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Steve Hoca's Trip to the Philippines

Post your trip reports, travel experiences, and updates abroad. Or your expat story if you already live overseas. Note: To post photos and images, insert the image URL between the tags [img]and[/img] after uploading them to a third party site.

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Postby green1976 » Mon Nov 14, 2011 8:04 pm

Winston wrote:Steve Hoca returned from the Philippines a long time ago. He is back in Ohio. He has made a few videos but not much. And he rarely answers his email anymore. I don't know why. I guess he is just a streaky guy who is hyper passionate one moment and gone the next?


Maybe he was disappointed regarding ladies or something happening with his girlfriend in the Philippines.
In his videos and audios, i most of the time found his ideas quit interesting and worth to listen.

I remarked how much passion he put on it..sounded like he has a lot of hate inside him against American women.

Naturally,it can be difficult to keep our coolness when we deal with it everyday and no definitive solution to expatriate can be found.

Surely,he is hyper passionate,a recipe for uncalled reactions who will surprise people who knows him.
Only him knows what's the reality of it,and how he plans his future.

Being a passionate person is not in my opinion a bad thing,but it's impossible to keep the hyper passionate level high or a mental breakdown is possible.

It will destruct the logical sense,loosing ground with the reality and falling in the trap of becoming hateful when things are not going well.
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Postby Winston » Wed Sep 26, 2012 8:51 am

Ok here are the sum total of all the updates that Steve Hoca sent me about his trip to the Philippines. It contains a few updates and many post-trip comments afterward. I looked them over in my email archives and don't see anything that might be of a confidential nature in them, so I think it's safe to release them in full here. As you can see, what he says validates pretty much everything I've said about the Philippines and Filipinas.

Steve Hoca's updates and comments about his Philippines trip:

Hello Winston:

Just wanted to tell you that I found this super nice Filipina in Cagayan de Oro who I met on Filipina cupid. She is wonderful.

You are right, when going to the mall, I don't feel like a creep. Women -- not all though -- smile at me when I am with this girl. There is none of this feeling of "you're a creep". In America, if a 40-year-old guy like me were holding hands with a 20-year-old in a mall, they would call security and have me investigated.

I don't feel any hostility from Filipino people (including women). They are, for the most part, hard-working and very friendly, especially in the province of Mindanao. I am elated.

I will show you great video I did. It's amazing. Some things here are super expensive, however, so you have to be careful how you spend your money. But aside from the economics, most Filipinos are really fun to talk to.

Also, I am not into the Angeles City thing. There are too many nice girls that bypass the whole need for sexual tourism.

One last thing. You can fly to any island in the Philippines via cebupacificair.com for about 60 american dollars. That is super cheap.

Talk to you later.

Steve


Hello Winston:

I am being held captive by a girl in Cagayan de Oro who probably would like me to stay here the whole time. I have been here almost three days, and I am ready to head to Cebu. I got sick over the past 24 hours, and have been urinating black crap out my butt. It must be the food because what else could it be, right? Things here in the Philippines are great, but some are not so great.

The prices at the mall on almost everything are more expensive when you break it down actually. For examle, a bottle of Versace Blue Jean Cologne costs about 57 American dollars, where in the U.S. it's about half that. The lady at the counter saw me react to this price and she must have known I was shocked. Also, restaurants are not cheap in comparision to a person's salary. Eating out and gonig to the mall is definitely a luxury item for Philippinos making 200 pesos a day (about 7 or 8 American dollars).

Anyway, back to this girl. I feel that she clings to me like flies on fresh cow manure. I don't know what to do, but once I get my check-up for this awful thing I have in my stomach, I am heading out on a communter flight to Cebu. I want to visit a couple women there and also approach women at the mall. How can I do that here when I have this woman watching me every friggin' second? I feel like a hostage at times, even though I know she is sweet and just wants a nice man in her life.

Ok, enough of that. I need to go now but I will keep you up to date and posted. I have not gone to Angeles City yet, but I may or may not. It depends. I need to be careful not to fall into the typical trap that most sexual tourists do. I am here for the experience of love, not just raw skin.

Talk to you soon.

Steve


Hello Winston:

It's great that you have been patient. I am now in week two of my vacation in the Philippines and must say that it's going real good,

When I get back to the states, I am going to post on our site. I really think the time has come. I need to post my observations of my experience of the Philippines thus far. Most of my experiences are positive, but there are some negatives as well. In any case, you and I are both of the opinion that the grass is generally greener on the other side of the United States as far as social connectedness is concerned.

I have thought a lot about you Winston, and most of your observations about expat life and life in America are spot on. You truly are a man of wisdom. You're the most philosophically-minded Asian guy I have ever met.

