Are men too self-concerned/paranoid about the race they are?

[FreeYourMind]

It depends on your perspective. I'm more interested in my prospects for dating and close friendship in a country than how racist is might be, within certain bounds of course (I can't tolerate being attacked or confronted just because of my race but if certain people want to silently hate me, than so be it). My life revolves around my circle of close contacts and whoever my gf or dates are. I don't need to be hired cus I'm not looking for a job so I won't get the potential short end of that stick in a racist country.

In the USA, I would much rather be an average looking young black American guy with decent job and money than an average looking young asian guy with the same. I'm pretty sure blacks face a lot more negative racism, at least in the part of USA where I grew up. But a black guy also has much better prospects with the types of women I find attractive, both at home and abroad, than do Asian guys.

Black guys have natural physical advantages which attract a large subset of women in many parts of the world in spite of the stigma against them. The bad boy thug image is more viscerally attractive than the straight laced hard worker image. And other stereotypes abound which are generally in favor of black guys and against asians. And if a black guy is polite and well behaved overseas (against the stereotypes), people like him cus its like being around a tame gangster, lol, especially if he looks good.

Now take Phils vs. Thai for a white guy. According to you, many to most Thais are quite racist against white guys while most people in PI are color blind (ie non racist). Is that correct? In spite of all that, it is possible to live a decent low cost life in Thailand with great food and infrastructure and access to many attractive women without being physically bothered or harassed if you behave as long as you are not very unlucky. And if you don't like Thais or the language, there are plenty of foreign ghettos where you can have everything without even having to look at many Thais in your daily life except in the background. Many of the locals in such areas are non-Thai.

In Phils, the quality of life is generally much worse (food, infrastructure, accommodation) while the cost is significantly higher. And as I've said before, girls have healthier and more attractive on average in Thai than Phils, and I'm talking about the ones available to foreigners. Phils is generally much more dangerous for unprovoked street crime too except for a few areas such as Davao City and perhaps Baguio. And people in PI do often discriminate against foreigners, by charging a lot more for instance.

There is a lot more to consider when choosing a location than the degree of perceived racism against your particular race. Right now, I'm in Dominican Republic and so far, this place seems color blind, one of the least racist places I've been on the surface with the exception of the way Haitians get treated by some here. I mean, you see all the US races here with Asians and pure whites being relatively rare. And they are all Domicanos. But this country has many other serious issues which make it difficult to live in for many vis-a-vis a country like Thailand.

I agree with you on Black males: yeah, they face more racism than Asian men, but at least they are seen as more desirable than Asian men even though many females would not marry a Black man--they just want to have sex with them. To be honest, I'm kinda shocked about how many Black men are involved in the MRA (Men's Rights Advocate) movement. I would think that many Black men would be as successful--or even more successful in some cases--than White males in the United States and other Anglo countries. In fact, I know some Black men that do better than White men in attracting and dating females, strangely enough.

I'm kind of surprised too, but this site seems to be the most "diverse" of any of them in that the posters seem to be comprised of roughly equal amounts of Blacks, Whites and Asians (but curiously no hispanics). Now if we could all just get along a little better lol.
The bottom line is that the ultra-feminazied Anglosphere is a dating and mating nightmare for all but the poser-alphas and some of the rich. Outside the Anglosphere it seems White guys have an advantage in some places, but there is a lot of good information found here which helps everybody of whatever background in deciding where to visit or relocate.

[E_Irizarry]

It depends on your perspective. I'm more interested in my prospects for dating and close friendship in a country than how racist is might be, within certain bounds of course (I can't tolerate being attacked or confronted just because of my race but if certain people want to silently hate me, than so be it). My life revolves around my circle of close contacts and whoever my gf or dates are. I don't need to be hired cus I'm not looking for a job so I won't get the potential short end of that stick in a racist country.

In the USA, I would much rather be an average looking young black American guy with decent job and money than an average looking young asian guy with the same. I'm pretty sure blacks face a lot more negative racism, at least in the part of USA where I grew up. But a black guy also has much better prospects with the types of women I find attractive, both at home and abroad, than do Asian guys.

Black guys have natural physical advantages which attract a large subset of women in many parts of the world in spite of the stigma against them. The bad boy thug image is more viscerally attractive than the straight laced hard worker image. And other stereotypes abound which are generally in favor of black guys and against asians. And if a black guy is polite and well behaved overseas (against the stereotypes), people like him cus its like being around a tame gangster, lol, especially if he looks good.

