Why do asians love to stare rudely?

[Darknight]

Im asian myself living in an asian country and i still would get pissed off at random strangers staring openly at me at times.

The thing i noticed is caucasian people coming to my country for holiday they are much less likely to stare at strangers even its their first time here! So why such rude behavoir exist in asian societies even with all the confucious teachings??

[WilliamSmith]

LOL, what Asian country was it? They're not all influenced by Confucian teachings, but I don't remember reading anything in Confucius specifically about staring (and I am an admirer of Confucius, and have several translated versions of the Analects, even if I'm not in the Arthur Waley class).
In Japan I don't think they'd usually stare openly at a foreigner, if traditional standards of etiquette applied, though they might be curious. (Though one never knows with the younger generation.)
In China a lot of people are curious and more extroverted and direct about many things.
I wish I'd already travelled more extensively in Southeast Asia, but haven't done enough yet to have an impression on wonderful countries like Cambodia, Laos, or Vietnam.
Thai Chinese I had the pleasure of meeting had a nice relaxed vibe. (Not sure if it was a coincidence that all of them struck me that way, across the 5-6 I met.) None of them stared at me though.
I've met a lot of Taiwanese before and enjoyed spending time with them as a college student, but never been to that beautiful and unique island country and observed the native Taiwanese on their own home turf. If I read @Winston's analysis rightly, Taiwanese are allegedly all mindless and soulless automatons who are utterly incapable of any expression of human feeling, and possibly even lack human consciousness. (NPCs, as they say.)
Personally I noticed Taiwanese girls liked acting even more girly, as a general thing, even than other Asian girls, who tended to be pretty darned girly. For instance, balling both fists together and speaking the slightly more crisp and precise Taiwanese version of Mandarin in high-pitched squeals, and giggling a lot. They didn't stare at me either though.
@MrMan, do you have any input on this?
(MrMan lives in Indonesia married to an Asian woman, and may have more experience on these matters than a wandering "jack of all trades" like myself.)

[MrMan]

When I was in Korea, I'd wait at a red light to cross the street. A bus would stop and every eye on one side of the bus would be staring right at me. I ended up just ignoring people and not caring much what they thought.

In Indonesia, I'd occasionally see a single woman staring me, and then making eye contact. Most girls looked away. Some were rather bold about it. That was a rare thing. I remember eating at a little Korean food stall outside a mall in Kelapa Gading and the girl who worked the food stall just staring at me, making eyes at me. I was looking for a nice girl, and if a girl seemed to aggressive or too desperate, that was a turn off. I wanted someone who behaved normally socially or was a bit demure.


Most Indonesians don't stare like, Koreans, though, at least not in Jakarta.

[WilliamSmith]

When I was in Korea, I'd wait at a red light to cross the street. A bus would stop and every eye on one side of the bus would be staring right at me. I ended up just ignoring people and not caring much what they thought.

Thanks, I had a hunch you might have something to contribute on this topic. Maybe the OP is in Korea then.
On Quora, I saw a white lib expat whining about how Koreans didn't sit next to him on the bus and how he felt this theoretically constituted "racism," but didn't notice him mention the matter of staring.
I have no Korea experience, except getting a long with Koreans really well in the jewnited states (pretty much same for all other "Asians" in my day, though I've heard things have got uglier over the past few decades). I also noticed Koreans seem to be a little more on the macho side in some cases, which I consider a good thing. (P.S. to anyone interested, you might do a Brave search for "rooftop Koreans" for an interesting bit of history.)

In Indonesia, I'd occasionally see a single woman staring me, and then making eye contact. Most girls looked away. Some were rather bold about it. That was a rare thing. I remember eating at a little Korean food stall outside a mall in Kelapa Gading and the girl who worked the food stall just staring at me, making eyes at me. I was looking for a nice girl, and if a girl seemed to aggressive or too desperate, that was a turn off. I wanted someone who behaved normally socially or was a bit demure.

To each their own, but personally I love it when the aggressive man-eating tiger women launch straight at me and don't hold it against her at all, even if some might describe it as "desperate" (though I never would, bring it on ladies, LOL). It's definitely not an everyday occurrence, but has happened a few times with Chinese (who didn't just stare, but even approached to talk), and some other women over the years.

