Why there's no real singles scene in America, only Abroad

[E Irizarry R&B Singer]

Yes, he does seem like a nice normal guy. It seems as if a lot of good men in America are having a difficult time meeting women in the USA. The guys who are jerks seem to have the easiest time meeting women in America. What does that tell you about American women?

Nah......, being a jerk is rewarded in American culture. Women preferring jerks is just a byproduct of the culture. It's that American culture is highly competitive and individualistic. This type of culture allows jerks to dominate and climb the ladder faster. This is a good Aaron Clarey video where he explains why you need to be a jerk or an asshole to win in life: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mIKzHS5okQ

The term is hybristophilia.

[jamesbond]

Title: Why there is no real singles scene in America, only Abroad, and how I became the Columbus of the Dating Abroad World

In America everything is geared toward couples and families, not singles. All around you are shops, businesses, entertainment venues, and residential neighborhoods that are designed for couples and families. Even if you go to a restaurant alone, you will be out of place, because everyone else there is not eating alone.

In America, there is this underlying assumption that if you are an adult, then you already have a partner or family, and are not looking. To "seek a woman to date" is out of flow and against the grain. You are expected to ALREADY have a partner, not to be looking for one. To be in a "seeking mode" is out of place in America. It's weird I know, but that's how it is.

Thus, if you are a single guy in America, you are essentially out of place. Sadly, there is no real "singles scene" in America outside of high school (and fictional Hollywood movies). After high school, every girl seems to be taken, even in college.

Essentially, there is nothing for a single guy to do, and nowhere to go to meet people. In a typical American town, there isn't a place where a single guy can go to meet available single girls that want to meet men. There are no friendly options to pick up girls that are natural and socially acceptable. Even in bars and clubs, people still huddle into cliques and ignore strangers. They are there to be social with people in their clique, not with strangers.

But you can't simply go out and get dates by approaching girls or trying to pick them up, because of the following major obstacles:

1) Girls in America don't talk to strangers unless it's business related. They are standoffish and paranoid toward strangers.
2) It's a taboo in America to approach girls or try to pick them up (contrary to what you see in the movies). If you attempt to, they will see you as a "creep trying to hit on them" which they view negatively.
3) The very act of asking for a date in America feels like a transgression, as though you've crossed the line and put her into a defensive position, where she has to fish for excuses to blow you off. (Unless of course, she has an obvious interest in you, but that won't happen much)
4) Flirtation is a taboo in America, seen as creepy, inappropriate and violating. You are only allowed to flirt with your wife or girlfriend in America, but not with female strangers that you fancy.
5) Even if you did meet American girls, they all think they're too good for you (and most guys). So they would blow you off and reject you anyway. As we all know, American girls are super picky, shallow and superficial, even if they don't admit it. Their actions prove this.

Winston really nailed it with what he said. The entire social scene in America is geared towards families and married couples and NOT single people. Cold approaching women is considered taboo and so most men never try it (it doesn't even work anyway). Trying to meet women at bars or clubs is an exercise in futility and online dating is probably the worst way to try and meet women in the USA. Going overseas is the only viable option for men in America.

[Lars Porsenna]

So I came across this website, & wanted to relate some of my experiences.

I'm not the target audience for this site...because I already did what this site is advocating. But I thought I'd share a bit about my story, to let people know how it worked out.

Like a lot of men in the US, I struggled with the dating scene for a long time, especially post-college. I did meet someone, but I probably settled for her, as she wasn't a great match for me. Anyway, she got pregnant (my kid) so that was that.

Fast forward 14 years later, & she ended up cheating on me. Actually she was a serial cheater. Some I suspected, but this time she was caught (by my dad, of all people!) so I ended the relationship. It was actually a good thing, since I wasn't happy, & I had the moral high ground to end things, despite the kids. Now, I could find someone better suited to me.

Like most guys, I dated within my ethnicity...I dated white women. None of these really went anywhere; a couple of short to medium term relationships, & dealt with a lot of baggage. I thought it was too late, that every woman I met would be "damaged." This wasn't fair to me, but life is rarely fair.

