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Want to ask for advice on how to leave the USA...

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Postby Winston » May 16th, 2008, 4:20 am

Dark, great advice and insights. I will share your advice with my mailing list so that the rest of them can read it, so your efforts don't go to waste here.

Can you post any pics of Thailand or its women here?

One of my advisors said that Thai girls are cold and only care about money, and that Thai people are introverted and prefer shy silent types. Is that true?

Is it easy to chat up girls in public?

You said Thais were Buddhists. Is it just like how most Filipinos are Catholics, yet most of them can't quote any Bible verses or talk about theology? Do most Thais even know the basic tenets of Buddhism, such as the Four Noble Truths? How can such a materialistic society be truly Buddhist?
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Postby DarkTalay » May 16th, 2008, 9:22 am


Can you post any pics of Thailand or its women here?

There are plenty of links to websites with pictures of Thailand and its women.

If a man can’t surf and find pictures of Thailand and Thai women he’s a basket case and would be beyond help.


One of my advisors said that Thai girls are cold and only care about money, and that Thai people are introverted and prefer shy silent types. Is that true?
Where are you getting all this disinformation from?
He’s making a broad statement that is true for a few Thai girls but not all.

Many Thais are living at a poverty level meaning more desperate Thais.

But not all Thais are out to rip off the tourist (despite the reports you’ll hear from a few).

Buddhism and the King are moderating influences.
The current King, Bhumibol Adulyadej, is the longest reigning as well as longest living monarch.
He is revered and beloved, he’s tirelessly worked for the benefit of the Thais and his love for Thailand is obvious. I’m not even Thai and can see this.

This means despite the grinding poverty the crime rate is much lower and people are much happier compared to say Jamaica.

You’ll find Thai girls who are cold bitches but most are friendly and will actually smile back at you when you pay them a compliment.
Yes, they care about money but most care how good a heart you have (Jai Dei).
Being shy or extroverted has nothing to do with it.

If you do take a Thai girl out however since you are the “dominantâ€￾ party you’ll pay for everything.
However food, entertainment is cheap compared to the West.
Conversely if your immigration lawyer takes you out to dinner, he will pay for everything as he has to maintain face and he’s the dominant party.

The Thais in general prefer well-behaved men who make an attempt to speak the language and respect the culture and the King.

Take advice from most tourists or expatriates with a grain of salt.
I see too many of them being nothing but rude boors who get away with their foul behavior because of their economic power and then wonder why the Thai are not respectful.
A lot of tourists and expats who get assaulted by Thais set themselves up by either cheating Thais or insulting Thailand or the King.

Is it easy to chat up girls in public?
Falling off a log is harder.
Thailand is heterosexual male friendly.
The women respect men unlike the States.
A newcomer to Thailand must remember he’s in different part of the world with different rules of behavior.

I see many men who are disabled, disfigured or with massive birth defects who would not get the time of day from a typical Western woman(except as a “pityâ€￾ object on “Jerry’s Kidsâ€￾) with beautiful Thai girls.

Yes, it’s partially commercial as he’s probably paying her bills but ALL women want a man to do that.

For men who are married or involved try telling her you want to quit your job and go find yourself, see how long she sticks around.
You said Thais were Buddhists. Do most Thais even know the basic tenets of Buddhism, such as the Four Noble Truths? How can such a materialistic society be truly Buddhist?

Thailand is truly Buddhist, it is no more materialistic than most other countries.

“Merit-makingâ€￾, i.e. giving offerings to monks or their temples is common.
There’s a lot of hypocrisy obviously (thieves using acid to steal gold coverings off Buddhist statues, human trafficking, drug smuggling) but Thailand would be unlivable if not for its belief in Buddhism.

BTW be wary of what most Western women say about Thailand and Thai women.

From what I’ve read, heard and seen, Western women hate Thailand, despise Thai women and any foreign man who dates them.

You’ll get nothing but disinformation and outright lies from most of them who’ve never been to Thailand.

Again beware of what you’ll read in mainstream travel guides.
They are written for back-packers, rich couples, Gays, Lesbians and women not for the single heterosexual male.

“Lonely Planetâ€￾ and “Rough Guideâ€￾ in particular has much inaccurate information and very slanted against heterosexual men.

A travel writer recently admitted making up much of what he wrote and getting information second-hand from his Columbian girlfriend: ... 746887.ece ... re-a-sham/

“Rough Guideâ€￾ claims that eating out in Pattaya is “dearâ€￾ and will cost you plenty. I’ve been here for several years and can tell you that the food here is no more expensive than in Bangkok and sometimes cheaper.

“Lonely Planetâ€￾ claims that there are brothels of African men ready to service Japanese female tourists in Pattaya.
Well, arrests of foreign hookers are loudly publicized regularly and if there is such a service for Japanese tourists I’ve not seen any mention of it on any on-line forum or in the local media.


Last edited by DarkTalay on May 17th, 2008, 10:08 am, edited 2 times in total.
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I left 5 years ago...

Postby Mr S » May 16th, 2008, 7:32 pm

I got fed up with the states and knew what direction it was heading with Bush elected, so I finally left.

It's correct most people just talk but don't walk the walk. They are afraid to step out of their familiar prison confinement in the USA to experience a possible better lifestyle overseas.

It's certainly not for everyone but its a lot easier then people think to do. I think I have more individual freedom as an American living overseas then I ever did living in America. People don't realize how much the USA has turned into a nanny state until they leave the states and live overseas for a while.

In regards to which Asian country is a better place to visit, live and experience the culture and woman, I find Thailand and The Philippines to be the two best places for westerners.

