My Mexican girlfriend vs. American college girls

[jldajio71]

[quote="Falcon"] If you don't have at least some of the following, you're simply not going to "click" with the other girls on campus, EVEN if you're very good-looking or have a great personality.

- Valley girl accent
- Social networking addiction, especially Facebook
- Use "like" in many of your sentences
- The typical SoCal suburban wear, such as Abercrombie & Fitch, American Eagle
- Own an iPhone, iPod, SmartPhone, BlackBerry, or at least some other related gadget so you won't appear "technologically behind"
- Be obsessed with American entertainment - e.g., pop songs, movies
- Participate in the college drinking and partying scene, and maybe also the notorious hookup scene
- Go to Las Vegas or San Francisco for vacation
- Know about California sports, such as basketball, baseball, football tournaments
- "Hang out" with a group of friends by going shopping or to the movies, and text them before you do. Take lots of pics with everyone so you can post them all on Facebook later.

... I just don't have any of the features listed above. No one will ever say it out loud, but you'll be "different" or perhaps even "weird" if you don't.[/quote]


This is absolutely true. Being a college girl student, I was googling this subject because I seemed to have a hard time holding a simple conversation with any girls on campus. I'm glad you put it out there because I thought it was just me thinking "why are all these girls so obsessed with partying and jersey whatever." They always seem to be up to date on shows that happen every week or something and just want to talk about what so and so did on the show ... I just don't find any of it interesting. I much rather watch "How the Universe Works" or "Through the Wormhole" on SCI. You can't just ask any southern college girl, "Did you watch that episode of 'Through the Wormhole' about quantum physics?" They'll simply laugh and make a joke about you. Girls think it's "cool" to be put on probabtion of financial aid. They simply are not grateful for the education and opportunities out there for them. It's just sad to think this is what they think life is about... drinking, facebook, drama and mtv. I wish more girls had your view of American girls (I know you're a guy) and disagreed with it but they simply think it's "normal." They have no idea what's going on in the world and where we will be in thirty years from now (economically, technology, and enviornmentally wise). Everything and anything that matters to them is what they see on T.V., Music Videos, Facebook, and on their texts. I also do not have a single thing on the list that pertains to me, except for the ipod thing. I got it as a gift and use it probably once a month to look up my grades in an emergency. If you are a girl like me that has nothing on this list that pertains to you, you are "different" and even "weird" like the author said. Just stick to your views and I bet in the end we will come out on top. Those "cool" and "in" girls will refer to you as "boss" in the future.

[Falcon]

Hey jldajio71, thanks for your reply. I really appreciate your views - glad we share a lot of them.

Sadly nowadays, among many young people even in college, genuine interest in knowledge is seen as nerdy or even freakish. If you're studying just for school so you can get a high-paying job one day, that would be "cool," but reading academic sources in your free time is really repulsive. To many non-American youths, however, doing so is highly respectable.

Do you also go to school in California, or another state?

[jldajio71]

Haha funny you mention reading academic sources on your free time because I actually work in the school's library and love to read journals, old text books, and encyclopedias while I'm supposed to be organizing the stacks. I do go to a school in Southern California. It's actually less than 20 minutes from Mexico. Glad to know there would be someone out there, even if their non-American, that would respect or appreciate the "nerdy" things I do for fun.

[wineguy]

Falcon, you've hit the nail right on the head. I go to Cal Poly and it's pretty much exactly as you've described it there. I tried to fit in my freshman year, and I did fit in more or less, but over time i couldn't live with myself acting like such a fool. I said f**k it and turned my back on the whole scene.

[Adama]

Great find. I don't think the sex ratio even matters. Most college campuses have more women than men. I can be surrounded entirely by women, but they would all have the same set of attitudes and habits. Many students either commute or go home on the weekends, leaving the campuses ghost towns during evenings, weekends, breaks, and summers. You should see UC Irvine on a weekend. It's so squeaky clean and devoid of people that it isn't even funny.

I went to Rutgers University in New Brunswick NJ. When I lived in the dorms, that is exactly what I experienced. They were all gone during the weekends. The only exception was if there was a really, really hot party scheduled, and that was probably only at the beginning of the semester.

[Falcon]

I can clearly recall during my informal high school dances, my friends and I would find it almost impossible to find a girl to dance with. They were all upper-middle class Asians and whites. They were incredibly mean and cliquish. It's absolutely no fun to be milling around for HOURS being completely ignored by them as you were simply trying to say hello. The high school girls would much choose to dance amongst themselves rather than with guys. Girls and guys are separated into separate circles, with the girls grinding among themselves and the guys showing off their breakdancing skills to each other.

