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Not new...but should introduce myself

Introduce yourself here and let us know who you are.

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Not new...but should introduce myself

Post by chanta76 » November 2nd, 2010, 6:01 am


I'm not new been posting on and off . More like a lurker..than anything. Little bit of me...I'm 34 years old Korean male who lives in NYC.
I first heard of Winston Wu from other Asian forum sites. Even though Wu has allot of controversy I agree with some of his views.
I can relate to Wu position about how Asian men in America are marginalize in the dating scene. I mean for all the white guys here if you think you have it tough ....well Asian men in USA has it allot tougher ...

I did take a dating pua boot camp. I would say it did help me some but I find it after while too tiring ..it's too much of a game but hey this is USA and well we all know how the dating scene is like ..and yes I do agree it does SUCK.

So here I am ...checking out this site. Reading up on information and just trying to understand better. I did visit South Korea a number of times. I have my experience in South Korea and can tell the difference between New York vs Seoul...but as an aging (now 34 years old) ..I come a cross in my life. I think similar to many of you. I actually thought about relocating to South Korea....but South Korea is becoming more like USA. I think any country that values materialism , money, etc...has allot of the western decadents but....in some ways South Korea has some values that I like that USA does not have.

As a Korean-American man in Korea there is some plus and negatives that I will get that let say a white or black guy will not get and vice verser. I will write about that late.... But I guess in the end....I want what everybody else wants here.

Just to be happy and live a simple life. And well to be able to meet and date women easily instead of dealing with games or issues.

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Post by E_Irizarry » November 2nd, 2010, 5:31 pm


It's a pleasure to meet you. THank you for introducing yourself on here. Now here's the question that awaits a pending answer:

How would White guys be treated differently in SK as compared to how a Korean man would be treated in SK by his counterparts?

How would Black guys be treated differently in SK as compared to how a Korean man would be treated in SK by his counterparts?

Just inquiring minds want to know. :O)
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Post by ssjparris » November 2nd, 2010, 10:51 pm

hey there nice to meet you. hopefully life will improve for you even more with the idea of going abroad. check out france in the future. i heard they LOVE asian men.

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Post by chanta76 » November 5th, 2010, 11:25 am


I notice in your avatar that you used to live in NYC. We are almost neighbors . I grew up in Queens also but in Bayside which is close to Flushing.
But to answer your question...
Well first I have say this is just my observation. Doesn't mean I am right just my view points from my experience.

First how are Korean-American treated vs a native Korean. There is a difference. I didn't grow up in Korea and I cannot speak Korean well. To Korean people they have a narrow definition of what a Korean person is. If your mix -Korean , they might not accept you. Blood line is important to Korean people. It's different in the Philippines where it's more acceptable to be mix but not in Korea BUT I think times are changing with the media.

If your a over seas Korean like myself who grew up in America . There are some Korean people who might not accept me because I don't speak Korean well enough. BUT there are also some Koreans who would be interested in me because I grew up in America but less so now compared to the 1990's. I think it was more popular for a Korean -Americans in the 1990's and early 2000 because it was different. Plus for many Korean people they have this love hate relationship with USA and learning English.

Ok..how was I treated as a Kyopo (Korean -American) . For the most part I just blended in. If I kept my mouth shut I was treated like any other Korean person but if I tried to talk than I was treated somewhat different. I wouldn't say I was treated badly. Just little different but when it comes to kyopo's we are more and more common in Korea. So I think to native Koreans they are used to that. I think.

As a Kyopo I get all the advantage that a native Koreans get. So I guess that's the plus side. For native Korean men. Well...they have all the advantage in Korea. I get to the comparison part later.

Now for white guys. White guys have some advantage and disadvantage compared to a Korean men. First they are foreign. Korea is close society. (Although in the future that may change.) The only industry that a white guy has advantage is in Korea is the ESL industry. From my experience meeting ESL teachers and expats in Korea I find most of them are little weird. Korea is a drinking society where they drink heavily and I notice allot of the expats have a drinking problem. NOT all but many.

I would also say good portion of the expats do have Asian fetish. As an Asian men I am uncomfortable meeting white guys with Asian fetish but I did wanted to observe them if they had any advantage with Korean women.

