If you marry to a non-american woman in a foreign country does American alimony and child support law apply to you?

[ArchibaultNew]

Hey guys,
I'm curious since you guys live abroad. I always wanted to know this.

[MrMan]

Hey guys,
I'm curious since you guys live abroad. I always wanted to know this.

If you got divorced in.... say California... and a judge there ordered you to pay alimony and you didn't, you might get in trouble if you went back.

But if you went abroad and married a woman and your wife divorced you while you both lived in her home country, you'd be required to pay whatever the courts there ordered.

[ArchibaultNew]

Hey guys,
I'm curious since you guys live abroad. I always wanted to know this.

If you got divorced in.... say California... and a judge there ordered you to pay alimony and you didn't, you might get in trouble if you went back.

But if you went abroad and married a woman and your wife divorced you while you both lived in her home country, you'd be required to pay whatever the courts there ordered.

I see so the law that applies is the law in the country in which you reside? So say, if you are in a country that only has child support and no alimony, will you be legally oblige to pay alimony because you are American? Could you wife go to the US embassy and tell them that she wants "alimony" or not really?

[MrMan]

Hey guys,
I'm curious since you guys live abroad. I always wanted to know this.

If you got divorced in.... say California... and a judge there ordered you to pay alimony and you didn't, you might get in trouble if you went back.

But if you went abroad and married a woman and your wife divorced you while you both lived in her home country, you'd be required to pay whatever the courts there ordered.

I see so the law that applies is the law in the country in which you reside? So say, if you are in a country that only has child support and no alimony, will you be legally oblige to pay alimony because you are American? Could you wife go to the US embassy and tell them that she wants "alimony" or not really?

I don't know about every country, but my understanding is almost all of 'family law' in the US is at the state level (or territory) and the federal government has little or nothing to do with alimony. Let's say you and your wife had a house in California and worked in Saudi Arabia. She goes to California over the holidays to see her parents, files for divorce, or whatever. They you might have to get divorced in California. California is bad about getting their claws in you and not letting you go as a state resident after you have actually moved and had no ties there, for taxes at least, the last I heard.

But if you went to the Philippines and married a pretty little Filipina, where would she file for divorce? Does the Philippines even have divorce? If you married a sleazy bar girl, she could just leave you and go live with a boyfriend. But I don't see how this could turn into alimony.

[ArchibaultNew]

Hey guys,
I'm curious since you guys live abroad. I always wanted to know this.

If you got divorced in.... say California... and a judge there ordered you to pay alimony and you didn't, you might get in trouble if you went back.

But if you went abroad and married a woman and your wife divorced you while you both lived in her home country, you'd be required to pay whatever the courts there ordered.

I see so the law that applies is the law in the country in which you reside? So say, if you are in a country that only has child support and no alimony, will you be legally oblige to pay alimony because you are American? Could you wife go to the US embassy and tell them that she wants "alimony" or not really?

I don't know about every country, but my understanding is almost all of 'family law' in the US is at the state level (or territory) and the federal government has little or nothing to do with alimony. Let's say you and your wife had a house in California and worked in Saudi Arabia. She goes to California over the holidays to see her parents, files for divorce, or whatever. They you might have to get divorced in California. California is bad about getting their claws in you and not letting you go as a state resident after you have actually moved and had no ties there, for taxes at least, the last I heard.

But if you went to the Philippines and married a pretty little Filipina, where would she file for divorce? Does the Philippines even have divorce? If you married a sleazy bar girl, she could just leave you and go live with a boyfriend. But I don't see how this could turn into alimony.

I see, great insights. Would it depend where do you hold property in the US or where you get married? For instance, say you have a aparment in the state of Georgia but live abroad constantly. You get married to a foreign Fillipina or other foreign woman. Could she go to the court in Georgia and demand anything or it would be quite difficult? It seems the latter is the case, however, I wanted to confirm just in case.

The second scenario, say you don't get married but you have a child with a foreign woman. Could she travel to your state and sue you for alimony. Or not really? Would you only have to abide by the law of the country you live in say the Philippines?

[MrMan]

I see, great insights. Would it depend where do you hold property in the US or where you get married? For instance, say you have a aparment in the state of Georgia but live abroad constantly. You get married to a foreign Fillipina or other foreign woman. Could she go to the court in Georgia and demand anything or it would be quite difficult? It seems the latter is the case, however, I wanted to confirm just in case.

If she could get to Georgia and you have a residence there, she could probably do that. She'd need some kind of greencard or visa to get into the country to do it. She'd also have to know about it. If she has cash and can hire a lawyer, she could do that. Do divorce lawyers work on commission?

