Another frustrated American Black Male chimes in...

[djeanp7898]

Long time reader, first time poster. Thank you Mr. Winston Wu for your inspiration. Here's my story...

I'm a Black American male and I can surely identify with the poster Mr. Darcy's plight.

I'm 35 years old, 6'5" tall, handsome, athletic, and intellectual, however I still suffer from the same issues. For those of you who think I get approached a lot because of my looks and height, think again. It's rare that I'm approached by women, although I do get the occasional glance when I go out to bars or whatever. Most of the time, women actively avoid eye contact with me. I'm not afraid to approach women at all - if I get a signal, I approach, however I find that in America women actively avoid contact with men they don't know. You go out to social venues, and nobody's social, especially the women. Everyone pretty much keeps to themselves and the women seem dead set against talking to men.

The sense of loneliness I feel is crushing because as Winston Wu has stated, if you don't have much of a social circle in America, it's very difficult to meet women. The women here in the Chicago area seem paranoid and anti-social. Many of them don't even want to LOOK at you. Frankly, I'm at my wit's end and highly frustrated, bitter, and angry with women here, because I feel like I'm not getting a fair shake. I'm not saying that EVERY woman should be into me - that's ridiculous and childish. However, I do feel like I should be having more success than I do. I just don't VIBE with many of these women. It's almost painful trying to interact with many of them - and trust me, I'm not a social retard by any means. The phony social mask that many American white women wear is such a turnoff and you can see right through it. I can often tell when an American white women is not used to dealing with people of color.

I'm attracted to lighter complected women, but as you all know, most American White women are not trying to date a Black man. For this reason, I'm quite wary of pursuing American white women either because 1) they're simply not attracted to Black men or have feelings of superiority, 2) they ARE attracted to Black men but because of the social consequences, they stay clear or try to keep the relationship on the low. I can somewhat understand Number 2, but it's still insulting.

I'm not the stereotypical American black male. I'm not tooting my own horn, but I have a degree in electronics, never been locked up, no children, keep myself in shape, love to read, and into intellectual pursuits. Most American Black women aren't feeling me because I'm not what they're used to, and other races of women won't date me for aforementioned reasons. I'm stuck between a rock and hard place and I feel like I'm going nowhere. I'm unhappy because I feel like I'm unwanted and I often question my own attractiveness. I'm not expecting pity, but I'm really frustrated. I can truly understand why so many American men have such anger and bitterness towards women.

I used to be down with the PUA movement years ago but eventually left it alone because to me PUA tactics are just coping mechanisms to deal with the crappy behavior of American women.

In a month or two, I'm going to be traveling to Rio de Janiero for the first time. I'm currently learning Portuguese and I'm coming along. I've never in my life been outside of North America and this is it. I'm nervous about it, but f**k it! I can't let fear hold me back from a life I KNOW I deserve. I'm not going down there just to bang a bunch of chicks or buy cheap prostitutes, but just to get a taste of how differently the women treat men down there. I'm highly curious and can't wait to get the f**k out of this PRISON MATRIX called America. I'm f***ing DONE with these over-inflated, self-entitled American women.

That is all. Thank you for reading.

[zboy1]

Welcome to the forum, djeanp7898! Wow, 6'5, athletic and handsome--and you're lonely and you can't get women! Man...I never realized how hard it was for Black men out there...I guess the stereotype of the smooth Black man with the ladies--doesn't really apply to most 'normal' Black men out there. Is that why we get so many Black men coming to the form?... Anyway, good luck in your endeavors in learning Portuguese. That will come-in-handy, when you do decide to leave the country and travel one day.

[djeanp7898]

Hi, zboy!

It's not that I can't get laid. I do let laid once in a while, but it's not consistent and I feel like it's the luck of the draw more than anything. I don't feel in control at all. Many women look at me and think I got women scattered all over town and it's just not that easy.

[Maverick]

Hey dude.

One of my best friends is a tall, friendly, good-looking black guy (though, he's in his early 20's and, thus, is somewhat naive to how the world works) and I see how people treat him here in the US. It's pretty awful.

Welcome to the forum and best of luck in South America!

[kai1275]

You and I are very similar, minus that tall height you have. American women are terrible but a 6'5" tall guy without any success finding a great wife would have to be a nerdy/geeky/high-end professional black man! Let's just face it. Ever since Obama came into office we have been catching hell ever since. A black man like you should have been able to write his own ticket years ago, but since you are still looking, you have no chance of finding one at your age that isn't a golddigger or some other undesirable trash.

Good luck to you in your search for a Brazilian. Those women look amazing. Brazilian women make women here jealous as hell with their perfectly proportioned ass-stomach-tits. Those were 3rd on my depth chart when I started looking abroad only because I speak Chinese, understand/speak some Japanese, speak and read some Spanish but I would have had to learn Portuguese from the beginning. I refuse to marry a woman whose language I cannot speak. That is stupid. Communication is key to a happy marriage, so I am glad you are making the effort to learn that language. Don't give up on that.

I went Chinese and I am going to bring her home with me Thursday.

[E Irizarry R&B Singer]

Yesh going to Rio may suit you, but if you need to get stateside women for a while: GET THE F.UCK OUT OF THE CHICAGOLAND AREA.

I just left there a week ago, and now I live among non-Black population and actually can think.

