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How's it going everyone! I shouldn’t have to tell you that, I'm done dating American women, and I'm very upset it took me so long to see the light! It took me years of unhappiness to realize most American women are all the same. Basically a nice guy, putting in so much effort for little yield. Trying to constantly please them and make them happy, and often playing their games. To an extent. When you beat them at their game (using intelligent confidence calling them out on their behavior/double standards), than I'm a jerk who, "just doesn't understand a woman". I love when American women use that excuse for their terrible behavior and horrible mindsets.
The reality about me is, I've known what type of woman I've desired for a long while now. Maybe she's in this country (America) and maybe not. But I'm on a search to find her and my happiness. For me, China interests me the most. I've always had a big interest in the culture of China. I've been using Chinese focused dating sites for a while now. But my results have been really underwhelming. I came in contact with more than a few Chinese women on the sites but, they end up fading for some reason. I was talking with this one girl from Liaoning for about 8 months. It started strong, we talked everyday. I even began learning Mandarin (still just beginning of course haha) because of her. I told her I will come see her during my Christmas vacation time. She was very excited as her mom is really putting pressure on her to find a husband. I understand. But, the last 2 months, she's put me on the side burner. I was/am sad, but I can't let it discourage me any longer.
To my surprise, I came in connection with another woman. She is from Chengdu. Interestingly enough, Chengdu is a city that I have great interest in! Sichuan cuisine is one of my favorites. Like, seriously I also heard the locals aren't nearly as materialistic like Shanghai and Beijing. Especially the women. But, she isn't as cute as I thought at first (I believe she used a picture from a little earlier in her life ha). She looks different in her updated pics she sent me. But, she is a good girl and seems to have a good heart. Maybe I sound shallow. But I’m just keeping it honest. I would like to see more options out there! Btw... I only contact women who seem serious via their profile. They ask me what I am looking for. And I'm always straight forward with them. My ultimate goal is to get married and start a family. To just be happy. I’m a simple man. And I don't need a smokin hot Chinese wife! Or some cliche ‘subservient’ girl. I just want a girl-next-door cute woman with solid values, who's genuine (good heart), honest, wants a balanced relationship, appreciates the small and simple things life has to offer, and is engagingly fluid (likes to have some adventure/fun). Again, I'm a simple man.
I am a Black man, so I realize there are some hurdles or even mountains (lol) I will have to conquer. I refuse to let that discourage me! Something I've noticed is many Filipinas contact me through the Chinese/Asian dating sites I use. I gave it a chance, I'm not stupid! A cute foreign woman, no matter the country, shows interest in me... I will most certainly give them the time of day. But the Filipinas turned out to be just scammers. Over and over and over. Asking me for money at some point.
So here's my situation. I've seen the "countries that love Black Men" post. But here's what I know about myself keeping it real. China is #1 to me. That is my desired choice because of the overall culture, food and women. Next, the Philippines does peak my interest a bit. And so does Vietnam! But I've just had bad connections with Filipinas as I’ve stated above. And also, it seems that the cuisine in the Philippines, well the consensus is, not so great! Yes, food is big to me in terms of happiness. I'm a major foodie! I'm also a Chef...so it's how I'm wired hahaha. Besides that, who doesn’t like great food! My whole point is, it’s not an absolute deal breaker, but food is tied to happiness. And I haven't even tried Vietnamese dating sites yet. But I really want to. I just don't know how socially open they are?!
So ok, my questions are...what do I do from here on in? Where should I look or go (or other dating sites)? How do I go about finding my desired woman? There are a fair amount of Chinese women where I live. I live in a major college city/town. So many internationals. But the main issue is I believe the single Chinese women I see, are mostly comprised of college students. Is the best way to just up and leave for China? How about Vietnamese women? Or should I just turn my attention to Filipinas? To be honest, I didn’t think it would be this crazy challenging. I thought, stop wasting time on American women, and go get the woman you desire. Find a solid Chinese focused dating site and I should find her with little problems. Well, it sounded simple enough haha.
Ok, please ANY guidance and advice would be much appreciated. I know I can find my happiness abroad if I just had guidance. Thank you very much for your time!