China is much much worse than America in terms of dating.

The Professor · Post by **The Professor** » March 22nd, 2013, 9:22 am

I've been in China for a little under a year. I couldn't get women in America, and I can't get women here, making China, more or less the status quo for me personally, but the average guy will have it worse in China in terms of dating than they would in America or whatever western country they come from. A lot of guys who were actually able to get a woman in the United States find themselves unable to find a woman here, or at least a woman who is interested in something besides his money.

First I would like to link to a great article about chinese women:

http://chinese-culture-symbols.com/dati ... ese-women/

Many Chinese girls seem to imagine in fact, that to be taken out by a male and have dinner and a movie paid for without any chance of a potential relationship, is their God given birth right. Apparently (and this comes from the horses mouth) what they are giving is the pleasure of their scintillating company, and the grace of their presence, not to mention giving him good â€˜faceâ€™!

Personally, I can do without â€˜faceâ€™, and could do with a bit more of â€˜the otherâ€™, if you catch my drift. In Chinese Karaoke bars, KTV, you can pay for a girl to sit beside you and â€˜entertainâ€™ you. Now, Iâ€™m not alluding to anything sexual here when I say â€˜entertainâ€™, I mean they apparently entertain you by merely sitting there and sometimes making conversation and perhaps singing a song if you ask them to.

I once tried it out of curiosity with a group of friends. The girls were brought into the room and you pick one, pay money and she plops herself down beside you. I felt so uncomfortable and actually bored (she was no conversationalist, in Chinese or English), that I ended up â€˜entertainingâ€™ her! I paid for the privilege of entertaining herâ€¦ somethings not quite right with that picture now is there?

Let's think about this for a minute. There are women at KTVs who charge money for simply sitting down next to you and talking to you. There are a ton of KTVs here in China, I pass two just on my way to work, and each KTV has a bunch of women who charge for this "service". Since there are so many KTVs, each with a bunch of these women, that means a significant number of VERY desperate lonely men utilizing this "service". That alone should give you a hint as to how much power Chinese women have over men. I have 2 chinese friends who admit to having utilized this service and they both pretty much admitted that they did it just to enjoy a brief moment of female companionship.

Chinese women are far more picky than american women. Even the least attractive women in this country have standards that many men could never live up to and end up dating guys who are both much more physically attractive than themselves as well as of a higher socioeconomic status than themselves.

Another thing is Chinese men are expected to shave their faces, both by women and society as a whole, but chinese women are not expected to shave anything, and most don't.

Things are so bad that a lot of chinese men prefer western women. Here is another great article wrt chinese women:

http://www.ministryoftofu.com/2010/11/m ... e-popular/

Personally, I find western women generally more friendly than chinese women. If you don't like western women, you'd really hate Chinese women. I can't think of a single nice thing to say about Chinese women.

I'm here in China just for work though, Chinese women don't want me and I fully expected this. I'm simply an indifferent observer reporting what I see.

royaldude · Post by **royaldude** » March 22nd, 2013, 10:44 am

what do you look like? how old are you? I say this because I started an account on Chineselovelinks for free just to test the waters to see what the girl situation would be if I moved there. I get responses every day of girls wanting to date me and I mention that in my profile I dont live there. I really doubt China is as easy to date as the philippines for older men but to say its harder to date there than America?

Intolerant · Post by **Intolerant** » March 22nd, 2013, 3:19 pm

In all honesty, how am I convinced that Chinese women aren't damaged goods who have had multiple abortions? There are 13 million abortions a year in China. Women in China are too loose and many of whom are not marriage material.

green1976 · Post by **green1976** » March 22nd, 2013, 4:10 pm

Yes some of those guys who boast about their Chinese conquests forget to tell their conquests is in a KTV or a dirty poor peasant who will absolutely need a walking ATM.

What about Chinese men who are left over,because of gender imbalance and Chinese ladies being picky,so they go to Vietnam to take a bride.

Tell me Chinese women overseas are not Chinese women at home.
Why not,i will be ready to believe this to some extent but not totally.