Anyway, I have to go now but I will contact you again soon. I just got back from a 3-day trip from Cebu City. What an experience that was.

Talk to you soon.

Steve


Hello Winston:

I read your posting and rather than post directly to it, I thought that I would just give you my two cents.

Angeles City is a cesspool of total misery. I never went there in my during my two-week trip, and seriously, I had no plans to either. The women there are all gimme-gimme types that are only out for one thing: your wallet.

I met a nice girl in Cagayan de Oro and one other in Cebu. Seriously Winston, I refuse to make foreign travel strictly about sexual tourism. I didn't get go to the Philippines to meet prostitutes. I can find that in America. I went there to see the other side of the world, and that I liked. The scenery was beautiful too.

Maybe when you get a little older Winston, you'll realize that meeting foreign women is not about partying and sex, it's about getting what you deserve as a man, and that's a beautiful woman that you can love, be nurtured by, and grow old with. Someone that will have true meaning in your life. Looks fade, but if done right, love can last a lifetime. Maybe even an eternity.

In closing, I will say this. I may never visit Angeles City. I had no intentions six months ago, and I surely don't think I have intentions now.

Talk to you soon friend.

Steve


Hello Winston:

I must agree with you on this one totally. When I was in the Philippines, I too noticed that people who are somewhat middle class hang only around other Philippinos and not foreigners. It's a cliquish thing that struck me. Ladislav never talked about this at all. He made it seem as if any woman there was dying to meet a nice, handsome, foreign guy which simply wasn't the case. Ladislav had me stay at this pension house that was a total flop, and at no time did any of the girls at the desk act friendly or say hello. I was so turned off by this Winston.

When I went out alone to the restaurants (mainly the fast food ones that most Philippinos cannot afford), I too noticed this cliquish attitude with these people. None would engage me in conversation, and that really hurt. The only way you can meet these women Winston is to take a laptop computer with you, and make sure you email as many females as you can in the area that are on the Filipina Cupid singles sites. Then, there are prospects right there. But, I never felt as if women there just wanted to swallow me up and take me in their arms.

Things have changed a bit I am sure, but the general rule is this: seek out women who are economically disadvantaged and not basking in materialism. If you do, you will have luck. Otherwise, you will be stuck all by yourself, lonely in your apartment or hotel room. Had it not been for one nice Filipina I met in Cagayan de Oro, I am sure my trip would have been much lonelier.

Talk to you soon.

Steve


Hello Winston:

Once again, you make a very astute point about the Philippines. It's as if as long as they have money, they want nothing to do with you as a foreigner. But, if they are destitute and poor, then you are the magic knight on a white horse coming to their rescue, particularly the women.

I am sad that this was my experience, but it was. You really have to be strategic when you're out and about trying to meet women in the Philippines. You have to go to poor areas, not upwardly more progressive ones. When I was in Cebu, I stayed a few days at this place in downtown Cebu City. The place was very busy, and there was a mall just across the street. You are right, as long as these people are making money and spending it freely, it's as if they don't need to socialize with foreigners, even Americans for that matter.

When I met the one women in Cebu, I had to have a cab driver take me over forty miles outside the city to a poor part in order to meet a woman that actually wanted to be with me.

Once again Winston, you are a genius, and you once again make more valid points. Keep up the good work.

Steve


Hello Winston:

I have to comment further about the whole leech mentality of Filipinos. In only two weeks, I learned so much about them, almost to the point where I am thinking that you are right in that they are shameless leeches lacking very little pride. When you meet a woman, she never just goes out alone with you. She brings her whole entourage. And she has no shame about it either. And you are right in that if you promise a Filipinos a gift, they not only will accept your offer (unlike us, "you don't have to do that"), but they will also hold you to your promise as if "you own it to me".

I think the Philippines is nice in that the weather there is beautiful, and if you manage your money right, you can get a 3 to 1 advantage over it. However, computers there are extremely expensive, as is fast food and beer. Comparatively, a can of beer there costs 30 pesos in the supermarket, which amounts to 75 American cents. That's about what you pay per beer when you buy a 12 pack of beer in the states. In fact, even less than that. Most electronics there are expensive. A laptop computer that costs $600.00 here in the U.S. will easily cost $900.00 there, and to Filipinos, that's like buying a very expensive used car.

Also, where the hell do these Filipinos that can afford Jollibee come from Winston? I thought that in the Philippines, most workers only make 200 pesos per day, or seven American dollars. How the hell can they afford to pay 150 pesos for a simple fast food meal? Also, fast food is comparatively the same price as it is here in the United States. For three American dollars, you can still get a value meal at some McDonald's restaurants. And there the price is the same. Go figure.

