My friend can't enjoy anything without a woman? How sad!

[Winston]

Hi all,
I want to get something off my chest. My friend Steve R claims that beautiful nature can't be enjoyed without a woman or romantic partner by your side. Wtf?! That's so ridiculous. No one who is spiritual or able to connect with nature would say that.

In fact, his attitude seems to be that everything sucks and that nothing is enjoyable without a woman! What a sad and terrible attitude he seems to have! I'm beginning to think maybe he's a bad influence on me, because he keeps trying to inject his bad attitude into me, and I'm a highly sensitive person.

How can someone think this way? What's next? He can't enjoy a good dinner, good book, good movie, good music, or a nice hot bubble bath, without a woman either?!

Sure I feel lonely in America too. But a healthy evolved man is supposed to enjoy BOTH, time alone and time with lovers/friends. He is NOT supposed to have the attitude that "Life sucks and nothing is enjoyable without a woman" like Steve does. Geez. That's a really shitty poo hoo attitude. WTF? I don't get him. What is his problem? The worst thing is that he tries to rub off his attitude on me!

He is holding a classic fallacy that assumes that because he's not spiritual, then other guys aren't either, and that because he can't connect with nature, then other people can't either. NOT TRUE. In fact, no one who truly connects with nature would ever say that it can't be enjoyed without a romantic partner. NO ONE. That's totally WRONG, and reflective of a very sad and terrible attitude. Do you think the famous nature writer/explorer John Muir (which Muir Woods is named after) would ever say or think that? Hell no!

Remember the great epic film "Dances with Wolves"? In it, John Dunbar, played by Kevin Costner, goes to the frontier to be posted at a fort in Indian territory after becoming a hero in the Civil War. He goes there because he wants to see the frontier before it's gone. When he arrives, he enjoys the nature, wilderness and peace of mind there. But after many months, when no relief from the army comes to the fort, he starts to feel lonely and isolated, before. This was before he met the Indians. He wrote in his diary that he was struggling with loneliness and lack of human companionship. But he NEVER wrote that he could not enjoy or appreciate the wilderness without human company. He never said that it was all worthless without a woman.

Can you imagine Steve in the role of John Dunbar? No way! lol

Again, sure I feel lonely and isolated in America too. But I can still enjoy nature, a good book, a good movie, meditation, studying history/philosophy, a good restaurant, a hot bubble bath, good music, etc. Why not? I'm not going to say that "Oh no, everything sucks and is not worth enjoying without a woman." That's a really shitty TERRIBLE ATTITUDE to have, and very sad too. How can a guy think like that?!

Besides, his logic is wrong. I can understand that it's pointless to be alone in a crowded area, because it makes you look like a loser and makes you feel self-conscientious. But if you are alone at home or alone in nature, then it becomes a non-issue. Simply put, if no one else is around, then there's no one to judge you. So what does it matter if you're alone or not?

What does he expect me to do? NOT enjoy the beauty of America just because HE thinks it's pointless?! Geez!

A second problem:

Another problem is that he has bad ideas about business. He claims that I am giving away too much info for free on Happier Abroad, and that I ought to make it a private club with very little public info and charge money for admission.

Here's the problem with that:

Every great speaker and motivational/self-help guru gives away information and advice for free. That's how they reach out and connect with people. Examples are Tony Robbins and Wayne Dyer. They give away a ton of content for free, yet people still pay for their materials, books and seminars, because they love them. They know how to reach out and connect with people. They are still very successful, and in fact, Tony Robbins is the most successful motivational guru in the America. If you knew anything about them, you'd know that. One thing they do NOT do, is tell all their fans that they have to join a "private club" before they will tell them anything. That would be stupid and shady.

What Steve suggests is that one should only give out five minutes of info or one short paragraph of info, and then charge big bucks for the rest of the info! That's the kind of attitude and tactics that a CON ARTIST or HUSTLER focused on SHORT TERM RESULTS would have! Geez! Yet he speaks so adamantly about it! Dang! I can't believe it.

Understand this: NO successful motivational speaker operates that way. NONE. Name one successful guru that operate the way he recommends. Just one! You can't! So why does he insist on such bad shitty ideas? Where does he get them? What is his basis? Geez. WTF?!

There is no reason or precedent for such a strategy. Only con artists, scammers and hustlers looking for a quick buck operate like that. Only shady characters give a little info and then ask for a lot of money for the rest of it. Think about it.

And why does he say that I give away too much free info for free on HappierAbroad.com? Wtf? What does he expect me to do? Have only one short paragraph and one 5 minute video on my home page, and then ask people to pay big bucks for the rest of the site? Is he crazy? Ask any sane person on my forum if that would be better for this movement. If I did that, my site would suck majorly! I'm not going to screw up my movement with his bad ideas. NO WAY JOSE!!!!!!

