Return of the Jedi - Blunders and Insults to Intelligence

Post by **Winston** » December 7th, 2009, 7:23 am

Return of the Jedi - Blunders and Insults to Intelligence

Many Star Wars fans feel that the third film in the original trilogy, Return of the Jedi, ruined the Star Wars saga. I feel the same and find it a total disgrace and disappointment, for many reasons which I will outline below.

The film contains so many blunders and attempts to dumb you down, that the intelligent viewer feels like his intelligence is being insulted by the film. What were they thinking when they made it? Or rather, what was Lucas thinking? I can't ever fathom why some consider it their favorite Star Wars film.

Upon casually watching it again recently, I noticed many obvious blunders that do not make the slightest sense. Examples:

- Lucas doesn't know the difference between sand and ice, and apparently thinks we don't either. When Boba Fett fell near the monster pit at the beginning of the film, after being knocked over by a blind Han Solo by accident, he hit a sandy slope and then rolled uncontrollably into the monster pit, as though he were sliding on ice.

I wish I could take Lucas to the Colorado Sand Dunes and show him that sand is a very different surface than ice. When you hit a sand slope, you do not roll down, but immediately stop. In order to continue rolling, you have to make a deliberate effort to roll down it. Anyone who plays on sand dunes knows that. But Lucas assumes we are as dumb as he is.

- Apparently, Lucas thinks it's funny to kill off a highly skilled and efficient bounty hunter like Boba Fett by a silly accident, such as a blind Han Solo knocking his jet pack by accident during a silly cliched battle. Now that might be funny for a Road Runner cartoon, but for Star Wars? I think it'd be far more funny to have a Stormtrooper polishing his blaster with wax and then accidentally setting it off and killing Solo. Or better yet, have it accidentally go off and kill Lucas. Now that would be something the audience would find funny.

- And what was it with that scene where Princess Leia choked Jabba the Hutt to death with a chain? That villain was HUGE! Choking him to death with his own chain would be like trying to drag a truck or tractor with a rope. Are we to believe that Princess Leia was that strong? How dumb do you think we are George Lucas? A kitten playing with a ball of yarn has as much of a chance of choking YOU to death with the yarn, Lucas! If it were that easy to kill Jabba, someone would have done it years ago, before the Prequels even.

- Lucas obviously knows nothing about wars or military history. In Return of the Jedi, the Rebel Alliance did absolutely NOTHING special at all to win the war. In fact, technically they didn't win the war. It just looked like they did cause Lucas' script said so. In the climactic battle scene, the Rebel fleet was clearly outgunned, outnumbered, and outpositioned. They did NOTHING to overturn that. NOTHING at all! Think about it. Just cause they meet some furry creatures on Endor with sticks and stones does not in the slightest way change the outcome of the situation. Maybe in Lucas' imagination it does, but not by any basic logic.

In a battle, when one side has superior firepower and numbers, they can win in a head on battle without any special strategy. But if one is outgunned, outnumbered and outpositioned, like the Rebels were, they have to do something special and extraordinary to win. That's what Alexander the Great and Napoleon did repeatedly. When they were outnumbered and outpositioned, they found a way to win, through brilliant strategies and a well trained army that they inspired confidence into. That's how Alexander the Great beat armies of ten thousand with his own army of two thousand.

But the Rebel Alliance did none of that. They had no extraordinary strategies or charismatic inspiring leaders. Instead, they had funny leaders like Admiral Ackbar, and Luke, Han and Leia, who in this film couldn't even act. None of these characters were capable of pulling off any brilliant strategies or decisive victories. They were just dumb and lucky, like the Road Runner was. Not impressive at all.

- After the Death Star was destroyed again, there was still a whole Imperial fleet that could have easily finished off the rest of the Rebel fleet. So either way, the Rebels lost. The Empire technically and logically won that final battle, and Lucas gives no explanation to the contrary.

But no! Lucas wrote that they just ran away! He would have us believe that the Imperial fleet just ran off, which is a cheap cliche. It's one of those overused sci fi plots where an unstoppable army is simply turned off, deactivated or freed simply by killing the central bad guy or destroying the central computer. That's not how wars are won, that's how cheap cartoons are made.

In real wars, killing off an emperor or dictator may cause an Empire to slowly deteriorate, if its foundation is unsteady, as was in the case of Alexander the Great's Empire. But it doesn't cause an Empire to simply cease and the other side to automatically win. An Empire will usually move to quickly replace its dead leader. Also consider the fact that after Genghis Khan's death, his empire continued for hundreds of years more.

If we are to believe Lucas' version of events, then we should also believe that after the Japanese fleet bombed Pearl Harbor and destroyed most of the US fleet, that the remaining US carriers ran away and vanished forever, and that the US war industry never rebuilt their fleet, and the war ended with the Japanese jumping up and down like the Ewoks did, and that the US never retaliated for Pearl Harbor. Yeah right.

If we are to believe Lucas' version of events, we should also believe that when President Roosevelt passed away before the Japanese surrendered, that suddenly all US naval campaigns in the Pacific Fleet ceased and vanished, and the Japanese jumped up and down in victory as the Ewoks did on Endor. Yeah right.

