I get it now: Why Asian Men Want To Be Approached (Chased)

[mguy]

Asian culture is highly patriarchal. The men hold the sexual value here. Unlike in USA where the females hold the power. In Asia, men have all the power. An Asian man still holds these patriarchial values subconsciously and brings it to America. Asian American girls are aware of this Asian patriarchy, betrays it, and seek to escape it. In Asia, men do not do approaches. Why would they: when the power is tilted to them. Asian girls approach them, not the other way around but in the USA this will not hold. Why? Bc in the USA the sexual power is in the females.

[zboy1]

And Asia must do everything possible to prevent the feminists from getting a hold of their country, the way they have done to the U.S.A/Canada/Australia and all other Western countries!

Look at Japan! The feminists have taken over that country, and look at the result! An absolute demographic disaster!

[Dragon]

Asian culture is highly patriarchal. The men hold the sexual value here. Unlike in USA where the females hold the power. In Asia, men have all the power. An Asian man still holds these patriarchial values subconsciously and brings it to America. Asian American girls are aware of this Asian patriarchy, betrays it, and seek to escape it. In Asia, men do not do approaches. Why would they: when the power is tilted to them. Asian girls approach them, not the other way around but in the USA this will not hold. Why? Bc in the USA the sexual power is in the females.

Wow, that's a pretty good insight. It explains a lot of things. I guess that's what happens when there's no social safety net (and feminism) for women, so they have to be on their best behavior/attractiveness and use that to convince a man to invest in them.

[buddy77]

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[abcdavid01]

Really? The girls approach in Asia?

[Banano]

Really? The girls approach in Asia?

No, normal women don't approach and men still pay for everything:(

Its even worse than in the West when it comes to paying and supporting woman

[Repatriate]

Really? The girls approach in Asia?

No, normal women don't approach and men still pay for everything:(

Its even worse than in the West when it comes to paying and supporting woman

What made you come to this conclusion? I know a lot of men dating asian women in asia and none of them have been totally raked over the coals legally and financially like an American woman can do. The women I dated never demanded or tried to swindle me either.

There are a lot of stupid guys who do things like buy houses or create businesses under a shady bargirl's name in places like Thailand. However, that scenario is mostly a self created crisis rather than a social norm.

[bob123]

I think asian men do grow up in patriarchal households where the asian wife is subserviant to her husband. So asian boys grow up to be lazy when it comes to romance and poor communication skills, and have unrealistic expectations when it comes to wooing white women. the patriarchal culture and mindset will not work if white women don't find asian men sexually or socially desirable. If you want a subserviant wife, then you have to go to asia to find an asian wife. Because white american girls are far more demanding and have higher expectations in a future husband.

[sea_dragon]

Asian women are not that subservient at all. If not, they are cats that turn into tigers.

[Yohan]

Look at Japan! The feminists have taken over that country, and look at the result! An absolute demographic disaster!

Where do you see feminists in Japan?

The Japanese law is not much supportive to feminism at all.

Japan has a very weak domestic violence law, there is no child support or alimony, there are strong parents rights (including father's rights), co-habitation is not accepted as a form of marriage and if breaking up, regardless of co-habitation or divorce of a marriage, it's no business for any lawyer. Sign a form together and disappear. Finished.

Most Asian countries offer a better legal situation for the man than USA.

Japan is by far better regarding marriage and family for the man than USA/Canada, Europe, Australia etc.etc.

[Yohan]

If you want a subserviant wife, then you have to go to asia to find an asian wife. Because white american girls are far more demanding and have higher expectations in a future husband.

Asian women are not subserviant, and about white American girls far more demanding, higher expectations etc., it's nothing wrong with that, but the question is what are they willing to offer in return to their husband?

American women consider marriage as a one-way road - it's all from him to me, me and me. With nothing in return.

And they are all the same, any American women regardless her race, it is not only about white American women.

[zboy1]

Look at Japan! The feminists have taken over that country, and look at the result! An absolute demographic disaster!

Where do you see feminists in Japan?

The Japanese law is not much supportive to feminism at all.

