OzGuy wrote: ↑July 4th, 2021, 2:37 am
In terms of getting laid, you'll get roughly the same number of notches in Jakarta and Manila. These are probably the two easiest cities in the world to get laid.
HOWEVER, there is WAY more shit to sift through to get laid in Jakarta. Indonesian women (especially in Jakarta) are more intelligent than Filipinas, but they are a lot more bitchy. They will also ghost you a lot and just stop replying whereas this is much less common with Filipinas. Some Indonesian women are downright insulting, and many ask for "taxi money" to meet up. They are generally more gold-digging than Filipinas. I've never had a Filipina ask me for taxi money to meet.
Maybe it is the type of girl you are dating. I have never heard of an Indonesian woman asking for 'taxi money' except in cases that sound like basically prostitution. An expat buddy of mine would meet up with expat men in bars to do business deals. He said there was one he called the 'squeeze me' bar. If his wife was not available, he would take a female coworker, since the women there would not grope him if he were with a woman. The expat men would just grab the women, there, too, take them home, and send them away with 100,000 of taxi money, which was a lot of money back then but is probably like 400 or 500 thousand today for what it buys (or a few years ago when I was last there.) So maybe the semi-prostitutes and girls willing to sleep around there there are kind of argumentative or complaining.
My impression of Indonesians is that they are generally open and friendly. I am from the South, too, where Americans tend to be a bit more friendly. Indonesians are a bit more 'kaku'-- formal or 'stiff', but friendly. And there are lots of people-groups. Javanese tend to be friendly and demure.
I used to be under the impression that Indonesian women generally waited for marriage, and that may still be the case, but people lament the fact that fornication, purcabulan, is growing in the cities. Malaysians have the same concerns. I noticed in Jakarta when I was young and single that there were some girls that seemed really eager to meet me. I was looking for a wife, and a woman being too aggressive/desperate was a bit of a turn-off, especially when it seemed like so many of them took an interest in me that was a bit more subtle.
There are also certain women in Jakarta who are into expats. Some of them may be regular, nice girls. But there are also wanita nakal, naughty women, who are into expats. Their personalities might not reflect personalities of Indonesian women in general. It may be that the younger generation of women tend to be grumpier, and the many I interacted with at work were just nice to me because I was older and in a position of authority.
Indonesian women are far busier and most will only have time to meet you on weekends. There are a lot more career women here compared to the Philippines. Whereas in the Philippines a lot of women are unemployed or working in BPO call centers so they are much more available to meet. Due to the shift work of call centers, you'll find there is always a Filipina available any day, any time. There are a lot of prostitutes on tinder in Jakarta, but there are also a lot of ladyboys in Manila. So I guess it's about even in regards to the time-wasters.
A lot of Indonesians work long hours and it can take hours to get through Jakarta traffic, which makes it hard to do anything during the week. If you dated someone who passed by you on their route between home and work or in walking distance from their office for lunch, that might make more sense to them.
Indonesian women will NEVER give you a compliment. It seems that it's just not in their culture to do so (a few girls told me). Filipinas would frequently give me compliments, even sometimes on the street telling me how handsome I am.
When I was young and single, there were Indonesian women who told me I was good-looking.
You will never hear this from an Indonesian woman - they are actually more likely to insult you (e.g. call you ugly) than to ever give you a compliment. You have to have thick skin to deal with Indonesian women.
I do not remember an Indonesian woman ever calling me ugly, though I spent over a decade there throughout the years. You may need a thick skin for some things. If you gain weight if they have not seen you for a while, Indonesians will tell you look fatter. But they do not think of that as an insult. In the old days, being fatter might have been thought of as being healthier, having enough to eat, etc.
There was a coworker at one place I worked. The women heard he was coming back. When he'd worked there before, they all thought he was so good looking. One of them told me he was better looking than me. Then he came back to work, maybe in his late thirties after working there in his 20's, and the women commented on his not being as good-looking-- to his face. They knew him. He commented on how it was disheartening. So if they know you, they can be 'too honest'-- too forthright about what they think sometimes. But I never heard of them calling strangers ugly to their face. If one hit a woman up for sex, she might. I could imagine that.
Overall I MUCH prefer the personality and attitude of Filipinas by a large margin. Filipinas are just way more pleasant, polite, submissive, and open-minded. I find Indonesian women to be rather closed-minded, secretive, and paranoid. If you say something to upset a Filipina she will usually just go silent for a while. If you say something to upset or annoy an Indonesian woman, she will get very bitchy.
It probably depends on the 'tribe' in Indonesia. Some people-groups are more outspoken. But if you are dating the girl, I could see that happening. All of my time around Filippinos has been around expats in the US or Jakarta.
Filipinas are just a lot more fun and you see them smiling and laughing more. Indonesian women are much more serious and rarely joke around. There is also no language barrier with Filipinas as they speak fluent English.
I speak fluent Indonesian, so I don't have that big of a language barrier unless they shift into some regional language. But I have seen plenty of Indonesian women laughing and joking.
Indonesian food is much better than the food in the Philippines. I also find Indonesia to be a lot cheaper than the Philippines, especially accommodation.
I was speaking with a Filippina yesterday who had taught preschool in Jakarta, and she said Indonesian food is amazing. The food in the Philippines ranks low as an Asian cuisine. Pork, pork, more pork. Pork fat. It is kind of dull. Indonesia has a variety of food from various people groups and many of the cuisines use various spices and have very bold flavors. Padang/Minang food is popular throughout the country. Some of the Javanese food is kind of sweet with the sweet soy sauce they use. Manado food is also very interesting and flavorful. Aside from the fact that they will eat this food that would otherwise delicious served cold when it would taste great hot, the food is good.