Filipina suddenly ignoring me

[Zambales]

Hello,


1) I want to know what the problem is, and I feel shunned that instead of confiding in me, she is ignoring me. Do I try to contact her and explain that I would like some compromise? It's been two months, and I get NOTHING from her.


4) Do I just simply forget it?

Can someone provide some insight and advice?

Thank you, I greatly appreciate it.

Short answer: 'Next' her. Move on to the next one. It doesn't matter why she went silent. There is nothing unique about strategy for filipinas. This applies to all women.

You should either have at least 10 who you are talking to, or firmly not give a shit what happens if you are only talking to one.

I agree too.

[pete98146]

You sound like a very nice and considerate guy. Things like this happen when your "supposed" woman is half the way around the world. I don't think you've done anything wrong. Filipinas LOVE attention and either some other guy has visited her or she has a new Filipino bf and you are now on the back burner.

I met my wife online and before I met her, I went thru a few "hiccups" as well. It's almost to be expected. But you learn to move on and don't give up. Half the battle is that you are online trying. Eventually you'll find the right one and it will work out for you. You need to stay strong and remember that you have the upper hand with these girls. Many more Filipinas wanting to meet western guys than western guys wanting to meet Filipinas. Use this to your advantage!!

[Blue Murder]

Here is what you need to say to her. Listen for 0:11.

[Ghost]

.

[Virgo Rising]

That's why you need to have multiple 'threads' open, especially online . Guys from the chumpzone can be a little naive, myself included but I've learned a lot the hard way after the years.
Having said that, you can't expect them to wait so long for you without them even really knowing you, and that's understandable IMO.

A couple of the girls here in Vietnam are putting pressure for me to go to their respective cities right away;
i know if i don't show up pretty soon i'll be in the dust bin I'm finding logistics to be getting in the way, as time always goes faster than you expect.

Dust bin is right. And I believe I was the victim of exactly what you said....logistics. I courted this woman for quite some time, and although I do understand that she can't wait around forever, it's the sudden disappearance after she said she was still wating. Lesson learned, and I think online dating from a distance is just not feasible unless logistics are in place and solidified. I just would have liked at least a "goodbye" or something, instead of sheer sudden silence. I find it pretty crappy.

[Virgo Rising]

What province is she from? Its my observation men have more "problems" with Luzon women than the rest of the country.

She was from Luzon. So, perhaps that seems to be a stigma that is holding true.

[Virgo Rising]

You sound like a very nice and considerate guy. Things like this happen when your "supposed" woman is half the way around the world. I don't think you've done anything wrong. Filipinas LOVE attention and either some other guy has visited her or she has a new Filipino bf and you are now on the back burner.

I met my wife online and before I met her, I went thru a few "hiccups" as well. It's almost to be expected. But you learn to move on and don't give up. Half the battle is that you are online trying. Eventually you'll find the right one and it will work out for you. You need to stay strong and remember that you have the upper hand with these girls. Many more Filipinas wanting to meet western guys than western guys wanting to meet Filipinas. Use this to your advantage!!

Thanks for the compliment. Yes, my intentions are legitimate. And, I'm glad you brought me to a new realization about having the upper hand in this way of dating. This was my first time ever dating in tis way, so yes, I have learned a valuable lesson by this. So, now I don't feel as discouraged.

[Virgo Rising]

Here is what you need to say to her. Listen for 0:11.

LOL. Nice. Thanks for the laugh!

[Virgo Rising]

Thanks everyone for your insights and advice. I greatly appreciate your comments on this. I feel a lot better. As this was my first time every dating like this, I've learned a lot from this experience, and from your replies in this thread. Thanks to you all.

[pete98146]

You sound like a very nice and considerate guy. Things like this happen when your "supposed" woman is half the way around the world. I don't think you've done anything wrong. Filipinas LOVE attention and either some other guy has visited her or she has a new Filipino bf and you are now on the back burner.

