Decoding Filipina online dating lingo

[firahs75]

For the past month or so, I have also been having a daily video chat with a cute 19 yo college student from Mindanao. She has agreed to take off from school and meet with me for a few days. As I stated before, I am not looking just for notches, but for a partner, so my only reservation is her age.

I am very, very skeptical of women in general but so far she has passed all the tests--she has never once even hinted at anything related to money and didn't bat an eye when I said that I wanted to live permanently in Phil and not the USA (she just asked if we could visit the US so she could meet my family). She always seems genuinely happy to see me and she messages me like clockwork in the morning and evening (unless she doesn't have load) so that we can video chat. Now it has been a little over one month and she says she loves me. Not sure if you can really fall in love with someone you've only seen online, so I am still a very, very long way from trusting her completely.

Is it really possible that a cute 19 yo filipina could really be genuinely in love with a 40 year old guy (I'm in pretty decent shape) and would actually be loyal? As you know this would never happen in the USA.

[Rock]

For the past month or so, I have also been having a daily video chat with a cute 19 yo college student from Mindanao. She has agreed to take off from school and meet with me for a few days. As I stated before, I am not looking just for notches, but for a partner, so my only reservation is her age.

I am very, very skeptical of women in general but so far she has passed all the tests--she has never once even hinted at anything related to money and didn't bat an eye when I said that I wanted to live permanently in Phil and not the USA (she just asked if we could visit the US so she could meet my family). She always seems genuinely happy to see me and she messages me like clockwork in the morning and evening (unless she doesn't have load) so that we can video chat. Now it has been a little over one month and she says she loves me. Not sure if you can really fall in love with someone you've only seen online, so I am still a very, very long way from trusting her completely.

Is it really possible that a cute 19 yo filipina could really be genuinely in love with a 40 year old guy (I'm in pretty decent shape) and would actually be loyal? As you know this would never happen in the USA.

Sure, very possible As for trusting her completely, well she's only human. Don't ever trust anyone completely. In fact, I don't even trust myself all the time lol.

Some young Filipinas who are mature way beyond their years (ready to settle down) and who would make great wives and mothers still may hedge their bets by entertaining more than one guy (several lines in the water) until she gets a solid commitment from one of them. So don't expect much yet. But it sounds like from what you write, she very well may be putting all her focus on you at this time.

So get over to see her as soon as you can to figure it out. Great luck.

[Zambales]

Age difference and looks isn't top priority for most Pinays. Being a good faithful husband is and while they don't mind settling down early they still can be very immature (as in childish).

I'm around the same age as you Firahs, and I wouldn't want a woman who is young enough to my daughter but that's just my preference. Also, whereabouts in Mindanao is she? If it's in the west, I wouldn't bother, as travelling to that part can be risky.

At the end of the day there are around 100 million people in the Philippines so how many single women aged 25-35 would there be for example? Loads!
The key here is not to rush into anything and take your time choosing. You are more likely to find your ideal woman this way.

[firahs75]

Age difference and looks isn't top priority for most Pinays. Being a good faithful husband is and while they don't mind settling down early they still can be very immature (as in childish).

I'm around the same age as you Firahs, and I wouldn't want a woman who is young enough to my daughter but that's just my preference. Also, whereabouts in Mindanao is she? If it's in the west, I wouldn't bother, as travelling to that part can be risky.

At the end of the day there are around 100 million people in the Philippines so how many single women aged 25-35 would there be for example? Loads!
The key here is not to rush into anything and take your time choosing. You are more likely to find your ideal woman this way.

She lives in Butuan which seems to be pretty safe. I was thinking of meeting her there and then spending our time elsewhere like Camiguin or Boracay. Ordinarily I would not consider a girl so young, but she has a very mature attidtude and so far she has passed all of the basic tests. We'll see how it goes...

[Zambales]

Age difference and looks isn't top priority for most Pinays. Being a good faithful husband is and while they don't mind settling down early they still can be very immature (as in childish).

I'm around the same age as you Firahs, and I wouldn't want a woman who is young enough to my daughter but that's just my preference. Also, whereabouts in Mindanao is she? If it's in the west, I wouldn't bother, as travelling to that part can be risky.

At the end of the day there are around 100 million people in the Philippines so how many single women aged 25-35 would there be for example? Loads!
The key here is not to rush into anything and take your time choosing. You are more likely to find your ideal woman this way.

