Joining the Navy a good way to meet foreign women?

[Winston]

Did those of you who joined the navy or military at least experience good human connection and camaraderie during your service? Were the guys there buddies with you or your bros? In the movies, they always show guys in the military act like buddies and brothers who will risk their lives for you. Is that really true?

Also, what about the women in the military? Can you socialize with them and date them? If they are on your team or platoon or squadron, then wouldn't you get close to them enough to form a relationship or connection? If so can you date them?

There is a funny saying among male buddies, "bros before hos" and the female version is "sisters before misters". lol

[yick]

Did those of you who joined the navy or military at least experience good human connection and camaraderie during your service?

Yes, still in touch with some of them nearly 30 years later.

Were the guys there buddies with you or your bros?

They're your mates! I don't know about 'bros' but they are people you can rely on.

In the movies, they always show guys in the military act like buddies and brothers who will risk their lives for you. Is that really true?

Yep.

Also, what about the women in the military? Can you socialize with them and date them? If they are on your team or platoon or squadron, then wouldn't you get close to them enough to form a relationship or connection? If so can you date them?

Bit before my time but it seems you can.

The army is a good place to meet good friends but there are plenty of arseholes and a lot of laughs.

[Winston]

From an expat friend who is a long time navy veteran and VFW member:

"Sure you could experience a lot in military including the women but there were rules against people of higher rate socializing with subordinates so I’m sure it happened but not in the open
I don’t think the bros before hoes was a military thing
Most cases for along time you didn’t want women fighting with you because the ingrained desire to protect women and not do the job needed but that’s all changed now women have lost that status with there desire to be equal
And at one time women were a motivating factor “ fighting for the girl back home “ but most of that has been lost too"

[Man With a Plan]

I have to call bullshit on @Mr S and @Jackal here. Sure, the military (the US anyway) has a lot of bullshit, but I find it odd that veterans who claim to have served say things like, "you won't accomplish much" and "it's horrible"--even going as far as claiming the Russian military is better.

1) Re: Russia. This is another issue with the vast majority of users here. The bit about "American propaganda" is silly. Every major power uses propaganda. This is just a case of sour grapes, where you not getting what you feel entitled to (from the west) being shat on. The key word here is entitled. None of you are entitled to anything but freedom, justice and fair treatment under the law (and even those aren't free and must be fought for). You're certainly not entitled to women, whether western or otherwise. This is why I recommend therapy for y'all. No woman worth a damn, nor her father (in places where you still need his approval to do anything with her) will sign off on 99% of the men here, and that's for good reason. Get over yourselves.

2) Re: US Navy. The truth is always somewhere between Side A and Side B. Yes, the military is full of dregs and low IQ inbred degenerates who can't function without Uncle Sam's tit in their mouths. No argument there. But a lot of military members (especially these days) bring their low IQ selves to boot camp, then tech school (for their jobs), do a bunch of stupid shit, and when they get punished, blame the military for not wiping their asses. If you're an E-1 making peanuts, does it make mathematical sense to buy a brand new 2021 Dodge Charger with 2.6% APR? No, it doesn't. You can do that, but when you start seeing your meager restitution become even more meager, you'll have no one to blame but yourselves. Is it a good idea to be under 21, join, and go drink yourself stupid until you either get blackout retard drunk or get in the driver's seat and crash/catch a DUI charge? Obviously not. But when a lot of these young bucks get up in uniform and do that stupid shit and are punished as a result, they want to cry foul and claim the military is the problem. No, you're the problem.

3) Conclusion: Ultimately, OP, it's your decision and I wouldn't push you to join because there are some valid points to being anti-MIL. Trying to make a global empire built on the stolen resources of various brown peoples and f***ing their cultures up in the process. So if THAT is an argument, I hear you 100% and have no argument on that one. And if you have any doubts, I'd tell you it's best to think of any route to success--whatever that may look like for you. But you have to consider the fact that you're an adult male, and should be aware of the fact that everything is life has trades. The military trades time. Other avenues may trade certain freedoms, or pay, or lifestyle, or any combination of the aforementioned. If you want to join and give it a shot, go for it. If you want to go down another path, that's fine too. Just make sure that whatever you decide to do, you move with integrity and remember that none of us are owed success. We have to TAKE it for ourselves. Hope this helps.