Why didn't Lucas study basic events of WWII first?

Furthermore, why didn't the Empire disappear forever after the destruction of the first Death Star in the first Star Wars movie? Just cause the Emperor was killed? What a cheap shot. Technically the Empire should return for vengeance, so the war should not be over yet.

In any case, technically the Imperial Galactic Fleet is still there. Lucas never solved that problem. There is no logical or valid reason for the Imperial fleet to suddenly run off or disappear. There is also no reason to believe that the Rebels won that final battle. No evidence is given for it.

Now I have no problem with the Rebel Alliance winning, since they are the "good guys" but why not have them win in a more plausible, brilliant and impressive manner, rather than a dumbed down way that makes no sense?

Have them find a way for instance, to divide the Empire against itself and destroy it from within through corruption. Or slowly destroy its resources. Or gather up the largest army in the galaxy from an alliance of many planets and mount a D-Day like invasion.

Lucas may be a talented artist, but he's obviously horrible at strategy and logic, and I would bet that he couldn't even beat the computer a Chess on level one.

- Also, there was no way Solo and his team could have gotten into the Shield Generator control room like that. When Han tricked Imperial squads inside the Shield Generator to come out, and then surrounded them with Ewoks, that was a total suicide mission. In that position, the Imperial squads had laser guns vs. the Ewoks' sticks and stones, so technically, they could have just gunned them all down right there, including Solo. There's no reason that Solo was able to capture the Shield Generator.

Plus, it would have been more sensible for the Imperial troops to stay and guard the Shield Generator during the crucial and decisive space battle above, rather than going way out into the forest pursuing some Ewoks. No commander would have ordered that, for there is nothing to gain by chasing fleeing enemies when everything hangs on protecting the generator.

- Speaking of the Shield Generator, they are usually inside the ship, not projected from some planet. There is no logical reason to have an external one, which would pose as a weakness that the other side can easily exploit. So it should have been inside the Death Star.

Also, there is no reason why the Rebel fleet couldn't have just launched missiles to destroy the Shield Generator on Endor, rather than sending in a risky low probability ground force strike against it without even a plausible strategy.

Furthermore, there is no logical or strategic reason for Vader or the Emperor to willingly let the Rebel team land on Endor, just cause they assumed that their legion of troops were impenetrable. That is the kind of strategy used by James Bond villians and cartoons, not serious strategists.

- Why would the Emperor build a bottomless pit in the throne room of his Death Star, so that he could be thrown into it? Did Julius Caesar or Napoleon build a bottomless pit in their throne rooms, so that they could be thrown into it by their enemies for dramatic movie effect? So dumb and senseless, like Lucas. Doesn't Lucas realize that not everyone is as dumb as he is?

- After Luke defeated Vader, he faced the Emperor and threw away his light saber, for dramatic effect. But a sensible person would have kept it, just in case the Emperor decided to attack him. As shown in the Prequels, light sabers can be used to deflect the Emperor's lightning bolts. The wise Luke made himself vulnerable for no logical reason, other than for his father to watch him get electrocuted and change his conscience so he could throw the Emperor into the bottomless pit.

In summary, the film was a big disappointment, let down and total disgrace to the Star Wars saga. It leaves you hanging and wondering WTF? I wish Lucas or someone brighter would just remake it with a more sensible plot, outcome and way to end the Empire's reign.

Have them find a way for instance, to divide the Empire against itself and destroy it from within through corruption. Or slowly destroy its resources. Or gather up the largest army in the galaxy from an alliance of many planets and mount a D-Day like invasion.

momopi · Post by **momopi** » December 7th, 2009, 9:30 am

Star Wars is science fantasy and not science fiction. In space, spacecraft doesn't make swoosh sounds, but it sounds cool in theatres. Star Wars (1977) with its rear-channel audio effecs was a big push for theatres to upgrade their audio systems to Dolby Stero, and later Lucas would release the THX audio specs in the 1980s.

Star Wars is generally not considered science fiction among the hardcore sci-fan fans. But its technical and audio production was revolutionary for its time. During late 60's to early 70's there was a recession in the film industry, and many studios had laid off their special effects crew to save $. Star Wars brought back the SFX, which would advance to CGI in the 1980s -- see "Tron" 1982.

Post by **Winston** » December 7th, 2009, 5:06 pm

momopi wrote:Star Wars is science fantasy and not science fiction. In space, spacecraft doesn't make swoosh sounds, but it sounds cool in theatres. Star Wars (1977) with its rear-channel audio effecs was a big push for theatres to upgrade their audio systems to Dolby Stero, and later Lucas would release the THX audio specs in the 1980s.

Star Wars is generally not considered science fiction among the hardcore sci-fan fans. But its technical and audio production was revolutionary for its time. During late 60's to early 70's there was a recession in the film industry, and many studios had laid off their special effects crew to save $. Star Wars brought back the SFX, which would advance to CGI in the 1980s -- see "Tron" 1982.