I will sum it up like this Winston: the Philippines is an anomaly to say the least. Larry Elterman made it seem as if things were cheaper there, and he is right. But, there are so many factors there I just don't understand. Will I go back there? Probably, but it's hard to say when.

Steve


Hello Winston:

I talked with Steve Neese and he said that his experiences were different, but after referring him to your article on middle class Filipinos, he agreed that there is a lot of truth to it. The problem is, he didn't experience all this because his main goal, like you, was to get sex in cities like Angeles City. I was there for other reasons.

What I am trying to say is, it's not as if women see you as an American or Westerner and are just dying to get to know you. In fact, most are not. You have to understand that Cherry Blossoms and Filipina Cupid are just small sub-segments of the female population that are poor and want a great American guy. That is my take on it. Overall, I still think people are more clanish, and they tend to only want to be around their own people.

No, I did not go to Cebu long enough to experience the whole "approach every woman" deal. But outside of Cebu, about 40 miles or so, I did meet a nice girl who was really into me. Of course, I did meet her onine and she was someone that I had pre-screened. I was on a time restraint, however, and didn't have time to meet her a second time. I took her and her cousins out to eat and it was a good experience.

I have some interesting ideas on how to live in the Philippines, however. It involves working your ass off six months out of the year, 12-16 hours per day, and then saving up enough to live there six months at a time. I have the ability to do that with my teaching and technical skills, and it's something I have seriously considered. Too many guys on your site are complaining that they don't know how to get work there, or they worry they won't be able to find it. My attitude is this: don't limit yourself to having a teaching English certification. That is not the only way to fund going to the Philippines. Plus, people like me don't have 4-year degrees, and it's more than likely a requirement if you want to teach there.

I would love to do an interview with you again. I still have Steve's from December. Maybe if I am not shy, I will put it up. But I am a bit reserved about it now.

Talk to you soon.

Steve


Hello Winston:

I have suspected all along that in order to be successful financially, you have to have multiple, passive sources of income to survive. Your site is soon going to be an income where you only need to put in ten hours a week or less, and you'll get easly 1,000 American dollars in consistent income. That is a big chunk of change for only ten hours a week, But, when you retroactively look at it, you put in tons of hours that you never got paid for, not to mention hosting costs.

I am going to do the same thing, but my strategy is that while I am earning a tiny bit of passive income, I'll need to be working full-force with my teaching. I would love to go to the Philippines, this time being more strategic and less woman-minded.

I love the weather there Winston. The islands there were also beautiful. I am sure my motivation just on the weather alone will get me back with for a long time in the next year or less. I already have money saved. The women issue will just be the bonus. However, I am not going to hang around tourist areas where go go girls hang out. They are suck leeches and it makes me wonder why men don't look for more conservative options.

Anyway, take care, and talk to you soon.

Steve
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Postby Rocky Top » Sun Oct 28, 2012 3:46 pm

I think I just got dumber by reading some of his rants. :?

He's all over the place. One moment, he's agreeing with you about how great it is, the next moment, he's agreeing with you about the "dark side" of the Philippines, yet when it is all said and done, i can't tell in his mind if he felt the good outweighed the bad or if he just had a terrible experience over there. I suppose if he's going back there to do some long term planning, that he must have liked it there. But man, it seemed like the the highs he felt there were highs and the lows he felt there were lows.
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Postby Jester » Mon Oct 29, 2012 12:29 am

jamesbond wrote:...radio talk show host Art Bell married a girl from the Philippines in 2006, when she was 21 and he was 61 and he said he has never been happier in his life and they just had a child a couple of years ago).


:D :idea: :D 8) :D
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Postby Winston » Mon Oct 29, 2012 3:13 am

Rocky Top wrote:I think I just got dumber by reading some of his rants. :?

He's all over the place. One moment, he's agreeing with you about how great it is, the next moment, he's agreeing with you about the "dark side" of the Philippines, yet when it is all said and done, i can't tell in his mind if he felt the good outweighed the bad or if he just had a terrible experience over there. I suppose if he's going back there to do some long term planning, that he must have liked it there. But man, it seemed like the the highs he felt there were highs and the lows he felt there were lows.


I don't understand your complaint. How did that make you dumber? His observations were realistic. The Philippines has pros and cons and he described them accurately. How does that make you dumb? That doesn't make sense. If you went there, you'd see the same thing. What he described is very obvious.