[Shemp]

No woman worth a damn, nor her father (in places where you still need his approval to do anything with her) will sign off on 99% of the men here, and that's for good reason.

I suspect Mr S had someone like Man With a Plan as his Navy supervisor.

But when a lot of these young bucks get up in uniform and do that stupid shit and are punished as a result, they want to cry foul and claim the military is the problem. No, you're the problem.

Probably the above also applied to Mr S.

[IraqVet2003]

From an expat friend who is a long time navy veteran and VFW member:

"Sure you could experience a lot in military including the women but there were rules against people of higher rate socializing with subordinates so I’m sure it happened but not in the open
I don’t think the bros before hoes was a military thing
Most cases for along time you didn’t want women fighting with you because the ingrained desire to protect women and not do the job needed but that’s all changed now women have lost that status with there desire to be equal
And at one time women were a motivating factor “ fighting for the girl back home “ but most of that has been lost too"

Hey Winston, I think you meant of a higher RANK. And by the way it's called FRATERIZATION in the military. An example of this would be an female officer can't be dating a male private or sergeant (NCO-Non Commissioned Officer).

[MrMan]

My dad suggested I go into the Navy to pay for my college. I told him I didn't want to be in a situation where I had to kill someone. A year later, the Gulf War broke out and he did not try to direct me or my younger brother into the military. He'd been in the army, but he'd seen some Navy literature, I guess.

My personal freedom is also valuable to me. The military does take care of people financially. They may give you a dishonorable discharge these days if you go in and refuse a shot. So that's another concern with Biden as president. The disease probably has 4 to 6 months left, maybe a year, and the governments keeps intruding into people's lives and health decisions.

The Peace Core is another option. I don't know about the Peace Core and shots. It's also a pathway into aid-related federal jobs if you are interested. I had a cousin who did Peace Core, but did not go into a federal job. They sent him to Africa. If you like African women, that might be a way to go.

If you want to be an English teacher overseas, a lot of countries require a degree. Long-term, it isn't as great of a career as some others. If I had it to do over again, I might get something other than a humanities or social science degree-- something that kind of translates into a career, and then teach overseas. For example, you could study one of the engineering or business fields or some kind of medical-related or specialized education degree--- then take a couple of years and teach overseas.

Also, international schools will hire qualified teachers who have credentials in their home states. Some of the richer schools pay well and put you up in a nice house. That's the way it was in Jakarta. I'm not sure if you get car and drive. A buddy of mine had a masters, worked at a school oil companies sent employees kids to, and made over 90K in the year 2000. He headed up some kind of program there. They put him up in this big house with marble and granite walls and floors. I was working for a Christian school that put my family up in a smaller house with stone floors like that in a neighborhood with a pool and a little fitness center with a lot of worn down equipment and some working weight machines. I didn't have an education degree, though, so I was limited in what jobs I could get.

You can have any degree and get the English teacher type job. TEFL training may give you an idea of what actually to do. I had half a training course before I had to fly out once, and just had to learn on the fly. Side-by-Side books are really good. Lean on the teachers notes with whatever book you get until you get the hang of it.

Traditional Asian women typically want to marry, and they want a man with a stable job before they marry. In Indonesia, 23 is marrying age for girls. When I was 25 and 26 there, people would ask me, "Why aren't you married?" I guess they figured I was good enough looking and had a decent job. It was an odd question for me, so I thought of some different responses, "Because I'm too ugly", "I am afraid of commitment" were funny but not true. So I figured the best, truest answer is, "I haven't found the right person."


