"It's just a numbers game"

[GoingAwol]

This is what American guys always tell me when I try to discuss how hard it is to get girls to go on a date with a guy. Guys tell me they'll get rejected by 20,30,40,50, or 100 girls, but it all pays off when they get a girl to say yes. Apparently, they are ok with that bullcrap. I am not! I do not want to go through hundreds or thousands of soul crushing rejections to get 1 or 2 girls. The work outweighs the reward. That's why I am way past done with American women.

[jamesbond]

PUA guys say that all the time, "It's just a numbers game." Well, some of us don't have the time or the patience to approach dozens of girls and get rejected almost every time.

[Hero]

Besides, if you average $50 per date for those first 100 unsuccessful dates, then you've spent $5000 just to meet Ms. Right. Whereas in the Philippines, you'll probably win over every girl you meet with a $10 meal at Jollibee

[GoingAwol]

Besides, if you average $50 per date for those first 100 unsuccessful dates, then you've spent $5000 just to meet Ms. Right

Well,
that's assuming a guy can even get a date. It's hard just to get a girl to reply to messages on dating sites, it's hard to get numbers, and once you get their numbers its exponentially harder to get them to commit to meet up before they decide to flake. Supposing you get them to meet up, you still have the knowledge that there's atleast an 80% you wont see them again. American women have too many dang options and aren't worth the effort it takes to date them/ bed them.

[Hero]

Besides, if you average $50 per date for those first 100 unsuccessful dates, then you've spent $5000 just to meet Ms. Right

Well,
that's assuming a guy can even get a date. It's hard just to get a girl to reply to messages on dating sites, it's hard to get numbers, and once you get their numbers its exponentially harder to get them to commit to meet up before they decide to flake. Supposing you get them to meet up, you still have the knowledge that there's atleast an 80% you wont see them again. American women have too many dang options and aren't worth the effort it takes to date them/ bed them.

Good point. OK, let's re-do the math:

Let's say that you have to ask out 100 quality women before one accepts. Then, let's say that you need 100 dates with quality women before you find the right one. That's 10,000 women that you have to ask out before you meet your dream girl. So, even if you ask out a different woman each and every day, it'll take you 27 years to meet Ms. Right.

[GoingAwol]

Besides, if you average $50 per date for those first 100 unsuccessful dates, then you've spent $5000 just to meet Ms. Right

Well,
that's assuming a guy can even get a date. It's hard just to get a girl to reply to messages on dating sites, it's hard to get numbers, and once you get their numbers its exponentially harder to get them to commit to meet up before they decide to flake. Supposing you get them to meet up, you still have the knowledge that there's atleast an 80% you wont see them again. American women have too many dang options and aren't worth the effort it takes to date them/ bed them.

Good point. OK, let's re-do the math:

Let's say that you have to ask out 100 quality women before one accepts. Then, let's say that you need 100 dates with quality women before you find the right one. That's 10,000 women that you have to ask out before you meet your dream girl. So, even if you ask out a different woman each and every day, it'll take you 27 years to meet Ms. Right.

Exactly,
But, people are in denial about this.

[Adama]

I used to think dating was just a simple matter of musical chairs. That is, all you got to do is find a partner before they're all taken, and it doesn't even matter who, as long as it is a she.

Now I don't even think we get to choose our partners. They are more or less preselected, and you get to choose from the pre-selection. If you try to select a woman who isn't pre-selected for you, you get burned. Pretty simple. Just got to figure out which grouping you're in. In common parlance they used to call something like this "leagues," but I think that isn't descriptive enough for the soul-mate aspect of things. "Scientific studies" (if you buy into their mumbo jumbo) tells us that people are most attracted to people of the opposite sex who have facial structure similar enough to their own that they could be their sibling. In other words, men are attracted to the female version of themselves and women are attracted to the male version of themselves.

I wouldn't waste my time hitting on any woman unless she had sent me a signal first or she is smoking hot but never saw me. In both cases though, if I don't believe that we would be a good fit, then I might just skip her.

[GoingAwol]

I used to think dating was just a simple matter of musical chairs. That is, all you got to do is find a partner before they're all taken, and it doesn't even matter who, as long as it is a she.

Now I don't even think we get to choose our partners. They are more or less preselected, and you get to choose from the pre-selection. If you try to select a woman who isn't pre-selected for you, you get burned. Pretty simple. Just got to figure out which grouping you're in. In common parlance they used to call something like this "leagues," but I think that isn't descriptive enough for the soul-mate aspect of things. "Scientific studies" (if you buy into their mumbo jumbo) tells us that people are most attracted to people of the opposite sex who have facial structure similar enough to their own that they could be their sibling. In other words, men are attracted to the female version of themselves and women are attracted to the male version of themselves.

I wouldn't waste my time hitting on any woman unless she had sent me a signal first or she is smoking hot but never saw me. In both cases though, if I don't believe that we would be a good fit, then I might just skip her.