It's completely different in rural Mexico. It's incredibly easy to find a girl to dance with in Mexican dances. Many will reject you, but they don't give you dirty looks and make you feel as if you've just committed a mortal sin. You simply move on to the next one and you'll most definitely find someone within half an hour. I usually find someone within minutes. Almost all the dancers are couples, rather than those same-sex circles in American dances where both genders are avoiding each other.

[Jester]

After about a year of trying to "click" with the SoCal girls and realizing I was getting nowhere, I took a trip to Mexico on a whim, just like you did, and have never looked back. All people in Southern California or any of the other border states should consider Mexico. Your post is spot on Falcon.

Thanks, I can't say how much it helps to be reminded.

[Jester]

Great OP, Falcon.

But you really got me with this:

MEXICAN GIRL: No computer. No Facebook. Not even an e-mail (we use text messaging instead). Just a simple cell phone. Listens to music on an old-fashioned boom box, since no one in her family has a fancy Apple gadget. We're back in the old days.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Many, though not all, have nasty social networking habits that cause horrible procrastination and irresponsibility. We'd be in the middle of a conversation, and they would have to pick up a phone call, text someone, or fiddle with their iWhatever. Plug on earbuds all the time so that no one can really talk to them.

Dream girl!

[Jester]

There is definitely a peculiar dating dynamic in LA that makes it very hard not only to date interesting women, but also meet people in general.

It's interesting how one can be in a setting surrounded by thousands of students all doing the same thing, but there being no connection or interest in students in socializing for the most part. There's definitely some voluntary segregation going on and way too cliquey and non-inclusive.

The overall vibe comes off as antisocial, shallow, and vacuous; people with no real substance or thoughts.

Still like High School in university, seems students here are immature and don't grow up like their peers around the world.

This article attempts to answer that :

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-ali-bi ... 79298.html

+1

[Robert77]

American women (not only the white ones, but also the many colored ones who are Americanized) are the bottom of the barrel.... it's a very funny pattern you see

*they're all angry with you because you're a man so somehow it's your fault that something has happened to them because you being a man makes you related to the issue they have.

*The worst mothers!!! I've never seen women more lazy, disgusting and disengaged with their children than American women, Is not uncommon to hear women saying (I cant wait til my son/daughter turns 18 so he can get the hell outta my house!!!) while mothers in Asia or latin america on the other hand are horrified by the prospect of their little one leaving the nest one day!!!

*Good luck finding an american woman that can cook, or that doesn't mind cleaning the house while you're working your ass off so you can provide for her!!! it's common to see the American male coming home from work exhausted and the children are dirty and crying, the house is a mess, there is no food anywhere because the bitch was busy shopping online!

*tendency to have serious mental issues!!!! I've travelled the world and never seen women more mentally unstable and full of baggage!!!

TO MAKE THINGS SHORT : ONLY A MORON WOULD MESS WITH AMERICAN WOMEN!!!!

[IraqVet2003]

So I'm an Asian-American college student in Southern California. My girlfriend is about my age and lives in rural Mexico.

Before that, when I would tell others how it's hard to find a romantic partner in college, they'd tell me, "Oh you're still young. You'll find someone here eventually." In my opinion, that's a dangerous assumption. Time flies by quickly, and I shouldn't have to spend one decade of my life to realize that the American dating scene is messed up. I'm in my early 20's and am already out of it.


So, the following list compares the two:
MEXICAN GIRL = my girlfriend in rural Mexico
AMERICAN GIRLS = American-raised girls in California universities

I've avoided exaggerations, and am doing my best at portraying a very realistic picture of rural Mexican life vs. American college life.

I can never meet a girl like this at an American university. She is astonishingly charming and considerate. Of course, not all Mexican girls will have her characteristics. But the point is, many of these girls exist in Latin America!

---------------------

MEXICAN GIRL: She would ask me every few days, "How are your parents doing?" I'd ask that back to her too.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Awkward question. Might answer, "Wait, WHAT?" and would think I'm crazy.

MEXICAN GIRL: I can tell her the silliest puns and jokes, and she would giggle non-stop.
AMERICAN GIRLS: "OMG that is sooo lame." The more tolerant ones would say, "Yeah, all right, cool." Obviously, they have an underappreciation for humor.

MEXICAN GIRL: I can talk to her about US-Mexico migration patterns/networks, like where people from certain parts of Mexico would tend to migrate. She'd be fascinated by all that and would say, "Wow! I never knew that before. Please tell me more!"
AMERICAN GIRLS: I'd sound like a boring guy working for the U.S. Census Bureau. Would also be "weird."