I'm not self-destructive and I don't like to make foolish decisions. I'm not the kind of guy who earns $80,000 and then squanders it all in bad investments and then becomes broke, as Steve claims to have done. Why do white guys always seem to squander all their money on bad investments or gambling and then become broke?! Is it in their genes or blood to be self-destructive? None of my Asian friends have ever done that! Only white guys seem to do that. Why?!

It seems he is way too consumed by GREED. He doesn't enjoy helping others unless he's rewarded with big bucks for it. WTH?! That's a really BAD attitude. The universe does not reward such an attitude. People who enjoy helping others without being hung up on consequences are the ones who get rewarded. Why doesn't he get that?

I've noticed that even when he plays a board game, he will keep trying to take a second turn without waiting for me to take my turn. LOL. Usually everyone will wait their turn, but he doesn't for some reason, even after he's reminded many times! Taking two turns is illegal. Even kids know that! So how can he keep forgetting that? LOL. Sometimes the little things speak volumes. Even though it's just a board game, this reflects a huge impulsiveness in his personality to act without thinking. That's very dangerous and reckless when carried out into the real world.

He also thinks that just by putting up a webpage or Twitter page with little content and a phone number, that he will get instant results and monetary rewards! And then when it doesn't happen, he gripes and complains that guys out there are too lazy and stingy! WTH? That's totally unrealistic.

For example, here is his matchmaking site:

http://www.guysdatingutopia.info
which redirects to:
https://twitter.com/matchmakerradio

As you can see, it contains a bunch of tweets and links, a one sentence intro, and a phone number. Very little content at all. And then he expects instant results with that, and then blames everyone when he doesn't?!

WTF is he thinking? I don't get him. Do you? Why can't he see the folly of his ways and change? His reasoning and strategy don't make sense.

[Teal Lantern]

Hi all,
I want to get something off my chest. My friend Steve R claims that beautiful nature can't be enjoyed without a woman or romantic partner by your side. Wtf?! That's so ridiculous. No one who is spiritual or able to connect with nature would say that.

He sounds like most normal western men, to me.
Even the self-proclaimed players eventually get snagged by "the one".
Look at Mystery.

[tre]

He sounds needy, entitled and undisciplined.

Everyone should need some alone time. There are some conversations I can't have with a woman, only with other men. Also, I NEED to be alone sometimes...necessary for my sanity. I enjoy going to the gym by myself...MUCH better workouts when I'm on my own where I can focus 100% on what I'm doing. I work better alone on practically everything. I enjoy my recreational time to be spent with others as well, but not ALL the time.

I remember walking the streets of Singapore by myself and enjoying every minute of it. I noticed and observed things I would have never noticed if I'd had a woman gabbing in my ear the entire time.

You are doing your site the correct way. You wouldn't have anywhere NEAR the traffic if you weren't doing it the way you are.

[Winston]

Tre,
Yes he is. That's true. You know, I've invited him to Red Rock and Mt. Charleston a number of times, but he always refuses saying that it's pointless to go up to the mountains and enjoy fresh air without a cute girl to accompany him. Isn't that sad? How can someone be like that?

I certainly don't want to be infected with such an attitude by someone who thinks that way, lest he ruin my ability to enjoy nature too. God forbid.

In a sense he is desecrating nature by claiming that it is meaningless and pointless without a romantic partner to enjoy it with! Wtf?! That's so f***ed!

I also don't like traveling with others, because disagreements and arguments often arise, and missed opportunities too because the person with me doesn't want to wait for me to do this or that. Thus it reduces freedom and disturbs peace of mind. It's even more frustrating when you're with someone who makes reckless decisions and can't help himself.

[tre]

Sounds like you'd best distance yourself. Why hang with those who drag you down? He sounds pretty desperate when it comes to women and those are exactly the types that will ALWAYS have problems getting/maintaining women. You'd best break away and work on your own progression and happiness.

I was hiking Red Rock a few days ago. I did hike it with my GF, but it wasn't romantic or anything...lol. We are WAY past that...just getting out into nature and getting some exercise. I'd just as soon hike with one of my guy friends. We also hiked Sedona on our way back and then the Chiricahua National Monument today. It helps to get out of the house and into the mountains. It is the one of the very few things I like about the USA....wide open spaces of nature (few people).

[Mr.Darcy]

Gah, I hate it when people do this. Winston you sound like somebody from a pua site. Why make generalizations that men dont need women, but still actively pursue women or already have one. The major reason why people want to move abroad is for women. Hence, you are willing to sacrifice the best living conditions for a third world country, but with a better rating if meeting a woman. Humans are also social creatures too. If majority of early humans were lone wolves than we would not have made it even close to this far.

