10 times, "I love Taiwan!". Shout it out from the hills of Chiayi for all to hear. And make a video of that to put up here, lol.

Seriously, I'm sorry I can't offer u solutions. I have shown your photo to a few girls here and there in Taipei but none have been interested.

- Perhaps you can try to work on that Ali girl we met in Taichung. I remember that you found her to be quite attractive and I can give you her cellphone number and/or Facebook if you don't already have it. She seems very nice and has contacted me a couple times. But she's not very intellectual.

- Also, do you want me to try calling that girl in the add your forwarded me yesterday during her working hours tonight?

There are some reasons (excuses in your book) why Taiwan is not a good HA destination for you personally as far as dating goes:


1. You are past early 30s while most eligible girls you see out and are late teens/early 20s.

2. You are not white or black

3. You don't have long-term monogamous intentions

4. You don't have the patience or willingness to focus on one girl and work her hard over weeks and months

5. You are not slim and not willing to do what it takes to become slim

6. You spend most of your time in 'Taiwan's Appalachia' with local versions of characters from "Deliverance", lol.

7. According to my ex, the way you speak Taiwanese sounds like an 'a bei', lol.

The best advice Momopi and I have ever given you is to cut-your losses and move-on. Just because Taiwan may work for some doesn't mean it will for you.

I hope your mentor can help you get through your laundry list so you can focus on your 3 main objectives.

- What's an "a bei"? (This is due to my "waishengren" roots, as I have 100% fluency in Mandarin but 0% in Taiwanese.)

- You might want to rethink #2. I've also watched a YouTube video where a Taiwanese-American guy in his 20's, who speaks very little Mandarin, reports being popular with the girls in Taiwan. He had some pictures of himself posing with multiple Taiwanese women. However, he suspects it's because of the fact that he's based in the money-rich US of A. I can't find the video now unfortunately.

Falcon wrote:

Winston wrote:To be honest, I don't see much difference between Taiwanese American girls/Asian American girls and Taiwanese girls. Besides the American accent, they both have the same attitude and vibe. They are always busy, stingy with their time, don't like to flirt, don't give me the chance to get to know them, and at family reunions only exchange polite pleasantries and do not get close to me.

In fact, I would say that AA girls are a little more open minded and broad minded due to their Western education, whereas the typical young Taiwanese girl has no social skills, not much knowledge, and not much conversation skills, since she came from an environment where one just memorizes and memorizes to take tests, with no creative or critical thinking.

Wow, really? As I have just added to my post above, "my past visits to Taiwan were when I was too young to be running around by myself and chatting up random people." So I really don't know how I would interact with women in Taiwan, how approachable they are, and what kinds of vibes they give off. But that is a very big statement, to say that Taiwanese women are the same as their American counterparts.

Winston, check out this thread that I had just started: Two ladies I had met in Yunnan, China. In your opinion, do you think Taiwanese women in general would ever be like them?

It would be interesting to have some input from Rock too.

Falcon, it's very relative to the guy. For example, my tenant Monkro came to Taipei 6 months ago and has spent a total of 4 months here (took a 2 month break in States to plan for long term move here). He's mid 30s, shortish, dark complected Indian ancestry, stylish and decent looking. Here's how his experience with American women contrasts with those in Taipei

- USA: approached many thousands over more than a decade, got shot-down rudely countless times and was rejected flatly on almost all other approaches, got virtually no action except with a small handful of foreigner FOB type women.

- Taiwan: cold approached about 90, achieved 16 pearls (friendships). From those, he worked them over the weeks and whittled them down to 8. He's been on multiple dates with a few of them, is quite close with 3, and has scored total intimacy with one on multiple occasions. In fact, she is angling hard to become his gf but he still wants to play the field a while longer. These girls are mostly early to late 20s, cute or better, and most very much his type.

Falcon wrote:- What's an "a bei"? (This is due to my "waishengren" roots, as I have 100% fluency in Mandarin but 0% in Taiwanese.)

- You might want to rethink #2. I've also watched a YouTube video where a Taiwanese-American guy in his 20's, who speaks very little Mandarin, reports being popular with the girls in Taiwan. He had some pictures of himself posing with multiple Taiwanese women. However, he suspects it's because of the fact that he's based in the money-rich US of A. I can't find the video now unfortunately.

Falcon, you sure don't have to be white or black. But it helps cus there are certain girls here who are just into foreigners. It factors into the total handicap I often talk about for various countries. For example, my French tenant managed to quickly attract away a Taiwan girl from her much better looking and taller local bf of his same age.

Taiwan is different in this regard from China. In Taiwan (esp. Taipei), majority of girls are foreign neutral, a decent percentage are foreign (white, black, or both) positive, but foreign negative percentage is very small I believe.

Mainland Chinese tend to be much more nationalistic and full of residents who are proud of their identity (at least in first and second tier cities I've been to). So a much higher percentage of girls there are foreign negative whereas foreign positive ones are a much smaller percentage.

Thanks, I agree it is relative to the guy. I am also of the opinion that Mexico is highly relative to the guy. Some threads on HA about Mexico have reported little to no luck with Mexican women, while others (like mine) are at the other end of the spectrum. It's very hard to tell unless one actually visits the place.

Same goes for the various parts of China. Keep in mind that rural southwestern China, rural northeastern China, Guangzhou, and Beijing all feel like different countries, so even saying "China" would be generalizing too much.

Rural southwestern China would be much more foreign-negative, though I get good reception from the women there. To them, I am not really foreign despite my foreign nationality. Guangzhou is the most foreign-positive.

Falcon wrote:- What's an "a bei"? (This is due to my "waishengren" roots, as I have 100% fluency in Mandarin but 0% in Taiwanese.)

- You might want to rethink #2. I've also watched a YouTube video where a Taiwanese-American guy in his 20's, who speaks very little Mandarin, reports being popular with the girls in Taiwan. He had some pictures of himself posing with multiple Taiwanese women. However, he suspects it's because of the fact that he's based in the money-rich US of A. I can't find the video now unfortunately.

By 'a bei' she meant he sounded like someone from her dad's generation, out of touch with current colloquialisms and manners of speech. Also, she said he sounded hickish cus she's used to northern style Taiwanese.

In Taipei City, virtually all young people you see out and about in trendier areas seem to speak solely in Mandarin. Just speaking in Taiwanese at all can make you suspect, lol.