Trying to enrich my dating life, might need some help

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Esombeed
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Posts: 1
Joined: July 8th, 2016, 8:58 pm

Trying to enrich my dating life, might need some help

Post by Esombeed »

Heya :P ,I am writing this post, because of the fact I am having difficulties for a while to get to know the ladies, I have no idea whether or not has something connected with me personally, or maybe if it is just out of nasty luck.

I have been going out around a couple times a week, most commonly to night clubs and bars, It is been really hard to do, considering that I'm not really the type of fella that's known for how sociable or outgoing he is. I felt sort of uneasy and distressed, and its kind of difficult for me (much more) to talk in those kinds of enviroment with the gals, even thought, I've accomplished it, I've not had a good deal of succes, would you fellas give me some guidance?


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MrMark1972
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Posts: 92
Joined: April 18th, 2014, 12:41 pm
Location: The United States of Canada

Re: trying to enrich my dating lifetime, might need some hel

Post by MrMark1972 »

Esombeed wrote:Heya :P ,I am writing this post, because of the fact I am having difficulties for a while to get to know the ladies, I have no idea whether or not has something connected with me personally, or maybe if it is just out of nasty luck.

I have been going out around a couple times a week, most commonly to night clubs and bars, It is been really hard to do, considering that I'm not really the type of fella that's known for how sociable or outgoing he is. I felt sort of uneasy and distressed, and its kind of difficult for me (much more) to talk in those kinds of enviroment with the gals, even thought, I've accomplished it, I've not had a good deal of succes, would you fellas give me some guidance?
In a word...travel...that is the mission of this website.If you rely on bars and clubs it can really destroy your self-esteem as the women there are out for an ego boost and will usually only go home with a guy who fits their "type".Also please don't fall for all the online PUA scam artists...you would be better off waking up early on Sunday and trying to meet a nice church-going girl.
Signet
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Posts: 120
Joined: April 15th, 2011, 12:25 am
Location: Bellingham, WA

Re: Trying to enrich my dating life, might need some help

Post by Signet »

You can get shot down anywhere, not just at clubs in the U.S. (or wherever it is you're from). If you are super uncomfortable talking to people, then traveling will either not help, or will only help in an abstract way -- like, you HAVE to talk to strangers just to get everyday things done, and there will often be a communication barrier, so you will get a certain amount of forced practice and 'wow, I really did that' moments. It may be easier to strike up conversations in other places because people are more sociable, and they may be charmed by slightly different things, but there is nowhere in the world where the girls like it if you come off as a weird creeper. At the point you're at, I wouldn't travel just for women **. If you really want to go see some place and also try to date women, it wouldn't hurt to try killing two birds with one stone. But otherwise, it seems like you are still at the point where you need to learn to dissociate your 'failures' with women from damaging your sense of self-worth.

If you get to the point where you can chat people up without it getting to you, then travel will be a good option.

I can't really give any better or more focused advice, since I don't know very much about your situation.

** obviously, if you are using some kind of meetup or personals website ahead of time to find people who are already down to hang out with you, this might yield entirely different results. You may also find very friendly hosts on airbnb, but it's not something to count on.
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