Happier Abroad Forum Community

Every year in the first half of the month of August an international folklore festival of dance is held in the otherwise non-descript town of Billingham in the northeast corner of England, a place which also happens to be my hometown. Given that tiny Billingham is an otherwise highly homogeneous town in terms of ethnic makeup, the arrival of people from all four corners of the earth adds an oddly incongruent element of colour and excitement to the otherwise Stalinist grey concrete backdrop. Furthermore, this backdrop affords one the opportunity to compare women from differing cultures, with the most glaring contrast being between women from the non-Western hemisphere and the local female demograpic.

One such salient difference I've noticed is in the facial expressions and demeanour of foreign women. Firstly, non-Western women, such as the dancers from Colombia that I observed walking around the town yesterday, did not avert their glances away from me when I entered into their immediate vicinity. Furthermore, not only do they seem to have an interest in the people that are around them, but one of them actually smiled at me as she was passing, which would have been inconceivalbe had she been a local, with the stock response of local women being either to look down at the ground when passing a man of her or similar age or to flick her head quickly to the side and pretend like she is looking into a shop window. Secondly, I was struck by the warmth of the smiles that I saw around me. Remember, they were not on stage but merely walking around before or after a performance and did not have to affect any such thing. It also struck me forcibly how this warmth - a genuine smile where the eyes reflect a genuine depth of emotion and capacity for compassion - is something I have not witnessed with a woman in my age range from the Anglosphere for a long while and seeing other women behave like this reminded me how much Anglo women have lost in recent years, not just in terms of classical femininity, but even in terms of basic humanity, with their social media-fuelled solipsistic mindset which likes nothing better than to avoid all contact with anybody but those in their immediate social clique. Finally, the male dancers from overseas I noticed also behaved significantly different to the local men when going about their business between being on stage - they didnn't slouch when walking, seemed much more confident and collected and the dynamic between them and their female dancing partners seemed to be much more respectful on the female side, in a way that I find rather hard to describe in words here.

Curiously, though, I was confronted this morning with a completely different scenario as a group of dancers were alighting from a coach which was parked in the centre of town. As I moved closer towards it, a group of young women - around the age of early 20s - decked out in their dancing rags came towards me and there was a noticably different and more toxic vibe to their demeanour, which seemed to me curiously reminiscent of the local English women. As I took a closer look at them, more than one of their number stared at me with that now all-too-familiar bitch scowl and one of them even screwed up her face as if to mentally reprimend me for having the temerity to look in her direction. My immediate reaction was to think that they must be the British contingent in the festival, until I checked online and found that there was no other group from the Anglosphere except from the USA. After hearing the American accent of one of the guys accompanying them I had my confirmation and all the dominoes fell into place for me.

One thing these encounters I've had over the past couple of days have made aware is that there is an inherent abuse, albeit a low grade one, in the behaviour of British and other women from the Anglophere in their everyday interactions with men on the street. This abuse assumes the form of a perpetual disrespect towards men, through a refusal to even look in their direction, let alone signal any recognition as to the presence of them, such as with a smile or even any eye contact whatsoever. This maladjusted behaviour strikes me as serving the purpose of self-validation more than anything else, since by the woman pre-emptively averting her gaze, she thereby automatically reinforces a power relationshiop of supplicant-master with the male in her presence, thus placing herself on a pedestal as being the one that is, in her eyes, highly coveted and making clear that it is always within her power to confer recognition by duly withholding it. It's akin to a child stamping on bumble bees to prove that he is the stronger party and should be called for what it is: a toxic and sick form of behaviour that I fear has now become so well-established that many men, especially the younger guys on here without much experience of interacting with non-Western women, don't even recognize as being toxic and disrespectful. But imagine that, every time an old person started making small talk at the bus stop with you, you would deliberately walk several paces away from them and, when they did try to engage you in conversation, I would turn my back and simply ignore them. Now ask yourself what effect would this have over time on the person on the receiving end? Yet this is the equivalent behaviour of women these days in the UK towards their male peers and in other parts of the Anglosphere such as the US and Canada.

