What are Winston's personality defects and character flaws?

[Jackal]

Winston,

When you're just acting as an individual, you might not be so bad, but when you are running a forum, every negative aspect of your personality is magnified and affects everyone else. The problem is that running a forum requires more responsibility than you want to have.

As another poster mentioned in another thread, inaction is also a choice with consequences.

Just like it's no big deal to do nothing when you're alone in your house, but if you're a security guard on duty and you see a robbery in progress, then doing nothing is a choice with many negative consequences.

Basically, you're the boss here, but you don't have a good personality for leadership/management positions. In other kinds of work, however, you might be great. You're good at charming people in the short term, but over the long term, people tend to get frustrated with you.

Perhaps it would be more suited to your personality if you had a blog focused on yourself rather than a forum. Everything here is so centered around your personality anyway. And other people could create a forum similar to this elsewhere.

[onezero4u]

why not just do the best you can whenever and wherever you can & not give a f**k what other people think???

id only take serious advice from people of confidence not internet folk or website trolls

[DelusionBuster]

Winston:

based on your past and present actions, whether as forum owner or not, you come off as:

1) a p***y

2) a mangina

3) a spineless wimp

4) a dumbass

These are traits generally not suited for running a discussion forum, capably and effectively.

Now, all that crap you described about yourself (generous, polite, etc.) is ok and has a place, but they are ultimately secondary. You could be all that, and still be the 4 things I just listed above. Your forum will still go to shit if all you are is nice to people.

You should admit that others see you more objectively and honestly than you do. Making changes is not so hard if you take it slowly. Your problem is that you don't try. You whine like a little girl, but never take action. You have to get off your ass, and take one step forward. That's how positive change happens.

Also, lose some weight. Not only will you be more healthy, but you won't look like a lardass in your photos.

[Jester]

Winston, to be honest, you have a TONNE of defects. It would take three topics and a turntable just to touch the tip of the iceberg!

RLOL



Blue, Blue, Blue....

still LOL



Odbo does a beatdown... Winston is down... then Blue kicks him...

{I really shouldn't drink so much on Saturdays...]

(still LOL )

[Jester]

Winston, to be honest, you have a TONNE of defects. It would take three topics and a turntable just to touch the tip of the iceberg!

RLOL



Blue, Blue, Blue....

still LOL



Odbo does a beatdown... Winston is down... then Blue kicks him...

{I really shouldn't drink so much on Saturdays...]

(still LOL )

still LOL...


coughing...

[Jester]

Winston:

based on your past and present actions, whether as forum owner or not, you come off as:

1) a p***y

2) a mangina

3) a spineless wimp

4) a dumbass

These are traits generally not suited for running a discussion forum, capably and effectively.

Now, all that crap you described about yourself (generous, polite, etc.) is ok and has a place, but they are ultimately secondary. You could be all that, and still be the 4 things I just listed above. Your forum will still go to shit if all you are is nice to people.

You should admit that others see you more objectively and honestly than you do. Making changes is not so hard if you take it slowly. Your problem is that you don't try. You whine like a little girl, but never take action. You have to get off your ass, and take one step forward. That's how positive change happens.

Also, lose some weight. Not only will you be more healthy, but you won't look like a lardass in your photos.

Your critics are your friends.

[Jester]

Winston,

When you're just acting as an individual, you might not be so bad, but when you are running a forum, every negative aspect of your personality is magnified and affects everyone else. The problem is that running a forum requires more responsibility than you want to have.

As another poster mentioned in another thread, inaction is also a choice with consequences.

Just like it's no big deal to do nothing when you're alone in your house, but if you're a security guard on duty and you see a robbery in progress, then doing nothing is a choice with many negative consequences.

Basically, you're the boss here, but you don't have a good personality for leadership/management positions. In other kinds of work, however, you might be great.

All true.

Winston is a great thinker, a great entrepreneur, and has huge balls to put himself out there as he does.

But he has utterly no sense of the energy exchange involved in dealing with people.

Logic, reason, blah blah... Winston the Universe is composed of Energy not "logic". Logic is for corpses - like watching a dissection on CSI or one of those other Feminist sex-and-dissection shows. Real live human beings thrive on energy and feelings, not logic.

For God's sake please stop asking "Why".

To paraphrase Yoda... there is no why... only do or not do.