Now take Phils vs. Thai for a white guy. According to you, many to most Thais are quite racist against white guys while most people in PI are color blind (ie non racist). Is that correct? In spite of all that, it is possible to live a decent low cost life in Thailand with great food and infrastructure and access to many attractive women without being physically bothered or harassed if you behave as long as you are not very unlucky. And if you don't like Thais or the language, there are plenty of foreign ghettos where you can have everything without even having to look at many Thais in your daily life except in the background. Many of the locals in such areas are non-Thai.

In Phils, the quality of life is generally much worse (food, infrastructure, accommodation) while the cost is significantly higher. And as I've said before, girls have healthier and more attractive on average in Thai than Phils, and I'm talking about the ones available to foreigners. Phils is generally much more dangerous for unprovoked street crime too except for a few areas such as Davao City and perhaps Baguio. And people in PI do often discriminate against foreigners, by charging a lot more for instance.

There is a lot more to consider when choosing a location than the degree of perceived racism against your particular race. Right now, I'm in Dominican Republic and so far, this place seems color blind, one of the least racist places I've been on the surface with the exception of the way Haitians get treated by some here. I mean, you see all the US races here with Asians and pure whites being relatively rare. And they are all Domicanos. But this country has many other serious issues which make it difficult to live in for many vis-a-vis a country like Thailand.

I agree with you on Black males: yeah, they face more racism than Asian men, but at least they are seen as more desirable than Asian men even though many females would not marry a Black man--they just want to have sex with them. To be honest, I'm kinda shocked about how many Black men are involved in the MRA (Men's Rights Advocate) movement. I would think that many Black men would be as successful--or even more successful in some cases--than White males in the United States and other Anglo countries. In fact, I know some Black men that do better than White men in attracting and dating females, strangely enough.

I'm kind of surprised too, but this site seems to be the most "diverse" of any of them in that the posters seem to be comprised of roughly equal amounts of Blacks, Whites and Asians (but curiously no hispanics). Now if we could all just get along a little better lol.
The bottom line is that the ultra-feminazied Anglosphere is a dating and mating nightmare for all but the poser-alphas and some of the rich. Outside the Anglosphere it seems White guys have an advantage in some places, but there is a lot of good information found here which helps everybody of whatever background in deciding where to visit or relocate.

¡Perdonéme pero Ud le equivoca!

well-informed (Dominican-born but American raised),
me (American born and raised but has Brazilian roots),
JVargasBronx (American with 100 percent Dominican roots),
Jacaré (Brasileiro),
colibri (Mexican with American and natal home Mexican roots),
***JP*** (Puerto Rican),
skateboardstephen (Black but Latino than a muthafcuka!),
Falcon (American with Asian heritage but Latino than a muthafcka!),
AmericanInMexico (probably looks like a White Cuban but is Latino than a muthafcka!),
Renata (Trinidad and Tobago is literally 21 miles off-shore of Venezuela although T.N.T is the fish-out-of-water part of the West Indies along with Guyana), etc.!

Like half of us on this list have stronger Brazilian roots, but Portugal used to be ruled by Spain in the 15th Century for 80 or so years hence borrowing a lot of language syntax and culture
from Spain.

Brazil is the only Latin American country that doesn't speak Spanish (Belize could be included but not really), so we are not truly Hispanic, but we are Latino in a lot of ways.

[FreeYourMind]

Sorry if I misidentified anyone, Hispanic is often difficult to classify because Hispanics range from 100% European to 100% Black and everything in between. A lot of mixed White and Asian men here also but most seem to identify as Asian. I try to go by how an individual identifies himself, seems from my reading of posts that very few here post from an American or Anglo Hispanic perspective.

[E_Irizarry]

Sorry if I misidentified anyone, Hispanic is often difficult to classify because Hispanics range from 100% European to 100% Black and everything in between. A lot of mixed White and Asian men here also but most seem to identify as Asian. I try to go by how an individual identifies himself, seems from my reading of posts that very few here post from an American or Anglo Hispanic perspective.

....that's because Anglo-Hispanics are doing well in the U.S. of Gay: Anglo-Hispanic communities stick together like glue, ask dancehall-pop artist Sean Paul. #lol

If you have ever been to Little Village section of Chicago (en español: La Villita se llama), the Latin Kings are Mexicans that run that m.f. I have had an arduous time, in Chicago lately, dating Mexican and stateside-raised American-Mex girls because they were worried about a gang member catching us in public because I don't look (nor am I) Mexican or Mex-American.

[FreeYourMind]

I've noticed that the Mexicans where I live mix less than any other group, even though a lot of them look White and probably consider themselves White if they had to pick a race.

Then again, Mexican girls are more obese even than White and Black women, and I have no interest in heavies. I see few over the age of 18 or so that aren't already overweight. The American diet seems guaranteed to make most women into fatties.