When I was a teen, I had always imagined whomever I would marry, would be from another country. I had always imagined a lovely Italian woman with a wonderful accent. I also had always had a romantic view of South America & Latin culture. But when I was young, I thought that was not practical, so I "settled" for local women.

So now, as a 40+ guy, not going anywhere really good in my dating life, I decided to rediscover my old dream, & date Latin women exclusively. Especially from South America. But if I wanted to do that, I should probably get around to learning Spanish.

The best way to learn a language is, after the basics, to talk to native speakers in that language. So I sought out Spanish speaking women, both in real life & on line. One day, I met someone.

She seemed perfect in every way I wanted: attractive, lovely shade of brown skin (I like my women to be a little darker than me; that is my "type."), black hair, high cheekbones, classic Latina body-shape (curvy without being fat), but at the same time not an exhibitionist that liked to show off her stuff. A more culturally conservative woman, who believed in marriage & loyalty to her husband. This was refreshing.

Over time we decided that we were good for each other. So I flew to her home country, we got married in Guayaquil. This was around 2 years ago.

That first year we did a lot of traveling, deciding where & how we would live together. Eventually I decided I would simply prefer to live in her country. So now I live in Ecuador, in the city of Manta, & I work as a TESL teacher on-line.

So let me tell you how it is going. Finding work was a bit challenging, so I recommend to anyone making this change, come up with a plan & an idea. It will make life easier. But everything else has been awesome. The relationship is strong, the culture here is less stressful, it is significantly CHEAPER than the US, so my money goes further. And I don't have to worry about her cheating on me. So for me, meeting & marrying someone abroad, & then living there, was definitely the right move, to give me the things I have been looking for in life.

One of my ex Latinas used to describe me as "Gringo Falso;" white on the outside, Latino on the inside. Right-fitting cultural expectations (I should add I am ethnically Italian, & identify most with that culture, especially southern Italy), can bring you a lot of happiness & less stress in your life. So I can testify that it was right for me to do; for others if you are thinking about it, keep in mind that sometimes in life you have to take the risk if you want to be happy.

Two phrases sum this up for me: the motto for the SAS ("Who Dares, Wins.") & the German general Heinz Guderian ("Nicht kleckern, klotzen!" or "Don't whittle, smash!"), so those are the thoughts I leave with you all.

Damon.

[have2fly]

"creep trying to hit on them"

^THIS!

It always shocked me how any American females CONSTANTLY label any men around them "creepy" for literally ANYTHING. Those men could be literally standing in line next to them looking into their phone and they would be called creepy. WTF is this garbage attitude? The only men that are not creepy to American women are the men that are completely uninterested in them or complete douchebags or thugs. Those are somehow "not creepy", but cool, hot, interesting and challenging

After American women establish a relationship with those "cool" men (cough *thugs*) they start blaming all men for being violent, immature, aggressive etc. They also start to call police and claim domestic violence. I just don't get their rotten way of thinking. Do American women have the brains at all?

[kangarunner]

This is a great article:

https://blog.happierabroad.com/2014/01/ ... women.html

Why American Women Suck - 15 Things I've Noticed

1. The typical American woman is fat.

2. American women have very bad attitudes.

3. American women have the worst fashion sense in the world.

4. Their extreme arrogance.

5. Their selfishness.

6. American women are generally immature.

7. American women usually make terrible bosses and co-workers.

8. Materialism and superficiality define the American woman.

9. American women can't cook.

10. The typical American woman is tattooed.

11. Their hatred for men.

12. American women are the most irrational beings on Earth.

13. American women do not possess much mental prowess.

14. Their infatuation with bad boys.

15. American women are in a state of denial.

I love this comment from Winston on that article:

Yeah he probably was. The pics above reflect that. White American women are the worst. Their personalities are highly toxic and they are so self-absorbed and arrogant that is it virtually impossible to connect with them or have a decent conversation with them.

Even Asian American women and European women visiting America have told me that they cannot connect with white American women either and did not make friends with them. White American women cannot even connect with each other. They are the most unconnectable women on the planet for sure. Every other type of women is far more down to earth.

The bottom line is that you can't have a "singles scene" or "dating scene" when the women in America have thrown femininity out the window.

