I gave away Chucky the Pit Bull a while back, cause where I live (no fence), I just couldnt contain him. (I refused to cut off his gonads.)
Without him it got lonely fast.
Even if I am on the beach, I gots to have human company. I am tired of working alone, exercising alone, etc. Retirees here are bad influences, just want to drink and socialize and complain. Won't work out together or chase young women. Mexicans are nice for church and a few things, but there is no future except giving them money or marrying some single mom. I can hit on the young ones, they are nice, no bitch shield, but it aint going anywhere.
Other things that need to change:
-- I need BREAKFAST.
-- I need street food that has some VARIETY.
-- I need restaurants that are not open in the EVENING, you know... when I EAT.
-- I need Western food that is not priced at a premium.
-- I need to be around people who are COMPETENT and have GOALS and speak ENGLISH. I can flirt and tell jokes in Spanish, but I am damned if I am going to explain tech problems to a non-English speaker. Mexico DOES have these people, but they are not plentifully available. They already have good jobs.
-- If I do end up working at home rather than a co-working, then I need some TV channels in English.
Things I want to stay exactly the same as I have here:
-- I want a place that is more or less crime-free like here. Don't want to worry about getting jumped while walking on the street or at the ATM.
-- I want to be around honest, kind people like here. People who have hearts. Not with abrasive New Yorker types.
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Things I am giving up:
-- So I am giving up the best writer's cottage that ever existed in the history of the galaxy. Ah well.
-- I am also, for now, giving up the dream of picking up another passport. Easy-peasy in Mexico.
-- And giving up my trusty steed, the 1998 Jeep Grand Cherokee.
-- And I am giving up on my dream (every expat's dream?) of blending in with the locals. Just cause an animal in nature can CO-EXIST with another species doesn't mean it can BECOME that species.
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So how to get some human company? Any alternative to hiring a goldigger or two?
Well, in Asia they have "co-working spaces", you pay 100 to 500 usd per month and then you have an office around other people. I decided to choose a city that had these but great health and fitness stuff, all compact and close to good food, coffeehouses, etc.
I looked for
-- co-working space where people speak English and like Whites
-- an expat community that either is married to or is chasing much-younger women, or otherwise shows signs of life, and is doing SOMETHING other than eat and drink and monger.
-- some form of outdoor exercise
-- Chi Gung and/or Tai Chi
-- a gym
-- Pranic Energy Meditation or Reiki or the equivalent
-- Chinese Medicine
-- very affordable, excellent massage
-- street food with convenience and variety
-- BREAKFAST (not a goddam roll)
I didn't require a swimmable beach like I have here, because most Asian beaches you keep hearing about jellyfish. I have swum with dolphins and pelicans here, but do not want to sit on the sand looking at a pretty ocean that I can't swim in.
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So I did some research. (These are not trip notes, these are conjectures.) In order of rank:
Chiang Mai - Old City is compact and bicyclable; has groups and/or classes in Tai Chi and Chi Gung; Acupuncture; coffeehouses; great food; world class co-working touted by digital nomads; cheap prices; decent internet. Co-working is full of ambitious young English-speakers. (Costs about 125usd a month). Thais in the South of Thailand are tired of White louts and sex tourists, but Chiang Mai is still friendly on the surface. Lots of yoga junkies, arty types and trekkers come here. If the locals really like me deep down or not I don't care, the point is that the entire place is set up to deliver the perks that my Privileged White Ass (PWA) requires. Lots of fitness and health options, from trails and biking to "Hash House Harriers" trail-running social group. Almost no real gyms though. Not as miserably hot and sticky as all the larger SEA cities.
Siem Reap - second choice to Chiang Mai; bicyclable; 1 co-working space. Easy visa for year round stay. But little or no health or fitness culture, and internet is not great. Co-working space will probably be full of European NGO slackers. Streets full of hippie types dancing at Angkor Wat nearby. Probably what Chiang Mai was like in 1965. This is probably where I will do visa runs.
Kuala Lumpur - Not bicyclable at all. Has Chinese stuff, acupuncture, Pranic Energy stuff, etc. A little more expensive than Chiang Mai. Better food than anywhere except perhaps Penang. (yes food matters). Several good co-working spaces. Co-working is full of ambitious young English-speakers, mostly Malaysian Chinese. I sense that people like Whites (the three main population groups do jostle with each other.) No tourism, all business. Easy 3-month stay, leave and return, no paperwork. Good coffeehouses. They have even more martial arts dojos than ChiangMai (Malays like to fight and race cars), but they also have nice real gyms. But coffeehouses, gyms, co-working and guest-houses are all in totally separate neighborhoods. Ridiculously spread out. I am simply not going to travel 40 minutes between workplace and gym etc. Otherwise it would be my first choice. If I find I have extra money I will do visa runs here instead of Siem Reap, see what its like.
Penang (Georgetown) - They do have the Pranic and Chinese stuff. Tourist areas are bicyclable but they are not near anything except food and guest houses. Huge island, long motorbike rides to get to different things. Beaches are not great. Better food than anywhere except perhaps Kuala Lumpur. Easy 3-month stay, leave and return, no paperwork. But - no co-working spaces at all. More of a vacation environment, lots of Brit couples and Asian I suspect (not sure from where). If it had co-working it would pop up to 2nd place.
Saigon - I always wanted to see it as a teen
Hate Americans, crooked, pushy; hard to find a place to stay. And little English. BUT, they have great coworking spaces, maybe 200 usd a month. Intelligent, ambitious people, headed to be the next Japan. But being both ex-Commie AND hating Americans, it will be hard to make friends or find business teammates to collaborate with. Not bicyclable. Cutthroat traffic. I love "feu", but apparently Vietnam suffers from same food issue as Mexico -- only just a few dishes are sold. There isnt a lot of choice. I like Mexican food, but you get tired of the same four things after a few weeks. If the people were friendlier this could be my first choice, just for the vibe.Davao -- Friendly, safe, great place to date etc but that's not the priority. Food is bad. Ridiculously spread out, coastal city. Not bicyclable. They do have Pranic, and affordable massage. Nice people, love Americans. The co-working space is more about teams of virtual assisteants or customer ervice reps, rather than writers designers and entrepreneurs. Might be good for dating, but not inspiring my best work. Too sleepy for me right now, not stimulating enough.
Manila -- All the Pranic and Chinese stuff is there. Big city, has nice areas but little cost advantage. Massage is cheap. Overall just not cheap enough or compact enough.
Singapore - perfect food scene, great freedom, English-language, all the stuff I need within walking distance - gym, co-work, everything. But all priced too high. Co-working space is $500usd a month for example. Not a place to save money while rebuilding. Also major visa issues. And women are spoiled, or unappealing nannies.
Hong Kong - perfect food scene, great freedom, ... but big visa problems like Singapore or worse. They dont want my kind in this town. Also expensive. Didn't really research it.
Tokyo - Where they invented Shiatsu. Interesting food, though hopelessly priced. Tempting. But apart from the cost, it's impossible to get around. Noone speaks English. Too hard. I am looking for easy, not hard.
So that's it. Mexico is over for now. Ditching my stuff, or storing it with a trusted friend who hopes to entice me to return one day. I'm off to Chiang Mai to get fit and rich. Then we'll see what comes next.