[HouseMD]

Gah, I hate it when people do this. Winston you sound like somebody from a pua site. Why make generalizations that men dont need women, but still actively pursue women or already have one. The major reason why people want to move abroad is for women. Hence, you are willing to sacrifice the best living conditions for a third world country, but with a better rating if meeting a woman. Humans are also social creatures too. If majority of early humans were lone wolves than we would not have made it even close to this far.

Men who go abroad just for the p***y tend to not fare so well. The ones who do well are those who are looking for adventure and don't view a lack of conveniences as a negative but rather as part of a cultural experience. It isn't a sacrifice, but rather a trade, of one type of living for another. If you view the American way of life as superior, you will surely fail abroad, for you'll always be wishing you had the foreign girls and the American way of life.

If a man cannot be happy in his own company, I would argue that he is hardly a man at all. A woman should be a companion to your happiness, not the cause of it. To put such dependency as a core need is pathetic. A woman, to me, is like a nice glass of wine, while a life well lived is like a perfect cut of steak. Without the wine, the steak is certainly wonderful, and not at all lacking. The wine, however, serves as a compliment, to enrich the flavor of the meal rather than make it on its own. I view men that are only happy with a woman by their side as drunks-preoccupied so much by the beverage that they are missing out on the meal itself.

[Maverick]

Gah, I hate it when people do this. Winston you sound like somebody from a pua site. Why make generalizations that men dont need women, but still actively pursue women or already have one. The major reason why people want to move abroad is for women. Hence, you are willing to sacrifice the best living conditions for a third world country, but with a better rating if meeting a woman. Humans are also social creatures too. If majority of early humans were lone wolves than we would not have made it even close to this far.

Men who go abroad just for the p***y tend to not fare so well. The ones who do well are those who are looking for adventure and don't view a lack of conveniences as a negative but rather as part of a cultural experience. It isn't a sacrifice, but rather a trade, of one type of living for another. If you view the American way of life as superior, you will surely fail abroad, for you'll always be wishing you had the foreign girls and the American way of life.

If a man cannot be happy in his own company, I would argue that he is hardly a man at all. A woman should be a companion to your happiness, not the cause of it. To put such dependency as a core need is pathetic. A woman, to me, is like a nice glass of wine, while a life well lived is like a perfect cut of steak. Without the wine, the steak is certainly wonderful, and not at all lacking. The wine, however, serves as a compliment, to enrich the flavor of the meal rather than make it on its own. I view men that are only happy with a woman by their side as drunks-preoccupied so much by the beverage that they are missing out on the meal itself.

Well, I do agree with this, but if a guy has had zero success with women and can't get ANY woman that he wants into his life, then I believe he's justified in feeling like Steve.

Like it or not, romantic relationships are a major part of happiness. If you are unable to get one at all, you will most likely be a bit angry and bitter.

Here in the US, this scenario is common to many men.

[tre]

Men who go abroad just for the p***y tend to not fare so well. The ones who do well are those who are looking for adventure and don't view a lack of conveniences as a negative but rather as part of a cultural experience. It isn't a sacrifice, but rather a trade, of one type of living for another. If you view the American way of life as superior, you will surely fail abroad, for you'll always be wishing you had the foreign girls and the American way of life.

If a man cannot be happy in his own company, I would argue that he is hardly a man at all. A woman should be a companion to your happiness, not the cause of it. To put such dependency as a core need is pathetic. A woman, to me, is like a nice glass of wine, while a life well lived is like a perfect cut of steak. Without the wine, the steak is certainly wonderful, and not at all lacking. The wine, however, serves as a compliment, to enrich the flavor of the meal rather than make it on its own. I view men that are only happy with a woman by their side as drunks-preoccupied so much by the beverage that they are missing out on the meal itself.

I agree 100%. It's not a sacrifice to move abroad to those who stay abroad successfully for many years. They prefer the way of life where they are at. The USA sucks and it's not just the women that suck. Being in a 3rd World country where people are friendly and happier is better than being in a 1st World country (for now) where people are miserable. Paying $2 for a good meal is better than paying $15 in the USA. Paying $200/month for rent is better than paying $1500/month. Outside of hiking in areas where there are few people, there are few things that interest me in the USA. In contrast, I was fascinated by so many things abroad. The list could go on and on.

If one is miserable on their own all the time, they will always be looking for that external magic bullet to make them happy and will never find it. Yes, most people do need human interaction. However, Steve HAS human interaction with others and he doesn't treat them very well. He takes them for granted and seems to only care about $$. Human relationships (male or female) are give and take....not just take. Selfishness will not get you very far if you seek to be more social...

