Why Looks Matter Much More To Women Than Personality, Game, Or Confidence

[jamesbond]

This is an interesting video going into detail on why a man's looks matter much more to women than personality, game or confidence.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

Over the years, I have come to realize that looks only matter to young women from age 18 to 28 in the West. There is a shift that happens in the female "Epiphany Phase" when they realize their SMV is declining and they rush to catch a beta provider, his less than ideal looks notwithstanding.

Outside of the West where women are more traditional, the Epiphany Phase comes much earlier. For example, in the FSU countries, women begin seeking provider men around age 22, and again, looks become less important at that point.

Personality and game are of far less importance in the Epiphany Phase. Confidence however, tends to be a by product of success and accomplishment and women pick up on that quite naturally. A young man who has yet to be accomplished could have natural confidence in approaching women, but it is not congruent with his relatively low status so it is not as important as his looks.

In my view, indifference and the air of not being so impressed with particular women is a truer show of status. First, women tend to want that which they cannot have so easily, and also indifference tends to show that the man has options in his life. IMO, it is this male indifference that gets often called confidence but the two are actually quite different.

[Shemp]

Personality, game and confidence are variations on the same theme, which is how you behave. If you behave stupidly, no amount of looks is going to help. Especially in long term relationships, behavior trumps everything: no one wants to be around a jerk, no matter how beautiful or handsome.

Looks matters a lot, and there is a limit to how much you can change looks. If a woman has her heart set on certain looks, no amount of behavior can change that. Same as woman who wants a pretty young poodle isn't going to be fully happy with a ragged old mixed-breed working dog.In the other hand, if typical women are capable of loving dogs on general, it stands to reason their criteria for men aren't all that high, unless they are considering the man as breeding stock. For pure sex, women will often accept objectively ugly men, once they get to know the man well.

In other words, behavior is what really matters in the long run. And since behavior is what men have most control over, that is what they should focus on, after doing what they can to improve looks (get rid of those pot bellies, add muscle, dress nicely, get a decent haircut).

Money and status can help you get your foot in the door, so to speak. But only looks plus behavior can earn true love.

[Zambales]

It all depends on her experience and intelligence. A woman in her twenties is far more likely to base a man on his looks than one in her forties for example due to her inexperience with men. The older female who may have been in a relationship or two with abusers or losers, should, if she's smart enough, realise her mistakes and therefore focus less on how attractive he is and more on his personality.

[Cornfed]

Why are you people commenting on this? Your only recent experience is renting whores of one form or another and the sexual market is completely different from when you were young.

[Neo]

As for what women like, I think it may be more or less irrelevant. The real important thing is knowledge: Does the man know how to act and what to say? I am not talking about game, just how to present himself. For example, not coming across as drooling, seemingly patient, not easily upset or rattled, doesn't embarrass himself or act silly, etc.

[flowerthief00]

Looks IS the biggest factor on which we choose dating/sexual partners for both men and women. And not only that, if you have looks you will probably have the other stuff (money, status, confidence, a social life, etc). Society rewards good looks to the extent that everything comes easy to those who are good-looking.
If life were an RPG and you could choose your starting stats, you would want to put all your points into looks.

We don't like to admit this hard fact due to the reality that we have limited control over our looks.

[xiongmao]

I did a dating lesson with my Chinese students. Pretty much all the girls put that they wanted to find a TALL guy. It's super, super important - even more important than looks.