Japan has a very weak domestic violence law, there is no child support or alimony, there are strong parents rights (including father's rights), co-habitation is not accepted as a form of marriage and if breaking up, regardless of co-habitation or divorce of a marriage, it's no business for any lawyer. Sign a form together and disappear. Finished.

Most Asian countries offer a better legal situation for the man than USA.

Japan is by far better regarding marriage and family for the man than USA/Canada, Europe, Australia etc.etc.

Well...I don't mean the laws or society are feminist; I meant some Japanese women are becoming increasingly independent, entitled and materialistic; also, many are deciding not to get married or have too high-of-a-standards. Is this not true, Yohan?

You're the expert on Japan here, so maybe I'm wrong?

[Yohan]

The situation is about the following:

In the Japanese society there is clearly a movement of young women from rural areas to the larger cities - as city life is more comfortable and there are jobs which can be done by women easily.

Japanese farmers and fishermen in remote areas have a big problem to take over the company from their parents, they have to do this alone, as there is no woman in their region for marriage.

The Japanese government knows about this situation, but what to do? Anyway, there is no problem for a Japanese man to travel abroad and to bring a foreign wife into Japan, there is a minimum of formalities, a spouse visa with full health insurance and working permit is granted within a few weeks to the foreign spouse.

Now there are many more Japanese men married with a foreign wife than Japanese women married with a foreign husband, more than 2:1 already.

There are rural villages known in Japan with 10 old Japanese women and 150 young foreign women coming in as far as from Sri Lanka.

Young Japanese women AND men living in the cities are not anymore interested into marriage and children, but this does not mean you cannot talk to them, there is social life, going out, some try co-habitation etc.

In every large city now in Japan you will notice a large surplus of women who are usually paying for their own needs.

Young MEN in the cities are often refusing marriage with the argument that they have no permanent job and not enough income to create a family. This argument makes sense in the cities, as housing is very expensive, also higher education for children is very expensive, and how can you pay for that if you suddenly have no job?

I think it sounds quite responsible.
You should know about all these student loans, house forfeit etc. problems in USA. Japanese do not like that and try to avoid such a situation.

We do not have a gender imbalance in Japan, men/women any age is about 50/50 and if a woman or a man does not want to marry and to create a family, can you blame them?

We are now in Metropolitan Tokyo about 36 million people, and tiny Japan, compare it with 25 x bigger USA has now 127 million people. It is crowded and housing regardless if rent or sale is horrible expensive. I think we all wish a reduction of the population.

I consider South Korea even worse in this aspect, this tiny half of a peninsula with 48 million people and crazy North Korea not far away. It is no surprise that South Koreans are often aggressive and getting violent after long working hours, less income than Japan, but with much money spent for their own defence and for the US-military.

For sure you can approach Japanese women much easier than Korean women, I also do not think, the average Japanese woman you can see in the cities during work, shopping in supermarkets, meeting friends in small restaurants etc. is so much overdemanding.

Many foreign men do not have much sense for meeting Japanese women as it is done in Japan among the Japanese, where much is based on being in a group, gossip and introduction, and Japanese are not known to be good in foreign languages. Communication remains a problem for many foreigners when they try to socialize with Japanese people.

What they finally meet are women in a foreigner's bar in Roppongi, Cosplayers in Shibuya and similar girls who are only into sex fun and money - not really a good start for a long-term relationship in Japan.

[Yohan]

Well...I don't mean the laws or society are feminist; I meant some Japanese women are becoming increasingly independent, entitled and materialistic; also, many are deciding not to get married or have too high-of-a-standards. Is this not true, Yohan?

You're the expert on Japan here, so maybe I'm wrong?

I think many Western foreigners have a totally wrong impression of Japan, reading some English biased articles only, which often contain bare nonsense about men working like idiots and women only asking for money and bizarre sex-stories.
I heard nonsense that in Tokyo are only small houses because of earthquakes and all people are eating only whale meat.

There is also the idea going on that all Japan is radioactive.

viewtopic.php?t=23969&highlight=

There is a Japanese thread in this forum, I replied only one time however. Not so many Western foreigners are interested in Japan.

[DanielleNguyen]

I actually approached my now husband first but it makes sense. However, at the time I was looking for a friend and I was bored. Did I ever think I would marry him? Nope. Life works in funny ways.