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6 posts • Page 1 of 1
Have listened to several of Steve's shows and I appreciate the lone voice discussing some much less talked about concerns.
He definitely needs to continue.
Here's one reason why.
We all know there are tons of self-help audiobooks, radio programs, etc.
There are various religious teachings of all sorts.
And of course, the whole PUA products.
You hear over and over about staying positive, taking action, being faithful, being patient, being persistent, etc.
Now, a good deal of these speakers already have relationships, spouses, and many, families.
They would have a hard time relating to what we discuss.
There's that whole mainstream field of products.
Ok, so what about alternative sources? With the internet, there are many alternative radio programs which can be educational and open your thoughts, but very rarely are they discussing what we do here. It's usually about politics or any other sort of thing.
The distortion in the American culture since the 60's or so and highly amped up since the late 80's has done some heavy damage overall no doubt.
Now, the masses have either been shuffled right into it and are blinded and just carrying on, or they simply didn't catch the blows hard enough.
To be clear, I'm talking here of just the relationships aspect and more of the ones who had to go without for so long.
We all know of the many bad and failed marriages.
I can not include them because if a person like of what we discuss here, tries to explain to even them why they have been without for quite some time, they won't understand, for even they, despite their bad marriage, met up with someone.
There has to be some people here at the forum, and I believe Steve as well (based on some of his words in the show) who have taken a specific brunt of this storm we've been going through, meaning, seemingly almost no matter what one has tried to do in the U.S. (or some other Western lands), they just haven't scored. BUT, it's also not completely their fault for they've had some good experiences in other lands with non-working girls who were NOT after them for the money or citizenship status.
Ok so eventually, after having spent too much time, money and energy in places like the U.S. and some other Western lands, really trying to make this work, you see like you're still in a storm and for some reason you're the one taking the hardest brunt of it ending up single, so you find yourself in some sort of 3rd world country, easily meeting not just nice non-working females, but nice people overall.
THEN, when you try to explain to people of your past (or new people) how the lack all that time in the other places really was not all your fault, they simply don't understand and write it off as it must have been your fault, or, the famous one we hear, that you must just be some sort of insecure loser and not up to the challenges or extra work of your homeland women.
I won't share the details of my upbringing, but I honestly can go through each chapter and see how there were truly forces outside of me or who I was, that actually prevented me from being successful in the home land.
Each chapter, each event, really outside of my control, just hit me the hardest in that specific area of being with someone.
A good deal was due to the twisted culture and myself just happening to take the crappy part of the stick as they say, while others got the other end.
Or, it was simply bad luck, bad timing.
I know with all my heart, it was not me. I am a very open minded person, have studied a lot and have had many experiences since the days of old and simply know, it was not myself. I've heard over and over how I am fun, funny, intellectual, outgoing, attractive, caring, deep, etc. Both from people in the homeland and abroad.
So you listen to all these various self-help speakers, religious teachers, etc and some times you wonder if it was just meant to be part of your path. Or some of them even say if you've missed out on that for too long that you are not missing out, or whatever else feel-good stuff is promoted.
We all know how great it feels to be holding a female you're attracted to and she-you, and other things. So I say BS when people say you're not missing out, or to be patient more.
Very very rarely have I heard speakers mention for example the messed up culture, say of the many things, feminism, and how some honestly good, nice looking, healthy, smart, fun guys have simple suffered the blows of this cultural storm. When it really has nothing to do with them not needing to gain more confidence or take more action (how much more do you take other than leaving the country, which we have done!), or to be more patient (how many more years? There are all around good guys this very day still suffering, waiting more precious time, when really nothing is wrong with them, instead they are in a storm and happen to be the ones catching the harshest brunt of it - they need to get out!).
Sigh - lot's of stuff there.
We know we could talk on and on about this. I won't here. The point though IS, someone is already on the voicewaves doing such - Steve Hoca.
Ok some times he goes off somewhat, but I mean the general context is there.
This is very rare to find discussed even in 2010. It's both not quite PC and also not so popular and thus understandable to the masses.