Your left brain is highly developed. It is like Veeger in search of its Creator (in the old Star Trek episode). It NEEDS the right brain - which has been stunted by Taiwanese rigidity, then cauterized by U.S.-suburban upbringing.

It is time to let it awake. Take dance classes and become great. Take acting classes and star in them. Sing a song and put it on YouTube. You have the balls to be laughed at and keep on going - so now don't be afraid to put a smile on people's faces.

Life isn't all about feeding the Logic lobes of the brain. You have to see the absurdity of people and love them anyway.

[Jester]

Well, Winston, you are doing relatively fine compared to some other members on this board which I'll refuse to name, and many guys in the MGTOW, TFL, men's rights, American expat, and other communities. To all those who think HA is becoming a dump, try their forums instead. You will most likely be scrambling back onto HA again.

Falcon what is "TFL"?

OK, you do get defensive too easily, as well as some other issues, but imagine if some of the other forum members here are running this forum instead. You're doing a relatively good job.

Indeed you are, Winston. You have the best expat forum in the world right now. You are a young guy and you are still learning. Don't stop. Keep learning.

Leadership is a bitch, ain't it? But it sure beats the alternative.

[All_That_Is_Man]

What are [my] true personality defects?

You seem like a decent guy to me. However, the word is you're an asshole.



[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpbQGoP4 ... el&list=UL[/youtube]

[Winston]

Why in bloody f**k do you have to make a huge thread about what's wrong with your own character? I believe it's good to get outside input from time to time but if you don't have any internal judgment capability what kind of human are you? You're a sheep that moves with the herd. I personally KNOW my strengths and flaws. I'll be the first one to tell you what they are.

I also believe that I know myself and my strengths and weaknesses. But there are some out there, esp women, who tell me that I don't, and that they see flaws in me that I don't notice. Some people think they know me better than I know myself. That's why I started this thread, to find out what I'm overlooking. Everyone thinks their opinion is right. If someone thinks that I'm a person of bad character, they will usually say "Everyone is lying to you" when I tell them that most people like my personality because I'm easy going and friendly and open minded. So everyone thinks they are right, and that everyone else who says the contrary, is lying about me. I hate it when people do that. It confuses the heck out of you.

A lot of people like to undermine my confidence and they insist that everyone agrees with them and that everyone who says otherwise is not being honest with me. Everyone makes that fallacy where they argue that their opinion of me represents everyone else's. It's really weird. I don't understand why people do that.

Some people, such as older women, have a habit of seeing faults that aren't there too.

How would you like it if I made a weird or false statement about your personality and I insisted that everyone who told you otherwise was lying to you and not being honest? Wouldn't that be weird? Why do people do that? Even my parents have done that sometimes. My parents claim that all my ex girlfriends broke up with me because I'm not a nice person. Yet in reality, I've never lost a single relationship by being mean or not nice. But still, they keep saying that. It's really weird.

[Winston]

Jackal,
Thanks, but one error you made. This forum is not centered around me. 99 percent of the 8000 threads and topics are not about me. I may ask questions about myself and other things from time to time. But most of the threads here have nothing to do with me. So this forum doesn't exactly center around me. There are thousands of topics that have nothing to do with me and that I don't even participate in.

[Jester]

I also believe that I know myself and my strengths and weaknesses. But there are some out there, esp women, who tell me that I don't, and that they see flaws in me that I don't notice.

Women do that. A philosopher/saint/ladies-man I met, once told me, that women are angels. All women. I asked, "Even prostitutes?!" Yes, he said. "Why?", I asked. "Because they show us our flaws", he replied.

"My parents claim that all my ex girlfriends broke up with me because I'm not a nice person. Yet in reality, I've never lost a single relationship by being mean or not nice. But still, they keep saying that. It's really weird.

Part of me wants to say that your parents are liars.

But it is probably more accurate to say that they are probably not saying what they mean. People - especially women - use the word "nice" to mean any positive quality.

[OutsideoftheBox]

Or does calling someone a "dumb ass", "spineless wimp", etc. not qualify as a personal attack?

[indigoheart]

Serious question.

Why do many consider me dysfunctional and wacko? Why do many people like to claim that there's something wrong with me?

If I do something wrong, and people like to criticize me and find fault, doesn't that mean that they are the one with the issues?