I've knew here women who where from Latin America and none of them where as stucked up and cold like the Chinese women abroad.
I've remarked many Asian and Chinese women in western countries are quit soulness,money grabbing only.
It's all about social status and nothing spontaneous inside them.

green1976 · Post by **green1976** » March 22nd, 2013, 4:18 pm

royaldude wrote:what do you look like? how old are you? I say this because I started an account on Chineselovelinks for free just to test the waters to see what the girl situation would be if I moved there. I get responses every day of girls wanting to date me and I mention that in my profile I dont live there. I really doubt China is as easy to date as the philippines for older men but to say its harder to date there than America?

What you imply by wanting to date you?
What they say and does they contact you first?
I'm curious as i know a girl who is on Thai friendly and she is quit ugly to be honest but she got in the last months more than one hundred of men from around the world who made her their favorite.
So if a woman like her who is not pretty at all get so much attention,what it can be for a stunner giving sexy pose?

Can you imagine the repetion of the scenario where Western dating website are transposed to Asian website?
It's getting here.

I wouldn't say China to be worst compared to America for an average American men.
It's just the differences finally are not so huge and i repeat why to move on the other part of the planet for women if that doesn' t change radically things?

End up guys being desabused and wanting to come back home with less money and bitter.

momopi · Post by **momopi** » March 22nd, 2013, 4:22 pm

Taco · Post by **Taco** » March 22nd, 2013, 4:25 pm

Southern China is the easiest place to find a Chinese girlfriend. The city of Nanning was a hot spot for many years with expats looking for love. First tier cities(Beijing, Shanghai etc...) are the worst places to look for a Chinese girlfriend, although a few guys seem to do well here. You should try meeting some online that's my recommendation.

Also, KTV girls are hookers as well the chick who washes your hair before you get it cut at hair salon.

xiongmao · Post by **xiongmao** » March 22nd, 2013, 6:10 pm

None of the girls I've dated have been poor or KTV girls.

Any Western man can do OK here but don't come here expecting it to be like the Phillies or Thailand. For a start there's the language barrier, then the fact that the majority of Chinese women speak no English, have never even spoken to a foreigner and have no idea that they could actually find a foreign husband.

Older guys can do well here. There are some awesome women in the 35-40 age bracket who are too old for me because I'd quite like kids but they would be ideal for a guy in his 50's.

Guys under 40 also stand a good chance of finding a girl in her 20's.

Chinese women don't like poor men, well that's obvious. There's very little social security here. Plus Chinese society is all about money and status, and always has been.

On the abortion thing, well that's nonsense really. Yeah, we do actually have condoms and things here. Most of the women I've dated have still been virgins.

Some women here shave their legs, most don't need to. A lot of women don't wear makeup and stuff, so at least you get to see their natural beauty.

KTV bars, well they're mainly for married dudes and for entertaining of clients.

I've found Chinese girls to be very friendly, although they're quite shy. Once the ice is broken, they're delightful.

The only certainty is you'll be able to date a much better lady here than you could hope to date in the USA.

The Professor · Post by **The Professor** » March 22nd, 2013, 7:01 pm

royaldude wrote:what do you look like? how old are you? I say this because I started an account on Chineselovelinks for free just to test the waters to see what the girl situation would be if I moved there. I get responses every day of girls wanting to date me and I mention that in my profile I dont live there. I really doubt China is as easy to date as the philippines for older men but to say its harder to date there than America?

I'm an anglo white male in my late 20s. As you probably suspect given my lack of success in both America and China, I am below average looking. Not so far below average that I'm hideous, but far enough below average that I'm ugly. I would have no problem dating ugly women, however, even ugly women get a lot of attention all around the world.

green1976 wrote: I'm curious as i know a girl who is on Thai friendly and she is quite ugly to be honest but she got in the last months more than one hundred of men from around the world who made her their favorite.

Think about that for a moment. An ugly Thai woman got over 100 men to publicly put her as their favorite in a matter of months. This means even more than that many at least contacted her privately. With even the least attractive women around the world getting so much attention from males and having so many options, this leaves equally ugly males having absolutely no options at all or only being able to get a woman who will use him for his money.

Ugly males who want a girlfriend that wants him for any reason besides money are out of luck as they will not find this from any woman in any country. The sooner they realize this, the better.

Seeker · Post by **Seeker** » March 23rd, 2013, 11:53 pm

Prof could you say a bit more about what you've observed in your social circle regarding foreign and Chinese men?