That's not the point though. This film contains too many obvious logical blunders. Why can't they make intelligent villains? Instead, villians always have to be stupid, lack common sense and take unnecessary risks so that they can lose. Those are overused cliches. Look at how dumb the James Bond villians are. They try to kill Bond during the whole movie and when they finally have a chance, they just stand there and talk forever so that Bond can find a way to escape out of gunpoint. Why not have villains not make such mistakes and have the protagonists win by sheer plausible brilliance?

momopi · Post by **momopi** » December 8th, 2009, 11:13 am

Winston wrote:That's not the point though. This film contains too many obvious logical blunders. Why can't they make intelligent villains? Instead, villians always have to be stupid, lack common sense and take unnecessary risks so that they can lose. Those are overused cliches. Look at how dumb the James Bond villians are. They try to kill Bond during the whole movie and when they finally have a chance, they just stand there and talk forever so that Bond can find a way to escape out of gunpoint. Why not have villains not make such mistakes and have the protagonists win by sheer plausible brilliance?

The same could be said for Dr. Who. Why doesn't the Master just shoot him in the back with a sniper rifle? But that would make a boring show.

I watch old Gadzilla films for the bad English dubbing. Find your own entertainment.

Post by **Winston** » December 8th, 2009, 6:35 pm

Yeah well Return of the Jedi is worse than just cheesy cliches and predictability, because like I said, technically the Rebels never won the war at the end, but we are given the impression that they did, because in the Special Edition of the film, it shows Coruscant at the end celebrating over the Empire's collapse. Yet there is no valid reason to believe that it did or that the war was over.

That's like saying that after FDR died, the whole USA collapsed and Japan won the war, just because. Or because a few ships were destroyed in the US fleet, that the rest fled and the war was over. Doesn't work that way, except in Lucas' stupid imagination.

Mr S · Post by **Mr S** » December 9th, 2009, 1:57 am

You can't make a realistic movie in Hollywood nowadays cause it wouldn't sell. It's even worse today than when Jedi came out. That's why most movies nowadays have no characterization or plot, just mindless special effects for the most part to captivate the sheeple watching it. Lucas wanted to sell merchandise so that's why he geared it towards kids rather than adults. I don't think he ever envisioned the series to be as popular as he did when he first made Star Wars. I mean the newer first three movies were totally lame and even worse than Jedi ever was. We are never going to see decent movies anymore as long as the main objective is to create fast money within the first few weeks of a movies opening. They also want to get movies to DVD soon so they can rake in even more profits. Until some kind of new technnology comes along to enable people to make sophisticated movies with special effects easily, there will never be total freedom for writers and directors.

That new Avatar movie is supposed to be the first real sci-fi/fantasy movie taped using some kind of new 3D technology. I've seen the trailers for it and I'm not sure its going to be that good even if the Michael Cameron wrote and directed it. He still has to appease the man above him that gives him money to make the film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRdxXPV9GNQ

I don't even watch movies anymore, they all suck in my opinion and are a waste of my time.

Post by **Winston** » December 9th, 2009, 4:03 am

But what I don't understand is why the movie has to be dumb. Why can't it have good special affects, appeal to kids, be exciting, and make sense and have good plots all at the same time?

The prequels has complicated plots that depicted false flag operations where the Emperor funded both sides of conflicts to get himself more power. Conspiracy buffs have pointed out that they reflect US foreign policy and the NWO stuff. They were quite complicated for a children's show.

I saw the preview for the new Avatar movie. It looked very interesting and might even be good. A film doesn't have to be realistic to be good. But Return of the Jedi had way too many holes in it, and things which just didn't add up.

Mr S · Post by **Mr S** » December 9th, 2009, 6:27 am

I think they will be showing it at the IMAX theater at the Mall of Asia. I'm sure if you want to see it there you will have to buy tickets in advance. I went to that mall last weekend for IELTS examinations. I don't get what the big deal is about it. It's just like every other mall in Manila in my opinion.

The prequels were aimed at children more than adults. Yes they tried to interweave a complicated story but I don't think it worked all that well cause the characterizations sucked as well as the dialog between people. Plus scenes were to fast and quick changing to thoroughly enjoy the moment being created with a particular scene.

I'm just not really into watching new movies anymore cause they mostly just disappoint me so I feel I wasted hours of my life and money.

momopi · Post by **momopi** » December 10th, 2009, 10:42 am

There's a very good Japanese Sci-Fi series called 20th Century Boys:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/20th_Century_Boys

Like SW it's a trilogy of 3 movies, but I highly recommend reading the manga to get some background information before watching it. If you're too cheap to buy, there's always bit torrent *cough*.

I'm a big fan of Cyberpunk and can recommend Ghost in the Shell anime series:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ghost_in_the_Shell

The TV series, Stand alone complex and SAC 2nd GIG are all very good. The 3 movies may be difficult to follow if you don't already know the plot and characters. I've not read the novels so cannot comment on those.

For something completely different, best 2009 US film for me is Julie & Julia:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julie_&_Julia

If you grew up watching Julia Childs making omelette on PBS, you'd love the film. hehehe.

This is an excellent gift for your mother or anyone who enjoys cooking: