Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating scene

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fightforlove
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by fightforlove »

GoingAwol wrote:
jamesbond wrote:
GoingAwol wrote:I've been pondering the reasons why so many men can't get dates or sex in America and I think the main reason is introversion/shyness. Sure, there are undoubtedly men who struggle to get women because of other reasons, but I think this is the biggest factor for most men that are perpetually single. The reason being is America is an extremely extroverted society and it's every man for himself in the dating scene. Just a few decades ago shy men had social safety nets in place to meet women, but not anymore. If you are a shy/introverted man in America you are sh*t out of luck if you aren't exceptionally good looking.
It's sad but true, America is a country filled with extroverts and women love extroverts because they are seen as more masculine than shy guys are.
Jamesbond,
one of the things I've noticed is people in America don't introduce people to each other anymore. Based off of what i've heard from my family and other older people it seems that most people in the older generations would meet boyfriends/girlfriends via introductions from friends and family. Just try to imagine how much easier it would have been for shy men to meet women back in those days. You didn't have to cold approach women at clubs or crowded parties because you could be set up by friends and family and connect with them one on one in non-threatening settings. That stuff just doesn't exist anymore... It's every man for himself.
Good points. Two generations ago, shy/awkward and also less physically attractive men had more social safety nets to guarantee them some decent marriage prospects. People met through very organic social circles with people very similar to them, at churches, neighborhood socials, parties and straight-up date arrangements through friends, parents, cousins, coworkers... Working-class Americans married their high school girlfriend or girl next door introduced by their parents who attended the same church. Upper-class Americans also met their spouses through social arrangements or at greek/sorority socials on university campuses. I believe many people in the baby boomer generation met their spouses at college. Nowdays the majority of millennials are either just hooking up or living an introverted life of pizza and video games during college age. Decades ago, it also was not uncommon for older men in their 30s and even 40s-50s to be introduced and married to younger brides in their 20s and even teens. Wasn't it Ty Cobb's father who remarried in his 40s to a 12 year old?

I think it today's dating climate, you have to be more independently proactive, which by default, makes dating more Darwinian. The social fabric of unity via family/church/neighborhood has waned over the years, making attributes like social charisma (this includes Game) and good looks all the more important. I think a lot of young women nowdays are distracted with all the options of this very wide-open dating ecosystem, and shy/introvert males are at a marked disadvantage.
Eric
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Eric »

GoingAwol wrote:I've been pondering the reasons why so many men can't get dates or sex in America and I think the main reason is introversion/shyness. Sure, there are undoubtedly men who struggle to get women because of other reasons, but I think this is the biggest factor for most men that are perpetually single. The reason being is America is an extremely extroverted society and it's every man for himself in the dating scene. Just a few decades ago shy men had social safety nets in place to meet women, but not anymore. If you are a shy/introverted man in America you are sh*t out of luck if you aren't exceptionally good looking.

It's f***ing feminism. That's it. It's not complicated people.


Watch this video and get some long lost common (male) sense back into you: red pill -


[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5TEEcu4JKA[/youtube]
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
Nailer
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Nailer »

I went to a coffee shop today that was pretty full.

I did not see ONE occurrence of a person talking outside of their group (i.e. didn't go to elementary school with them).

Were they ALL "introverted"? 100% of them?

It's like this EVERY DAY. So EVERYONE is "flawed"? EVERYONE in the U.S. is "introverted"? :roll:

No. f**k this bullshit. You cannot have friends, have fun, and have relationships in the U.S. because everyone is scared of their own shadow. Everyone's miserable, but no one will even address it because even admitting this makes you a social pariah. (WTF? You don't have a large circle of frenemies you have kept in contact with since high school?!! Loser!!!)
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jamesbond
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by jamesbond »

Nailer wrote:I went to a coffee shop today that was pretty full.

I did not see ONE occurrence of a person talking outside of their group (i.e. didn't go to elementary school with them).

Were they ALL "introverted"? 100% of them?

It's like this EVERY DAY. So EVERYONE is "flawed"? EVERYONE in the U.S. is "introverted"? :roll:

No. f**k this bullshit. You cannot have friends, have fun, and have relationships in the U.S. because everyone is scared of their own shadow. Everyone's miserable, but no one will even address it because even admitting this makes you a social pariah. (WTF? You don't have a large circle of frenemies you have kept in contact with since high school?!! Loser!!!)
Exactly, this is what Winston has been saying for years, in the US it's very hard to break into already established social circles.

Most people in the US make their friends early in life (grade school, high school and college). Once you are out of school, forget about it. :roll:
"When I think about the idea of getting involved with an American woman, I don't know if I should laugh .............. or vomit!"

"Trying to meet women in America is like trying to decipher Egyptian hieroglyphics."
Adama
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Adama »

Nailer wrote:I went to a coffee shop today that was pretty full.

I did not see ONE occurrence of a person talking outside of their group (i.e. didn't go to elementary school with them).

Were they ALL "introverted"? 100% of them?

