going to a swingers club is legit

[publicduende]

This doesn't make sense. Maybe these men have low sex drives or men on the side. Even if a man has low sexual morals, I don't get why a man would want his wife to have a side chick to satiate his wife's sexual desire and not expend it on him.

It can be for a number of reasons. Maybe the men is happy to see his wife's desire satisfied, plus he gets some kicks by fantasizing about her woman having sex with another woman. Maybe the gf is not entire homosexual and would let them indulge on a threesome from time to time.

Cases and nuances can be so many, it's difficult to explain. I am all for "live and let live", so long all of this is fully consensual and non-coercive/non-abusive.

I am a Christian. I am not Roman Catholic and was not raised Roman Catholic.

From what I hear, open marriages tend not to last.

Why would a man marry and put half of his assets at risk if he and his wife were just going to sleep around?

Sorry, I did not know what church you belong to so I assumed Roman Catholic. I don't know how your choice of (Protestant?) church impacts your world view and how it might related to that of a Roman Catholic.

From what I have seen, very few swingers are in open relationships. Open relationships, I agree, tend not to last, for the simple reason that the level of commitment from both parties is, by design, quite low.

Most people into this lifestyle are actually couples with several years of married relationship under their belt, kids and mortgages and the lot, who choose to bring something new and fresh (and maybe a bit risque, too!) into their sexual life. Again, there can be a million of reasons. So long none of these qualify as coercion/abuse or is meant to mentally or physically harm, I don't see why not.

[publicduende]

They can work out, but it's rare. Those that do work out, don't advertise they're open. They're super discreet about it. Like KGB levels discreet.

Most swingers are not in open relationships, though. They open their bedrooms and intimacy to other men, women and couples, or make their sex life more promiscuous and public by attending specific events at specific locations, but that doesn't necessarily means they stop committing to one another.

[MrMan]

They can work out, but it's rare. Those that do work out, don't advertise they're open. They're super discreet about it. Like KGB levels discreet.

Most swingers are not in open relationships, though. They open their bedrooms and intimacy to other men, women and couples, or make their sex life more promiscuous and public by attending specific events at specific locations, but that doesn't necessarily means they stop committing to one another.

If they are properly committed to one another they aren't going to commit adultery, and the fact that they are cool with it or try to be is even more messed up.

[publicduende]

If they are properly committed to one another they aren't going to commit adultery, and the fact that they are cool with it or try to be is even more messed up.

For one, I remarried a much more traditional Filipina who will never, and I mean never, consent to even share a kiss with another man or woman, so my opinion is only academic in nature.

This is a world your strong moral backbone isn't able to understand. I have only touched it a little, very tangentially and sporadically, only here in the Philippines, and it won't happen anymore. From what I have seen, couples who entertain the choice of opening up their sexual lives, are not necessarily weaker, or at risk of splitting up. In fact, the act of "controller adultery" that is swinging, is, if anything, an outlet for a woman or a man's inner desires. Once this stuff gets out of the system, what remains is a couple committed to their everyday routine even more.

Or, this is how I see it.

[Lucas88]

I've never considered the idea of "swinging" and certainly wouldn't allow another man to touch any girlfriend of mine.

However, if I were in a relationship with a bisexual girl, then I'd give her license to have lesbian encounters with other girls. I'd have to allow that so that she could satisfy her own lesbian desires. I wouldn't want to deprive her of complete fulfillment.

[Recover]

If they are properly committed to one another they aren't going to commit adultery, and the fact that they are cool with it or try to be is even more messed up.

For one, I remarried a much more traditional Filipina who will never, and I mean never, consent to even share a kiss with another man or woman, so my opinion is only academic in nature.

This is a world your strong moral backbone isn't able to understand. I have only touched it a little, very tangentially and sporadically, only here in the Philippines, and it won't happen anymore. From what I have seen, couples who entertain the choice of opening up their sexual lives, are not necessarily weaker, or at risk of splitting up. In fact, the act of "controller adultery" that is swinging, is, if anything, an outlet for a woman or a man's inner desires. Once this stuff gets out of the system, what remains is a couple committed to their everyday routine even more.

Or, this is how I see it.

What if it never gets out of system but is like addicting drug and you want more and more to get less and less? Some have brain makeups not ever get adict to drugs not even cigarette but many other get sucked in to bad cycle to dark worlds. Swinger life can destroy your relationship like methmetamines destroy life.