When I was 22, I think, I went off to South Korea and taught in an English institute there. The housing schools offered there was a shared apartment, usually three in a three bedroom with one bath. A friend of mine in Seoul had his own 'officetel'-- an office building where rooms could be used as apartments or hotel rooms or whatever. The bathroom had a drain in the floor and a sink. You had to heat water and dip for a shower. Heat went off at night and you had to use a heater. The location was a small block off a main street in Kangnam. Employers provide insurance. The work for me was Monday through Friday, split shift-- like 7:20 or 8:30 in the morning until 9:30 or 10. And then again 4:30 or so to 9 or 10 PM, depending on the schedule. There was no American military TV in that town. TV channels went off in the middle of the day. At night they were dubbed with no subtitles. Movies and little rooms to rent VCR tapes and watch them had movies with subtitles. There were lots of Korean restaurants in the town, a Hardees, Pizza Hut, a knock off of TGI-Fridays, a few western places to eat at, little entertainment things like a BB shooting game on one of the little side streets, video game arcades, pubs called 'HOF' that served quazi-western food with kind of gelatinous gravy on cuts of meat and cabbage with mayo and ketchup as a salad, a mountain to hike at on the weekend, and people everywhere.

Koreans may set you up. Three of my students took me out. The two young men left, and said, "Now, you date her." She was probably a 9+ for facial beauty with a short petite frame. But she was my student and a different religion, and I didn't pursue it. An ex-military buddy of mine who I used to play 'Civilization' or 'CivNet' with had just gotten married to a pretty young Korean woman. They showed me a picture of her co-worker who I wasn't attracted to. They took me with her family to an amusement park. The girl showed up with a knock-out. I told my buddy I could go around the park with those two girls instead of with his 7-year-old nephew and grandparents. He said I missed my chance. I said he didn't show me the pretty girls picture. I date a couple of girls there, an Indonesian I met in the park, and a Korean girl from church who spoke English.

I did not date a lot a year or so later when I went to Jakarta, but I had a few female 'friends' who I got close with. I think all three liked me, but one liked me but wasn't interested. She was gorgeous but about 5 years older than me, kind of bossy, and wouldn't let me get a word in edgewise half the time. It is good we didn't pursue it. I wasn't interested in the other two for different reasons. I was particular, though, and was looking for a wife, not for someone who I knew I wouldn't be satisfied with for the long term. I was particular about character, shared beliefs, values, and also looks. I finally met the woman I married, though, in Indonesia while I was there working as an English teacher.

Maybe it was because my looks particularly suit the tastes of Indonesian women or because expats are 'high status' to a lot of Indonesians over there (or were especially back then), or partly because I was at that prime marrying age where I was just a bit older than the girls who were at the time to find a man and settle down, but it sure seemed like a lot of women liked me when I was there. Co-workers, girls from church, shopping attendants at the mall. They weren't all overt about it, but paid a bit more attention, some flirted a little, kind of like middle school girls who like a boy, and a few of my middle school students seemed to have a crush on me. I even had a stalker who I kept trying to avoid who found out where I lived, showed up where I lived and said, "I love you" early on Saturday when I was trying to sleep in. The apple-shaped salesgirl at one of the malls would come up to me and flirt with me whenever I went to her department store. Most girls that showed interest weren't the type I was particularly interested in since I was rather picky. I experienced some female interest as a young man in the US, but nothing like in Indonesia.

I didn't have a degree that would get me another job and when I wanted to live in the US, I got a job for a charitable organization that went under and went back to teaching in Indonesia. I got into corporate training for a while. Then I went to grad school in the US and went the academic route.

[Winston]

MrMan,
Most military people never experience combat right? But you never know. I'm glad you didn't join the miltary. Those who have had to kill people during their service are usually haunted by it for the rest of their life. And they suffer post traumatic stress syndrome too. It's not worth it. An expat friend of mine who was in combat, when we were in Angeles City, he would not even come out to see the fireworks show, because it triggered his PTSD probably. He wouldn't admit it, but I sensed that was the reason.

Even the movies show this. The soldiers usually ask each other "Have you ever killed someone? How did it feel?" If you think about it, it is kind of stupid to kill someone you don't know and have nothing against just because the government says so. That doesn't make sense and doesn't feel right either. It haunts you if you have a conscience. Watch the movie "American Sniper" and see how that guy was haunted by it, it's a true story.

Why didn't you join the ROTC (Reserved Officers Training Corps)? Then you could become an officer after graduation. Or the navy or air force. Usually being on a naval vessel doesn't involve combat. And air force operators aren't usually involved in combat. Or you could be an army medical nurse.

Many military people probably do it because it's in their blood, not for ideology or patriotism.

[Man With a Plan]

@Shemp - Hop off my balls, kid. Stop trying to get a lick.

