going to a swingers club is legit

[Recover]

I have always been curious about the idea of swinging, as a way to enjoy sex beyond the boundaries of the relationship without damaging the relationship with the spectre of cheating. I had my ex-wife, the hot Colombian, almost convinced to give it a go before something major happened in my life...and ended up divorced before we knew it!

I caught up with it here in the Philippines, although I never obsessively looked for it. I met 3 or 4 couples who had the kink of a white man ravaging their young and pretty wives. In one case the wife was not that pretty and had a bit of trouble LOL. In the others, they were much better than most of the girls I could have met through one of the dating sites. In one case the hubby would "lend" me his wife, who was a Manager at a BPO and, on one occasion, she brought one of her co-workers...which made it even more interesting!

I found out that what both men and women hate about cheating is mostly the secrecy/"behind your back aspect", rather than the idea of the sex act with another partner. Once that breach of loyalty element is out of the way, because swinging is always consensual among all parties involved (even if they are not physically involved, they are supposed to know!), many women and men confess that they are curious with experimenting. Most of those actually love the experiment and get pleasure from it, so they make it a more or less habitual item of their sex lives.

Then once the trigger is off, there's the entire plethora of kinks and experiences out there, from cucking to same room sex, to full swap, to dogging, orgies and sex with different kinds of random people.

From what I understand, there is only one thing the "lifestyle " does not go well with: desperation. It's much harder, to be part of the scene as a single man, unless you have something to offer, e.g. you are physically in shape and you have a much larger than average tool. In that case you would be a "bull", able to have a lot of fun, yet cut out from those experiences where a "real couple" is expressly requested.

I have also seen the swingers' scene naturally enforcing competition and segregation, more or less like the dating game. If I am a 50-yo out of shape man and my wife is a chubby with all the body bits going south, swinging is not a shortcut for sex with a hot 20-yo. I am much more likely to attract couples in the same brackets in terms of age and looks. Of course there might be exceptions if the mature couple looks amazing (diet, gym, relaxed lifestyle) or...you can guess...money is involved.

You open can of worms same as consume porn. Baseline goes up and standard goes up and old way turns to boring non satisfaction ways. Dog that try people food and many sweet treat sometime stop want regular dog food. If one partner physically better than other or much younger like in philippines foreigner with local, girl can have sex dreams of the better partners samples from session and start to not feel it for her mans body thats getting old. And man can become adict to swinger flesh like getting adicted to porn. When couple does this it spice up relationship but morgage future together.

[publicduende]

You open can of worms same as consume porn. Baseline goes up and standard goes up and old way turns to boring non satisfaction ways. Dog that try people food and many sweet treat sometime stop want regular dog food. If one partner physically better than other or much younger like in philippines foreigner with local, girl can have sex dreams of the better partners samples from session and start to not feel it for her mans body thats getting old. And man can become adict to swinger flesh like getting adicted to porn. When couple does this it spice up relationship but morgage future together.

All true. And...?

[MrMan]

I have always been curious about the idea of swinging, as a way to enjoy sex beyond the boundaries of the relationship without damaging the relationship with the spectre of cheating. I had my ex-wife, the hot Colombian, almost convinced to give it a go before something major happened in my life...and ended up divorced before we knew it!

If you both agree to cheat and commit adultery, that doesn't make it not cheating or committing adultery.

You just about had your ex-wife persuaded down to the very low level of commitment where she would commit adultery...then you ended up divorced. Do you think there might be a relationship between those two things?

I mentioned I'd been watching 90-day fiance. There is this black American on the show with a Filippina wife. She's a single mother. She gets engaged to him and tells him she is bi and wants a girlfriend. So they get a girlfriend together, who was actually more into the guy, a girl from Thailand. Then the Filipina gets jealous, acts like her fiance is unfaithful and cheating on her. She forbids him from talking to her. He texts her to see if she is okay during the COVID-19 scare. She feels betrayed if he develops feelings for a woman, but she wants a bi girlfriend to love.

People aren't made for this sort of thing. Women can't handle the jealousy. Their husband being willing to let them just commit adultery like that, and being cool with it, must mess with their heads.

And I don't get it. Why would some guy want another guy's bodily fluid goop up in his girl? It's just gross. And there is also the issue of STDs.

Then standing before the Creator after having committed adultery.

A man should enjoy his own wife. If her body gets too saggy and jiggly, she can exercise or he can turn off the lights.

[publicduende]

You just about had your ex-wife persuaded down to the very low level of commitment where she would commit adultery...then you ended up divorced. Do you think there might be a relationship between those two things?