She lives in Butuan which seems to be pretty safe. I was thinking of meeting her there and then spending our time elsewhere like Camiguin or Boracay. Ordinarily I would not consider a girl so young, but she has a very mature attidtude and so far she has passed all of the basic tests. We'll see how it goes...

Butuan should be fine.

There are flights to Camiguin and Butuan from Cebu and a ferry to Camiguin from Cebu. If you decide to do both Camiguin and Butuan, go via Balingoan in Mindanao. It has a port which connects Camiguin and is on the road to Butuan thus saving a lot of time by missing out Cagayan de Oro.

[Jonny Law]

Age difference and looks isn't top priority for most Pinays. Being a good faithful husband is and while they don't mind settling down early they still can be very immature (as in childish).

I'm around the same age as you Firahs, and I wouldn't want a woman who is young enough to my daughter but that's just my preference. Also, whereabouts in Mindanao is she? If it's in the west, I wouldn't bother, as travelling to that part can be risky.

At the end of the day there are around 100 million people in the Philippines so how many single women aged 25-35 would there be for example? Loads!
The key here is not to rush into anything and take your time choosing. You are more likely to find your ideal woman this way.

She lives in Butuan which seems to be pretty safe. I was thinking of meeting her there and then spending our time elsewhere like Camiguin or Boracay. Ordinarily I would not consider a girl so young, but she has a very mature attidtude and so far she has passed all of the basic tests. We'll see how it goes...

Butuan should be fine.

There are flights to Camiguin and Butuan from Cebu and a ferry to Camiguin from Cebu. If you decide to do both Camiguin and Butuan, go via Balingoan in Mindanao. It has a port which connects Camiguin and is on the road to Butuan thus saving a lot of time by missing out Cagayan de Oro.

I was in Butuan and visited my girlfriend Hazel.

I recommend GO Hotel. It is the best Hotel in town and new. Rooms are around $20 a night.

Red Palms Suites is also a nice hotel.

Cheapest way is to buy a flight from Manila or Cebu. Flights will cost about $150. Philippines Airlines has good deals.

http://www.philippineairlines.com/

[firahs75]

Thanks for the advice guys, I truly appreciate it!

Johnny, does GO hotel have good internet?

[pete98146]

Is it really possible that a cute 19 yo filipina could really be genuinely in love with a 40 year old guy (I'm in pretty decent shape) and would actually be loyal? As you know this would never happen in the USA.

Yes! When I first started talking to my wife (filipina from Iligan City) she was 21 years old and I was 40. Just take your time and get to know her very well before committing to marriage. Hope it works out well for you!!

[mentor]

'Live my/your life to the fullest'.
What does this means?

[firahs75]

I'm guessing it means travelling, going out to movies, eating, and drinking etc all on your dime....nothing wrong with that per say...I am willing to provide that in exchange for 100% unwavering devotion and loyalty....

[pete98146]

I'm guessing it means travelling, going out to movies, eating, and drinking etc on all your dime....nothing wrong with that per say...I am willing to provide that in exchange for 100% unwavering devotion and loyalty....

No! Not necessarily the case at all. When I first visited my wife, she had a nice office/sales job in Cebu. She insisted that she pay for a few meals and I let her pay That was her way of letting me know that she wasn't a freeloader just waiting around for a two legged ATM machine.

I really appreciated her offer. Sure I ended up paying 80% of everything but she did put up a fight to pay more than she did. But this train of thought continues now that we are married. My wife has a good job. All expenses sent back to her family are paid by her.

I will preach to this forum until I'm blue in the face but it's extremely important to make sure that the girl that you marry is an ASSET to your family and not a LIABILITY. What do I mean by this? There are thousands upon thousands of ladies in the Philippines who fall asleep every night dreaming of meeting a nice foreign man.

There are a lot of Negative Nancy's on this forum. Truth be told is that meeting a Filipina is easy...kind of like fishing with dynamite. The prudent man will take his time, do his research and strive to find the higher caliber lady preferably with a bit of education and smarts. So if you do opt to bring her back to your home country you don't want her sitting around the house watching Eat Bulaga and snacking on bon bons all day. Get a girl that can go get a good job and contribute!!!!