@MrMan - Not to be rude, but 90% of that had nothing to do with the topic. It was a blogpost, rather than stuff about the military.

[MrMan]

@Shemp - Hop off my balls, kid. Stop trying to get a lick.

@MrMan - Not to be rude, but 90% of that had nothing to do with the topic. It was a blogpost, rather than stuff about the military.

I was selling the idea of being an English teacher over the navy. Other people told the downside of the navy.

[Shemp]

@Shemp - Hop off my balls, kid. Stop trying to get a lick.

Please refrain from these homosexual innuendos and from sending me PMs with more homosexual innuendos. Don't they have women in the modern navy you can think about? Or maybe access to porn?

Getting back on topic, note that Man With a Plan is the kind of shipmate and perhaps also commanding officer you might be dealing with in the Navy, 24*7 for months on end on a very crowded ship.

[Man With a Plan]

@Shemp - Hop off my balls, kid. Stop trying to get a lick.

@MrMan - Not to be rude, but 90% of that had nothing to do with the topic. It was a blogpost, rather than stuff about the military.

I was selling the idea of being an English teacher over the navy. Other people told the downside of the navy.

That's fine. But don't sell the idea like it's the most epic route ever. Most of the best offers require degrees AND certificates. Race is also a factor. If you're white, you're going to get the best offers off rip. Then, country you'll be teaching in. There are so many variables that you can't say it's 100% objectively better than going the MIL route. For some, it is, and that's perfectly okay. For others, they may go MIL, do their time and then ghost. Or, they may do something else entirely. The focus is for them to make the decision that best meets their needs. If, for OP, that's the military, then share knowledge with him and wish him the best of luck.

@Shemp - Hop off my balls, kid. Stop trying to get a lick.

Please refrain from these homosexual innuendos and from sending me PMs with more homosexual innuendos. Don't they have women in the modern navy you can think about? Or maybe access to porn?

Getting back on topic, note that Man With a Plan is the kind of shipmate and perhaps also commanding officer you might be dealing with in the Navy, 24*7 for months on end on a very crowded ship.

Hop off my dick, kid, and get a life. Maybe daddy didn't show you enough love and attention, but therapy will help with that. Not taking up an obsession with a rando on a backwater forum. This clown hasn't even served or worn a uniform (except on Halloween, but that doesn't count).

[Shemp]

Hop off my dick

I knew the Navy attracted closet homosexuals, but I never realized it was this bad. At least sodomy legal now. Are you allowed to f**k your fellow sailors? If not, or if you can't find another sailor to reciprocate your homosexual lusts, maybe get yourself a fleshlight® (anal version), plus a kingsize dildo for your own ass.

[Man With a Plan]

Hop off my dick

I knew the Navy attracted closet homosexuals, but I never realized it was this bad. At least sodomy legal now. Are you allowed to f**k your fellow sailors? If not, or if you can't find another sailor to reciprocate your homosexual lusts, maybe get yourself a fleshlight® (anal version), plus a kingsize dildo for your own ass.

Like I said, hop off my dick and get a life, bro. I'll go ahead and put you on ignore so enjoy screaming into the void. f***ing faggot.

[MrMan]

That's fine. But don't sell the idea like it's the most epic route ever. Most of the best offers require degrees AND certificates. Race is also a factor. If you're white, you're going to get the best offers off rip. Then, country you'll be teaching in. There are so many variables that you can't say it's 100% objectively better than going the MIL route. For some, it is, and that's perfectly okay. For others, they may go MIL, do their time and then ghost. Or, they may do something else entirely. The focus is for them to make the decision that best meets their needs. If, for OP, that's the military, then share knowledge with him and wish him the best of luck.

I wrote about the limited career options I had as an ESL teacher. It was good when I was young and single, but for the most part, there is a cap on what you can earn (unless you go into management or owning a school, which requires other skills).

In my case, I realized if I wanted my kids to go to an English-speaking school, my then-current income would not cover the options I was aware of for that type of education if we remained in Indonesia. The non-career-specific degree I had in the humanities and social sciences area did not prepare me for a specific job. I went to grad school.

If I had had an education degree, engineering degree, business, etc. I might have had more job options.