Absolutely not. There's quite a backstory behind the reason I decided to abandon the UK and move to the Philippines, effectively abandoning my ex-wife. We never cheated on each other while we were together. Swinging, with her participation or full consent anyway, remained just a fantasy until my mind got preoccupied with way heavier and darker thoughts.

Can't blame you for doing an easy "2 + 2", though

I mentioned I'd been watching 90-day fiance. There is this black American on the show with a Filippina wife. She's a single mother. She gets engaged to him and tells him she is bi and wants a girlfriend. So they get a girlfriend together, who was actually more into the guy, a girl from Thailand. Then the Filipina gets jealous, acts like her fiance is unfaithful and cheating on her. She forbids him from talking to her. He texts her to see if she is okay during the COVID-19 scare. She feels betrayed if he develops feelings for a woman, but she wants a bi girlfriend to love.

Yep, I remember that storyline. Honestly, I have always taken 90 Days and all of their spinoffs for pure entertainment value. All couples are under strict NDAs, so we will never know what of their story is true and what's scripted. The very fact these assorted men and women can do the most humiliating things in front of a rolling camera with no consequences in their real lives (besides the occasional spate of hate posts on social media) can only mean one of two things to me: they don't have a real life, or any reason to exercise self-respect, or they're just playing.

Having said that, it's true that many Filipinas are lesbian or bisexual. This, in a society who is far more tolerating towards male gays and TGs (ladyboys) than female homosexuality. Somehow, girls are always supposed to be girls...

I do personally know at least 2 cases of bixexual girls who are allowed to have a girlfriend, with their bf's or husbands' consent. In both cases, though, the lover is pure lesbian and has no interest in their male counterparts. One of them is a Dutch woman who works with Clara, same compaby but not same department. It's large, international institution full of adult professionals who often come here alone, without family. They usually make a lot of money, they have plenty of free time and...yay, Manila is their oyster!

People aren't made for this sort of thing. Women can't handle the jealousy. Their husband being willing to let them just commit adultery like that, and being cool with it, must mess with their heads.

And I don't get it. Why would some guy want another guy's bodily fluid goop up in his girl? It's just gross. And there is also the issue of STDs.

Then standing before the Creator after having committed adultery.

A man should enjoy his own wife. If her body gets too saggy and jiggly, she can exercise or he can turn off the lights.

I respect your stance, which comes from your Catholic upbringing. You probably never met men and women who are into this sort of lifestyle choices. It's true, women are usually a good order of magnitude more possessive than men. Yet, it seems, the idea of joining an intimate experience together, in direct sight and physical contact, perhaps removes much of the jealousy effect. I can't explain.

[69ixine]

I have always been curious about the idea of swinging, as a way to enjoy sex beyond the boundaries of the relationship without damaging the relationship with the spectre of cheating. I had my ex-wife, the hot Colombian, almost convinced to give it a go before something major happened in my life...and ended up divorced before we knew it!

If you both agree to cheat and commit adultery, that doesn't make it not cheating or committing adultery.

You just about had your ex-wife persuaded down to the very low level of commitment where she would commit adultery...then you ended up divorced. Do you think there might be a relationship between those two things?

I mentioned I'd been watching 90-day fiance. There is this black American on the show with a Filippina wife. She's a single mother. She gets engaged to him and tells him she is bi and wants a girlfriend. So they get a girlfriend together, who was actually more into the guy, a girl from Thailand. Then the Filipina gets jealous, acts like her fiance is unfaithful and cheating on her. She forbids him from talking to her. He texts her to see if she is okay during the COVID-19 scare. She feels betrayed if he develops feelings for a woman, but she wants a bi girlfriend to love.

People aren't made for this sort of thing. Women can't handle the jealousy. Their husband being willing to let them just commit adultery like that, and being cool with it, must mess with their heads.

And I don't get it. Why would some guy want another guy's bodily fluid goop up in his girl? It's just gross. And there is also the issue of STDs.

Then standing before the Creator after having committed adultery.

A man should enjoy his own wife. If her body gets too saggy and jiggly, she can exercise or he can turn off the lights.

Do all old women stink like rotting flesh?

I am genuinely curious.because old people have a smell.

and I couldn't imagine wanting to bang my wife if she smells like that.

[Recover]

You open can of worms same as consume porn. Baseline goes up and standard goes up and old way turns to boring non satisfaction ways. Dog that try people food and many sweet treat sometime stop want regular dog food. If one partner physically better than other or much younger like in philippines foreigner with local, girl can have sex dreams of the better partners samples from session and start to not feel it for her mans body thats getting old. And man can become adict to swinger flesh like getting adicted to porn. When couple does this it spice up relationship but morgage future together.

