The Myth and Fallacy of Social Skills (with Women)

[hypermak]

You ask that as if there has only been a single one. That in and of itself says a lot about you.

No, I ask as if there has been none

I’ve posted many things in this forum about my background, my activities, my professional life, and my altruistic life. If you’re that interested, you are free to review the record here, but responding directly to that question might tend to give you the wrong impression that I actually care what you think about all of it. I don’t. In fact, YOU are the one who’s all twisted in a knot because I look down on you and what you represent. That is not because of what you do, but because you have an inflated and narcissistic sense of yourself. Hopefully, I have sufficiently whittled your ego down to size. If not, I’d be glad to be even more brutally truthful with you, but I can assure you that you’d surely emotionally regret it (as much as you need it) little fragile one.

You spent far more words to dodge the bullet, avoid the question, than you could have to answer it directly. The lack of respect it totally mutual and if there is an ego, a deluded ego, to be resized, that's not mine.

LOL can you be even more "brutally truthful to me"? You already taught me who I am, who my family is, you have told countless members here how to live their lives, how to make tons of money, how to seek mental health, how to get hot girls. How altruistic of you!

At this point I think the most altruistic thing you can do is stop attacking me and other HA-ers and maybe stop screwing your brain with those injections. You might still be on time to avoid permanent damage and lead a placid life till old age.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

You ask that as if there has only been a single one. That in and of itself says a lot about you.

No, I ask as if there has been none

I’ve posted many things in this forum about my background, my activities, my professional life, and my altruistic life. If you’re that interested, you are free to review the record here, but responding directly to that question might tend to give you the wrong impression that I actually care what you think about all of it. I don’t. In fact, YOU are the one who’s all twisted in a knot because I look down on you and what you represent. That is not because of what you do, but because you have an inflated and narcissistic sense of yourself. Hopefully, I have sufficiently whittled your ego down to size. If not, I’d be glad to be even more brutally truthful with you, but I can assure you that you’d surely emotionally regret it (as much as you need it) little fragile one.

You spent far more words to dodge the bullet, avoid the question, than you could have to answer it directly. The lack of respect it totally mutual and if there is an ego, a deluded ego, to be resized, that's not mine.

LOL can you be even more "brutally truthful to me"? You already taught me who I am, who my family is, you have told countless members here how to live their lives, how to make tons of money, how to seek mental health, how to get hot girls. How altruistic of you!

At this point I think the most altruistic thing you can do is stop attacking me and other HA-ers and maybe stop screwing your brain with those injections. You might still be on time to avoid permanent damage and lead a placid life till old age.

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

[hypermak]

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

More bullet dodging, more one-liners about other people's mental state. By now it's clear to everyone who the trolls are. Oh but they don't count, because they're all losers and you don't care about their opinions

[Contrarian Expatriate]

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

More bullet dodging, more one-liners about other people's mental state. By now it's clear to everyone who the trolls are. Oh but they don't count, because they're all losers and you don't care about their opinions

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

[hypermak]

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

[Contrarian Expatriate]

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

[hypermak]

And the mentally ill trolling continues....

[Spencer]

Pm to wiseton

Dear wiseton

It's a PM but you post it here, too, in two separate threads no less!

if arrange this privacy call of only you and hyperduende and afterwards give true answer publicly on forum i will offer you following benficials

first....pay $150 to your helpings with zelle or paypal or crypto wallet or west union in 2 times....when you setup then i pay 50 and after finish and get your public result of is it the duende or is it not a duende i pay another 100

second...if you give me skype name and i call you with video so you see me and hear acent and ask questions on my postings for know if i am same man write the postings

please do this favor for truthing sake i happy to pay and below i give explanationings

I am disappointed PAG...given your obsession for the "truthing truther truth" I thought my case was worth a lot more than the paltry $150/250 you're prepared to offer Winston! But well, it's lockdown time and you can't go back to shifting boxes for a living, so I understand money is tight.

My answer is still no, by the way.

