Want to do with my Filipina Girlfriend

[Panksie]

Hello everyone,

I am a little embarrassed to be posting here because of my last two posts and reactions from last year.

At the time, I was stupid and involved with scammers and sadly, I did not learn from the first one and got involved with a second one.

Well, to be honest, after I arrived to the Philippines, I saw through the web lies of the second scammer, despite it costing some more money and ended up talking to one last scammer in Philippines.

It was kinda easy for me to fall for this lie because it was completely different and I was only in Philippines for 1 day with no understanding of anything.

The lie was that she wanted 5,000 pesos to come from Pampanga to Pasay, Manila to meet me.

I was a little skeptical at first and had her take a picture of her holding a sign to prove she is real. She did do that and I send the money only to see that she was a scammer too.

Ok, this may seem off topic, but, you will see how this adds to the topic.

Anyways, long story short, about 6 months ago, while I was talking to the first scammer, who went by the name Sherly Yap, a friend named Homer was trying to tell me that Sherly is a scammer due to her using model photos and asking for absurd high amount of money for Filipino standards. While talking to Homer, I saw one of his sisters Rica, who I found attractive from the pictures she taken, had nice brown skin, at the time, I only saw white skinned Filipinas and did not know that most were brown, and she has a petite figure, again, I did not know that many Filipina has petite figures. So, I did have interest in her, but, when I found out she was 10 years younger than me and still a virgin, I lost interest in her.

Me being 29, I wanted a woman closer to my age, with some life experience and well, a virgin woman is a bit of a turnoff for me.

So, being in the Philippines, for 2 days, still in Pasay, Manila, near the airport and steaming with frustration, Homer contacted me to see how I was doing and when I was telling him how I do not like Pasay, so, he invited me to live in his home in Laungcupang, Lapaz, Tarlac and told me that Rica is still interested in me.

So, I am thinking that because he is in the country area, which for some odd reason they call the country area the province, and with me down to only $1,350 in bank and 5,000 pesos in pocket, I could save some money, experience the Philippines and be still become established in penny stock trading and starting an online business. However, that was blessing and and stigma for me because my money ended up being exhausted in 20 days.

Here is the shocking part that many will laugh at. Rica was not the reason my money was exhausted. Sadly, I wish I would have believed the other posts people created about Pilipino.

Let me put it this way, after a week of living there, I was aware that Homer and a few other family members was just taking advantage of me courting Rica by not making conservative choices , wanting convenience, requesting unnecessary things they would not buy themselves and the list goes on.

Look, I know many of you are aware how bad some people in Philippines can be, especially when a female in the family has become the golden egg. So,it is needless to go on about the list.

So anyways, within 3 days of being in the Philippines, I meet Rica, and she really was the woman I seen on Facebook.

Ok, this is a bit off topic but adds to Homer's character, he waited til the day I meet Rica to say she don't speak English and it was later I figured out that if I had known that any sooner, I would have never wanted to meet her. In fact, during my entire stay, Homer has withheld information until the last minute.

Upon meeting her, she was shy, but after a little breaking in and a few dates, she started showing more of herself, which I like and respect.

Throughout the time of seeing her, I could see that she was sick that she want me for love, enjoyment and support. Which, I have no problem doing for a woman as long as she is sincere and I had to cross check her intentions and her feelings for me before I was to continue a relationship with her. Furthermore, I could see that she is very cautious and influenced greatly by her family. And here is one thing that had me to evaluate if I want to stay with Rica, is that she wants to wait to give herself to me after she finishes college and comes to America. Which, the family in her house in Amucao has asked me to pay for.

Some more things, I want to point out is that she has shown me her home multiple times.

I have come to believe that her old sister Angelica has an effect on her being so cautious and why her family in the house which is in Amucao, remember that I am in Laungcupang with Homer, Angelica, Chris, Junior who is the boyfriend of Angelica and father of 2 kids with Angelica with another one on the way, because Angelica had mutliple boyfriends with 4 children from previous boyfriends, never gone to college and not married.

I also do believe that having a broken family affects Rica too as Rica lives with her mother but the Father has a different wife in Binannongan.