They both have their pluses and minuses, think it boils down to your own personality and which culture you feel you fit in with better and can deal with. The Philippines is a bit more westernized and they generally speak English in most places. A guy can carry on a rudimentary conversation with the woman there, unlike in Thailand. One big difference I notice between the two woman is that Thai woman are a bit more emotionally crazy and will become erratic and violent in a relationship if they feel slighted. I think its because they tend to hold their emotions within and not express them. They then finally build up until they boil over and explode.

When I lived in Thailand i met far more crazy woman there then I have in the Philippines. Thai woman are much more focused on money than Filipinas although they are woman and with all woman it comes into play eventually in any relationship.

I'm not nesescarily saying Filipina woman are better, I've just had more negative experiences with Thais then Filipinas overall. Although I do find Thailand to be much more fun to live or vacation in then the Philippines.

Personally I would not marry or get into a serious relationship with either nationality, they are good just for casual short-term relationships or fun. The whole family structure becomes a problem and will drag down your relationship eventually.

If you do want to get into a relationship with one you have to meet a middle or upper class woman whose family has money. If you get suckered into a relationship with a poor woman, no matter how hot or nice she is, her family will always have some new money problem that YOU will be expected to solve. You will always be diverting part of your income to her family in one way or another. Every guy I've met that hooked up with a poor girl regardless if she was from a bar or regular job has to deal with her family bull shit.

Winston's problems with his GF's family is a prime example of this, and his problems are actually nothing compared to other guys I have talked to.

Guys, make sure you always think with the big head and not the little one! :lol:

Every hot chick in her 20's will get old and less desirable as she ages, if you only go for looks and don't consider other aspects of her character, you will get burned in the future...
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor and stoic philosopher, 121-180 A.D.
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Postby Think Different » May 11th, 2010, 2:07 am

This topic appears to have gone cold, but I wanted to give John (if he's still around) a couple thoughts about going abroad. Since the time he wrote, saying he had no formal education beyond HS, and only $1500, I am curious if his situation has improved.

John, you said that you don't want to teach English overseas, but I've done it too, despite the fact that I don't like it. In many places I just found jobs teaching conversational English, which amounted to basically speaking with people and getting paid. And that was in Europe.

Now a couple places I would NOT advise going, without a college education or TESL certificate: Western Europe or any of the expensive 1st world nations, such as Japan). Europeans tend to all be highly educated and frown on non-educated people, including their own. Just a warning. Those societies can be a little more focused on social class, which is (in their eyes at least) directly associated with education.

With $1500 bucks you can barely buy a round-trip ticket somewhere far away, such as to a nice comfortable 3rd world nation, where education is not such a big deal, and the costs of living are lower.

Have you thought about Mexico? You could actually just drive there and teach English or do PC repair or whatever, PLUS have the option of coming back to visit the family at Christmas and such. Mexico is a very popular locale for retiring Americans and the Mexican ladies are wonderful and feminine. You probably won't get a huge salary there, but again, probably enough to live modestly and enjoy life a little more fully.

Just a thought, for whatever it's worth.

Good luck!
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Postby Winston » May 11th, 2010, 8:35 am

DarkTalay wrote:Guys,

Momi said:

I've been through about half a dozen countries in Asia, but have yet to visit Thailand. The closest I've been to is Malaysia.

Sounds like I need to visit Thailand some time.

Thailand is different from Malaysia.
Malaysia is mostly Muslim, Thailand is mostly Buddhist.

My itinerary would be to spend a couple of days in Bangkok.

Bangkok is crowded, dirty and polluted but is incredibly

alive, dynamic, fun and fascinating.

Then I'd go up-country to Chiang Mai and see the Golden Triangle.

Perhaps a side trip to the Isaan region to see Khorat and then down to the
resort of Pattaya.

That will give you a generally good idea of what Thailand is like.


Religion has little to do with any differences. The Philippines claims itself to be Catholic for example, yet most people there are completely materialistic, not spiritual. And furthermore, most people there don't know any Bible verses, not even the most famous one, John 3:16. And greed has no limits there too. So much for being a Catholic/Christian country.

What differentiates countries are its culture, mentality and style of expression, among other things.

Note: It's too bad DarkTalay isn't here anymore. I emailed him recently to invite him back, but he basically told me to "piss off". I guess some expats are just "erratic". lol
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

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Postby FuzzX » May 11th, 2010, 11:44 am <-- Cruise ship work.
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Postby ajushi » May 20th, 2010, 2:24 pm


I see 3 themes ın the threa:

1) Fear: Yıou have many self lımıtıng belıefs and reasons for why you cant do ıt. Thıs fear and restrıctıve comfort zone ıs the only thıng stoppıng you.

2) Certaınty: There ıs none out here. Overcome your fears and free your mind. See opportunıtıes and act on them when they appear. Irt could be teachıng englıshö ıt could be workıng for a non profıt, ıt could be volunteerıng at an NGO, ıt could be busquıng on the street as a musıcıan, ıt could be workıng and lıvıng at a hostel

3) Purpose: If you go on taxpayer dollars, whıch you are talkıng about, then dont feel bad about ıt. Just bear good fruit. That ıs, make good use of yourself, do somethıng productıve for the communıty when you get wherever you are goıng. Give back to society.

What you are talkıng about doıng ıs radıcally outsdıde of socıal norms. Do not expect a lot of encouragement or support or even understandıng from Amerıcans. If you feel the callıng to go abroad, then do ıt and make sure you are doing it for good reasons.

Dont look to us for answers. You have to go out and do ıt yourself and see for yourself what ıt ıs lıke and what you are dealıng wıth.
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