MEXICAN GIRL: She would enjoy listening to all sorts of international ethnic music that I'd play to her over the phone. Afterwards she'd say, "Ay, que bonito." (Oh, how beautiful.)
AMERICAN GIRLS: It would be very awkward if I start playing ethnic music on my cell phone to them. They would say, "You listen to THAT?" Some of the Asian-American girls would say, "That sounds sooo fobby." Hello, do you think that only good music consists of electric guitars and synthesized rap beats - American style?

MEXICAN GIRL: I would be able to talk about the Bible and religious traditions to her. I'd talk about religious demographics, read Bible passages, and so on. (Personally I do not have any specific religion. I am more of a universalist.)
AMERICAN GIRLS: Many are fundamentalist atheists who would hate to talk about religion. Some others are fundamentalist Protestants who wouldn't listen to my more moderate ideas, and would only say, "You should join our fellowship." Moderate Catholic girls like my Mexican girlfriend would be hard to find.

MEXICAN GIRL: She has never asked about the reputation or ranking of my school, which graduate school I'm going to, and how much money people in my major will be making after graduation. The simple fact that I am at least attending a university impresses her.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Of course, that would take up maybe half of our conversation time. Grades. Reputation of this and that. Getting a job. Ugh.

MEXICAN GIRL: She'd ask me, in tremendous detail, about what I like to cook and eat, and how I prepare the food. She would also sometimes cook dinner for her family. She would eat healthy tortillas, chicken dishes, pozole, tacos, and others.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Some of them would cook too. But many would just eat instant ramen and drink coffee. Maybe Red Bull or Monster so they can pull all-nighters after procrastinating on Facebook. They wouldn't bother to ask me any food/dining-related questions, except if it's related to "hanging out."

MEXICAN GIRL: Early to bed, early to rise, makes her healthy, wealthy, and wise. She always goes to bed at 11 pm or earlier, and wakes up at 6 or 7 am. In my experience, she's never stayed up past midnight doing things. Living in rural Mexico, the sun actually sets her biological clock.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Sleep when it's way past midnight, and come to class late. "Sleeping at 12 am? That's way too early!"

MEXICAN GIRL: Thinks going to school is a blessing, and loves learning. She's around 20, but is finishing up high school since she had to take some time off to work.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Complain about school incessantly. "Gosh, I have an essay due soon. This sucks, another midterm? OMG, I just want to get this over with." They're so fortunate, yet so ungrateful.

MEXICAN GIRL: Has a lot of friends at school as well, but most of the time when I call her, I'd hear her family members talking in the background. She's surrounded by family members, and deeply cares about them. She'd pass the phone onto her sisters and little nephews so they could say "hola" to me.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Surrounded by many superficial "friends," and maybe a few genuine ones. Family is out of the picture.

MEXICAN GIRL: We would be very honest with each other and talk about former ex's, dates, and crushes. In fact, that leads to a deep mutual understanding and trust. We know that we would likely not be cheating with those people if we're willing to talk about them. It's all seen as a normal part of what people do.
AMERICAN GIRLS: People here know that there's a rule of not talking about your ex's to American girls. They could start acting very angry and paranoid if you do. Drama, awkwardness, and what not.

MEXICAN GIRL: No computer. No Facebook. Not even an e-mail (we use text messaging instead). Just a simple cell phone. Listens to music on an old-fashioned boom box, since no one in her family has a fancy Apple gadget. We're back in the old days.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Many, though not all, have nasty social networking habits that cause horrible procrastination and irresponsibility. We'd be in the middle of a conversation, and they would have to pick up a phone call, text someone, or fiddle with their iWhatever. Plug on earbuds all the time so that no one can really talk to them.

My favorite:
MEXICAN GIRL: I can already see the good wife and mother in her. In fact, she's already treating me with a lot of motherly love by always telling me to stay safe, warm, not get sick, and to keep up my studies. She would even give me advice on not worrying about others around me and not stressing out too much.
AMERICAN GIRLS: "Let's go to the beach. Let's go clubbing. Let's go shopping." Let alone any sort of motherly love. I have never met an American girl my age who would actually act like a mother when I'm with her.

Great post!!! This is a good example of how most foreign women are better to be with than American/Westernized women.

[dancilley]

Great OP, Falcon.

But you really got me with this:

MEXICAN GIRL: No computer. No Facebook. Not even an e-mail (we use text messaging instead). Just a simple cell phone. Listens to music on an old-fashioned boom box, since no one in her family has a fancy Apple gadget. We're back in the old days.
AMERICAN GIRLS: Many, though not all, have nasty social networking habits that cause horrible procrastination and irresponsibility. We'd be in the middle of a conversation, and they would have to pick up a phone call, text someone, or fiddle with their iWhatever. Plug on earbuds all the time so that no one can really talk to them.

Dream girl!