I mean look at how I am: I am friendly, open, easy going, honest, sincere, down to earth, polite, logical, rational. I don't BS anyone or give false information. The stuff I say is honest, truthful and accurate. I don't criticize unless its called for.

What more could you ask for?

What could be so bad about me?

What are my major personality defects that are not subjective?

Can anyone explain this logically?

Why are there so many judgmental people? Everyone who criticizes me seems to think that everyone else who says the opposite are lying. Why is that? Why can't they accept that the many positive compliments I receive are honestly given?

Don't you hate it when people point out faults in yourself that you don't see or that are not supported by any evidence? Could it be that people who criticize others, esp those who did nothing wrong, are the ones with the problem? After all, what kind of person likes to bring another down? What kind of person bashes another's appearance or personality of one who is friendly and polite? It doesn't make sense. Confident people don't do that. Aren't the people who bash me lacking in confidence and taking their own inner issues out on me?

Could it be that I am the sane one and everyone else is insane, and so the insane all see me as the insane one?

I haven't done anything wrong, so aren't those who bash me insane or irrational?

I mean, sure I am too crazy about girls and a bit narcissistic and maybe egotistical. But so what? Almost every guy is like that. How does that make me bad or any worse than others? As long as I am sincere, honest, polite, friendly, what does it matter?

Is it because I am not settled down into a permanent routine job and stable marriage? Is that what makes me a bad person?

Is it because I want too much, beyond my "league"? What is wrong with aspiring for more? Isn't that what motivates all forms of achievement?

Can someone explain to me objectively what my true faults are and why many are disgusted by me or critical of me without logical basis? What is wrong with me? Can someone explain concretely without subjectivity?

What do I need to change about myself exactly? I am confident, follow my heart, etc. So what am I lacking? Is it my looks or personality?

Why does everyone think that their opinion of me is fact and cannot be disagreed with? It's really weird.

I hate how everyone likes to dish criticism but no one likes to take it. Everyone thinks it's ok to be rude to me but they cite it as a fault of mine if I am rude back at them? That's stupid.

Have any of you wondered about these things? Why are people everywhere always telling us that there is something wrong with us? Does that happen to you guys too? Or just to me?

Could it be that, as ancient mystics and mystery schools taught, that we are all possessed by demons or metaphysical mind parasites? If so, then perhaps they like to pick on people who are different or more conscious than others, in order to bring them down? And thus they like to possess people around me to make them criticize me to try to bring me down and make me insecure? Could that be the explanation for this nonsense and insanity? How can one do nothing wrong yet be constantly criticized and ridiculed? It doesn't add up and is not logical.

I notice that older single women, such as those over 30, tend to constantly find fault with everyone and everything, yet will never accept any criticism of themselves. Anyone notice that about them? They often see faults in others where there are none, as though they are imagining things or seeing things that aren't there. This especially seems to be true of women over 30 who are still single. They see faults in everything, even if they aren't really there. Why is that? Are they seeing something that I am missing, or are they delusional? What do you think?

Dear Winston,

I'm glad you brought this topic up. Addressing your critics in this manner is a good and healthy thing for your site and is a great way to get a snapshot reflection of who you are as a person. Actually it sparked my interest to finally join your blog so I could reply. So thank you for opening this topic up.

I can't say I know you all too very well, but note facts that we've spent time together hanging out in Angeles having fun. I've also met your parents, your gf and your kid, and one of of your close companions, ladislav. We even come from the same city back in California. So we're not super close, but I think I know you well enough that I feel comfortable to expound a little bit on what my thoughts and criticisms of you are. I won't name myself because I wish to preserve my confidentiality here in the forum and I hope you respect that too bud. But I think you know who I am by giving you these glimpse of facts.

Before I start all that, I just want to highlight that in my 4 year journey living here in the Philippines, The wisdom you shared with me in regards to dating, where the spots in Angeles, the experiences you've had in Europe are serious golden man. I never thought I would hang out at bars here, being a Filipino-American, I thought it was a dirty and f***ed up thing to exploit the red light scene. But you opened my mind to the scene in a different way. You showed me that you can find true love and happiness if you work it right. I thought it was just all about P4P out in these scenes, most of it can be if you want it to be that way. But dude, you showed me an avenue in life that for a guy with my decently high IQ and American Christian based morals, I would have probably never found on my own. And the people you hang around with, like Ladislav, have been key in influencing my thinking to have enjoy having one of the most amazing lifestyles that almost all of my friends envy back in California. Plus The stuff I learned from you in regards to how women operate here and how to work them, dude.. I couldn't get away with it all if I did that kind of shit it back in California - oh man, I would seriously be toast. I have your perspective and wisdom to seriously thank for all that.

