I need some recommendations from you guys with how to deal with my roommate and old friend: he's 31 years old, works part-time as a janitor and has been hung up with an awful case of oneitis for a woman for 3+ years now. When he's not working at his job, he sits in his bedroom in his underwear and watches movies and reads fantasy novels 40-50 hours a week (this is a calculation, I'm not even exaggerating here). He doesn't really have any close friends around his age other than me. He's still dreaming of becoming a hollywood movie actor or film producer or something someday, so he tells me that he's "studying" movies when he watches them, yet I've never seen any doors open for him for an actual paid career in entertainment. Yet he keeps dreaming an immature/impossible dream, not even pursuing it, and living like a complete slob in the meantime. Plus, he's hung up on this girl for over 3 years when she's rejected him 5-6 times and has made it clear that she only wants to be friends. I've told him to move on and date other girls, but he's convinced that this particular woman is his future wife and, given his situation, he really has no dating options anyways.
For the record, I'm moving out to my own place pretty soon, since it's time for me to go and he's become very depressing to live with. I feel sorry for the guy, what can I say or do to encourage him to get over this girl, grow up, get a real job, financial responsibility, a social life, et cetera??? I mean, I am at a jaw-dropping loss here as to what is going to turn this guy around??? I had hoped that turning 30 would at least force him to give up the film actor dream, but he's still very immature and going nowhere. Help?!
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Help with my very immature friend/roommate
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