Steve also complained about me doing the same thing, that I was saying good things about Russia and then the negatives as well. Why should one's comments be all positive or all negative? Reality is not like that. So I didn't understand the basis of his complaint about me either.
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Postby Falcon » Mon Oct 29, 2012 3:24 am

Thanks for posting these, Winston! I haven't heard from Steve Hoca in a long time, and was actually a bit worried about him. His insights are quite impressive.

Contrary to what Rocky Top has said, Steve Hoca strikes me as a sharp and organized guy who observes the pro's and con's of the Philippines very clearly and quickly. He wrote about the con sides almost right after he got to the Philippines, whereas it took Winston quite a while longer to do so. Instead of acting like it's all Dreamworld or Fantasyland, he is a realist who sees how the good and the bad sides all coexist with each other. I don't think even Larry Elterman is as willing to acknowledge the "real" Philippines.

Well done, Steve. I am really looking forward to hearing more from you.
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Postby Rocky Top » Mon Oct 29, 2012 1:14 pm

I guess the main thing that was confusing is that he seemed to be swinging from one extreme to the next in several of the emails. It was either really good or really bad. Again, I suppose overall he liked his experience there, else he wouldn't be making more long term plans. It just seemed that he was moving thru the full spectrum of emotions while there and in retrospect after he came back.
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Postby Exod » Mon Oct 29, 2012 2:36 pm

Winston wrote:Steve also complained about me doing the same thing, that I was saying good things about Russia and then the negatives as well. Why should one's comments be all positive or all negative? Reality is not like that. So I didn't understand the basis of his complaint about me either.


I absolutely agree. I don't understand why people always complain of lack of consistency in travel reports.

One should expect a consistent line of thought in a book, maybe an essay, but almost-realtime emails and reports shouldn't be expected to adhere to the same standards. During my travels I continuously flitted between loving whatever place I was visiting and hating it. It took me at least two weeks, if not a month to stabilize my thoughts somewhat. It's normal and expected. Heck, I do the same with my own country.

In fact I would be suspicious of someone who travels to a place he never visited before, especially a place different from the cultural standards he's used to, and sees only good things or bad things.
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Postby NorthAmericanguy » Mon Oct 29, 2012 3:05 pm

Enishi wrote:The security personnel in Detroit cut off a lock I had put onto my luggage and never returned it. I thought they had a special key they used to open stuff like that and then relocked it afterward. I guess not. :\

Does Steve Hoca live in Southeast Michigan as well?


You have to buy a TSA lock because those are the only locks they have a master key for. You can use a non TSA lock but if they have to go through your bags they're just going to cut the lock and destroy it.
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Postby Winston » Wed Oct 31, 2012 7:49 pm

Rocky Top wrote:I guess the main thing that was confusing is that he seemed to be swinging from one extreme to the next in several of the emails. It was either really good or really bad. Again, I suppose overall he liked his experience there, else he wouldn't be making more long term plans. It just seemed that he was moving thru the full spectrum of emotions while there and in retrospect after he came back.


Well the reason he wrote those cons of the PH is because I brought them up first. He is on my mailing list and read the negative cons of the PH that I wrote, so he was just expressing his agreement with my observations.
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Postby momopi » Thu Nov 01, 2012 2:34 am

My $0.02:

1. If you're spending thousands of dollars to visit another country for 2 weeks, you should NOT be typing up trip reports while you're there. Think of it in terms of how much you're spending per hour to be there, and what you should be doing to get your money's worth. You can always consolidate your thoughts and write a trip report after you return.

2. If you go to a developing country with first-world expectations, you will be disappointed. i.e. do not expect public toilets in China to be as nice as the ones in Singapore. If you want to go somewhere with Singapore quality public toilets, then go to Singapore.

3. If you don't like where you're at, vote with your feet and leave. Nobody pointed a gun at your head and forced you to be there. If you're too lazy to get off your butt, then don't blame other people for your unhappiness. Be happy that you can stand and walk, others stuck in a wheelchair are not as fortunate.
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Postby Falcon » Thu Nov 01, 2012 3:10 am

momopi wrote:1. If you're spending thousands of dollars to visit another country for 2 weeks, you should NOT be typing up trip reports while you're there. Think of it in terms of how much you're spending per hour to be there, and what you should be doing to get your money's worth. You can always consolidate your thoughts and write a trip report after you return.


That's what I did, even during my nearly two-month trip in China. In http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/view ... hp?t=15290 , I wrote:

Not much time to be arguing about trivial things, complaining about US women, or reading/writing threads, since I am busy hitting the road everyday!


And during my shorter trips to Mexico, I would hardly ever use the Internet, let alone get on HA.


2. If you go to a developing country with first-world expectations, you will be disappointed. i.e. do not expect public toilets in China to be as nice as the ones in Singapore. If you want to go somewhere with Singapore quality public toilets, then go to Singapore.


