Contrarian Expatriate wrote: ↑July 25th, 2020, 5:00 am
Winston I would be careful taking any "advice" from @Hypermak. I have been observing his posting history for some time now and I can tell you with 100% certainty that he is simply not well. That's a pretty serious thing for me to write, I know. But why do I say that? Well, consider his tendencies to repeatedly do the following.
Woah, that's rich, coming from you, man.
A psychological profiling coming from a textbook case of delusions of grandeur (
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grandiose ... l%20theme.), a pathetic, senile "fake till you make it" "successful" entrepreneur whose narrative is maybe 10% true, on a good day.
Contrarian Expatriate wrote: ↑July 25th, 2020, 5:00 am
- Invalidation is the process of denying, rejecting or dismissing someone's feelings. The invalidated person will often leave a conversation feeling confused and full of self-doubt. Some individuals knowingly invalidate others as a form of manipulation, control, and psychological injury. Hypermak in this very thread repeatedly invalidates your descriptions of the great times you had in Europe. A healthy person would be glad for you and encourage you to expand on how Europe suits your personality. However, Hypermak was deriding your experiences as tourist-based and trying to convince you that living in Europe would give you a much more negative experience. I can tell you first hand that LIVING in Europe is far more satisfying socially than visiting as a tourist so he is full of negative crap as usual.
The only thing I have ever been rejecting and dismissing, not without entertainment and pleasure, is the absolutely gigantic amount of BS you lay at every single post of yours. You're a government officer but you've been living in Europe for years, you have income streams from multiple businesses but all you can mention are a bunch of phony business gurus, whose followers are - no surprise - typical chest-pumping "I'm king of the world" types like you. You are surrounded by Ukrainian "9s and 10s" whom you can keep on the leash with a few hundred dollars a month but quite a few locals laughed it off as a pathetic fantasy of yours.
So I am sorry, I don't buy any of it. If
@Winston or someone else does, good for you, it means that your ego can continue to feed on their validation. Not mine, though.
I am a European citizen, have been living in and around Europe for most of my life, and I can tell Winston and you that living in Europe is no dream, especially in this delicate junction of history (Covid, rise of unemployment and crises, populism and geopolitical tensions at the seams, etc.).
I am intrigued by your line of thinking. Living in Europe is "far more satisfying socially" than where? The US? An African impoverished village? The Philippines?
Living anywhere in the world is more satisfying if one doesn't have to work a single day, doesn't have to live any of the daily routine of an average working citizen, and has 3 or 4,000 dollars a month to spend. They have time to walk around the beautiful architecture, read good books, learn the local language, eat the food they want without having to cook and wash after them, hang around different groups of people until they find "a fit", et cetera.
I don't know Winston and his personal story well enough to give specific advice. All I know is what transpires from his past posts and his continuous complaining about Taiwan, the Philippines, China, etc. As a European I know, for a fact, that living in Europe when you have to live like an average European is no heaven and certainly not much better than living anywhere else.
What makes the difference is not the piazzas and monuments around you, or the percentage of hot girls walking down the streets, it's the fact that you can live in Europe like a forever tourist: without working and with plenty of money, versus having to find a 9-5 job, worrty about bills to pay, and have limited time to socialize.
And where have I not advised Winston to hit Russia or Eastern Europe to get another shot of those fun times as a tourist?
I have written that on every single post on the topic, go and read back if you're not sure. The extra bit I did is give him a dose or realism to temper his expectations, probably sweetened up by nostalgia and naivety.
Trying to be objective, out of experience, might have not come down well with him, that's understandable. Yet, it's still much better than giving sugarcoated advice based on experiences that have been, mostly, happening in your deluded mind. A delusional individual like you cannot produce sound advice, grounded in reality. He can only produce more of the "everything is gonna be alright", optimistic at all costs kind of narrative.
Contrarian Expatriate wrote: ↑July 25th, 2020, 5:00 am
- Gaslighting (with continuous negative reinforcement) is manipulating someone by psychological means into questioning their own perceptions of reality. Hypermak, including in this very thread, concocts UNTRUE tales that once you live in Europe permanently, Europeans magically realize this and view you with evil, suspicious eyes, and will treat you with anti-immigrant hatred. This has NEVER been my experience and I am confident that it would not be yours either. He wants you to be wary or not attempt to live in Europe.