I met my wife online and before I met her, I went thru a few "hiccups" as well. It's almost to be expected. But you learn to move on and don't give up. Half the battle is that you are online trying. Eventually you'll find the right one and it will work out for you. You need to stay strong and remember that you have the upper hand with these girls. Many more Filipinas wanting to meet western guys than western guys wanting to meet Filipinas. Use this to your advantage!!

Thanks for the compliment. Yes, my intentions are legitimate. And, I'm glad you brought me to a new realization about having the upper hand in this way of dating. This was my first time ever dating in tis way, so yes, I have learned a valuable lesson by this. So, now I don't feel as discouraged.

Shoot me a PM and I can help you with strategy on finding a good one.

[savguy73]

Thanks for the tip. I think my days of courting online are over. It's too difficult that way.

I am not sure you need to quit all together. But I do agree with other posts that you should make connections online shortly before you travel. It is difficult for interest to last if you will not be meeting each other.

[MrMan]

Hello,

I wanted to get some advice. I have been courting a Filipina for quite some time. We met through a dating website (yes, i know...online...but still). Anyhow, she suddenly started ignoring my calls and texts out of the blue. Two months ago was the last time we spoke on the phone and she said she was still waiting for me. She has said I am her soulmate, she loves me, and can't wait to meet me at the airport when I get a chance to meet her, etc. After that, she started to ignore my calls and my texts. We'd text each other throughout the week, and talk on the weekends. At the end of October, she told me she has a problem with her health. She got lab results on a follow up physical that she told me were not good, and she wanted time to think, and she is sorry she was ignoring me. She said she misses my voice and will call me soon. I feel awful, and worried sick about her. But, I feel stuck. On the one hand, I want to respect her privacy, but I also want to know what the problem is, and don't like that she is ignoring me. So, my dilemma is this:

1) I want to know what the problem is, and I feel shunned that instead of confiding in me, she is ignoring me. Do I try to contact her and explain that I would like some compromise? It's been two months, and I get NOTHING from her.

2) I sent her a b-day card. That is normal for me to do, and normally she thanks me and takes a pic, and sends it to me. Still, nothing.

3) How soon is "soon" as in "I'll call you soon?" It's been two months already.

4) Do I just simply forget it?

After hearing the soulmate, waiting for me, love you....now suddenly nothing...I am wondering how to handle this situation. I am worried, and angry at the same time. Does anyone have experience dating Filipinas who have experienced being suddenly ignored? Is this normal in their culture to do so? I understand the health issue, but the problem I am having is that she hasn't mentioned anything to me about what it is, or how she is doing. Just silence. I don't quite know how to take this sudden change in behavior. I would think that if we are supposedly soulmates, and she is still waiting for me (her words), that she would WANT to talk to me. So, I'm very confused. Can someone provide some insight and advice?

Thank you, I greatly appreciate it.

She could be further along in her relationship with another online boyfriend. or maybe she can't afford to use the Internet, doesn't have time, or has been forbidden from doing so.

Do you send her money? If not and she hasn't hinted, she may not be a scammer. But she may be playing the Internet field.

If a man flies to the Filippines, the girl will know he's serious. But if you aren't getting any responses, you probably don't want to fly there. Maybe you could send her something about the idea of your going there and see if she responds.

[Virgo Rising]

No, I never sent her money, nor did she ever ask. So, she was legitimate. As it turns out, I just found out she got engaged. So, yes, you were right on about another courtship. Thanks for the input.

[Virgo Rising]

I am impressed with all of your answers to my dilemma. As it turns out, I did discover that she is now engaged....unfortunately, not to me. I had a very difficult logistics issue with my courtship with her, and I have to admit, I'm very broken up about it. I know I have to keep things in perspective....and "keep it real" so to speak. But, I have learned that online courting without proper logistics doesn't work. All of you were dead on with your assessment of my situation, especially the "problem with the health" excuse. I don't know if I'm more angry at my own logistics problem during this, angry at the fact that she is marrying someone else without having had the chance to meet her, or if I am angry that she lied about the health issue and never even said goodbye, or anything. AAARGH. Anyhow, thanks again for your assistance with this. I have learned some valuable lessons.