Repatriate wrote:Rock wrote:
This is so NOT true in my own personal case. In the US, I could not even get dates, let alone get a girlfriend or get laid. But once I started traveling to places like Colombia, Thailand, Brazil, and Taiwan, I quickly transformed into a playboy. I made-up for my lost high school and pre-college days 100 times over. After those experiences abroad, I thought then that with my new-found success and confidence, I could come back home and score dates and more in college. But alas, nothing had changed. And it remains so to this day. Girlfriends, romance, sex and love, are available to me without P4P, but just in some overseas locales, not in the States. As Winston says, location, location, location.
Just curious Rock, but what region or state in the U.S. did you grow up in? I didn't find the U.S. that alienating and it's interesting that you faced that much rejection considering you fit into the 3 most commonly accepted categories in the U.S. 1) Right race 2) Height 3) income level that a lot of American women seem to be the most open for.
I never faced that sort of extreme rejection despite being the socially defined "wrong" race. The U.S. is definitely wacky though when it comes to socializing. There is always a palpable sense of alienation and unease that involves social interactions back in bizarro world.
I think if your White but not the right looking White, you might struggle. My boy Rob was the prototypical White Guy, attractive, clean cut, solid family, decent job, his own place, etc. He preferred Women of Color though and wouldn't give even some very attractive White Women the time of day. In his estimation, Asian, Hispanic, Black Women and then White Women were his order of preference.
While my boy Doug came from a Working Class family, found it difficult dating because of his working class background in a city (Simi Valley) with many solid middle class to upper middle class family (very Republican). Ended up in ORDER, a local hoe then he knocked up a childhood friend of our's sister and was sorta forced to marry this woman, who whom he's still married too. I just found out for a relationship that should have ended years ago, they are having a another child! My boy Doug is my best friend, makes great money (80-90K) but always pleasing his wife, she got the house she wanted ($2500 a month house payment), various NEW cars (current one is a '09 Tahoe) and doesn't WORK.
I haven't seen very many of my White friend struggle dating, just my boy Mark and he's dead (suicide).
In my experience, I was often the wrong color in my circle of friend when it came to women, or I just wasn't the athletic Black Man. Both my homies Mel and Stacey both worked out, were tall and Stacy's case was a track star who end up in Chico State on scholarship. Both these men by being the stereotypical athletic, tall and strong Black Man, among my friends includes a former NFL player, who's son just was picked in the 2nd round of the NFL draft and signed after the strike was over.
All these men had NO PROBLEM attracting White Women and I mean NO PROBLEM.
I only struggled as much as I wanted too I guess. Hard to identify while actually living it, but I think it was a lack of confidence and being risk adverse that doomed me to going home alone a majority of the time. Which made me become a better DJ, better at playing video games, working on cars, racing cars, all that other stuff that friends came to me for, but of no real value to women. Now being handy is a value to women looking for husbands, but I don't get extra points for that.
I stop bailing people out too. Installing car stereos for free, picking people up late at night, etc. How in a hole that I'm working my way out of, the only answer is overseas.