All true. And...?

so probably not true solution to jealousness problem, better avoid if want to preserve relationship to death to us part and anyway the lusting just mind trickery districtings from relationshipal essences because bodies are bags of poop and pea like any animal and magic is at the spirit connections of what is heart of love and mr man seems to understand its perversions and degeneracy nature of swinger life choosings

[MrMan]

I caught up with it here in the Philippines, although I never obsessively looked for it. I met 3 or 4 couples who had the kink of a white man ravaging their young and pretty wives. In one case the wife was not that pretty and had a bit of trouble LOL. In the others, they were much better than most of the girls I could have met through one of the dating sites. In one case the hubby would "lend" me his wife, who was a Manager at a BPO and, on one occasion, she brought one of her co-workers...which made it even more interesting!

I've been "the bull" a few times as well. Once in Europe and twice in the Philippines. One couple even flew me to Boracay, all expenses paid for, it was quite lovely. Stayed at a prettty nice hotel, buffets every night, went island hopping, snorkeling, it was grand. Had a ball lol. I was just their foreign friend and no one on the beach was any the wiser of the 'benefits' involved. It's a very weird dynamic, however. I feel a bit bad for the guys involved. I can't really get into it all the way because post-nut clarity kicks in and I just, feel kinda bad for it. Like I'm a male prostitute or something lol. Didn't help that the couple were doctors so at times the lady's interest got a little... clinical, lol.

Does being a bull require a gay threesome or sloppy seconds and getting another guy's bodily fluids on you?

Clarity after married sex is nice. It's guilt free, and you think that was really good.

[MrMan]

I have always been curious about the idea of swinging, as a way to enjoy sex beyond the boundaries of the relationship without damaging the relationship with the spectre of cheating. I had my ex-wife, the hot Colombian, almost convinced to give it a go before something major happened in my life...and ended up divorced before we knew it!

If you both agree to cheat and commit adultery, that doesn't make it not cheating or committing adultery.

You just about had your ex-wife persuaded down to the very low level of commitment where she would commit adultery...then you ended up divorced. Do you think there might be a relationship between those two things?

I mentioned I'd been watching 90-day fiance. There is this black American on the show with a Filippina wife. She's a single mother. She gets engaged to him and tells him she is bi and wants a girlfriend. So they get a girlfriend together, who was actually more into the guy, a girl from Thailand. Then the Filipina gets jealous, acts like her fiance is unfaithful and cheating on her. She forbids him from talking to her. He texts her to see if she is okay during the COVID-19 scare. She feels betrayed if he develops feelings for a woman, but she wants a bi girlfriend to love.

People aren't made for this sort of thing. Women can't handle the jealousy. Their husband being willing to let them just commit adultery like that, and being cool with it, must mess with their heads.

And I don't get it. Why would some guy want another guy's bodily fluid goop up in his girl? It's just gross. And there is also the issue of STDs.

Then standing before the Creator after having committed adultery.

A man should enjoy his own wife. If her body gets too saggy and jiggly, she can exercise or he can turn off the lights.

Do all old women stink like rotting flesh?

I am genuinely curious.because old people have a smell.

and I couldn't imagine wanting to bang my wife if she smells like that.

I haven't noticed old women smelling bad. There might be an old lady perfume smell. If you go to a nursing home, you might smell urine or worse, but that's from old people who are so feeble or sick that they cannot take care of themselves. I haven't noticed that from old people in general.

Do you think you might smell bad when you get older?

[MrMan]

You just about had your ex-wife persuaded down to the very low level of commitment where she would commit adultery...then you ended up divorced. Do you think there might be a relationship between those two things?

Absolutely not. There's quite a backstory behind the reason I decided to abandon the UK and move to the Philippines, effectively abandoning my ex-wife. We never cheated on each other while we were together. Swinging, with her participation or full consent anyway, remained just a fantasy until my mind got preoccupied with way heavier and darker thoughts.

Can't blame you for doing an easy "2 + 2", though

I mentioned I'd been watching 90-day fiance. There is this black American on the show with a Filippina wife. She's a single mother. She gets engaged to him and tells him she is bi and wants a girlfriend. So they get a girlfriend together, who was actually more into the guy, a girl from Thailand. Then the Filipina gets jealous, acts like her fiance is unfaithful and cheating on her. She forbids him from talking to her. He texts her to see if she is okay during the COVID-19 scare. She feels betrayed if he develops feelings for a woman, but she wants a bi girlfriend to love.