And about more questions, why did you get so hot and bothered when I posted the "sheeeet" meme picture I also posted to mock Stanfordguy a couple of months back? Are you black, too? Are you a SJW dying to fight a battle against those evil racist Italian chefs? I will charge you 0 USD for your explanation

Do intention say non truthing or you lost time perceptivnes for the meme not 2 months old you make more recent

never mind i offer small money for i give simple simon way for proofing and you dodge bulet

you only need talk wiseton not me so that sho who you are in truth

same i have to do sho who i am realy so proof 100% not shadow doubt for wiseton no dummy and he have sensing for people most other poster lacking

do you even agree he complete honest and open or also even denial this

for i ready to sho truth and you dodge to keep contamination forum with trash threadings with contarian expat

feel like you vindcitives want harm forum even

you feel very darkman with deep badman side and strange you come here gain

contarian expat use big word not mean braging but general write more educate and eloquancy than most america blackman many better 95% least but this not true iq not true intuitive not true sense he try hard find thing even it not there so we see he maybe in averge range overall iq of america not in above averge ranging or above for we see at end he belief you realy chefman really work profesinal expat in philipine no matter fact all say different no matter your behavor say otherwise no matter you dodge wiseton even run into arms other poster who you pretend not be contarian realy easy peasy to fool even if he realy make big money before when work tho that not mean i belief his story truth is not enough informations know truth or not truth just so so strange why he need to say everyday about his money status and hottie girl why need talk these so much

when my comment about american blackman iq below the america mean it fact proven truthing not meanman hi insultings meme

i not drop the requesting and you keep doging i look other ways to exposing you fake sucpupet man unles you cease and desist your happy abord asaultings and go way

you talk lockdown but i not have this resictive for i go out everyday when i want not strict where i stay and philipine handle lockdown very complexity way make life no fun so over toping complicate nonsenses

wisetong goodman truther so you even talk him phone he know how sound your voice so you need comply and i do same then we get truth

problem you not care real truth you big trol degenerate come forum piss shit all over poster you obsesive hate and hope so hope wiseton final upgrade qualities on forum get gone trashmans and even wiseton decide get me out i would acept his wiseman jugementings

but i so so see what the badman troll suckpupet darkman like you agendas is for bring destructiveness same we see holywood media banking liberal monster want do america so same your intention to wiseton so special forum that strive for growing and goodman spirit but atracting evil to thwartings all years hard works wiseton make

you need talk wiseton for proofing and only reason you hide is because even you delusion but stil you know deep down who you are that strangeman behind the public duende handle

do you feel ok come here make up stories and liar all time where consience you even badman have something yes or no

[Winston]

Several obvious proofs that social skills have NOTHING to do with attracting women or love/romance:

1. Look at most attractive couples in public. They act like normal people. They do not have any particularly good social skills nor are they super skilled in talking or persuasion. Their verbal skills tend to be average or even below average. Nothing special. Also, most married men in America in your local neighborhood are just average men with wives. They don't have amazing social skills, just average.

2. Many American women like the strong silent type, not the talkative type, because the strong silent type lets the woman do all the talking. For example, if you look like Arnold Schwarzenegger, and are strong and silent, women will like you. You don't have to be a skilled talker or orator.

In contrast, you could be Danny Devito and have a great personality and be funny and very talkative, but women will still not be attracted to you romantically or sexually because you aren't their type.

3. If you are Tom Cruise, you don't need any social skills at all. All you have to do is smile, be agreeable and polite, and go with the flow, and women will still love you or like you.

4. Social skills only matter in business and politics. For example, in the business world you gotta be articulate and polished, and present a professional attitude and persona, and talk to people with tact and diplomacy. Same in politics of course. You gotta tell people what you wannt hear if you wanna get far in politics or business or sales, etc. That's what Bill Clinton did during his 1992 campaign, as we all know, he told everyone what they wanted to hear. Thus social skills and communication skills matter only in politics or business. Not with women.