Really, it's not all the difficult to do.

[firahs75]

delete

[firahs75]

I'm guessing it means travelling, going out to movies, eating, and drinking etc on all your dime....nothing wrong with that per say...I am willing to provide that in exchange for 100% unwavering devotion and loyalty....

No! Not necessarily the case at all. When I first visited my wife, she had a nice office/sales job in Cebu. She insisted that she pay for a few meals and I let her pay That was her way of letting me know that she wasn't a freeloader just waiting around for a two legged ATM machine.

I really appreciated her offer. Sure I ended up paying 80% of everything but she did put up a fight to pay more than she did. But this train of thought continues now that we are married. My wife has a good job. All expenses sent back to her family are paid by her.

I will preach to this forum until I'm blue in the face but it's extremely important to make sure that the girl that you marry is an ASSET to your family and not a LIABILITY. What do I mean by this? There are thousands upon thousands of ladies in the Philippines who fall asleep every night dreaming of meeting a nice foreign man.

There are a lot of Negative Nancy's on this forum. Truth be told is that meeting a Filipina is easy...kind of like fishing with dynamite. The prudent man will take his time, do his research and strive to find the higher caliber lady preferably with a bit of education and smarts. So if you do opt to bring her back to your home country you don't want her sitting around the house watching Eat Bulaga and snacking on bon bons all day. Get a girl that can go get a good job and contribute!!!!

Really, it's not all the difficult to do.

Ugghh...the idea of bringing another woman to this country chills me to the bone (see my brief post about my first marriage in the following thread at the end of the page: viewtopic.php?f=48&t=24853&start=45)

This 19 yo woman i am talking with seems like she would be a great asset...she is a college student in Mindanao studying elementary education and works for a rich family....she does everything for them from the accounting, to the childcare, to the yard work, to the cooking (and according to her boss she is a fantastic cook).

Such a woman would be a tremendous asset to any family. But my spidey sense tells me not to trust her...We have only known each other via skype video chats, so how can the love she professes be true?

I did not bring up the subject at all, but at first she told me that she would only sleep with me if I married her (she is not a virgin so ROTFLMAO)....i told her that was not going to happen....I once made the mistake of waiting until marriage with a girl from church, as I was stupidly trying to follow biblical principles in choosing a woman (it was my second marriage; the sex SUCKED!!!--missionary only, no BJ's). I will never do that again under any circumstances. I still have faith in God and all but I guess He just wanted to play a cruel joke on me there.

Anyways, now after one month she has kind of changed her tune and has subtly acquiesced to sleeping with me during my visit. She has sought assurance that i will not leave her if we sleep together. Apparently she has only been with one guy and he took her virginity and dumped her immediately after--leaving her heartbroken and traumatized (rolleyes; maybe its true). So she also sought assurance that if she gets pregnant i will take care of the child....i dunno...seems kinda weird?!?!?!?

But when you are 40 it is kinda hard to resist 19 y.o. poon. Don't wanna be a dick and just pump and dump, but I would love it if I could really trust her as I am far past the point of just wanting sex for sex's sake....she just seems a bit too eager to be in a relationship with me...something seems kinda off, but only slightly...at 19 years of age, can she really be that much of an expert in western male manipulation? The other girls I have met that were straight up gold diggers have been remarkably crude or stupid in their approach; laughably so.

[pete98146]

I'm guessing it means travelling, going out to movies, eating, and drinking etc on all your dime....nothing wrong with that per say...I am willing to provide that in exchange for 100% unwavering devotion and loyalty....

No! Not necessarily the case at all. When I first visited my wife, she had a nice office/sales job in Cebu. She insisted that she pay for a few meals and I let her pay That was her way of letting me know that she wasn't a freeloader just waiting around for a two legged ATM machine.

I really appreciated her offer. Sure I ended up paying 80% of everything but she did put up a fight to pay more than she did. But this train of thought continues now that we are married. My wife has a good job. All expenses sent back to her family are paid by her.

I will preach to this forum until I'm blue in the face but it's extremely important to make sure that the girl that you marry is an ASSET to your family and not a LIABILITY. What do I mean by this? There are thousands upon thousands of ladies in the Philippines who fall asleep every night dreaming of meeting a nice foreign man.