[WanderingProtagonist]

This is a great article:

https://blog.happierabroad.com/2014/01/ ... women.html

Why American Women Suck - 15 Things I've Noticed

1. The typical American woman is fat.

2. American women have very bad attitudes.

3. American women have the worst fashion sense in the world.

4. Their extreme arrogance.

5. Their selfishness.

6. American women are generally immature.

7. American women usually make terrible bosses and co-workers.

8. Materialism and superficiality define the American woman.

9. American women can't cook.

10. The typical American woman is tattooed.

11. Their hatred for men.

12. American women are the most irrational beings on Earth.

13. American women do not possess much mental prowess.

14. Their infatuation with bad boys.

15. American women are in a state of denial.

I love this comment from Winston on that article:

Yeah he probably was. The pics above reflect that. White American women are the worst. Their personalities are highly toxic and they are so self-absorbed and arrogant that is it virtually impossible to connect with them or have a decent conversation with them.

Even Asian American women and European women visiting America have told me that they cannot connect with white American women either and did not make friends with them. White American women cannot even connect with each other. They are the most unconnectable women on the planet for sure. Every other type of women is far more down to earth.

The bottom line is that you can't have a "singles scene" or "dating scene" when the women in America have thrown femininity out the window.

The only one on here I somewhat disagree with is the cooking because some American women can cook, but they are mostly black women. They can cook better than white any woman in the United States especially black women from Southern states. By comparison with white ones they destroy them when it comes down to cooking. lol there's a reason why when blacks were slaves the slave masters needed the black women to cook. It's because their pathetic white women couldn't do it and im not even trying to be offensive about it either. Just know what I've read about how white slave owners would have black women cook the food, and my Uncle use to say "it's because white women can't cook." He dated them a lot before he finally married a black woman.

[kangarunner]

The only one on here I somewhat disagree with is the cooking because some American women can cook, but they are mostly black women. They can cook better than white any woman in the United States especially black women from Southern states. By comparison with white ones they destroy them when it comes down to cooking. lol there's a reason why when blacks were slaves the slave masters needed the black women to cook. It's because their pathetic white women couldn't do it and im not even trying to be offensive about it either. Just know what I've read about how white slave owners would have black women cook the food, and my Uncle use to say "it's because white women can't cook." He dated them a lot before he finally married a black woman.

There's another reason I'm disgusted to be a part of this country is slavery. And that was only a couple hundred years ago.

So far I've read others say this about white women: 1) That white men are leaving them 2) they show up more at abortion protests 3) they can't cook.

The white women I see around here, especially the blonde ones, have this bitchy look on their face. It's disgusting.

The more I think about it, with the "Karen" phenomenon and the bullshit white women are probably the worst out of all them.

I'm very much looking forward to going back to Asia where life is peaceful.

[WanderingProtagonist]

The only one on here I somewhat disagree with is the cooking because some American women can cook, but they are mostly black women. They can cook better than white any woman in the United States especially black women from Southern states. By comparison with white ones they destroy them when it comes down to cooking. lol there's a reason why when blacks were slaves the slave masters needed the black women to cook. It's because their pathetic white women couldn't do it and im not even trying to be offensive about it either. Just know what I've read about how white slave owners would have black women cook the food, and my Uncle use to say "it's because white women can't cook." He dated them a lot before he finally married a black woman.

There's another reason I'm disgusted to be a part of this country is slavery. And that was only a couple hundred years ago.

So far I've read others say this about white women: 1) That white men are leaving them 2) they show up more at abortion protests 3) they can't cook.

The white women I see around here, especially the blonde ones, have this bitchy look on their face. It's disgusting.

The more I think about it, with the "Karen" phenomenon and the bullshit white women are probably the worst out of all them.

I'm very much looking forward to going back to Asia where life is peaceful.

Well now to be fair everywhere did the slavery thing, and I honestly don't find much of that offensive considering the way blacks act anyway. It's like they need someone to beat their asses. Or at the very least people who don't live in fear of them. The fact some whites feel guilty about something like slavery when blacks were doing this to each other way before whites even got involved.
Just think about the history Japan has and the way they use to be before they got neutered and became America's bitch. I'm sure they don't feel any shame for what they did to the Chinese, and the Chinese don't have any guilt or shame for some of the things they've done either. For what it's worth you're a white man yourself but it's not your fault what happened all those years ago.

