In most places I've seen in America, you can easily go a full week without seeing one attractive girl. I've never lived in a city with a good supply of attractive women, but I know a few that exist in the U.S. While I am in the U.S., I will be staying in one such location.
Unfortunately, none of these places are walkable cities with history and things to do. Every single one (except some of the California beach towns) is car-driven suburbia and looks like this:
Long-term, I want to live somewhere more like this:
I love San Francisco and Seattle, but of course those places in particular are hell for single men. I'd be scared to even move there as a married man, given how much constant attention my theoretical wife would get, and given that my family would be constantly bombarded with a psychological warfare campaign to break us apart.
Right now, the feeling I have is excitement, like when I first left home for college. Of course at the time no one told me that my honor's English class in rural California was significantly better looking than the vast majority of America, and that I was walking into four years of Marxist brainwashing hell.
I find it pretty easy to make male friends anywhere I go in America, but I can't be a good friend when I am starving for female attention. All I do is get drunk and talk about my ex. I'm amazed people even put up with me. I think this is the cause of a lot of American male general hostility and douchiness. If I don't have what I need, I can't really be interested in other peoples' lives. I think American guys are overall cool, but they are like a starving man. The ones who do still maintain a good attitude, (and confide in me their complete cynicism), have an amazing amount of self-control that I lack.
I am looking forward to having fun and making new friends in a spontaneous way, where every day is an adventure, and you can have lots of random conversations and learn something new from others. I haven't really felt that way since the start of that massive letdown that was college. Honestly, I just haven't had much fun since high school ended, and I am not one of those people stuck in high school mode at all. There was just nothing to move onto since then, certainly not in my hideous-ass bay area school (same area that Winston grew up in, more or less).
It's funny how I can't really enjoy anything in life without women (attractive and nice ones). Concerts, skiing, hiking, and other activities are difficult to enjoy if you are missing the basic necessities of life. I'm so sick of the so-called manosphere's horrible advice to just "do what you enjoy" and not worry about women. That's such crap. That MGTOW nonsense is like the final control layer of the matrix. Right now, I have to fixate on the female problem or it will never get solved, but I am looking forward to it not being something I have to think about, so I can learn and grow as a person and not be stuck on this.
Emotionally, I am just shut down right now, and have been for a long while, but I can see a way out. It won't be instantaneous, but I feel like I am making progress.