Incidentally, I'm not just referring to random strangers passing by on the street here, but even with neighbours that have been living side by side for years. For example, there's a young woman who lives in my street that I forwarded a parcel to one morning after she was not at home and the postman had left the package with me. About a week later, I passed this woman on the street and her reaction was to completely ignore me by looking down at the ground as I approached her in the opposite direction, despite the favour that I had done her and the fact that I was perfectly civil towards her when I handed her the parcel. The point to take away here is that this behaviour is far from the exception but rather the rule: The women here are extremely averse to any contact with men outside of their immediately social circle and will look visibly annoyed if you even attempt to make eye contact with them, let alone say hello to them. It is only after interacting with women from outside of the UK, especially outside of the Western hemisphere, that I have come to realize how truly toxic Anglo women have become in public.

Has anybody else on here also noticed this? Or, for that matter, had the opportunity to compare Anglo women with foreign women side by side?

It’s nothing I didn’t already know about, but it’s an interesting thing to see in action. The point you mentioned about the subtlety of their little disses and dismissals is true; it’s so normalized in Anglo cultural behavior that you may not notice it even if you know it exists (or at least not appreciate it to its fullest extent) until you see something different.

When I was in Croatia and Bosnia last month, it really sank in. They’re friendly countries, but they are not smiley. People tend to look stoic and bitchy, seemingly just like home, but then I realized that I could pick Americans out with almost unerring accuracy (I did mis-peg a few Aussies though). Some of it is how they carry themselves. It has been my experience that American women often walk like men. They also often have a style of dress that is pretty easy to pick out. But these things were far from guaranteed. What seemed to be true for all of them was something in their expression, a sort of practiced artificiality that made their faces look like masks. The expression that they wore didn’t matter. This has been written about semi-extensively, possibly even here, but I’ve never actually SEEN it before. When I went to Nepal, there were simply no Anglo women there that I didn’t know, and you can’t compare a white American woman to a Nepalese village girl laterally the way you can w a fit American and a fit Eastern European woman, as both are white and look fairly similar. The common word for it ‘bitchface’ doesn’t even tell the whole story. It’s like they’ve lost a fundamental aspect of being human.

There’s a weird quality to it. It isn’t even just warmth or approachability. You could have two women not paying attention to you, and 90% of the time you will be able to tell which one is Anglo and which one isn’t. One person will simply be ignoring you, while the other will seem as though she thinks acknowledging your existence will be taken as consent to rape her. Although I’m sure that some of their dismissive attitude and toxic vibes are simply their belief that they are forever royalty deigning to walk among slaves, thanks to the culture basically telling them this every day, I think a lot of it is fear. Not just fear of ‘being raped,’ but fear period. They have internalized the ineptitude that feminism has taught them they have, and so they fear any sort of interaction where they do not blatantly have the power in a way that is obvious to both parties (and when they do have the power, then often the OTHER side of this takes over…). Passing you on the street? You might assault them. Ignore that there’s 20 of them and one of you, and that even a bunch of girls could tear you apart easily with those odds. A similar thing to what you mentioned happened to me in Zagreb, which was having their ‘International Folklore Festival.’ I had interacted with some of the people from a few of the other groups the day before, but this day when I was headed to the center of town, I passed a group I didn’t recognize. Like 5 dudes (band members) and about 15 women of various ages. Even at a distance you could tell there was something different about them, and when I got close, they closed ranks. Not physically, but you could almost feel this sort of shrinking back. This was a big sidewalk, and it was just me and this other random average guy passing by them, plenty of room for everyone, and it was enough to provoke a reaction like they were passing by somebody who could order their execution. As I passed them, I saw that some of them were carrying little Canadian flags.

I see it everywhere now that I’m back, and honestly, unless they have been replaced by pod people in the time I was gone and that’s the reason I’m only noticing now, it’s kind of putting them in uncanny valley territory for me. It has really torpedoed their attractiveness for me, and maybe I’m even kind of understanding how some people in the manosphere, particularly in the PUA sector, start referring to AWs as though they are objects rather than people. When they look like fake humans, it’s surprisingly easy to depersonalize them.

Incidentally, I feel like this makes hitting on them EASIER, but...at the moment I can't even muster the desire to. It's really a trip.