A Day in the Life of an American Girl

Discuss what's wrong with American women. Share problems, experiences and stories about them and why they suck so bad that you've had to resort to dating abroad and foreign women.

Moderators: fschmidt, jamesbond

Post Reply
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2012
Joined: June 11th, 2011, 1:26 am

A Day in the Life of an American Girl

Post by Banano »

A Typical Tuesday

By Law Dogger

Stupid alarm clock. “What time is it?â€￾ Becky mumbled to herself as she laid on her bed, her cat Ariel right next to her. She moved the six pillows around until she found her Iphone 5 and hit the snooze. She couldn’t fall back asleep, however, so she got up and started getting ready for work. She put her hair in a bun, put on her jeans, tanktop, and Converse shoes and headed into work. Becky was a marketing manager at a mid-size company in LA. She stuffed a Cliff Bar in her purse and grabbed a bottle of water as she headed to her Jetta parked outside.

Once in the car, she took her birth control pill and started driving to work. On the way she checked her text messages. A few random numbers she didn’t recognize from the weekend had texted her last night but she had already fallen asleep. One guy proposed dinner. “How creepy!â€￾ she thought to herself. She immediately texted her best friend Alexa and told her how the guy from the bar wanted to take her to dinner. Alexa responded “Ewwww, next!â€￾ Becky laughed as she pulled into the parking lot of her office.

She went inside and grabbed a donut and coffee from the kitchen before settling in at her desk. Yesterday she had taken an intense “cardio-fitâ€￾ class at her local gym. Before getting into her breakfast, she took a picture of the donut and coffee and put it on Facebook. “Work hard play hard! Nothing like a little treat for my hard workout yesterday :)â€￾ She threw her Iphone to her side and started making some calls for work.

A few minutes later, her boss came by to ask how she was, because she had taken a “personal dayâ€￾ yesterday. Becky quickly replied “Oh I’m fine, you know just women issues.â€￾ In reality Becky was just hungover from partying all weekend. Nonetheless, this made her boss back off quickly and he told her he was happy she was back and reminded her of some meeting the next day.

Becky grabbed her phone to text Alexa about her boss’s rude comments but saw some notifications from Facebook which, of course, Becky had to see. Thirteen likes, one comment on the donut picture! Becky was happy, though really she didn’t know why. She checked the comment, it was her friend Melissa who exclaimed “As if you can’t afford to treat yourself! Bitch lol.â€￾ Becky was a size 6, and enrolled in the gym to get some of that flab off. But seeing Melissa’s comment (size 12) made her wonder if she really needed to go to the gym after all. Whatever, Becky thought, it’s just one donut.

Right as she was about to get back to work, she remembered she was going to text Alexa. She grabbed her Iphone and texted Alexa about her boss reminding her of a meeting right after she told him about her personal day. Alexa quickly responded, “what an ass!â€￾ And because girls cannot put all their thoughts into one text, a string of replies quickly came telling Becky that “You should quit your job, f**k that guy.â€￾ Next, Alexa told Becky she should just marry rich and “end it lol.â€￾ Becky responded “I know right? I’ve got time though, I’ll find my Ryan Gosling ;)â€￾ Becky was 30.

Work went along slowly, with Becky checking her phone every few minutes. She went to lunch with Charles who worked in her same department. Charles really liked Becky, in a sexual manner. They went to the cafe downstairs and Becky got a Cobb salad, dressing on the side to be healthy, a brownie and a diet coke. Charles offered to pay for lunch, but Becky said she could pay for herself. They sat down and started to eat. Becky told Charles all about the random guys texting her from the weekend and how creepy they were. Charles agreed: “Seriously, how rude of those guys to think they can just ask you out for dinner after just meeting you!â€￾ “You have no idea Charles, these guys are just weird,â€￾ Becky disgustingly stated as she finished the entire dressing despite it being on the side. As they were leaving, Charles asked Becky what she’s doing that night, if she would like to join him out for a movie. His original plan was dinner, but after Becky’s comments he had to improvise. “That’s so sweet, but I already have plans. Maybe another time.â€￾ Becky had no plans…yet.