Chinese women and black women have the best flirting techniques to let you know they're interested, in my experience (though the sample is narrowed since any of those types of women interested in me were obviously in the sub-group that likes white men). I'm wandering off topic though.

[MrMan]

@WilliamSmith I remember another English teacher talking about how he hoped to keep that other seat next to him open on the bus so he could sleep, then a Korean makes eye contact with him as he/she gets on the bus and he knows he/she will sit next to him to practice English. So then it's 'Where are you from.... Do you like kimchi.... how many brothers and sisters do you have?'

I can't remember minding someone sitting next to me on the bus. I didn't ride city buses much, and the buses to Seoul had big seats. I didn't mind having someone to chat with next to me. Come to think of it, that's a potential interpreter too if there is an issue.

Were the expats complaining fat and hanging over onto the other seat? Did they have grumpy faces? Maybe Koreans who want to know English can learn it more easily now than in the 1990's when I was there or the culture has changed a bit.

I lived in a city of over 1 million, not Seoul, and there were a lot of English teachers, but a small fraction of the population, so some people had probably rarely if ever seen a foreigner in real life at the time.

As far as aggressive staring girls go, staring at someone is normally rude. If a girl were exceptionally pretty, I might have enjoyed the staring more. The girl at the Korean food outdoor place was just maybe slightly cute. But I also wonder if a girl is way too forward... not just friendly... is she like that with other men, too. But the annoyance was probably more with attention from girls I wasn't interested in. I didn't have girls chasing me all the time in the US, but I think I went up a point for looks in Indonesia for being foreign, white, looking different, standing out, etc. And I was at prime marrying age in a marriage-focused culture, too, so it seemed like a lot of single women had their eye on me.

Most Indonesian girls are kind of conservative, but young women can kind of look at men they like, make eyes, and be a bit middle schoolish about it. Or they can try to hide it a bit more. I think at that age I had just learned to pick up on the clues.

I was looking for a 'nice girl.' I was on a bus that wasn't that crowded, and this thin, okay looking girl who looked to be about 19 somehow ended up moving until she was standing between my legs. I didn't pursue it. Another girl on the bus asked me how I controlled my libido. Of course when I encountered an actual prostitute while going to the store in the front in a cheap motel... that I didn't realize also functioned as a by-the-hour place... while travelling, the prostitute hit on me. I didn't puruse these 'opportunities.'

A few years after getting married, I was sitting at an eye glasses stall at the mall choosing a selection. A rather attractive young woman also sat down diagonally across from me and started browsing. She asked the salesman a question. She sounded just like one of my sisters-in-law, but with a Betawi accent instead. (My wife says my sister-in-law sounded like a preman, a gangster. She has a raspy voice.) I told this girl that. She said in Indonesian, "I didn't know you were married." I hadn't even talked to her. She kind of gave away that she'd had interest by that not-thought-out comment.

I also saw a TV star, one of the ones I thought was the prettiest, ione of the few actresses on TV I thought was as pretty as my wife, just staring at me on this one-off trip a mall I don't think I'd ever been too. She was just staring up at me from the level below. I was married at the time, and so was she. I told some co-workers and they said her husband was an expat and they thought I looked like him, so maybe that was why. Then I felt bad for telling on the actress for staring, and kind of bragging about it, maybe. Later, that actress and this musician I met once had an affair and ended up divorcing and marrying each other. He was Indonesian. I'm glad I never met that actress.

But most Indonesians don't just stare, and the flirting making-eyes stare was rare when I was young and single. Most single girls that eventually seemed interested in me didn't do that. Ojek (hired motorcycle) drivers and street vendors would yell 'mister' at me to sell me cigarettes or rides. They'll look at you, but talk to you from 10 feet away, not just stare silently...which is just weird. If you look at anyone's merchandise or get near their fast food stall in Jakarta, they might do something like that or ask how they can help you from far away. Since Gojek, an Uber like app that serves ojeks became popular, motorcycle drivers don't usually talk to strangers to get business. They stare at their phones and look for customers.

I did date an Indonesian girl who struck up a conversation with me in the park in Korea for a little while. My wife was also friendly when I met her. Friendly is good.