Winston wrote: ↑April 30th, 2024, 7:25 pm
Pea, I have a question. How come Filipinas always TAKE more than they give? Even good Filipinas do that. Hence the old adage "It's better to give than to receive" definitely does NOT apply in the Philippines. You can't deny that. This is 100 percent obvious. People there always love to receive, but not to give much. Even good Filipinas follow this pattern. That's why Filipinas always say "Don't forget my pasalubong" when you go on a trip. Isn't that unfair? Also, even on Valentine's Day, our Filipina girlfriends never give us anything, not even chocolate hearts or candies or flowers. Why? Why are they always take take take, receive receive receive? In the PH, to receive definitely seems like the highest desire. lol. You know that right? You can't deny it. It's crystal clear and obvious.
Interesting question.
Remember that, in a culture like the Filipino, the joy of giving is constantly spoiled by the
"utang", the pressure of having to give.
While Filipinos are usually not so eager to give, or give away, they strongly feel a responsibility, an obligation, even, to help their family, relatives, and even friends in time of need, if asked. The last two statements - "in time of need" and "if asked" - are key here.
The definition of "need" can be very arbitrary, from a legit medical emergency that will save someone's life, to the desire to own the a new mobile phone, to the greed in wanting to own another condo or plot of land.
And about "if asked", Filipinos will rarely shy away from asking. In their culture, there is no shame in asking, even if the chances of getting are slim. They feel even less shame when they know that the recipient of their request is allegedly wealthier than them, or is known to have a soft heart. Most foreigners, in their eyes at least, tick both of those boxes.
It's a shitty culture, and one that encourages a chain of debt, material or metaphorical. Person A needs money from Person B. Person B doesn't have the money but cannot say no, as they have been helped by Person A in the past, or they know they migh need a favour from Person A in the near future. Person B has no other choice than asking Person C to "loan" them some money. Person C gets persuaded because they're family, or good friends with Person B. Also Person C might be, or want to be, indebted with Person B.
The net effect is entangling yet another individual into the chain.
The worst happens when Person A doesn't really need money, but has been convinced to join the umpteenth scam, where they are "guaranteed" that, if they get their hands on 100 and "invest", they will be able to get 150 within a few weeks or months. Sometimes they fall into the scam with their own money. Most of the time, and I find this utterly odious, they do nurture some suspicions about the offer but decide to go for it with someone else's money. They borrow 100 from a family or close friends, knowing that there is a high chance that the lender will never see that money again. Since this is indeed the case, we find two people in debt with each other, and a scammer who pockets the "investment" and makes a vague excuse about "the markets not going well".
I tell you all this by personal experience. I have been asked for money to pay for someone's mom's heart surgery. The guy went as far as showing me a photo of her mom in a hospital bed. I know the guy was lying because, at the same time, he was deep into the usual scam (based on an imaginary new crypto token). Also, every time I asked him to meet his Mom, he suspiciously said he didn't want to.
He "borrowed" 100,000 from me and only managed to partly repay his debt because he worked for me for a few months, taking care of my closing business in Davao.