There are a lot of Negative Nancy's on this forum. Truth be told is that meeting a Filipina is easy...kind of like fishing with dynamite. The prudent man will take his time, do his research and strive to find the higher caliber lady preferably with a bit of education and smarts. So if you do opt to bring her back to your home country you don't want her sitting around the house watching Eat Bulaga and snacking on bon bons all day. Get a girl that can go get a good job and contribute!!!!

Really, it's not all the difficult to do.

Ugghh...the idea of bringing another woman to this country chills me to the bone (see my brief post about my first marriage in the following thread at the end of the page: viewtopic.php?f=48&t=24853&start=45)

This 19 yo woman i am talking with seems like she would be a great asset...she is a college student in Mindanao studying elementary education and works for a rich family....she does everything for them from the accounting, to the childcare, to the yard work, to the cooking (and according to her boss she is a fantastic cook).

Such a woman would be a tremendous asset to any family. But my spidey sense tells me not to trust her...We have only known each other via skype video chats, so how can the love she professes be true?

I did not bring up the subject at all, but at first she told me that she would only sleep with me if I married her (she is not a virgin so ROTFLMAO)....i told her that was not going to happen....I once made the mistake of waiting until marriage with a girl from church, as I was stupidly trying to follow biblical principles in choosing a woman (it was my second marriage; the sex SUCKED!!!--missionary only, no BJ's). I will never do that again under any circumstances. I still have faith in God and all but I guess He just wanted to play a cruel joke on me there.

Anyways, now after one month she has kind of changed her tune and has subtly acquiesced to sleeping with me during my visit. She has sought assurance that i will not leave her if we sleep together. Apparently she has only been with one guy and he took her virginity and dumped her immediately after--leaving her heartbroken and traumatized (rolleyes; maybe its true). So she also sought assurance that if she gets pregnant i will take care of the child....i dunno...seems kinda weird?!?!?!?

But when you are 40 it is kinda hard to resist 19 y.o. poon. Don't wanna be a dick and just pump and dump, but I would love it if I could really trust her as I am far past the point of just wanting sex for sex's sake....she just seems a bit too eager to be in a relationship with me...something seems kinda off, but only slightly...at 19 years of age, can she really be that much of an expert in western male manipulation? The other girls I have met that were straight up gold diggers have been remarkably crude or stupid in their approach; laughably so.

Pardon me for sounding like a prude but I would put the sex on the back burner and focus on bigger issues like are you compatible. Gotta trust me on this one. If you marry a filipina and she's happy, there is virtually no way you won't be sexually satisfied. Consider it a given. I can almost guarantee she'll have you shopping at the vitamin store to keep up with her in the bedroom.

Other advice. Test her loyalty to you. Tell her it will take a year (and it should) for her to prove herself to you. During that year does you guys cam chat a few times a week? Is she reliable? Do you get the sense that she loves you and is excited to talk to you every chat session? Remove the sex and the short term variables out of the equation and see how she responds. Remember there are thousands of single filipinas available to you. Onus is on her to show STABILITY and maturity.

I did this with my wife for almost 2 years. I did visit her 3 times during those 2 years. My wife was a virgin when we married so you are right, it's not easy to lay off a stunning looking young woman but I did because I knew that in the long term it would pay off and it has.

If you really need sex (totally understand), make a pitstop to Angeles or fly thru Bangkok and spend a few days there before meeting your girl.

[Zambales]

Good advice Pete!

Firahs, like Pete said, sex isn't the main priority here but if you wanted to have an idea if she was willing it would have been better to be more subtle so she didn't feel uncomfortable.

"I'm thinking of going to Camiguin Island, would you like to join me? I'll book a hotel for us" Something along those lines. Anything else than a negative response would be likely to be a good sign.

But, yeah, finding out whether she's going to screw you over is the main objective. The worst thing you can do though, is to fall for her before you find out she's genuine. If that happens and she is a scammer, she's got you by the balls, basically.

As for the girl in question. Does she love you? Hmmm....I dunno. All I'm saying is that Filipina's are not like Western Woman. They do tend to let their heart rule their heads and get over excited and carried away quickly. For your own sake, be very cautious. She has to prove herself for you to put that ring on her finger so don't buy her and don't elevate yourself by buying gifts, sending money etc and helping out her family. She has to want you for who you are, not what you can offer financially.