Happier Abroad Forum Community

I mean, people going out with the specific objective to get as pissed and wankered as possible. Sod socialising, sod mingling, sod being able to have a good dance, sod being in a fit state to converse. This seems to be the mentality of a lot of people locally. The idea that one needs to be pissed out one's face to have a good time? I mean, come on now, that's just rubbish. Get as drunk as possible at all costs. You know people with that mentality? I never can understand it.

Why is it, that in my area, or as many guys have complained on here, in England, people don't usually start to even open up until they are halfway gone. I mean come on.

Sometimes when I go out, you see people falling over, staggering, on the verge of vomiting and so forth before 11pm.

Friday and saturday nights, you have a choice of either this, or being shut-up at home when you really want to socialise, but not that kind of socialising. Anyone know what I mean? You really want to be socialising, but not with semi-alcoholics, and not in an environment infested with piss-heads (I'm talking places where people are falling over by 11pm), that's highly stressful.

When I went to Amsterdam recently, I did something I never would have dreamed of doing locally, going into pubs on my own and talking to randoms. Why? Because it was FAR LESS INTIMIDATING (there was also the anonymity factor playing a part too, since I live in a small town, so I didn't have the everyone knows everyone thing to worry about, but that's another topic).

It seems that locally, the only cohort you see patronising the town centre is the one that wants to down as many shots as possible, and it seems to me that that's the ONLY cohort ALMOST EVERYWHERE caters to. Talk about lowest common denominator. Bloody liquid versions of McDonolds, nothing but shifting as many pints of pisswater and shots as possible. I mean come on now? Is that how we really create a vibrant nightlife? Catyering exclusively to ONE COHORT, at the expense of all others? Chav lads and slags, that's all you see and all you meet.

I know that the bar scene has been ranted about extensively, and I'm happy that many people feel the same as I do, but my point is, why do people feel that they have to be pissed (I don't mean a simple bit of Dutch courage, I mean slurring, unable to stand properly) to socialise or have a good time? I hate the working class English mentality. Why do they feel they have to reach that state? That's not my idea of fun.

I like to have have quality conversations, have good company, maybe have a bit of a dance later in the night, not be in an environment where everyone's in their own little cliques with no other objective than to get as drunk as possible.

I've tried to chat to strangers trying to start convo around themes such as how their night's going, whether they're having a good time and the rest of it, and on more than one occasion, some have replied 'I'm not drunk enough'.

f***ing hell, I've had enough of this shitty town, I'm glad I'm doing some environment work in the Pyrenees this august. Everyone here looks like they've been slapped round the face with rotten fish when they're sober, or else they have severe social anxiety or anger management issues.

I have a local couchsurfing group in a city called Bournemouth 1 hour away by both train and car. It's a city with many language schools and a university. The CS community there is pretty vibrant. I semi-regularly go there. The quality of people and social contact over there is billions of times superior than what I meet locally. In fact, the dichotomy between the quality is so extreme, I'm willing to cycle 20+ minutes my end to the station, 10+ minutes at the other end at night in shitty weather.

It's so nice to get away from that horrible working class mentality and meet new and INTERESTING people, as well as approachable, friendly women.

+1

It is not as much the amount of liquor as it is people's attitudes.

When I was in rural Costa Rica I went into a whole part of town getting wasted before Semana Santa. Hell, I have seen people passed out face first on the pavement but when they wake up they are still pretty nice to me. They got hammered to have a fun time.

As you have noted in the UK, I have noted Americans getting drunk and more and more obnoxious. They get hammered because they are uptight and miserable.

I also ran into two women that had a drink but then started preaching this holier than thou tripe about how God doesn't want you to get wasted. Texas has a lot of holier than thou religious nuts.

Temprano26 wrote:+1

It is not as much the amount of liquor as it is people's attitudes.

When I was in rural Costa Rica I went into a whole part of town getting wasted before Semana Santa. Hell, I have seen people passed out face first on the pavement but when they wake up they are still pretty nice to me. They got hammered to have a fun time.

As you have noted in the UK, I have noted Americans getting drunk and more and more obnoxious. They get hammered because they are uptight and miserable.

Americans may be bad, but there is nothing worse than a pack of drunk Brits on holiday.

On a related note, why do people have to go to bars and clubs where the music is so loud that you can't even hear yourself talk?

I also don't understand this. What is the fun and pleasure of getting drunk? Are these people's lives so miserable and depressed that being drunk is better than being sober? If so, that's a very sad state of affairs when a sober existence is too depressing to face.

Why don't these people turn to spirituality, meditation or Buddhism to deal with their suffering instead?

Anglosphere men have to sublimate to withstand the numerical lack of quality well-mannered women.

It makes for a change of pace. Being somewhat drunk all the time is of course the norm for Eurasian men. This sobriety thing will go down in history as a bizarre cult.

Winston, the fact is that getting wasted is a lot easier than finding real solutions. A lot of these same people find it easier to tear someone else down than to pick themselves up.

For meeting women....bars and clubs can be the worst places. In many places, women are turned off by guys who drink as they were beat up by their fruitcake ex hubby or BF who was a drunk. Some of my friends can only talk to women when they are drunk but then have no filter. I'm petrified of a DUI, so i seldom drink. When all the guys are drunk and chest thumping, i'm getting the girls with a real personality, charm and wit...lol

Not to mention the expense...

Enticer wrote: In many places, women are turned off by guys who drink as they were beat up by their fruitcake ex hubby or BF who was a drunk.l

If anything that would tend to turn them on.

Not all AW want beat up or abused

I don't understand why here, people's idea of 'socialising' is to get wasted. Sure, I can understand having a pint or two to free-up any initial nerves but drinking to the point where your performance declines and you start to feel sick? What's the fun in that?

What I don't understand, is why people feel the need to 'pre-load', if you've heard the term. Getting half-wasted BEFORE even going out. If done to save money, it suggests that the sole aim of going out is to get pissed.

In my town, one thing I can't stand is this. Many of the bars are totally DEAD until 11 or midnight. A lot of them cater EXCLUSIVELY to that cohort. Is that what you call VIBRANT? I think not.

Typical English working-class escapist mentality.

When I went to Amsterdam, it was still possible to find places with a more chilled environment between 8 and 10, with people sitting, casually chatting, as opposed to trying to get as wasted as possible on shots or any of that shit.

You guys are right, it must be escapism. I think that deep down, a lot of people locally are probably very alone and are probably either trying to escape, or to fit-in (because they're lonely?).

More than likely they are escaping from reality. Outside of that, they probably don't want to bother with many other activities that require coherent and deep thoughts. A whole lot easier to chug as much alcohol as you can and barely remember half the stupid crap you did the previous night.