Do you relate better with older individuals?

zacb · Post by **zacb** » February 13th, 2013, 5:06 pm

Even though I don't agree with everything they stand for, I tend to be able to talk to people who are older (40+) than to my own age. Anyone else like this?

lone_yakuza · Post by **lone_yakuza** » February 13th, 2013, 7:27 pm

jamesbond · Post by **jamesbond** » February 13th, 2013, 11:34 pm

Even as a teenager, I always got along better with older people. Older people are more mature and intelligent than a lot of young people are. In college, I got along the best with foreign students.

A lot of my friends in college were from foreign countries. I noticed the big difference between them and the american students.

publicduende · Post by **publicduende** » February 14th, 2013, 1:41 am

I guess for many of us is also a matter of family upbringing. If you have been surrounded by trusted adults who you used to look up to and whom would take the bother to spend quality time with you and care for you, and teach something about life; in that case, no doubt there will be an "imprinting" to cherish senior people for their maturity and wisdom.

In Italy, like in any other mediterranean and middle eastern culture, the elderly is respected and treasured as a repository of wisdom, authority and unconditional love. I wouldn't even imagine how my life could have been without my granny (who passed away more than 15 years ago), my aunties and uncles, basically all of the adults in my extended family. I am pretty sure it will be the same for many Spanish, Turkish, Latin American men of my generation.

Post by **Winston** » February 14th, 2013, 6:17 am

I was going to start a thread about this too.

How come the easiest people to have a mature down to earth conversation with are older people and other freethinkers like us?

Little kids are also friendlier, more open and more nonjudgmental too. But once they become teens, they start to become stuck up and cliquish. Why is that? It's so sad.

So I guess little kids and older adults are more open and easy to talk to than people in between.

S_Parc · Post by **S_Parc** » February 14th, 2013, 7:04 am

Winston wrote:I was going to start a thread about this too.

How come the easiest people to have a mature down to earth conversation with are older people and other freethinkers like us?

Little kids are also friendlier, more open and more nonjudgmental too. But once they become teens, they start to become stuck up and cliquish. Why is that? It's so sad.

So I guess little kids and older adults are more open and easy to talk to than people in between.

My guess is that Jr HS and HS are the downfall of the American youth. There, behavioral patterns are reinforced and ppl's identities are carved in stone.

Unless one is planning to be recruited by some NCAA college football program, it's better to be homeschooled and to take college courses in HS, instead of hanging out with a bunch of wankers, fighting to be captain of some intramural lacrosse team.

Ghost · Post by **Ghost** » February 14th, 2013, 3:40 pm

Tsar · Post by **Tsar** » February 14th, 2013, 6:58 pm

I relate more to older people and to foreigners (Not American or any Anglo). It's easier to talk to them and feel more comfortable around them. Most older people have manners and know how to give people some basic respect.

My generation is talking about the latest reality tv show episode, what is happening on Jersey Shore, binge drinking on Friday nights, or the latest drama happening in their lives. With most young people in America it's all the aforementioned and more. Always on their smartphones and hanging out in their little clique. Many girls love their drama (most American girls=drama queens) and many men in my generation love being thugs and gangster (scum and players). They always want to judge you. The girls will not have anything to do with you unless you are the complete package (money, looks, personality, humor, charm, and many want to be treated like dirt. They think that if a man shows them respect he's weak and not "tough enough." Whores!). The men in my generation always judge other guys (are they "pushovers" or are they the "cool and gangster"). It's very difficult to meet the good people because they already have their close group and they don't make themselves known (good girls either have their own friends and don't talk to other guys; the good guys just become loners or avoid other guys. It's a lose-lose situation).

With older people I don't feel as reserved or defensive because they have more respect for people and decency. It's not like they will judge you because they have a life and don't feel the need to constantly judge others.

With non-Anglo foreigners it's like they are happier, more respectful, well mannered, refined, and open to new friendships.

Everywhere you go in America it's like you are being judged and "sized up" by everyone. In America it is very superficial and unfriendly. I would rank American college students as the Number #1 unfriendliest Americans by age.

Guyver · Post by **Guyver** » February 14th, 2013, 7:14 pm

Ghost wrote:The only real problem I sometimes have with the elderly is how they often think that the society and people are the same as they were when they were young. So they have traditional expectations for people (i.e. young men) in a society that has shirked tradition and virtue. I don't fault them for this too much though. It is hard to shake the past, especially if the past was better in some ways. You just have to see past that because they often can't.

Agreed, I get along best with older generations of people because they are so down to earth. I don't like how they think that modern times for young men is the same as it was for them in their youth, but I don't fault them for it. It's just what they were raised with, so they can't help it. Each year, my dad has an annual Christmas party at his house, and it is always people from his generation. I always like going to it because everyone there is in their 50's to 60's and easy to talk to. I go to a party with a bunch of people that are my age, and I want to leave in the first five minutes. What a difference.

Dark_Sol · Post by **Dark_Sol** » February 15th, 2013, 12:05 am

This conversation feels like Dejavu. I swore I had a conversation about this with someone, or was it all in my head

Post by **Winston** » February 15th, 2013, 4:12 am

I think there are several factors going on here that explains why many of us relate to older people better:

1) Older people are more authentic and down to earth because people in the past were. And since we are too, we connect with them easier.
2) Older people no longer have looks or youth going for them, so they look inward and focus on wisdom and spiritual pursuits. So they have no reason to be snobby or stuck up.
3) Older people have more life experience, so they understand people and events better, as well as human nature, and see the bigger picture too.
4) Assuming reincarnation is real, a lot of us are probably old souls, and thus are more on the wavelength of older people.

S_Parc · Post by **S_Parc** » February 15th, 2013, 6:32 am

Winston wrote:I think there are several factors going on here that explains why many of us relate to older people better

I'm going to say *some* older persons. The reason for that is that some have had experiences where during their 20s/30s, they were either real men or real women and now, see the broader spectrum of life. Thus, now that they're in the 55-80 year old category, they can in fact, acquire a level of wisdom, based upon those things. So my point is that age doesn't make one a mystic or some yogic master.

On the other hand, I severely doubt that most ppl, born between 1965 and 1995, will ever achieve any level of wisdom, given the fact that boys have been trained to be girl-like and vice versa. Thus, their mid-life crisis will simply be in determining what their true gender origins are about. I suspect that these generations will end up as dysfunctional senior citizens.

abcdavid01 · Post by **abcdavid01** » February 15th, 2013, 8:18 am

Haha yup, we've passed the tipping point. I mean, Barry O is a little older, but he's a part of it. Of course the next president could be older, but we've pretty much reached the point where the f***ed up generations have started running the show.

They'll be the ones entirely bankrupting the system when they retire too.

onethousandknives · February 15th, 2013, 2:28 pm

I've heard this blamed on Aspergers (Which I'm diagnosed with) but yeah, me too. Even as a little kid, I'd just walk up to random older people and ask them stuff. Older people for the most part are much nicer to me. Me personally, I've even been mistaken for being like 30 years old at 20 just because of the way I carry myself as being "older."

Post by **Winston** » April 9th, 2013, 1:19 pm

I asked Ginger and Rock about this the other day about how older people are so much easier to talk to. Ginger made a good point. She said that it's because older people are not trying to conform whereas younger people are. That's why older people are more laid back, easygoing and easier to talk to. That made sense. So you see, it's not just that older people are wiser and have more experience. It's also that they are no longer trying to conform or be accepted. So they can relax and be more open. And of course, they also see a bigger picture. Not all of course. I'm just talking about the ones that do.