It's like this EVERY DAY. So EVERYONE is "flawed"? EVERYONE in the U.S. is "introverted"? :roll:

No. f**k this bullshit. You cannot have friends, have fun, and have relationships in the U.S. because everyone is scared of their own shadow. Everyone's miserable, but no one will even address it because even admitting this makes you a social pariah. (WTF? You don't have a large circle of frenemies you have kept in contact with since high school?!! Loser!!!)

Many if not most friendships with men are based around carousing and reveling. That is, drinking together and partying. Or it is about chasing women or bragging about sexual conquests.

If you're lucky your friendship is based upon a mutual activity you both like, such as playing sports.

But if your "friends" are jealous of you, they're going to backstab you every chance they get, and whisper against you behind your back.

I used to hang out with some guys from my area. I was driving them around, had one pretty blond girl in the back seat, and this guy who was my friend was telling her not to go with me because, "He's weird." She didn't talk to me much due to his warning. (He later stopped hanging out with her when she got fat, according to his own admission.)

I'm driving these characters around, and I'm asking which way to turn, being unfamiliar with the area. The dude who wants me to take him places tells me I should know which way is east and which way is west, implying that he shouldn't have to give me directions.

Truthfully I don't have the patience for most people.

I had other guys I met in a class, added them to my "MySpace", which I had just joined myself. Then when I see the two of them again, the one guy says in front of me to the other, "We're the only two people on there, you know!"

The number of your friends is a badge of honor, a signal of worthiness. It's your sign of approval, that you are a welcomed member of the fraternity of friendship. Without this key, you are barred from entry.

And within whichever clique or friendship group you're in, there is thought enforcement. You better think, act and speak just like them, or once again, they'll insult and revile you, until you submit or leave.
Adama
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Adama »

jamesbond wrote:
Nailer wrote: (WTF? You don't have a large circle of frenemies you have kept in contact with since high school?!! Loser!!!)
Exactly, this is what Winston has been saying for years, in the US it's very hard to break into already established social circles.

Most people in the US make their friends early in life (grade school, high school and college). Once you are out of school, forget about it. :roll:
Once you get to know most people you wouldn't be interested in being friends with them anyway. Many people just say openly disrespectful, hurtful things, even to their friends.
Nomad
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Nomad »

GoingAwol wrote:I've been pondering the reasons why so many men can't get dates or sex in America and I think the main reason is introversion/shyness. Sure, there are undoubtedly men who struggle to get women because of other reasons, but I think this is the biggest factor for most men that are perpetually single. The reason being is America is an extremely extroverted society and it's every man for himself in the dating scene. Just a few decades ago shy men had social safety nets in place to meet women, but not anymore. If you are a shy/introverted man in America you are sh*t out of luck if you aren't exceptionally good looking.
Shyness doesn't really serve anyone well in general. Just not the dating scene. Tell me a moment or a event where shyness benefits you?

Also, good looking men will always have the edge over non-looking good men. That just means you got to act like a Cuttle Fish.

If you don't know, weak males during mating season cannot compete with stronger males physically. So you think natrually, the stronger males get to mate, and the weaker males are left without. That doesn't turn out to be the case. The weaker Cuttle Fish males, morph into females to by-pass the aggressive males, then go to the female and slip their sperm into her.

Then Scientists did a DNA count and what they find is the females use more of the weaker cuttle fishs sperm over the stronger ones, showing that females apt more for Intellectual Strength than just Physical Strength.
Nailer
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Nailer »

In America, "shy" people are men who seek to make new friends. "Extroverts" prefer to stick with the safety of their childhood friends.

Up is down, down is up, and everything is mad.
Eric
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Eric »

I think it has more to do with how big of a fool you are, how deceived etc. Nobody has a work ethic anymore...Every ones busy thinking about sex.

I understand this extrovertedness Every one is talking about...but Look I see that as just a ploy a distraction to cause people to follow stupidity.
They could, the media, make it popular to eat turds with sex and people would do it. That's funny how it seems the things which are distracting towards building a better life, are made popular here.
Its evil. Understand no ones like that - that's everyone trying to be like that. Those people aren't happy, those that are acting.

Don't be deceived people, this nation is trying to deceive you.
To get sex you have to be open to it,,as above so below that's it. Most guys want a chick to just give it to them...it doesn't work like that. You have to be just as open to it.
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
Eric
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Re: Shy/introverted men suffer the most in the U.S dating sc

Post by Eric »

Do you want a family and a nice life, or a player lifestyle - anyone can be anything. Adopt an attitude...

Its what you're beliefs are, what you're willing to trade. Understand most of these extroverts are very f***ed, oulless people, drugs, jail...charges, irresponsibility, hanging on by the tail of life, do you really want to be like that? Do you want to be a complete mess.

then be like that. Understand your choices, these people have given up, thrown all to the wind, often they come from broken homes......they are messed up, you want to be like that?

Understand there are different types of people. You want something, shoot for it...you'll achieve it.
Its not a solid life...why do you think so many crash and burn in "The American Dream". I mean haven't there been movies made about it.
You have to risk everything. I don't see many on here who are ready or willing to risk.
Misery and happiness are only states of mind.
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