I have never said that Europeans will see Winston with "evil, suspicious eyes". You always make sh*t up but at least try to quote correctly. All I initially said is that, if he settles permanently in Europe, he will have to find a job, pay bills and go through his daily chores like everybody else in Europe. He will find a few friends and maybe a relationship with a woman but he will have to earn whatever he gets, pretty much the same way the average European does. He will go through the same pros and cons of routine life in Europe, which I can't compare with life in the US since I have never lived there, but certainly is not the paradise Winston seems to remember.
Contrarian Expatriate wrote: ↑July 25th, 2020, 5:00 am
My analysis of Hypermak: Two troubling things jump out at me concerning Hypermak.
LOL thanks Doc, you just saved me thousands in medical bills
Contrarian Expatriate wrote: ↑July 25th, 2020, 5:00 am
First, due likely to the fact that he did not enjoy living in Europe, he has taken it upon himself to convince others that they would not enjoy it either. In fact, speaking well of living in Europe triggers him into doubling down about why it would be so bad for you. For example, everyone knows that I have been spending my summers in Ukraine and I LOVE it there. Hypermak was for some reason bothered by this so he came up with a narrative that I was lying about Ukraine because his "Ukrainian colleagues" (I don't believe they even exist) said I could never love it there as a black man and I would be physically attacked by local men there if I were found walking around with young women. What he does not realize is I have been traveling there for YEARS and I have had nothing but positive experiences with the men and the women there when I am with young girls. Again, I see Hypermak as being resentful of my enjoyment of Ukraine so he makes a concerted effort to try to undermine my enjoyment. It is insecurity and envy at the heart of this behavior, and I see him attempting to convince you also that you would not like Europe as you imagine you would. See that behavior of his for what it is worth.
Second, constant negativity of that duration and nature is a symptom of clinical depression. Hypermak can't seem to live with himself unless others take on his negative outlook on everything that other people find enjoyable. They say that misery loves company. I see Hypermak frantically take it upon himself to get others to join him in fear, foreboding, and misery as much as possible.
So do yourself a favor and reject any and all advice from him. Seeking advice from someone with these characteristics will lead you to second guess what you already know to be true for you. And it will also potentially dissuade you from pursuing your European dream altogether. The young man needs help so don't let him pull you down to his level of negativity and personal pain.
Again, laying BS along the path. What makes you so sure I never enjoyed living in Europe? I had most of my life and career there and this stint in Manila is my first one outside Europe. In a couple of years I might be in Dubai, or Tokyo, or back home, for what I know. That wouldn't mean that I hated Manila. Common sense understanding is beyond you?
I have to keep repeating myself: you loved Ukraine because you were spending your pension dollars like a king. What made your experience enjoyable is the fact that you didn't have to work and had as much free time and money as you wanted. Under those circumstances you could have enjoyed life anywhere in the world where cost of living is not sky-high.
I told you many times, what I don't like about you is that, for every ounce of real life experience, you have to throw in a pound of arrogance and braggadocio. Nothing wrong in buying companionship and sex in Ukraine, but don't make it sound you're the ultimate king of the jungle. Else you do attract criticism and derision, and you can't call people negative and sick when that happens. They're simply pointing the fingers to you and say "the emperor has no clothes" (thanks for correcting me on that saying, by the way).
By all means let's leave Winston to pursue his "European dream", which everyone is entitled to. We wouldn't act as friends and supporters, though, if we didn't give him a measure of realism to prepare them to the "soft landing" when they wake up from the dream and have to face reality.
Giving him forcefully positive advice based on experiences that are very particular to you (forever tourist on passive income) and don't capture the reality of everyday life, is quite bad. I am not saying you don't have good intentions, but giving someone false expectations is probably just as bad as pissing on his parade with overly critical (or "negative") advice.
Contrarian Expatriate wrote: ↑July 25th, 2020, 5:00 am
I say go back to Europe whenever you can and enjoy the lifestyle there that you enjoyed before. Never let sick people like him tell you they know what is better for you than you!
Wasn't that my conclusion too, dumbass?!