If I were single wouldn't marry a woman I didn't trust enough to get a Greencard for.

The second scenario, say you don't get married but you have a child with a foreign woman. Could she travel to your state and sue you for alimony. Or not really? Would you only have to abide by the law of the country you live in say the Philippines?

She would probably have to have some means of establishing residency for the bastard child. Give your babies a legal dad.

[ArchibaultNew]

I see, great insights. Would it depend where do you hold property in the US or where you get married? For instance, say you have a aparment in the state of Georgia but live abroad constantly. You get married to a foreign Fillipina or other foreign woman. Could she go to the court in Georgia and demand anything or it would be quite difficult? It seems the latter is the case, however, I wanted to confirm just in case.

If she could get to Georgia and you have a residence there, she could probably do that. She'd need some kind of greencard or visa to get into the country to do it. She'd also have to know about it. If she has cash and can hire a lawyer, she could do that. Do divorce lawyers work on commission?

If I were single wouldn't marry a woman I didn't trust enough to get a Greencard for.

The second scenario, say you don't get married but you have a child with a foreign woman. Could she travel to your state and sue you for alimony. Or not really? Would you only have to abide by the law of the country you live in say the Philippines?

She would probably have to have some means of establishing residency for the bastard child. Give your babies a legal dad.

All of these sounds tricky. I guess the best option is to not talk about where you are based at in that case. You are better off saying you are a local or from a different country and not disclosing your Americaness. Particularly due to property.

[MrMan]

So you want to marry a woman without letting her know qhere you are from, without letting her meet your family? You might have to find a gullible woman with poor judgment to pull that off...abd pass her genes to your offspring.

It is better to marry a woman with good morals and values and be honest with her.

Why do you make money anyway? Money allowa a man to experience life and provide for his needs and others. If money is more important to you than your marriage or relationship with your children, there is a problem.

[Yohan]

I see so the law that applies is the law in the country in which you reside? So say, if you are in a country that only has child support and no alimony, will you be legally oblige to pay alimony because you are American? Could you wife go to the US embassy and tell them that she wants "alimony" or not really?

I know about a case of an Australian man who married a Thai woman and both of them were living in Thailand, and both of them never visited Australia after their marriage up to their divorce.

Still the Thai woman was preparing with a lawyer to file secretly for divorce in Australia - where laws are much better for women than in Thailand.
By Australian law this was possible.

However the Australian man got that information from somewhere and he quickly - just a few days before she was able with a lawyer to file for divorce in Australia - filed for divorce in Thailand.

While all what he had in Thailand was lost (a foreigner cannot own land, only condominium), his ex-wife was not able to get a part of his savings in Australia. The property law in Thailand is very strong, overriding divorce ruling - the person whose name is in the land title is the owner even after divorce, no question about that (but in Australia in case of divorce this is not always like that)

No children, therefore no child support, but in Thailand anyway, there is no clear regulation about it, and of course no alimony.
The Thai divorce is final, no payments can be claimed after.

It obviously depends on the laws of BOTH countries and in which country the divorce is requested - if it is done in both countries, the court which received the request earlier is in charge of it.

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Laws are quite different in Western countries and in Asian countries.

In Japan (where I am living as an European citizen, married with a Japanese woman since more than 40 years) there is no way to collect child support from the father, however there is also no invitation right.

In general the father disappears after divorce and does not care anymore, or sometimes the mother disappears with their children to an unknown address as she does not want to see her ex-husband anymore.

Alimony, there is no way, and most lawyers and even courts do not want to have anything to do with divorce, it's no business in Japan in general, unless both are really very rich. Most ordinary people, regardless if local or foreign spouse are just going together to the ward office, fill in a form, sign together and move on...

Unlike Western countries, co-habitation is not accepted as a form of a common household in Japan. Basically two singles sharing the same rooms.
Shared private banking accounts are also not allowed, even not if married. One person - one banking account in his or her name and this person is the owner of that money.

[ArchibaultNew]

I see so the law that applies is the law in the country in which you reside? So say, if you are in a country that only has child support and no alimony, will you be legally oblige to pay alimony because you are American? Could you wife go to the US embassy and tell them that she wants "alimony" or not really?

I know about a case of an Australian man who married a Thai woman and both of them were living in Thailand, and both of them never visited Australia after their marriage up to their divorce.

Still the Thai woman was preparing with a lawyer to file secretly for divorce in Australia - where laws are much better for women than in Thailand.
By Australian law this was possible.

However the Australian man got that information from somewhere and he quickly - just a few days before she was able with a lawyer to file for divorce in Australia - filed for divorce in Thailand.