Don't bother asking "Where is that?" I gave you subtle yet blatant hints of where to go to live among people whom will judge you as an individual and not as a n.igger. Empathetically, due to how blacks act in Chicagoland and how Chicagoland-non-Blacks think that the only Latinos that exist are Mexicans/Chicanos, I was juxtaposed with c.oons whom has similar phenotype (even though I'm not albino and melanin-challenged so how "Black American" is that?) pigeonholed me into that damn archetype of a stereotype those White and Chicanos in Chicagoland think about you!

They don't know anything about non-White people of Brazilian ancestry. Very culture-challenged part of America: Chicagoland.

[Killhoffa]

Welcome to the forum djean7898. The key is solution and going to another Country is the solution, I plan on traveling later this year to Europe, Brazil's on that list also. Its good to talk about it, in America a non-stereotypical black/moorish male is invaluable. Most black females scratch you off the list if your not sagging those pants and acting like an neanderthal. White women either their not attracted to you or they don't want to face any backlash from white society, some just have preference for their own men and theres nothing wrong with it. Most of the latina women want to be white women or their chasing white tool. I used to have an account on zoosk set up in Pheonix and I got the Latina women that had kids damn near old as me writing to me, body all torn down, overweight. I have a background in mixed martial arts, consisting of Brazilian jui jitsu, Muay Thai, boxing, and krav magra and some wrestling and a little Greco Roman, look us up online Independent MMA and fitness in McDonough, GA. I don't train as nearly as much because I'm on the road driving trucks, but once I saw how these women thought that oh he's in shape, but since he's black I can scoop him up. Blacks/Moorish people need to understand racial politics and where we stand socially, socially we are back burner material! Basically the vast majority of the female population worships thug culture, bottom line mission statement, signed and sealed, approve by the State Commission LOL!

[kai1275]

I have a black belt in BJJ and Judo. If I had a Brazilian wife/gf I would probably spend half the time spent in Brazil rolling with guys and the other half with her. LOL! I want to train with Mario Sperry and or the Nogueira brothers so badly!

[PeterAndrewNolan]

Welcome djeanp7898,
it never ceases to amaze me how bad men have got it in the US around women. Apart from the wealthy guys or the guys with a lot of game it seems pretty bad over there. When I am in London I notice a HUGE difference as to how women act there....and they are not as bad as the US women I believe.

This is one reason why I left the west. Men are hated in the west. Why should I live where I am hated just because I am a man? The west is collapsing.....and good riddance to it.....just look at the scandal after scandal in the west now.....could they be trying any harder to disgrace themselves and work people up into a civil war which is the plan.

And don't worry about travelling. I have been travelling since 86. Travelling is good for the soul. It gives you are broader perspective of the world. I recommend it. Of course I travelled for work not on my own dime. I could never have travelled and lived like I have without it being paid for by clients.

So go overseas and have a look around. You will find that the US is not what it is cracked up to be.....I have been there many times....in the south it is pretty good...but in the north people are usually not very friendly.

[E Irizarry R&B Singer]

....You will find that the US is not what it is cracked up to be.....I have been there many times....in the south it is pretty good...but in the north people are usually not very friendly.

I usually do not read your posts, but this one was unusually succinct compared to a lot of your other posts. Based on the aforementioned, people in the north may not have been as friendly as you have observed, but the south may have been friendly to you because you are perceived as a White American man. I'm just stating.

If I am wrong, please correct what I have said with a logical and thorough rebuttal.

[djeanp7898]

I did it! I bought my plane ticket, visa, and renewed my passport. I'm going to Rio, Brazil in August! Am I a little nervous about this trip? YES. But damnit, the time is NOW. This will be my first time outside of North America. I could not procrastinate any longer.

Am I traveling to Rio to bang a bunch of "working" girls? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I'm going to experience the different way that women interact with men. I've heard all the stories and I want to go and see for myself.

[Moretorque]

One good sign here in the US is that it appears most women coming along want to be stay at home moms so the tide may be turning, people do not kid yourself. You are a rat living in a social experiment with the game rules created by our rulers.

The money runs the whole gig here period, we are waiting for everybody to figure out changing the money is the major key to changing the fundamentals of our whole civilization.

[mguy]

Welcome to the forum. In my sig you will find a thread about expatriation for minority men.

We, as minority (Asian here), have a bigger reason to expatriate than others. What you have is almost perfect stats and you should not be in this position. I know of an Asian-American who was a successful entrepreneur had a penthouse went to MIT, but the top girls was not into him -- he was 5'10 and buff -- and as I hate to say this: your race has something to do with (im sure you know).

So ask yourself if you are going to continue living like this? There are ways to get through. Try to ignore the problem and focus on other activities (dating is just one factor), and if you can't, then welcome to the board and let information help you.

[Moretorque]

These guy's have and are for the most part setting this system up of top down social control world wide, do not kid yourself you are not running from this.

2 wrongs do not make a right ( Daa Herd and The Herder ) the only hope for people on a personal level is to start being able to see outside the box and realize they are being manipulated for building a social hierarchy by the system that is right down to personal.

Most people are to stupid to see it and that is what the ruling Elite are counting on, they have and are hijacking all media and legal systems world wide to shape your impressionable mind from the day you are born and in the process all this social twisting is completely turning the whole world into a f***ing loony bin on a personal level for most.

#1 criteria for me when trying to develop a relationship these days is are the people aware of what is really going on around them and are they willing to learn if they are not. In my opinion in order to go forward on a personal level with people you have got to be able to see outside the box and unfortunately alot of people cannot.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

I applaud you for coming to this realization. Take your trip to Brazil as you plan, but I highly encourage you to step out of the box of countries that "black men like."

Get out far and wide in the world because I believe any country in the Americas is not for black men like yourself.

Good luck.