[Winston]

Gah, I hate it when people do this. Winston you sound like somebody from a pua site. Why make generalizations that men dont need women, but still actively pursue women or already have one. The major reason why people want to move abroad is for women. Hence, you are willing to sacrifice the best living conditions for a third world country, but with a better rating if meeting a woman. Humans are also social creatures too. If majority of early humans were lone wolves than we would not have made it even close to this far.

I do not sound like someone from a PUA site. I never said that men don't need women. I said that things can be enjoyable alone or without a woman. What do you expect me to say? That beautiful nature, mountains, fresh air, landscapes and canyons can't be enjoyed without a woman? That's an insult to sacred nature and Mother Earth.

Sure we feel lonely without a woman. That's natural. But that doesn't mean that loneliness makes you unable to enjoy anything in life. Come on. That's too extreme. Suffering and pain are a part of life. The key is in learning to manage it and balance it.

But to say "I can't enjoy the beautiful mountains without a woman because there's no point in going to the mountains without a woman" is just a poo hoo shitty attitude. There's no reason why you can't enjoy nature or the mountains even if you feel lonely. It just doesn't make sense. No one who is spiritual or connects with nature deeply would think that.

Some guys just don't care about nature that much. That's probably why they say that. Steve is probably one of them. He's the kind of guy whose life revolves only around making money and picking up women, and has few other passions and interests, if any.

[Winston]

Well, I do agree with this, but if a guy has had zero success with women and can't get ANY woman that he wants into his life, then I believe he's justified in feeling like Steve.

Like it or not, romantic relationships are a major part of happiness. If you are unable to get one at all, you will most likely be a bit angry and bitter.

Here in the US, this scenario is common to many men.

But Steve was married for 14 years to a woman he said was wonderful and pretty. And in Thailand, he claims to have slept with 10 or 15 pretty girls without paying.

Sure I'm bitter too, about a lot of things, from years of disappointment, sadness and alienation. But that doesn't mean that I can't enjoy nature. In fact, nature is a good therapeutic environment that's good for spirituality, relief from stress, and peace of mind. So it should be a source of healing.

[innovatorsclub]

Dude grow up and quit trash talking, bringing up personal details and slandering people. Doing this over the last 48 hours while people in the Phillipines are suffering.. Get a life and you wonder why you are an outcast and cant keep any friends. Maybe it's because this is how you will eventually treat them. Give it a rest, stop the lies and show some compassion for the suffering people in the phillipines. and put a lid on it already

[Winston]

Dude grow up and quit trash talking, bringing up personal details and slandering people. Doing this over the last 48 hours while people in the Phillipines are suffering.. Get a life and you wonder why you are an outcast and cant keep any friends. Maybe it's because this is how you will eventually treat them. Give it a rest, stop the lies and show some compassion for the suffering people in the phillipines. and put a lid on it already

Actually yes I can. Ask Rock, Ladislav, Jeff Rich, or Falcon. They have known me a lot longer than you and I've never backstabbed them, even though we've had our disagreements and feuds. I don't give people what they don't deserve.

Also, my female friend Elizabeth in Reno, whom I've known since 2001, read my long letter to you about why I was pissed, and she said she agreed with me. You can ask her if I have ever backstabbed anyone. Yes she is a real person. See a photo of us here:
viewtopic.php?p=87782#87782

At least I don't call our fellow bros in this movement "undeserving" like you did. That reflects your real attitude toward us, which is not good. You did say that and you know it. Therefore, you are the real traitor here.

See here:
viewtopic.php?p=157965#157965

Also, stop using the typhoon disaster in the Philippines to cover up the truth about yourself and your attitude toward. Are you trying to cover up your flaws and true feelings about us by pretending to show compassion for the typhoon victims? That's a cheap attempt to subvert the blame on yourself. If you have no feelings of compassion for your fellow bros in this movement, as you've stated numerous times, then how could you possibly have compassion for victims that you don't know in the Philippines? Come on now. Nice try.

[Mr.Darcy]

If one is confidential in his ability to gain a woman than there is no need for him to feel like ass regardless if he is single or not. However, if one is struggling with women and he has force feed his mind to make him feel better than this will surely degrade his mood. Name me one successful person that is just struggling with women right now?

[innovatorsclub]

You are doing exactly what far too many women in America do to their ex husbands. Re-write history and the truth to demonize to make you look better. I lost all respect for you and credibility for your "truth movement"
Yes I said deserving and I mean it. You don't know me and my passion and diverse experiences that helped create it. It's clear I am all about empowering deserving people. My time stamped posts alone show this. I happen to think that selfish , materialistic and bad people don't deserve to get valuable information without earning it. EARNING IT WINSTON. Helping people with referrals or showing you stand for something is a way to EARN IT. ( give to people in need) STOP making assumptions without relevant details and demonizing people to make yourself look better. That is truly a weak person and occurs far too often with the people you claim aren't as good as foreign women.