While all what he had in Thailand was lost (a foreigner cannot own land, only condominium), his ex-wife was not able to get a part of his savings in Australia. The property law in Thailand is very strong, overriding divorce ruling - the person whose name is in the land title is the owner even after divorce, no question about that (but in Australia in case of divorce this is not always like that)

No children, therefore no child support, but in Thailand anyway, there is no clear regulation about it, and of course no alimony.
The Thai divorce is final, no payments can be claimed after.

It obviously depends on the laws of BOTH countries and in which country the divorce is requested - if it is done in both countries, the court which received the request earlier is in charge of it.

----------------------------------------------

Laws are quite different in Western countries and in Asian countries.

In Japan (where I am living as an European citizen, married with a Japanese woman since more than 40 years) there is no way to collect child support from the father, however there is also no invitation right.

In general the father disappears after divorce and does not care anymore, or sometimes the mother disappears with their children to an unknown address as she does not want to see her ex-husband anymore.

Alimony, there is no way, and most lawyers and even courts do not want to have anything to do with divorce, it's no business in Japan in general, unless both are really very rich. Most ordinary people, regardless if local or foreign spouse are just going together to the ward office, fill in a form, sign together and move on...

Unlike Western countries, co-habitation is not accepted as a form of a common household in Japan. Basically two singles sharing the same rooms.
Shared private banking accounts are also not allowed, even not if married. One person - one banking account in his or her name and this person is the owner of that money.

Excellent content man. I will about more in-depth questions.

[MrMan]

In general the father disappears after divorce and does not care anymore, or sometimes the mother disappears with their children to an unknown address as she does not want to see her ex-husband anymore.

I had a neighbor who experienced this. He was a white man who taught in Japan. His wife divorced him, stole his son, and disappeared. He didn't see him until he was a teenager.

[Yohan]

I had a neighbor who experienced this. He was a white man who taught in Japan. His wife divorced him, stole his son, and disappeared. He didn't see him until he was a teenager.

In Japan divorce is a private matter, most divorces are done out of court, as lawyers are expensive and courts are not interested in dealing with such issues.
Generally said, laws are not the same everywhere, and if you live in Japan with a Japanese woman as a foreign man, Japanese law will apply.

It works in both directions, in this case above the wife took their son and disappeared somewhere in Japan.

However there are also comments from those Japanese wives with children, where the husband (often US servicemen in Okinawa are mentioned) disappeared back to the US after divorce and never cared about the ex-wife and their children.

(Even the Japan born Okinawa governor Denny Tamaki looks like an American and has never met his US-father)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denny_Tamaki

I remember a few years ago, Japan was accused by some foreign men, that Japanese women are allowed to take away their children.

The Japanese government in return decided to try to count how many foreign men are indeed willing to meet their children they had with their former Japanese girlfriends/ex-wives AND are willing to pay some voluntary child support.

Only 19 foreign men were found - but questioning these Japanese women, to hear both sides of the story, they even refused to accept child support and just wanted to be away from these foreign men out of various reasons.

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The issue is very tricky. In the US the law is totally different, but there are also many complaints about men who are forced to pay child support, but are unable nevertheless to meet their children because the mother hides them somehow and disrespects court rulings.

Other men are jobless, cannot pay and are sent to jail (not the best place to earn money to pay debts....)
I remember a case in US on youtube, where a guy had 14 children and some of them were working already and paid for him the missing child support for themselves to get their father out of prison.

The question is also in the US why these laws are working only from father to mother - there are cases where mothers left their children with their father, never paid any child support and never were sent to jail - not even one of these mothers...

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In Japan the situation is also not the best, but the basic rule says no legal way to collect child support.

Most couples find a private solution, children to the mother, the father pays some money voluntarily to the ex-wife or girlfriend and in return can meet frequently their children.

In general this solution works, as the financial situation of single mothers is not very good in many cases and even after divorce they keep some contact to each other.

It works however also if the father does not want to pay child support and/or the mother finds another man to live with her and those children and cuts any contact with the father.

Dating a single mother is easier in Japan than in Western countries, most Japanese men do not want to be disturbed by the ex-husband or ex-boyfriend calling the ex-wife concerning their children. For the new man with a single mother there is nothing to worry anyway, he will never be kept to be subject to child support and even alimony either even if he leaves this single mother and her off-springs later on....

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I would never recommend to date a single mother in Western countries, just too risky.
But in Japan and some other Asian countries you can do it, nothing to worry about.

[ArchibaultNew]

Great post on the differences. Do you think it applies to Germany and France as well or only the Anglosphere.