Happier Abroad Forum Community

In the West, there are a lot of women who are not married and who are in their 30's, 40's and 50's. So, it kind of makes sense for one to date one's age.
Not in the Philippines. They have a mating/pairing up 'window' until about 23-24. The girls are supposed to find a sweetheart while in their late teens and then marry as soon as they have some kind of diploma as a rule.

Cute girls are gone off the " market" by about 21-22.

If a lady is not married by 23-24, it's not normal and she becomes and old maid. These are usually the least attractive ones, the nerdy ones, and the asexual ones. These are the leftover women.

And then, you have the " fallen angels" and the "separee's": single mothers, the ones who picked a good for nothing husband, the ones who had a BF who skipped on them, etc. Or you have intellectual, jaded ones and those who now hate all men. And no local men want them.

In other words, Filipina women after 24-25 by and large ( exceptions exist) do not form an attractive group that would make your heart sing. But it is quite numerous on many dating sites.

Note that there is pretty much no such thing as a wife-less, girfriend-less or woman-less Filipino man after about 23-24 as well.

The 18-23 female pool is the most dynamic group of women. And they are looking for a future husband. There is also a high %% of virgins especially in smaller towns.

So, when a "porener" arrives, he often finds that anyone over 24 is not very attractive or is already married and/or has a kid. Thus, he is basically pushed by society to look for a partner in the younger adult category. That stratum of society is as active as a buzzing bee hive. It's the mating years for them.

Therefore, the local culture will force the "porener" to date largely within that category.

In the West, it would be taboo (and actually very hard) for a 50-yo man to date a girl half his age. I don't know the trend in the US but, in the UK, couple usually marry young, the girl being in her early twenties. "There's always divorce", they say. By the time they divorce (as divorce they do!) and are back on the dating market, their prime is long behind them and it takes quite a level of desperation to choose them over a younger, cuter and more slender Filipina

For people like us, in the West, the only option is the leftover women, hoping to squeeze anything of value out of them, or divorced women with kids, looking for less of a rollercoaster ride with their second husband: support for their kids, a stable life, fulfilling (if boring) sex life, etc.

You tend to forget that not all foreign men who come to the Philippines are specifically looking for girls in the 19-23 age bracket. Many of them hook up with never-married single moms, widows, in their late 30s or even 40s. Some of them end up with upper-middle class ladies who gained independence (through work abroad or a career here) and could afford annulment. Those are probably the most interesting ones to be with, as they tend to be well-educated, well-travelled and interesting to be with. They probably don't feel "forced" to date and marry much younger girls.

The ideal situation would be to marry a young woman who is also well-educated, smart and, for some reason, chooses to be with us rather than a Filipino young man of same age. Marrying the average 20-yo morena from the province, who gives herself out of desperation, whose families can't wait to suck on the foreign man's cash tit, often leads to the man not having much in common with them, feeling bored, cheating and breaking hearts, etc.

how can one find a good local lady?