[polya]

This isn't the first time these issues have been raised here. I wish the OPwould have done resaerch instead of re-inventing the wheel again. I'm shocked how many "white knights" are spelling out the obvious, as the OP is a black woman and should have seen "racism" in her life.

[skateboardstephen]

....Right now, I'm in Dominican Republic and so far, this place seems color blind, one of the least racist places I've been on the surface with the exception of the way Haitians get treated by some here. I mean, you see all the US races here with Asians and pure whites being relatively rare. And they are all Dominicanos. But this country has many other serious issues which make it difficult to live in for many vis-a-vis a country like Thailand.

*Playing SkateboardStephen's Advocate* Ahhh hahh! You do realize that Dominicans in NY-NJ-CT-Eastern PA loathe the majority of Black Americans or anybody of the Afro diaspora excluding Dominicans themselves. I believe it's mostly because they come from squalor so they don't want to it resonate with them after coming over to the "land of [new] opportunity" sotospeak.

Therefore, if they were to stay that way, then they feel that they are becoming compared to people whom look very similar to them and that's *drum roll* Black Americans; we all know how Black Americans, generally-speaking, fare in the US [despite the "talented tenth" i.e. celebs among other power figures of the Black Am ethnicity].

[I'm] just saying....

I was having a conversation with i Dominican in Philly about how much cleaner i though Manhattan was compared to Philly and this Dominican dude replied "porque no hay negros alla" and mind you this dude could easily be mistaken for African American he looked like he could have been my bother easily.

[Jester]

Look on a shithole like Plenty of Fish or Craigslist and you'll often see women saying "No black men please" and things like that. I see on dating sites more prejudice against dating black men, but aside from being prejudiced, I think it is because of the perception that black men are poor, unemployed, uneducated, etc. In other words, if the perception was that black men were rich, educated, and gainfully employed, then black would be considered attractive.

As a brother of two girls, I would say it is not about money, but about
(1) Is my sister just a trophy for the sonofabitch to impress his friends?
(2) Less ambition and work ethic and family pressure to succeed, in traditionally poorer groups.

If a guy demonstrates serious commitment, and serious ambition, these objections would be overcome.

OTOH, on web dating sites, there is no opportunity to screen out the playas. So a girl just crosses her fingers and hopes. And tries to improve the odds of a good match, by eliminating a large source of non-serious types.

Yes, I'm sure it's offensive. And probably unnecessary.

I'm just saying that it's not about poverty. And it can be overcome, but the web is just a terrible place to do it.

[Jester]

One of the comments:
Here's a better idea: "The Make Me Get a Job and Move Out of My Parent's House" app.

Can we make that a thread?

[Teal Lantern]

I agree with you on Black males: yeah, they face more racism than Asian men, but at least they are seen as more desirable than Asian men even though many females would not marry a Black man--they just want to have sex with them. To be honest, I'm kinda shocked about how many Black men are involved in the MRA (Men's Rights Advocate) movement. I would think that many Black men would be as successful--or even more successful in some cases--than White males in the United States and other Anglo countries. In fact, I know some Black men that do better than White men in attracting and dating females, strangely enough.

For black guys that don't just want to be a plaything, that's not a 'feature'.
What Rock called a 'tame gangster' (well, I've been called worse. ) is, up to the early adult years, about as respected among his peer group as an Asian kid who's terrible at math (yeah, I went there) would be. I.e., not at all.

Fun to play with, but not good enough to marry vs. good for marrying after the "fun/best" years are over.
How you see it will depend on what group you're in and how you feel about marriage.

[ILoveBlackAmericanWomen]

I think it is because of the perception that black men are poor, unemployed, uneducated, etc. In other words, if the perception was that black men were rich, educated, and gainfully employed, then black would be considered attractive.

In the hypergamous West, racial matters are complicated by the perception of one race or another being wealthier, alpha, educated, etc.

Simply some observations.

Well said. I have to agree

[ILoveBlackAmericanWomen]

I see men asking "what country where Asian men are accepted" or "Place Black men are liked" and it comes off very strange. No country has people that are zero percent racist. I think men are overly concerned and focused or paranoid about there race. Every woman is not concerned with your race. If you are a husband material guy she will want you. If you are rejected by a girl it's not always because you're Black or Asian or White. If you come across those racist women they were not worth your time anyways. Everything is not Black and White (Asian, Indian whatever). I notice a lot of superficial wants going on here. Less focusing on a woman's heart and inside mainly what race she is what she looks like etc. Am I the only one to notice this?