OK here is the comparison chart. Again this is just my view points. If a white guy is young and good looking with decent social skills. He would have no trouble landing a pretty Korean girl but it's not like there be groupie of Korean girls knocking on his door just because his white. Some white guys have this view point that being white in Korea gives them immediate advantage. I used to think that too because back in the states I met a good number of Asian women who prefer to date white men but that's in the states.

In Korea there are some Korean women who given a choice if they had to date out it be white guys. The good news for white guys is that the expat population is small(but growing) and the number of Korean girls who prefer white men is well..its not the majority of Korean girls but like let say if the expat community is just (making up numbers ) 1% of Korea. You might have like 5-10% of the female population who wants white men. So by doing the math there plenty of Korean women for a white guy . I think. I could be wrong in this because I did meet white guys in Korea who couldn't get laid even if you put a gun to his head. But this is just my thinking.

Plus South Korea is small country. Most of the expats are in Seoul . I could even name the areas they usually hang out. It-taewon , Hong-dae, Gangnam, Agu-jung do. Usually does places and maybe Sinchon . So a Korean girl will know where these white guys hang out and go there BUT I notice that the Korean girls prefer the younger better looking white guys. This is not the Philippines.

Korean men on the other hand do jet jealous when they see Korean women with non-Korean men. But I don't think they get violent.

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Post by chanta76 » November 5th, 2010, 11:56 am

The advantage that a Korean men have and a Korean American guy would have ( if he speaks good Korean) is well the majority of Korean girls prefer Korean men. Most of the leaders in South Korea are Korean men. So that's their advantage.

(It's like how some white women prefer black guys but most white women prefer white men. I mean it depends. )

Sometimes a white guy may have an advantage because of his novelty if he can speak Korean well enough. If he can and his OK LOOKING (Korea cares allot about looks) they might put him on TV. Why? well...because in Korea it's different and because this is advantage that a white guy does have . Korea society looks up to success and status. That's why Korea is so crazy competitive. That's why Korea cares so much about status and back ground. Korea sees westerns countries as being strong and wealthy .(but this is changing too..)

That's why white people are treated better in Korea compared to some other expat groups like people from Nepal, Philippines etc..etc. It's status the same exact reason why given a choice a Korean women would prefer to date a white guy over a non-Korean /non-white guy. But still I notice that Korean men still calls the shots.

OK..black guys. Because of hip-hop. Because of basket ball. Within some circles in Korea . Black guys are cool. Mostly with younger Korean kids. I hate to say this. Korean people viewpoints of black people has been exported from America. So if America sees black men as being dancer, singers and basket ball players. To Korean people that's how they see it to. But with Obama ..I think things are changing.

Also with the ESL industry ...they prefer white people over black people. You have African expats (not American blacks) in Korea. Working there. I think with Korean people in general they might not be able to tell apart. It's like foreign is foreign to them

So what advantage does a black guy have. I did meet a black guy who was an ESL teacher. We spoke about the prejudice in the ESL industry but hey anything can be overcome if you work hard enough. In general speaking he liked it in Korea. I mean Korea is nice place to be in I think. I also met a black guy who was going to Yonsei University. He had a Korean girl friend. I asked him do Korean girls prefer dating out or prefer non-Korean guys. He said no ..

I think with black guys I just didn't have enough of sample to look at. What I do notice about these two black guys that I met in Korea was that they were both very positive , happy, and very friendly. So is it because them being black is what got them the job, girl ...or them being positive and happy go lucky?

But if you go to Hong-dae there is hip hop clubs. Again if your a cool black guy who might fit the hip hop stereotype (I think) there are Korean girls who look for that. So it's an advantage but also disadvantage ..... because what if that's not you.

Overall...not to sound bias even though I am Korean -American...I think white guys have higher advantage over black guys. White guys have some advantage over Korean men because of the novelty and being from a strong country like USA but overall Korean men still has the fullest advantage because this is Korea. I mean the leaders in that country is Korea. They look after their own. The only advantage a black guy has over a white or korean guy is the black stereotype.

I know it's sounds f***ed up. But if you live up to that black stereotype of being a dancer or whatever...within some Korean circle they will see you as a hero. I think....something tell me someone will disagree with me but again this is just from what I seen.

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Post by chanta76 » November 5th, 2010, 12:06 pm

Oh....I hope answer your question. I mean was mentioning about advantage but you were asking about treatment.
Well..I'm not white or black so I don't have first hand experience just from observing .

As a kyopo I was treated pretty good..better over there than in the USA.

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