Send money or visit instead? Need opinions please!

[atrueloveme]

I have a dilemma. I have a long distance relationship with this wonderful woman overseas. It's been going for two and a half years but I haven't met her yet. We've been contemplating meeting in person for months and I'm wondering if I should send money so she can visit or I go to her instead?
For some background, the woman I'm dating is from Odessa, Ukraine and we met through online chatting. It was from this site called A Foreign Affair It was recommended to me by friends who actually met their wives through the site.
I'm not "buying" a person, I'm only using the services. I talk to my gf on the phone with the help of a translator. That was a year ago, I'm getting better with my Ukrainian and she with her English We can communicate fairly well without help.
I want to know if it's safe to travel in Ukraine during December? I wanna spend the holidays with her. It's always been Skype and telephone calls in the past two years, I was thinking we should spend time together in person.
It’s not that I don’t trust her, it’s just I’m not sure if I want her to travel alone by herself coming here in Colorado. She did say that she will be fine and I know she can do it, but I dunno, I kind of feel iffy about it.
Tell me guys, should I visit her in Ukraine or should I just send her money to have her travel here US? Any advice will greatly help. Thanks in advance!!!

[dragonsmack68]

Well, I don't know how safe it is traveling to the Ukraine but I will say this, no way in hell would I ever send money to a girl I have never met. Besides, does she even have a tourist visa? If she does, have you actually seen the visa? The Ukraine is a hot spot for female scammers so I wouldn't trust her.

Anyway, I will repeat this statement, do not send her any money.

[Yohan]

To talk to each other using translators from an agency which is taking money for their services and to talk to each other by phone/internet and never meet personally is something like a fantasy world, an online relationship, and such friends do not make much sense before meeting them personally face to face and see where they are living, how they are living and staying with them for a while.

Do not send any money.

On the other side, I see no objection why not to visit Odessa. However should you decide to travel to that area, I would include some other countries/cities too in Europe. Enjoy your vacation. Travel around!

If you are really interested in any relationship with Eastern Europe, YOU should (or better say YOU must!) study about the language which people are using in that region. If you cannot decide, maybe Russian - not an easy language - might be useful.

I am a bit surprised that you need translators anyway, as many people even those with little basic educational background in Eastern Europe can speak some English, and not so few of them - instead of English - have some knowledge of German, and some in the area of Romania and nearby can speak some French...

You need translators? Really? This fact alone makes me highly mistrusting...

How many languages can you speak and how many languages can she speak? Good question.
Why did you and she not study any language of your both choice to communicate to each other without translators?

And again, as said already, do not send any money.

[JesseL26]

Never ever ever send money to anyone online I don't care who it is unless you have met each other in person and have something established. I made this mistake once and I knew the girl for well over a year. She later on forgot the gentleman I was and started to ignore me probably does this with many men. BTW no one serious will ever ask you for money online if they do they aren't looking for love.

[TruthSeeker]

Yes, you should go meet her in Odessa. Do not send funds. Why the inclination to send funds? What is that going to do?

You say you've spent two years talking to her through AFA? I assume then you've spent thousands. AFA doesn't mind this. They just want to keep making money off you.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSmrEm6yQbI[/youtube]

Going to Ukraine now is like going to any part of Europe. Just get on a plane with your passport. Odessa is safe any time of the year with modern hotels, restaurants, etc.

[Zambales]

Sending money to a "future" partner is just the same as paying agencies and romance tour operators in my opinion. The common denominator here is that one or both parties tend to fleece the unfortunate lovelost male individual. In this particular case, how do we know that the woman in question is just acting as a decoy to extract as much money from the OP as possible?

Hopefully, this isn't the case and if it's not, a woman who's prepared to wait 2.5 years+ to meet a man should be seen in a positive light.

[TruthSeeker]

Actually "she" (the real girl in the photo) probably isn't aware of the OP. A paid translator is writing on her behalf. If the guy happens to show up in her town then she is filled in on the correspondence much like you see in the above video. If the girl is married or has moved away excuses are made and proposals of other girls are made. This is how this business works.

[droid]

The OP is spamming for afa, tsk. Why do you guys entertain this bullcrap?

[TruthSeeker]

Actually I think the OP is asking a sincere question. Probably the amount he's spent on this he could have gone several times. He has a phobia about travelling there. He doesn't want to go to a strange place he's never been before. It's out of his comfort zone. So this type of prospect appeals to a travel scammer. Just send money and she will come. The problem is that unless she speaks English, has a good job and can provide assurances that she will return to Ukraine she probably will not be granted a visitor visa to the US. He has to go there and the only option for him after that is a fiancée visa. But it's been over 2 years and that tells me this guy doesn't really want to go.

[TruthSeeker]

! Update

The OP has been determined to be a faker, a fraud. But the good thing is he gets us to discuss that may help some dealing with these same issues.

[Yohan]

Troll, but the question itself - send money or go there and find out more' in case of an 'internet-relationship' is a valid question. So many men were cheated sending money to women and they were surprised later on to find out that these women did not even exist.

The answer from members of HA to this question what to do is clear: Do not send any money!