So, within that month of being in the Philippines, going on dates with Rica and talking to her every day, she never once gave me bullshit, and with her wanting to wait so long before she gives herself to me, I literally tried to find any bullshit from Rica. I don't even have any bad gut feelings about her like I did with my first wife, Sherly Yap who is a scammer and Michelle Velez who is also a scammer. She never once gave me excuses even though we both know she is not in perfect health.

She is very direct with me and not afraid to speak her mind, which I like and respect about her.

Another thing, I did notice about her is that she waited a while before asking what happened in my past relationship. Something both scammers and my first wife had asked about in the very beginning.

To be honest, I am still courting her because her honesty and I genuinely feel an honest down to Earth relationship with her, despite the fact she knows I am still angry at her brother for being the main culprit of so much money being exhausted.

Because of her brother, I wanted to end the relationship multiple times. But lets put it this way, she has shown to genuinely care.

Such as the time, I got tired of taking Homer with me to Tarlac City because of reasons, I think many already understand, and chose to go alone, without telling anyone. She left me 13 messages within 2 hours, which I responded much later after I had returned to Laungcupang that day.

Then in another case, I got so angry at her brother, even with no money, I tried to quickly pack up my things and leave without a word. I even tried to break up with her because once I am angry I rather just keep away from all problems. And she was texting me asking what has she done to me.

Now, I am back in America and observing how she will be while I am away.

By the way, I am not stupid and aware that our time apart will not be easy and we will both have to face many challenges.

For right now, she still contacts me frequently.

I will be as real as day here. Even though I am black and overweight, I learned that even I can easily get a new woman in the Philippines. So, it is not like I don't know there are other options for me.

So it is like this, she is a good woman. She is reasonable when it comes to asking for help and never once gives excuses or play the guilt card with me. I enjoy her company and like her as a person, but, I am not crazy in love with her. I even told Homer and Rica that when I return, I will be living in Malate, Manila and visit her when she wants me to.

Even though Rica doesn't bullshit me, if I detect bullshit, I am going to cut ties with her in a heartbeat.

But, I still have a problem with knowing if she is serious about having me wait so long to share intimacy with her and when I return, how much longer will it have to be before we go on dates alone as I don't want to pay for her chaperones anymore.

However, when I return to Philippines, even though it is a bit wrong, I was thinking about having a casual girlfriend in Malate who will be my tour guide, give comfort and cook for me.

Ok, this was a long post, I am going to expect some whiplash because everyone is entitled to their opinion, but, should I keep Rica and see how our relationship develops while we are apart in America?

If things really go well while apart, when I do return, should I give more time to see where the relationship goes?

Although, I do feel a bit wronged with thinking of having a casual girlfriend on the side, should I do that so that it will resolve some of the frustrations?

[Zambales]

Yeah, it only costs around P200 from Pampanga to Pasay (on the bus). My ex was from San Fernando in Pampanga so I've done this route enough times.

From my viewpoint, having an ex who had family who saw me as an ATM machine (not at first but two years down the line), I would steer clear. This Rica might be genuine herself but the family plays a big part in your relationship with a Pinay, and if they've already pinpointed you as their financial saviour, I think you're going to have problems which could cause friction between the two of you.

[Panksie]

Wow, and it kinda sucks that I will most likely end up breaking her heart as I did also want to get to know her more.

I am aware that family is a huge factor and without me reading everything again, I do believe that I have stated in some way that the family has caused much frustrated.

Before I even came here seeking advice, I have spoke to many men in Philippines, many were native and others were foreigners.

Many of the Filipino men felt this it was messed up what happened, some even told me I needed to leave the house as soon as possible. At the time, I had no money and did not know the embassy could help me.

One who is now a good friend of mine, whose name is Jany, even told me that Rica can be a good woman, but, can she offer protection from family?

Sadly, Jany's girlfriend even said, to break up with her and find a woman closer to my age.

Other foreigners who have dealt with similar situations, left the woman before things got out of control.

Really, anyone can see that logically, the cards are stacked against Rica, but, I am going to wait and see what other responses I may get.

[Zambales]

One who is now a good friend of mine, whose name is Jany, even told me that Rica can be a good woman, but, can she offer protection from family?

Well, if she can stand up to her family....then maybe there's hope, but you need to get the issue aired out promptly before you get emotionally involved.

Personally, I'd walk away, but it's your call.