What universe are you living in? There are no leagues in America. Women date up without exception here.

[Cornfed]

There are also social problems with treating it like a numbers game. Because they are constantly being propositioned, females become hostile and defensive as well as developing a hugely inflated sense of self worth.

[Adama]

I used to think dating was just a simple matter of musical chairs. That is, all you got to do is find a partner before they're all taken, and it doesn't even matter who, as long as it is a she.

Now I don't even think we get to choose our partners. They are more or less preselected, and you get to choose from the pre-selection. If you try to select a woman who isn't pre-selected for you, you get burned. Pretty simple. Just got to figure out which grouping you're in. In common parlance they used to call something like this "leagues," but I think that isn't descriptive enough for the soul-mate aspect of things. "Scientific studies" (if you buy into their mumbo jumbo) tells us that people are most attracted to people of the opposite sex who have facial structure similar enough to their own that they could be their sibling. In other words, men are attracted to the female version of themselves and women are attracted to the male version of themselves.

I wouldn't waste my time hitting on any woman unless she had sent me a signal first or she is smoking hot but never saw me. In both cases though, if I don't believe that we would be a good fit, then I might just skip her.

What universe are you living in? There are no leagues in America. Women date up without exception here.

Without exception? See that's your problem of thinking of people in absolute terms. There is no without exception. Ruling out exceptions is part of the problem here. How are you going to find an exception when you're already determined that they can't exist?

A divorce rate of whatever percent tells me that at least that many are a mismatch, and those are just the ones who got married.

This is all just speculation, but what I'm saying is, there is a path and you need to discover it. What are its boundaries? What is your type and what type are you? If you discover your type, and I don't mean astrology, I think you have a much better chance of success. Just pick the women from your type once you realize what type you are.

[GoingAwol]

I used to think dating was just a simple matter of musical chairs. That is, all you got to do is find a partner before they're all taken, and it doesn't even matter who, as long as it is a she.

Now I don't even think we get to choose our partners. They are more or less preselected, and you get to choose from the pre-selection. If you try to select a woman who isn't pre-selected for you, you get burned. Pretty simple. Just got to figure out which grouping you're in. In common parlance they used to call something like this "leagues," but I think that isn't descriptive enough for the soul-mate aspect of things. "Scientific studies" (if you buy into their mumbo jumbo) tells us that people are most attracted to people of the opposite sex who have facial structure similar enough to their own that they could be their sibling. In other words, men are attracted to the female version of themselves and women are attracted to the male version of themselves.

I wouldn't waste my time hitting on any woman unless she had sent me a signal first or she is smoking hot but never saw me. In both cases though, if I don't believe that we would be a good fit, then I might just skip her.

What universe are you living in? There are no leagues in America. Women date up without exception here.

Without exception? See that's your problem of thinking of people in absolute terms. There is no without exception. Ruling out exceptions is part of the problem here. How are you going to find an exception when you're already determined that they can't exist?

A divorce rate of whatever percent tells me that at least that many are a mismatch, and those are just the ones who got married.

This is all just speculation, but what I'm saying is, there is a path and you need to discover it. What are its boundaries? What is your type and what type are you? If you discover your type, and I don't mean astrology, I think you have a much better chance of success. Just pick the women from your type once you realize what type you are.

Astrology is the oldest science in the world.

[GoingAwol]

There are also social problems with treating it like a numbers game. Because they are constantly being propositioned, females become hostile and defensive as well as developing a hugely inflated sense of self worth.

Well, what's the alternative in America? There aren't any

[livefreeordie]

Is 1 in 100 success rate in getting a date really very realistic?

Even I was getting maybe a number out of several approaches, but many of these flaked out. I seemed to increase my odds significantly when approaching foreign women in Australia, but still I probably only got 2 or 3 lays out of it!

Overseas im beating them off with a stick! Its so much better!

[Banano]

There are too many variables nobody is mentioning

Your age, level of attractiveness,status, her age , hotness etc

You can get 1 lay out of 5 approaches if you drop standards low enough and 45 yo fat dude can approach 1000 young hot girls and get 0 lays


1 out of 100 approaches is made up number, no player, hot guy 8+ approaches 1000 girls to get 10 lays...

The way it works is something like this, he shows up in the bar or club where he gets tons of IOIs and the rest is history, its more like 1 out of 1..Tinder and online works the same.

[GoingAwol]

There are too many variables nobody is mentioning

a 45 yo fat dude can approach 1000 young hot girls and get 0 lays

You accuse us of simplifying the issue, but you simplify it even more. You say lower your standards and you can get 1 lay in 5 approaches, BS. That is not true. Furthermore, a guy does not have to be a 45 year old fat guy to not get laid. I'm 25, tall, and decent looking and I couldn't get laid unless I strictly pursued obese landwhales. The dating scene here is fubar. Women simply date up here.