Yep, I remember that storyline. Honestly, I have always taken 90 Days and all of their spinoffs for pure entertainment value. All couples are under strict NDAs, so we will never know what of their story is true and what's scripted. The very fact these assorted men and women can do the most humiliating things in front of a rolling camera with no consequences in their real lives (besides the occasional spate of hate posts on social media) can only mean one of two things to me: they don't have a real life, or any reason to exercise self-respect, or they're just playing.

Having said that, it's true that many Filipinas are lesbian or bisexual. This, in a society who is far more tolerating towards male gays and TGs (ladyboys) than female homosexuality. Somehow, girls are always supposed to be girls...

I do personally know at least 2 cases of bixexual girls who are allowed to have a girlfriend, with their bf's or husbands' consent. In both cases, though, the lover is pure lesbian and has no interest in their male counterparts. One of them is a Dutch woman who works with Clara, same compaby but not same department. It's large, international institution full of adult professionals who often come here alone, without family. They usually make a lot of money, they have plenty of free time and...yay, Manila is their oyster!

This doesn't make sense. Maybe these men have low sex drives or men on the side. Even if a man has low sexual morals, I don't get why a man would want his wife to have a side chick to satiate his wife's sexual desire and not expend it on him.

People aren't made for this sort of thing. Women can't handle the jealousy. Their husband being willing to let them just commit adultery like that, and being cool with it, must mess with their heads.

And I don't get it. Why would some guy want another guy's bodily fluid goop up in his girl? It's just gross. And there is also the issue of STDs.

Then standing before the Creator after having committed adultery.

A man should enjoy his own wife. If her body gets too saggy and jiggly, she can exercise or he can turn off the lights.

I respect your stance, which comes from your Catholic upbringing. You probably never met men and women who are into this sort of lifestyle choices. It's true, women are usually a good order of magnitude more possessive than men. Yet, it seems, the idea of joining an intimate experience together, in direct sight and physical contact, perhaps removes much of the jealousy effect. I can't explain.

I am a Christian. I am not Roman Catholic and was not raised Roman Catholic.

From what I hear, open marriages tend not to last.

Why would a man marry and put half of his assets at risk if he and his wife were just going to sleep around?

[69ixine]

I have always been curious about the idea of swinging, as a way to enjoy sex beyond the boundaries of the relationship without damaging the relationship with the spectre of cheating. I had my ex-wife, the hot Colombian, almost convinced to give it a go before something major happened in my life...and ended up divorced before we knew it!

If you both agree to cheat and commit adultery, that doesn't make it not cheating or committing adultery.

You just about had your ex-wife persuaded down to the very low level of commitment where she would commit adultery...then you ended up divorced. Do you think there might be a relationship between those two things?

I mentioned I'd been watching 90-day fiance. There is this black American on the show with a Filippina wife. She's a single mother. She gets engaged to him and tells him she is bi and wants a girlfriend. So they get a girlfriend together, who was actually more into the guy, a girl from Thailand. Then the Filipina gets jealous, acts like her fiance is unfaithful and cheating on her. She forbids him from talking to her. He texts her to see if she is okay during the COVID-19 scare. She feels betrayed if he develops feelings for a woman, but she wants a bi girlfriend to love.

People aren't made for this sort of thing. Women can't handle the jealousy. Their husband being willing to let them just commit adultery like that, and being cool with it, must mess with their heads.

And I don't get it. Why would some guy want another guy's bodily fluid goop up in his girl? It's just gross. And there is also the issue of STDs.

Then standing before the Creator after having committed adultery.

A man should enjoy his own wife. If her body gets too saggy and jiggly, she can exercise or he can turn off the lights.

Do all old women stink like rotting flesh?

I am genuinely curious.because old people have a smell.

and I couldn't imagine wanting to bang my wife if she smells like that.

I haven't noticed old women smelling bad. There might be an old lady perfume smell. If you go to a nursing home, you might smell urine or worse, but that's from old people who are so feeble or sick that they cannot take care of themselves. I haven't noticed that from old people in general.

Do you think you might smell bad when you get older?

I do think some old people do smell like rotting flesh,not all,but some,I've seen it mostly in older white women,and it is a repulsive odour.it smells like rotting flesh.it's the body decaying,not a perfume.

[MrMan]

I have always been curious about the idea of swinging, as a way to enjoy sex beyond the boundaries of the relationship without damaging the relationship with the spectre of cheating. I had my ex-wife, the hot Colombian, almost convinced to give it a go before something major happened in my life...and ended up divorced before we knew it!

If you both agree to cheat and commit adultery, that doesn't make it not cheating or committing adultery.

You just about had your ex-wife persuaded down to the very low level of commitment where she would commit adultery...then you ended up divorced. Do you think there might be a relationship between those two things?