We are noticing patterns. We are noticing that American females are stimulating their brains with certain stimulants that foreign females don't:

- Alcohol
- Weed
- Coffee (caffeine, refined sugar, cream, chocolate)
- Energy drinks (caffeine, refined sugar)
- Smartphone (YouTube, Tinder, Facebook, Instagram, texting, porn, etc.)
- Junk food (refined grains, refined sugar, oil)
- TV (cable, DSL, etc.)
- Psychiatric medication

So, it sounds like the Mexican people do not have access to all, or most, of the above stimulation.

This is the reason why the people are much more at ease and positive and friendly abroad...isn't it?

And you said for yourself that you don't watch TV, don't have a smartphone, etc., so that's why you are healthier, more at ease, etc., and not in harmony with the American people.

I think the above stimulation is exactly why American females are less vibrant, and more irritable.

I am about to permanently give up TV, the internet, cell phone, etc. for this reason. I have decided that they are undermining our health and happiness...our joy! We need to become aware of this and agree to stop the unhealthy stimulation and start living an active life...not passive! I have become super sedentary over the past 3 weeks...I am wasting my life...I am not following my dreams at all! I am procrastinating!

I flew to Maryland and was working for 5 weeks straight as a truck driver's helper and earned a lot of money...but for the past 3 weeks I have been eating ice cream, cookies, and have been lying in bed watching YouTube mostly.

In MD, I was also exercising at the hotel's gym, and was running to grocery stores and carrying multiple watermelons home and doing shoulder shrugs while walking! I was gaining muscle! But now, for the last 3 weeks, I have not exercised at all!

Technology and junk food and toxic substances are destroying people! We must become aware of this and put an end to it:

- No smartphone, maybe no phone at all
- Only whole plant foods diet
- No TV
- No computer
- One landline house phone
- Real people to talk to in person and interact with
- I guess listening to radio or music is ok, but playing music, dancing and singing is better
- Marriage, sexual activity, reproduction
- No alcohol
- No weed
- No illegal drugs
- No caffeine
- No refined sugar
- No oil
- No animal products if you feel totally strong and healthy without them
- No tattoos
- No piercings
- No foul language
- Dinner every single evening
- Physical activity, playing outside, barbecuing outside, etc.

What do you all think?

[MrMan]

We are noticing patterns. We are noticing that American females are stimulating their brains with certain stimulants that foreign females don't:

- Alcohol
- Weed
- Coffee (caffeine, refined sugar, cream, chocolate)
- Energy drinks (caffeine, refined sugar)
- Smartphone (YouTube, Tinder, Facebook, Instagram, texting, porn, etc.)
- Junk food (refined grains, refined sugar, oil)
- TV (cable, DSL, etc.)
- Psychiatric medication

It depends on where you go and the social class, culture, etc., but plenty of foreign girls use alcohol, and plenty of them watch TV and use smart phones. If you go to South Korea, the men may drink more, but plenty of women drink, too. Red Bull existed as Kratingdang in Thailand and Indonesia and probably a few other countries in the 1990's, but I don't remember seeing women drink them... or maybe anyone but one or two people and whoever advertises them. They came in a small bottle, not something you drink as an actual beverage while eating or at a restaurant or food stall. McDonalds and bakeries are popular in Asia. Coffee and tea are popular in various cultures around the world.

Asian women like to take pictures of their food with their phones before they eat them.

I don't think a little caffeine every now and then hurts most people. Too much is an issue. I might drink green tea or coffee if I am sleepy or as a social thing. I do not have to have a cup every morning to function. Dark chocolate is supposed to be good for you. Coffee is even supposed to have some health benefits, too.

I hated it when I came back to the US during iPod days on a college campus and you couldn't ask directions because young people were almost all wearing white earphones. I very rarely use earphones unless I am using a computer or something like that, or trying to listen to something off my computer I really need or want to hear to hear (an academic paper or a book or PDF) on the way to work. But I have not noticed Indonesians walking around with earphones. If they do that on the street, they might get run over. Traffic is just too wild for that. College campuses aren't that big, not the ones I've seen except for University of Indonesia. It's huge for Indonesia, but seemed a bit like a spread out US high school.

[MrMan]

I don't think I've ever seen a woman drink an energy drink in the US, either. Usually, it's men. Does anyone ever see that?

[MrMan]

This is what nearly all the American college girls here have in common, except for the new immigrants of course. If you don't have at least some of the following, you're simply not going to "click" with the other girls on campus, EVEN if you're very good-looking or have a great personality.

- Valley girl accent

I think you are overgeneralizing here. I haven't heard that except on TV shows set in California, that I recall, unless it's a dude who has the accent, which means he sounds gay.