That reminded Becky, it’s Tuesday night tonight…Taco Tuesdays? Wine night with the girls? What should we do!? She texted her core group of girls on what they wanted to do that night. All of them already had plans. “Whatever,â€￾ Becky wrote Alexa, “I’ll just respond to one of these guys who texted me last night.â€￾ She scrolled through the texts and chose the guy who offered dinner, because she didn’t have any food at home and was too lazy to go to the grocery store. She texted the dinner guy at 4:03 p.m., roughly 16 hours after he texted her the night before. He responded at 4:05 p.m., stating “Sounds great! I’ll meet you at the restaurant.â€￾ A date was set.

Becky went home after work, and when she walked in saw Ariel curled up on her pillow on the couch. “Soooooooooo cute!â€￾ Becky exclaimed with glee. “I need to put this on instagramâ€￾ she thought. She sat next to Ariel, made a duck face and took a picture with her Iphone. Uploaded it and went to shower and change for dinner. She put on another pair of jeans, flip flops (but with studded rhinestones), and a slightly tighter tank top relative to her work one, but still loose given her size. When she showed up at the restaurant, roughly 15 minutes late, dinner guy was already there with a table waiting. She sat down across from him, said she was sorry for being late as they started chatting. “Hmmâ€￾ she thought, this guy is not as lame as I thought. They ordered some appetizers and drinks.

Despite her initial interest, after about 30 minutes or so Becky got bored with the conversation and slyly took her phone out of her purse. “One secondâ€￾ she told dinner guy. “Just need to take care of something real quick.â€￾ “Go ahead,â€￾ dinner guy said. She checked her Instagram, seven likes for her cat picture. Kind of low, she thought. She checked her phone’s internet connection to make sure it was working and it was. “Whatever, people are probably out to dinner or something,â€￾ she rationalized. Just as she was about to put her phone away, she got a text from Rick. Rick was someone she met two months ago at a bar and ended up going home with that night. Rick f***ed her pretty good, and simply texted her at nights for a booty call when he has nothing to do. “whats upâ€￾ said the text, with no capitalization or punctuation. She quickly responded, “At dinner with a friend! Kind of bored, what are you doing? :)â€￾ She left her phone out on the table.

Dinner guy finally got some attention again, and started chatting about his work and what she does for work, if she is close with her family, and so on. Becky responded to all his questions, but kept one eye on her phone. “Come on!â€￾ she screamed in her head. “Why the hell doesn’t Rick text me back? He always f***ing does this!â€￾ She kept smiling the entire time at dinner guy however, completely keeping him none the wiser that her mind was elsewhere. After another 45 minutes, she decided to herself “That’s it, I’m done with Rick. I had enough of his shit.â€￾ They ordered another round of drinks and now Becky was getting a little buzzed. 30 minutes later, the waiter brought the bill to the table. Right as he put the bill down, Becky’s phone vibrated. It was Rick. He texted Becky “nothing, come over if you want.â€￾ She excused herself to the bathroom and once there Becky angrily texted Rick “what took you so long to respond??!! Not sure if I can make it anymore.â€￾ Rick responded back, “yes or no, make a decision.â€￾ Becky without hesitation, responded “K I’ll be there in 30.â€￾

She went back to the table and dinner guy had already paid the bill. As they were getting up, he suggested a drink at the bar next door. Becky convincingly hesitated for a second, and said, “You know I have to get up early, I have this fitness class I need to go to before work. I shouldn’t skip it.â€￾ “Sure, another time,â€￾ dinner guy responded. He walked Becky to her car, gave her a kiss on the cheek and watched her drive away.

Fifteen minutes later, she was at Rick’s apartment. He opened the door in a tshirt and shorts and sat back on the couch watching TV. Ten minutes later, they were having sex. They both fell asleep after, and Becky woke up around 2:00 a.m. to drive home. When she got home, she got on her MacBook Air and pulled up the gym’s website to cancel the fitness class. She grabbed Ariel and plopped her cat next to her, set her alarm and got ready to pass out. Laying in bed, she thought about her day and her life in general. “Melissa was right,â€￾ she thought, “I don’t need to get into better shape.â€￾ After all, Rick just f***ed her, dinner guy was all over her, she had several guys texting her and her coworker Charles keeps asking her out. “I’m just fine :)â€￾


Special Offer! FREE 6 Month Membership on ForeignWomen.com! Sign up here.