Toilets in rural China are literally holes in the ground. I was fine with that. I really liked the "camping out" feel of living in rural villages.


3. If you don't like where you're at, vote with your feet and leave. Nobody pointed a gun at your head and forced you to be there. If you're too lazy to get off your butt, then don't blame other people for your unhappiness. Be happy that you can stand and walk, others stuck in a wheelchair are not as fortunate.


Quite true. I enjoyed China and Mexico overall, despite the con's (which every country has).

You'll be one heck of a Taiwanese dad. :wink:
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Postby Winston » Thu Nov 01, 2012 9:44 am

momopi wrote:My $0.02:

1. If you're spending thousands of dollars to visit another country for 2 weeks, you should NOT be typing up trip reports while you're there. Think of it in terms of how much you're spending per hour to be there, and what you should be doing to get your money's worth. You can always consolidate your thoughts and write a trip report after you return.

2. If you go to a developing country with first-world expectations, you will be disappointed. i.e. do not expect public toilets in China to be as nice as the ones in Singapore. If you want to go somewhere with Singapore quality public toilets, then go to Singapore.

3. If you don't like where you're at, vote with your feet and leave. Nobody pointed a gun at your head and forced you to be there. If you're too lazy to get off your butt, then don't blame other people for your unhappiness. Be happy that you can stand and walk, others stuck in a wheelchair are not as fortunate.


You don't understand. We all want clean streets. But we don't like countries like Singapore where women are too picky, not as approachable, and not as open to strangers. That's no fun. So going there isn't a solution. You are forgetting why we are here. What's the point of having clean toilets if there's no romance, passion or special memories? Time just goes by and is wasted, like what I experience in Washington state and Taiwan.

What if you want clean streets, safe streets, first world comfort and friendly approachable women who like to flirt with you at the same time? Can you have both? Is there a compromise or middle ground? I think Eastern Europe or Central Europe may be a good middle ground. What do you think?
Last edited by Winston on Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:57 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby jamesbond » Thu Nov 01, 2012 11:44 pm

Winston wrote:What if you want clean streets, safe streets, first world comfort and friendly approachable women who like to flirt with you at the same time? Can you have both? Is there a compromise or middle ground? I think Eastern Europe or Central Europe may be a good middle ground. What do you think?


I have been thinking about this as well. From the research I have done, it seems like Germany might fit the bill. It has the fourth largest economy in the world, it's a very safe and clean country and the women are approachable.

In Germany, men do not ask out women, so the women are very open to the idea of meeting men while they are out in public places (unlike the US, where women do not want to meet men in public places).

Since men in Germany don't approach women, the women will approach men and a lot of women in Germany are single and available.

I will be visiting Germany in the near future and if I like it enough, I will look into getting a job and moving there. :D
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Postby Rocky Top » Fri Nov 02, 2012 4:39 pm

U
momopi wrote:My $0.02:

1. If you're spending thousands of dollars to visit another country for 2 weeks, you should NOT be typing up trip reports while you're there. Think of it in terms of how much you're spending per hour to be there, and what you should be doing to get your money's worth. You can always consolidate your thoughts and write a trip report after you return.

2. If you go to a developing country with first-world expectations, you will be disappointed. i.e. do not expect public toilets in China to be as nice as the ones in Singapore. If you want to go somewhere with Singapore quality public toilets, then go to Singapore.

3. If you don't like where you're at, vote with your feet and leave. Nobody pointed a gun at your head and forced you to be there. If you're too lazy to get off your butt, then don't blame other people for your unhappiness. Be happy that you can stand and walk, others stuck in a wheelchair are not as fortunate.


I agree with this. You should enter every new experience/country with a clean slate and lowered expectations. I've found that I do a better job of grading my experience once I've had a chance to get over the original shock/awe of wherever I've gone (as limited as that is right now). It is unrealistic as hell to expect to drop into Country X and expect 1st World infrastructure, seamlessly flowing bureaucracies and beautiful 20 y/o women dropping on their knees in front of you at the airport. Some people expect a fairy tale. At the same time, though, I read some of these trip reports and you see the opposite extreme. "Look out for Skinheads/beggars/shady bar girls/etc" or "the cab drivers suck and no one follows traffic rules"/"they hate Americans and I don't trust them"... blah blah blah. I mean, how hard is it to just give a fair, even tempered, trip report? I can understand it being overwhelming or underwhelming if you are someplace in the first few days. But don't shoot down a place because your bags got lost at the airport and you got food poisoning and don't hype up a place because you got a room for $50/night and a bar girl for $30/night.
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