First off there's this misconception that Asian-american women are the same as asian women everywhere else. This is absolutely false and AA women are 100% americanized western women. This is something that a lot of guys can't separate in their heads for some reason. This means Asian-American women have largely the same demands, attitudes, and unrealistic expectations as white American women but also a thickly layered on level of emotional and racial insecurity as well. I'll get into that a bit more later..
Here are some reasons why Asian-American women dislike Asian men:
1) Daddy issues. Very few girls are going to admit this if you don't know them well but 1st generation asian fathers in the U.S. are usually awful to their daughters. The dads are too strict, fobbish, uncool, and very beta in behavior. They daughters aren't taken care of in any meaningful way or given any life lessons. It's not unusual for a lot of 2nd generation AA women to absolutely hate or have no respect for their fathers on some level. I found this to be very common with the hardcore insecure asian-american women. They dated outside the race to piss off daddy as well as to erase their own dysfunctional upbringing.
2) General self loathing. Barbie is blonde. Ken is blonde. The media shows the best looking women and men as white. You have Latino and Black women who are pretty famous and pervasive in American media. Asian women have Lucy Liu and a piece of trash like Tila Tequila. That's about it. When they see asian women on tv they are usually supplicating to some white people or having sex with white people. So their standards of beauty are internalized as white only. Just like good ambitious asians they want to be the white ideal for competitive reasons too. That's why you see some asian-american girls run around with cheesy dyed hair and blue contacts or adopting hilariously stupid valley girl type accents. They are mental cripples.
3) Status. The second best thing you can get aside from trying to look white is to date white. Asian women latch onto predominately white men as a status symbol. You hear a plethora of reasons why they prefer white men etc.. but really it just comes down to asian style hypergamy. Dating a white man is like purchasing a Hermes bag. It's used to show off her social status. It has nothing to do with bigger dingalings, wallets, height etc.. it has everything to do with racial approval seeking. That's why you don't see asian women dating black or latinos anywhere close to the same proportion.
4) Beta asian males. I read mguy's critical comments about asian-american men in another thread and I have to agree on some level. The same things that cripple asian-american women mentally and emotionally in the U.S. also have some effect on a lot of asian-american men. Except with men it tends to create passive betas with no social skills. This is not as true if an asian guy grew up in a major U.S. city like Honolulu, NYC, or the LA area but it's very true if they grew up in 2nd tier cities or in the boonies where there are no asians. So a lot of AA guys come off as weaklings or social retards if they have no positive social group of friends growing up. The U.S. media reinforces that image. Other minorities relentlessly rip into us whenever they can too. So it builds up to an overall negative portrayal of Asian men in the U.S.
5) Religion. This is a pretty minor thing but significant in the bigger picture when it comes to culture. Most asians are secular. There are a lot of practicing catholics, buddhists, etc.. but when you look at daily life most asian-americans actually live very secular lives. This means any kind of mentality to preserve the cultural family unit for traditional reasons are non-existent. Compare Asian-Americans with Indian-Americans. Indians are very adamant about marrying other Indians because their culture and religion demands it in most cases. Arab-Americans marry mostly Arab-Americans if they are muslim. Again, religion.
In the past asians followed this type of culture with marriages of convenience and arranged family marriages but it doesn't really happen much anymore. Asians who come to America almost never practice this.
6) Lack of identity. Asian-Americans are only 4% of the U.S. population. I'd say maybe a third to half of those people are fairly recent immigrants. This means you have some 2nd generation born AA's mixed in with a lot of fobs too. There's no cohesive pan-asian identity. You have dumb asian kids trying to act, talk, and dress black. You have asian kids wearing A&F trying to act like preppy whites. You have dumb ass fobs who try to act like they are back in the motherland. You have asian pride guys who are mostly angry virgins. Not to mention there's all sorts of inter-ethnic asian rivalries. Koreans hating Japs hating Chinese hating Vietnamese etc.. etc.. It's a huge cluster f**k.
It's not like latinos or blacks in the U.S. who have developed a solid American cultural foundation and identity. If you're black at least you know where you stand. Asian-Americans don't know what the f**k is going on half the time. So when you have a lack of your own cultural identity it's easy to latch onto the mainstream as your identity.
These are the top 6 that I can think of for now. Feel free to add your own and i'll vet it for authenticity.
I dated several asian-american girls and really got into their heads about a lot of these insecurities. I understand this demographic very well.