But with women, it's all about whether you are their type or not. It's very subjective. Two guys with the same looks and personality could experience totally different results with women, because attraction is mysterious and often intangible and cannot be pinned to something logical like looks or money or even charm or personality. There's no linear logic to it. No consistent pattern that can be identified. It's very mysterious. Most women love their man "just because they do", not because of something he has or something that can be pinned down logically or concretely. That's the way it is.

Think about it.

[Winston]

No. Social skills is more like communication skills and your ability to get along with others using tact, diplomacy, etc and the ability to size people up so you can know how to act and talk around them. This is more useful in the BUSINESS world, where one needs to be professional and tactful and diplomatic and communicate well. But NOT in the dating scene, for obvious reasons. If the girl isn't into you, or doesn't like your looks or vibe, or has nothing in common with you, then your social skills will be a NON-FACTOR. Think about it. Have you ever used "social skills" or tact or diplomacy to make a girl like you if she wasn't into you and didn't find you to be her type? Of course not. Even if you have great communication skills and are a great orator, that's not gonna create attraction in a girl who isn't into you. See what I mean? This is common sense.

I think what you are describing is "emotional intelligence" which is said to be more important than IQ in getting to the top of organizations.

Also, social skills involves more than what you describe. It involves being able to pick up on which girls you have a high chance of succeeding with and also when to cut and run gracefully to meet someone else. So it is just more than just behavior, it is picking up on social cues and adjusting accordingly.

Well yes, that's important too. But I would call that "people reading skills" or the ability to size up people. That comes with experience and also with being sensitive and intuitive too. Some guys cannot read others at all, they are literalists and everything needs to be spelled out to them clearly. They cannot read subtle nuances or body language or hints.

However, I don't know if "people reading skills" is part of "social skills" because you see, there is no official definition of social skills. People tend to use that term "social skills" as a SHAMING strategy to explain why some guys can't get women or get rejected a lot. No one defines it really. They just use it to shame others. I'm sure you know what I mean. Even in this forum, people use that concept to shame others too. But in reality, there's no logical basis for it, as I explained above in the previous post.

Btw, if a woman already likes you, she will put out signs and cues. And she will look at you and make eye contact of course, with a look that says she's interested. At that point, you got it easy. All you gotta do is just go with the flow, and ask her out on a date, and then at the end of the date you say "Would you like to come over?" or "Would you like to come inside?" and she will be glad to, and then you can get intimate, and based on her body language while making out, you can gauge how far she's willing to do, whether it's just kissing, making out, or going all the way. You see that in the movies all the time. No special "social skills" are required to do that. Any average guy can do that, if the woman is into him and wants him.

The only time some "skills" may matter is if she is on the borderline of liking you and not, or playing hard to get. But such skills are not hard or complex. Men have been doing that for thousands of years. It should be something natural. Not some "secret formula" that you have to pay to learn. Geez. PUA's BS all the time, and what they say does not reflect reality accurately.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

Btw, if a woman already likes you, she will put out signs and cues. And she will look at you and make eye contact of course, with a look that says she's interested. At that point, you got it easy. All you gotta do is just go with the flow, and ask her out on a date, and then at the end of the date you say "Would you like to come over?" or "Would you like to come inside?" and she will be glad to, and then you can get intimate, and based on her body language while making out, you can gauge how far she's willing to do, whether it's just kissing, making out, or going all the way. You see that in the movies all the time. No special "social skills" are required to do that. Any average guy can do that, if the woman is into him and wants him.

I can't co-sign on that. In fact, I ignore girls who put out signs and cues (with the exception of one in particular). Girls who do this are generally attention who*res who are seeing you as a potential source of supply, or they are working girls trying to be obvious for business.

I also disagree with your "ask them on a date" theory. That might have been true in the 1980's and before, but young women are now in the mode of exchanging social media information to check you out first, then arrange a "meet up" if she approves of you. If you ask a hot girl on a date, she might not even know how to react. I was out with a recent university grad last month who told me that she has never even been out on a date in her life, but she used to "hook up" all the time in college. Having said that, if you are a guy who CAN take girls out, you have a HUGE advantage because so few guys do that now.