I mentioned I'd been watching 90-day fiance. There is this black American on the show with a Filippina wife. She's a single mother. She gets engaged to him and tells him she is bi and wants a girlfriend. So they get a girlfriend together, who was actually more into the guy, a girl from Thailand. Then the Filipina gets jealous, acts like her fiance is unfaithful and cheating on her. She forbids him from talking to her. He texts her to see if she is okay during the COVID-19 scare. She feels betrayed if he develops feelings for a woman, but she wants a bi girlfriend to love.

People aren't made for this sort of thing. Women can't handle the jealousy. Their husband being willing to let them just commit adultery like that, and being cool with it, must mess with their heads.

And I don't get it. Why would some guy want another guy's bodily fluid goop up in his girl? It's just gross. And there is also the issue of STDs.

Then standing before the Creator after having committed adultery.

A man should enjoy his own wife. If her body gets too saggy and jiggly, she can exercise or he can turn off the lights.

Do all old women stink like rotting flesh?

I am genuinely curious.because old people have a smell.

and I couldn't imagine wanting to bang my wife if she smells like that.

I haven't noticed old women smelling bad. There might be an old lady perfume smell. If you go to a nursing home, you might smell urine or worse, but that's from old people who are so feeble or sick that they cannot take care of themselves. I haven't noticed that from old people in general.

Do you think you might smell bad when you get older?

I do think some old people do smell like rotting flesh,not all,but some,I've seen it mostly in older white women,and it is a repulsive odour.it smells like rotting flesh.it's the body decaying,not a perfume.

Are these oldwomen also morbidly obese and unable to wash the fat rotting in between their folds of flesh.

[publicduende]

This doesn't make sense. Maybe these men have low sex drives or men on the side. Even if a man has low sexual morals, I don't get why a man would want his wife to have a side chick to satiate his wife's sexual desire and not expend it on him.

It can be for a number of reasons. Maybe the men is happy to see his wife's desire satisfied, plus he gets some kicks by fantasizing about her woman having sex with another woman. Maybe the gf is not entire homosexual and would let them indulge on a threesome from time to time.

Cases and nuances can be so many, it's difficult to explain. I am all for "live and let live", so long all of this is fully consensual and non-coercive/non-abusive.

I am a Christian. I am not Roman Catholic and was not raised Roman Catholic.

From what I hear, open marriages tend not to last.

Why would a man marry and put half of his assets at risk if he and his wife were just going to sleep around?

Sorry, I did not know what church you belong to so I assumed Roman Catholic. I don't know how your choice of (Protestant?) church impacts your world view and how it might related to that of a Roman Catholic.

From what I have seen, very few swingers are in open relationships. Open relationships, I agree, tend not to last, for the simple reason that the level of commitment from both parties is, by design, quite low.

Most people into this lifestyle are actually couples with several years of married relationship under their belt, kids and mortgages and the lot, who choose to bring something new and fresh (and maybe a bit risque, too!) into their sexual life. Again, there can be a million of reasons. So long none of these qualify as coercion/abuse or is meant to mentally or physically harm, I don't see why not.

[publicduende]

They can work out, but it's rare. Those that do work out, don't advertise they're open. They're super discreet about it. Like KGB levels discreet.

Most swingers are not in open relationships, though. They open their bedrooms and intimacy to other men, women and couples, or make their sex life more promiscuous and public by attending specific events at specific locations, but that doesn't necessarily means they stop committing to one another.

[MrMan]

They can work out, but it's rare. Those that do work out, don't advertise they're open. They're super discreet about it. Like KGB levels discreet.

Most swingers are not in open relationships, though. They open their bedrooms and intimacy to other men, women and couples, or make their sex life more promiscuous and public by attending specific events at specific locations, but that doesn't necessarily means they stop committing to one another.

If they are properly committed to one another they aren't going to commit adultery, and the fact that they are cool with it or try to be is even more messed up.

[publicduende]

If they are properly committed to one another they aren't going to commit adultery, and the fact that they are cool with it or try to be is even more messed up.

For one, I remarried a much more traditional Filipina who will never, and I mean never, consent to even share a kiss with another man or woman, so my opinion is only academic in nature.

This is a world your strong moral backbone isn't able to understand. I have only touched it a little, very tangentially and sporadically, only here in the Philippines, and it won't happen anymore. From what I have seen, couples who entertain the choice of opening up their sexual lives, are not necessarily weaker, or at risk of splitting up. In fact, the act of "controller adultery" that is swinging, is, if anything, an outlet for a woman or a man's inner desires. Once this stuff gets out of the system, what remains is a couple committed to their everyday routine even more.

Or, this is how I see it.