Besides you have to also look at the fact that whites were the first ones to end it, and nobody white even has slaves anymore other than the whites who use them in their cuckoldry relationships to cope with their guilt and inferiority problems which is quite sad as hell because blacks certainly don't feel any shame or guilt for the things their own do to people.

Then you have slavery in certain parts of Africa still going on today they even traffic little girls into sex slavery but nobody is challenging them for any of it either. It's just easier for society in the West to attack white people over something that happened years ago because they want to take the power away from them. But think about today and how the majority of blacks currently live in most Democratic States. Think about what they would gladly do to you if you crossed paths with any of them on the "wrong" day. All they need to do is just see that you're an easy target. I think people aught to stop feeling guilty about that whole slavery thing. After all, it's like I said.

Whites weren't the only ones that owned them, blacks have been free for years and the ones who still use slavery as an excuse to get away with shit, are quite pitiful. That's just them trying to exploit the white people that feel guilt and shame. They also do it so they can make the proud ones also feel guilty and ashamed. There's a lot to not like about America, but the past is the past and almost every nation on art to some degree had slavery or did something to someone else in the past. Asia even have some dark history of it's own if you dig deep enough into it.

Either way it certainly isn't a reason to really resent a country because of it's past history. That's one thing about the past no one can change, and when you really think about it. We're still slaves, and by we I mean all of us men especially those of us stuck in countries that make life impossible. We no longer have slavery, but if you lived in a place like Detroit or Chicago you will see a lot of blacks are enslaved to their minds and have extreme violent tendencies to go out and do harm to one of their own. All they need is to find a reason to, and if they don't have a reason? They'll just make one up out of boredom. Whatever it takes to kill one of their own or take something away from him. They'll make people feel less sorry that slavery even existed with the way they behave. When they aren't making their own people fear them, they are out harming Asians and groups they believe to be less likely to retaliate with equal force against them. That's why they commit the most violent crimes in America, the West is weak and sympathize too much with the past.

[Mercury]

More reasons why there is no dating scene in the USA.

1. Single men, more than ever, are getting banned from a rapidly growing number of bars, restaurants, and nightclubs in the USA, a growing number of which are passing new "No Single Men" policies.

2. The extreme vast majority of millennial and post-millennial American women are in gangs. And we're talking violent gangs, like the Gangster Disciples, Latin Kings, MS-13, Los Zetas, Mickey Cobras, Black Pistons, the Vice Lords, and the Gangster Crips. Many of those same women have even done jail time for illegal drugs and involvement in crime. No wonder American women are so infatuated with bad boys!

3. With a population of 71% men and 29% women, usually the only American women that are single and "outcasted" are the biggest heavysets. Women big enough to be classified as supermorbidly obese. You're talking women that are 450, even 600 pounds and bigger and that look like they have Prader-Willi Syndrome. The attractive ones, their standards are 90210; they won't date you unless either you're in a violent gang (Crips, Latin Kings, Gangster Disciples, etc) or you work for Paramount Pictures or Warner Bros. Studios in Los Angeles.

[rainbanx]

I lived in Europe for several years and wanted to point one important factor and that is that the culture there is more open in terms of sexuality.
p4p is legal and commonplace.

For example, in the city where I lived there was nice building that was like a five star hotel with around a 100 hoes. These were nice attractive women who would do what ever you want for less $50.

I think when men have this option available it really puts women in a less controlling position.

The problem with the US is that p4p is illegal.

This is spot on, studies show that in countries where p4p is legal, the woman are easier to meet and date because men don't need a girlfriend in order to get laid, they can simply go visit a hoe. So men don't put women on pedestals in countries that have legalized p4p.

What city in Europe did you live in mfpinwa? I can't wait to take my trip to Germany!

I should bring you to Amsterdarm, Athens or even in Germany (to bang this hotties)
But if your looking for a European chick for long term relations, then we definitely should go to Lithuania or Latvia. lol