Meet Foreign Women Now! Post your FREE profile on Happier Abroad Personals and start receiving messages from gorgeous Foreign Women today!

Experienced Poster
Posts: 1536
Joined: June 20th, 2012, 8:33 pm
Location: Somewhere out in the American West (for now)

Post by zacb »

Very relevant .
The Daily Agorist, Learn to Live Independent of the System! http://www.theagoristreview.blogspot.com
Junior Poster
Posts: 564
Joined: May 10th, 2013, 11:23 pm
Location: Bangkok, Thailand

Post by anamericaninbangkok »

zacb wrote:Very relevant .
I'll take the good ole days when women knew to keep their f***ing mouths shut and there was none of this women's lib SHIT or f***ing feminism. I'll back Sean Connery up on his comment about a women needing a smack once in a while too. What most women forget, and they shouldn't, is they need to have a little respect for me. Men, at least the ones I hang out with, are generally bigger, badder, meaner, tougher, and hit a helluva lot harder. If that's not a good reason to at least show a man a modicum of respect, I don't know what is. Of course, they'll smack a guy and if he hits her back, she'll call the cops. That's they way it works nowadays.

For the record, if I ever got divorced, it would be a ho only diet. I don't think I could deal with some of the bullshit that goes on these days.
Veteran Poster
Posts: 2500
Joined: November 12th, 2010, 11:01 am

Post by S_Parc »

anamericaninbangkok wrote:For the record, if I ever got divorced, it would be a ho only diet. I don't think I could deal with some of the bullshit that goes on these days.
Even George Soros, a multi-BILLIONAIRE, has taken the plunge for the 3rd time and with an American woman.

http://www.reuters.com/article/2013/09/ ... XZ20130920

I'm not anywhere close to a billionaire and if I were in my 80s with that much bankroll, there's zippo chance of me getting marriage. Some guys never learn.
Many years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
User avatar
Elite Upper Class Poster
Posts: 8914
Joined: August 25th, 2007, 10:45 am
Location: USA

Post by jamesbond »

anamericaninbangkok wrote:I'll back Sean Connery up on his comment about a women needing a smack once in a while too. What most women forget, and they shouldn't, is they need to have a little respect for men.
Here is the interview where Sean Connery talks about slapping women.

"When I think about the idea of getting involved with an American woman, I don't know if I should laugh .............. or vomit!"

"Trying to meet women in America is like trying to decipher Egyptian hieroglyphics."
Freshman Poster
Posts: 168
Joined: June 11th, 2012, 6:37 am
Location: Malaysia

Post by Rayn »

What I find hilarious is that how the guys would go head over heels to try to get laid with a lazyass fatass attention whore like her - INCLUDING that alpha dude giving her the booty call. To say that these guys have no self-respect is an understatement.
Junior Poster
Posts: 958
Joined: July 7th, 2013, 2:41 pm

Post by SilverEnergy »

That's why you get an ASSET PROTECTION PLAN so that if anyone tries to sue you or divorce you, they won't get a penny in the form of child support or alimony and they won't get your car or house.
"Allow me to show you the Power Cosmic!" - Silver Surfer
Freshman Poster
Posts: 149
Joined: September 24th, 2014, 9:31 pm

Re: Day in the life of an American girl

Post by matthewcoury »

Freshman Poster
Posts: 149
Joined: September 24th, 2014, 9:31 pm

Post by matthewcoury »

i love the part about the duck face and the facebook crap
Elite Upper Class Poster
Posts: 7876
Joined: January 20th, 2009, 1:10 am
Location: Chiang Mai Thailand

Re: Day in the life of an American girl

Post by Jester »

matthewcoury wrote:
Banano wrote:
A Typical Tuesday

By Law Dogger......

very funny man ;) great satire and soooo true
Thanks for bumping this.

It is EPIC.
Post Reply
  • Similar Topics
    Last post

Return to “Anti-American Women Rants”