Cornfed · Post by **Cornfed** » March 24th, 2013, 12:24 am

For most white guys in most parts of China, the thesis of this thread is bullshit. For example, my fellow teacher at the school I was at in China was a 65 year old American guy. He was apparently quite well off at one point, but his bitch ex-wife got ALL his property in the divorce settlement. All he was left with is his military pension. On the strength of that and the fact that he was in fairly good shape, notwithstanding being a short guy like me, he had a smoking hot 40 year old girlfriend. Another older teacher in the area, actually a Hungarian who spoke multiple languages, had a girlfriend in her 20s, although I suspect that was a partial p4p thing. So you often have guys dating/f***ing chicks that they would be very unlikely to get the time of day from in the West.

xiongmao · Post by **xiongmao** » March 24th, 2013, 2:53 am

Yeah, I still think you can do well here. I've dated some great girls - way better than I could hope to date back home.

It must be said though, I've seen very few Western guys here with Chinese girlfriends. So I haven't got too much to compare things to. Most male expats I've seen here are either on their own or married to a woman from their own country (especially the expats working downtown).

I've had a lot of interest from women on dating sites, but I've not had many dates lately. The bar has been lifted with Miss Xiang and the previous girl I've dated.

Being 41 is a bit of an awkward age as well. I'm a little old now to be dating the 20 somethings, and a little too young for the cream of the 35+ group.

Still, I'm here for the long haul, so I'm not rushing anything. I hope Winston puts in an appearance here at some point!

Seeker · Post by **Seeker** » March 24th, 2013, 4:27 am

Xiongmao did your "dates" ever lead to sex and/or relationships? A date by itself means almost nothing.

xiongmao · Post by **xiongmao** » March 24th, 2013, 5:26 am

Seeker wrote:Xiongmao did your "dates" ever lead to sex and/or relationships? A date by itself means almost nothing.

Yes they have. I've had 4 relationships (and a bit of sexy time). I've had maybe 3x that many dates with different women. Dating is a numbers game.

My main problem has been that up until now I've just visited China on a fortnight vacation basis, and in that time I've had to cope with gigantic jetlag and climate differences, meet a girl for the first time, decide I like her, wait around twiddling my thumbs until she has time for another date, blah blah blah.

So I kind of realised that this was no way to find a wife, hence I am now living in Asia.

If you're a guy in a hurry though, then don't come to China. It's *incredibly* hard to do anything here due to the language barrier. Well I just got back from the supermarket having not been allowed to buy an apple. Was the fruit old? Did I not buy enough? Are foreigners banned from buying fruit? Who knows - 5 weeks of intensive Mandarin lessons and I still couldn't understand a single word the checkout assistant was speaking.

Find a Chinese wife - hell yeah I can't even buy a bloody apple!!!

Rayn · Post by **Rayn** » March 24th, 2013, 6:02 am

Just my personal observations on the Chinese, based on the people here in Malaysia:

1- Most of them are very average in appearance, which just like in the US, leads to the ones who are passable in beauty to be highly contested. So expect every girl above average in appearance act especially cautious when being approached, and are poor in breaking the ice cause they are so used to having tens, if not hundreds, of men approaching them without them having to do anything. Some of them have even adopted this narcissistic habit of flirting with random men even when they are already in a relationship given how their attractiveness is such a rarity. Also expect the women to be bitchy and demanding for you to treat them like princesses for the same reason.

2- Don't expect to find any 'Rennaisance woman' types with a perfect blend of beauty and wit among the Chinese. The Chinese females are brought to be believe in the Western-influenced feminism idea that to have a great romantic life one only needs to look pretty. You will find that the females who are pretty tend to have a very crappy personality and intelligence, and vice versa. There is a growing tripe among the Chinese Malaysians and Singaporeans here that all the girls know is look like little divas but when it comes to cooking or housekeeping many of them fail.

3- The 5C mentality is very alive and well, both in Malaysia and in Singapore. They'll claw your face out in their search for the perfect men willing to break their backs to deliver them the Holy Pentality of shallow happiness. Just don't mention the 6th C to them though (Children), the irony is that many of them are eager to be a wife to a rich man, but not a mother to his children. They love going blah blah blah Malays outbreeding us and PM giving ICs to immigrants, but the real truth is compared to the other races the Chinese simply aren't as family-centered.