You clearly don't know anything about how East Asian males are portrayed as badly as possible in the anglosphere and this is done on purpose. I don't really want to waste any time explaining this again to somebody like you who clearly is just on here attention whoring and trying to convince us that American women are good when we all know all races of American women are complete and utter crap.

In short, look up Sessue Hayakawa and read the first two paragraphs about how him being the first sex symbol of holllywood led to jealousy and desxualization/villainization of East Asian males in anglosphere media and continues to this day. Just take the Red Dawn 2012 move as an example.
Also look up the film called The Slanted Screen and look up some videos of Yul Kwon talking about East Asian American male issues.

I know who Yul Kwon is I have seen him speak on Asian American male issues. I will look up Sessue in a minute. I never said people don't ostracize races. I'm Black there is nothing you can say about Asians being negatively portrayed that is worse than my race. African peoples are the most ostracized people and you know that. You can call me names all you want to. That other guy already went in on you so there is no need for me to. You can't even see a question you disagree with without getting an attitude and throwing juvenile insults then you wonder why women pass you up. I know all about a race being portrayed bad and I know how Black women are portrayed just look at this website yet I know every rejection and or negative thing that happens to people of color is not because of race. Yes there are people who are racist yet there are more people who could careless about your race. But the thing is not to live your life based off of how society views your race.

One thing I have noticed is Asians never stand up for themselves as a whole when people publicly ostracize them. If you take it people will not respect you and will continue to do so. I'm specifically talking about the few men here who I have noticed are paranoid that everyone is out to get them because of their race and/or they feel self conscious about their race when it comes to women and in general.

[ILoveBlackAmericanWomen]

This one's from today, "Make Me Asian' App For Google Play Blasted As Racist, Offensive"

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/2 ... 72573.html

There's a Native American app too. I don't think anyone would even consider making a Blackface app.

That's the point I was making. The reason why no one would ever consider making a Blackface is because they know Black people will make a BIG stand and not go for that. Asians don't take up for themselves as a whole when it comes to racism and that is why White people still do these things to Asians. I would love to see Asians stand up against this and stop putting up with racism. If Asians want change in how Asians are viewed I believe Asians must do something about it.

[lone_yakuza]

.

[ILoveBlackAmericanWomen]

I tired of people saying that race does not matter when it does. Most American women are racist for sure. A lot of them want the super duper white guy with money if they can't get him they will stay in their own race.This seems to be the standard especially in the U.S.The problem is is that every one (at least i can talk about the Americas) wants to be eurocentric. I see this same stuff in Brazil where the media is straight up white washed. Then you have mestiços here who in the U.S. wouldn't even be mistaken for white calling them selves white and will argue that they are white it is weird. I see the same paterns here that i saw in the U.S. with a lot of Afro-brazilian mens dateing options(all though it is no where as bad as black american men) the White brazilian women i see them with are either fat or white trash but when they are fine or even average you don't even see this women any where near black men,You won't see them any where with in walking distance of a favela.Now i do see some black men here with fine women but they are usually black women or mullatto women.I saw this black dude from são paulo with the white brazilian chick big as a house and this guy was good looking, i was like damb dude you could have found a black brasilian chick way better than that.

When i was in the States i used to go out with a white friend of mine and there was an Asian chick and a black chick on my white friends dick and trying to diss me saying shit like i probably live at home with my mom and some other shit trying to sterotype me. They where cleary doing that because i was black.There where times i would be talking to some hispanic chick and she will make up a lie about why she doesn't want a relationship and blah blah blah then i see them latter with some white dude.

I used to go to a Brazilian church in the states to meet some of the immigrants in my area.One time i came up and a group of Brazilian White chicks and they where talking to a Brazilian dude that i knew i said whats up to the guy and when i rolled up all this chicks just up and split leaving the guy there.Shit like this just makes you say hmmmmmmm.

It seem as if when women are at their best they think dateing a black dude is beneath them. And i can't speak for Asian me too much but i can see the same bullshit because i have a good friend who is Asian and has these problems with women flaken on him for now reason.The dude had all his shit in order and good looking.

Where i am now i can say it is not as bad as the States though.But even down here when i am trying to get money out the ATM there will be White Brazilians looking over their shoulder at me while they get their money.Then when they find out i am Amerian their attitude changes it is weird. I am going off topic now ...

I know racism exist I am saying I believe a few bad experiences makes some men so deeply wounded and traumatized that they are overly conscious of the race they are and the race and gender everyone else is. They can no longer see people as people but groups and every negative interaction with someone they say their race is the reason or if someone does something negative to them they blame the person's race and or gender as the reason they were disrespected.