I see you as a mind opener and as someone who has been a key and integral step in my life's journey. But like every teacher I've met in my journey, they're not perfect. I've learned to take from you what is good and discern for myself what I would rather not listen to. And there are times I am cautious to take from what you offer and post out there. You are full of rants in my opinion. You sound like a what one western asshole would consider to be a "whining bitch" sometimes. There are humorous points I find in your posts, but sometimes your own criticisms are shaded by the perversion of what I believe to your greatest desire to find happiness: using the vehicle of a woman's body as your sexual gratification. There's nothing wrong in being a male and celebrating it, but I sometimes feel in reading your rants that your perspectives sometimes are too much founded upon this desire of yours.

The story of your lack of finding true romance or what I think is actually sexual gratification in America and your journey to seek it elsewhere is nothing new, but you do theorize that American society has forced you somehow to be meek and accept a reality which you did not want. I find that the empowering and bold, but I also find it weak in the regard that its a fleshly motivation. It's the lack of what you had that's moved you and therefore there's this chip on your shoulder, so-to-speak, that you didn't get enough ass or love (whatever you want to define it as) perhaps when you were younger, so now you got to make up for it - I think this is OK to fill the gap, but I see that you've carried over the same attitude and perspective that perpetuates the very society that you intended to move away from. I wish as your friend, that you would shake off that mentality and learn to bring your heart and mind to the level of the culture which you intend to blend with. I read somewhere that says, "think what you like, but act like everyone else". I don't really see a pattern of you adhering to this "when in rome" cliche when you are in the host nation that you stay in. I'm sure you might have exceptions in certain places for whatever complicit reasons I guess..

I might observe that you are mixed up in a duality that your means of living comes from having to attract westerners like yourself over to a foreign nation so your critiques and display of your expertise are eloquently put enough for them to seek the same journey, does this sound right? I hope you're getting my message here bro. Maybe that's the cause of you acting like a dick when you need to respond to the bullshit thrown at you, but hoping make this a message about romance, logic, and harmony for a man who's been out of sync with reality because of the bullshit this f***ed up society has imposed upon him.

I think that the fact that you're not part of a system is a good thing and a good example to all people, you've inspired me to work outside the box. People who don't get this will never really life life to the fullest. Maybe you are angry with that because at some deep level you wish they could enjoy as much as you are but don't get why they're throwing hurdles of shit. It's hard to address this, but when you do, I hope you remain as calm and cool as you were just like when you introduced me to the concepts bro. f**k listening to the whinny bitches and addressing them. Be balanced and attracted a balanced crowd. Perpetuate the good in society. Stop ranting about how it wronged you and addressing the people who want to continue supporting that nonsense. And although its a great thing you moved on from a place because you were disgusted with it, your story needs to change about why you perhaps visit places because of what's really great about it. f**k dude, when you showed me the small details and hints of how to navigate and enjoy Angeles City's red light district you opened a whole new world to me. I still am loving it despite all the dirt on the street. I see it as a place I want to go back to as often as I can because of the enjoyment I found there. I hope you can write in the same manner of inspiration that I found through your perspective back then.

Winston, you got your flaws. Your message of hope for a dork/nerd like me back in California has gave me a new lease on my confidence. While I find it, I'm still thankful for your simple help even if sometimes you are a prick.

P.S. I'm sorry for flirting with your girl, man. She wanted to f**k me behind your back, but I turned her down. Btw, She is TOTALLY using you dude and she told me she was f***ing a guy on the side cause she knew about all your escapades. Sorry if I didn't tell you because I thought you actually deserved it.

P.P.S. I forgive you for flirting with my ex chick and calling me out on my bullshit. You're still a good friend to me man.


Peace

[Truthville]

Ahh Winston..........

Your BIGGEST problem IMHO is your insane need for validation. Not just from family and close friends, BUT from EVERYONE you encounter!

It seems you have this image of yourself in your mind that you keep trying to get people to acknowledge and then get whiny and angry when they don't.

I really think you need to STOP looking for external validation and just live your life!

Oh, and reconnect with your son!