Finally, you mentioned seeing that paradigm in the movies. Anything you see in the movies is fake, fantasy world and real life only rarely comports with what is in the movies. I am surprised to hear that from you actually. So many men have been screwed up because they believe what is portrayed in the movies about women, that I have to check you on that. If fathers were not kicked out of homes as much as they are, they could be teaching their sons these lessons about female nature. Instead, we are on a third generation of Hollywood-raised boys and the result is very clear.

[Winston]

But CE. That's what happened with all my girlfriends before. They signaled interest in me, then I asked them out and got their number. Then things escalated naturally from there. They would come over after the date and start kissing and getting physical. It's not just the movies. That's how it works in real life too. If the girl likes you, then that's how it goes. Even an older Chinese lady that I used to date long ago in Taiwan, followed that same order of events with me. Same with Dianne. Same with my exes in America. Same with my girlfriends in Russia and China, etc.

Haven't you ever had a girlfriend who was not a whore? If so, didn't things progress just as I outlined above?

Movies are not total fiction. They contain a lot of metaphorical truth and artistic truth in symbolic form. See what Natalie Portman said in "V For Vendetta".

"Politicians use lies to cover up the truth. Artists use lies to tell the truth."

It's been that way for thousands of years. I'm not talking about online girls. I'm talking about girls you meet in person from work, friends, public events, bars, cold approach, etc. If they really like you, for whatever reason, it's easy to bed them from there and only a matter of time. You don't have to do anything special. Come on. We all know that.

[Spencer]

But CE. That's what happened with all my girlfriends before. They signaled interest in me, then I asked them out and got their number. Then things escalated naturally from there. They would come over after the date and start kissing and getting physical. It's not just the movies. That's how it works in real life too. If the girl likes you, then that's how it goes. Even an older Chinese lady that I used to date long ago in Taiwan, followed that same order of events with me. Same with Dianne. Same with my exes in America. Same with my girlfriends in Russia and China, etc.

Haven't you ever had a girlfriend who was not a whore? If so, didn't things progress just as I outlined above?

Movies are not total fiction. They contain a lot of metaphorical truth and artistic truth in symbolic form. See what Natalie Portman said in "V For Vendetta".

"Politicians use lies to cover up the truth. Artists use lies to tell the truth."

It's been that way for thousands of years. I'm not talking about online girls. I'm talking about girls you meet in person from work, friends, public events, bars, cold approach, etc. If they really like you, for whatever reason, it's easy to bed them from there and only a matter of time. You don't have to do anything special. Come on. We all know that.

Wiseton contarian using the sugardadying way not purity naturlings like you make for purity romanticings so apple ornge but if you like try other way contarian also shem are big expererencing in ukrania

[Winston]

Well Spencer, I've had whores and bar girls and freelancers in Angeles City too. And I've paid for sex of course. And it works that way too. They talk to me, flirt with me, negotiate a deal, and come to my room, etc. Similar process, only in this case, it's for money, not love. Why is that hard for CE to understand? This is something simple and basic. Everyone knows this.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

But CE. That's what happened with all my girlfriends before. They signaled interest in me, then I asked them out and got their number.

You and I are two different people. If I go to a club or an event, I will have a keen eye for the BEST looking girls there. Once I have been there for awhile, I will know who I am interested in. Girls who bump into me (on purpose), chat me up, or send some type of understated signal are ignored. I only look for chances to interact with the few girls I want to talk to.

The exception is if a girl parks herself somewhere in my line of sight so she can get noticed by me, AND I find her attractive. In those cases, I DO pay attention to that signal and take action on it. For me, that is about the most overt signal a quality girl will do because she is still waiting for you to take the first step like a man.

By brother taught me to always do the selecting of the girls, not simply be the selected because you'll never really get the girls you truly want. I have come to agree with him on that!