Most of the masses are either in relationships (good or bad. Doesn't matter, in their eyes they have someone, so when you can't in their area, they simply can't relate), in families, or just so lost. Either way, much of the masses won't understand what we are saying. This is one of the reasons why this forum is good, not just to help each other in the same types of boats, but also for the ones of the masses who don't understand what we are saying, and maybe might through what we discuss. Audio medium is typically easier for people as they can do other things while listening.
I hear a passion about all of this in Steve. If he adds a bit more structure and focus (such as breaking it down with several examples of someone for example growing up in the U.S. who caught blow after blow in various ways, which prevented their success despite all their efforts), he really will carry on a well needed, well appreciated niche show.
He could also have one or two shows with well researched discussion about just the feminism movement alone. Who are the ones that really pushed it. How it has affected the males (both in marriages and the single), how it ultimately is detrimental to females and how it is less in other lands and this then results in easier flows in relations.
There is just so much he could cover.
I'm assuming eventually he'll read this post and I would like to offer it as some extra motivation to carry on.
We try to explain to others how it's not just an issue of insecure loser guys going elsewhere to find the things that all people should experience.
Or being lazy and taking the easy route, not wanting to put in enough effort.
Do these masses that say "hey, don't know what your problem is, but I had no problem hooking up", do they understand that maybe it's not you and that maybe you just caught the harshest brunt end of this storm?
You've even fought hard enough. Gone out over and over. Maybe simply a black cloud really DOES exist, and has nothing to do with the person. They then get far away enough to where the black cloud is no more and wahlah! success.
Steve, I would suggest at least some discussion on these two things as explanations to the masses that don't understand - that maybe a nice overall guy just either caught the harshest end of this storm or simply has a black cloud over him while in the U.S. etc. Or simply maybe not meant to be in these places.
Long post. Thanks to whoever read the whole thing.
"Give me liberty or give me death" - Patrick Henry
I'll pass this wonderful message on to Steve and make sure he sees it.
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"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne
Thanks Winston. I see it's a really long post, but the details are necessary.
He could also have a show or TEN in regards to the negatives of the Western ways such as people thinking too much, like myself , over-analyzing, excessive judgement, fakeness, non-humility, complicated lives, too much tension and stress, frustrating cliques, excessive and often unnecessary competing, high jealousy, etc. Some may actually find positives in those attributes. Well, not really my cup of tea.
"Give me liberty or give me death" - Patrick Henry
I heartily disagree with this, TBH. The Anglosphere, in particular, has sunk into an abyss of wanton hedonism. Intellectual musings (or even thoughts that aren't in some way carnal) do not take precedence in the minds of most young Anglo's at least. Even older Anglo types (especially in AUS and the US) tend to be quite anti-intellectual.
The Anglosphere has many, many deficiencies despite being fairly dominant technologically and even culturally (through the English language), but over-intellectualising is not one of them.
I see your point. I was more referring to, for example, when you have interactions, or pass by some people, instead of just simply accepting you for you, they will over think, over analyze and judge. We've all seen others doing this. Where as in non-Western, 3rd world places, they are more care-free in this sense (what I mean about thinking less - not saying they're stupid!).
As well, in intimate relationships. Say, some psycho women, over analyzing things or even making up stuff. Getting super psychological with stuff. Playing deep games. Or if you do something slightly out of line (as we all will because none of us are perfect), it's met with unrealistic judgement, etc.
THAT'S what I was referring to mostly in regards to the thinking too much aspect. Hope that makes sense.
You do make a good point about hedonism. I see a branch of this run quite amok known as selfishness. Wow is it quite extreme, be it US, Canada, Australia, UK, Europe, etc.
Obviously, with high selfishness, it can also make it hard for them to even care about letting the outsider into their cliques for example.
So many ugly things stem from selfishness.
"Give me liberty or give me death" - Patrick Henry
Oh right. I think, particularly in males, that has to do more with confidence and negative reinforcement caused by past experiences. If the women in a given society treat you like a serf, then you're obviously gonna think twice about approaching them.
Yes, very true - this is one of the reasons why I'm not a hedonist. Not only do I think it not fulfilling spiritually (because IMO, sex ought to be an expression of affection, not just something as mundane as eating and breathing), but it is obviously self-absorbed behaviour, like you say.