How to detect the good ones (regardless of country)

[Johnny1975]

I'm wondering if there is a way to tell / detect if any given woman is worthy (not f***ed up by the western mindset or feminism - someone who will easily engage if she's interested, and not give a hard time, etc etc, basically someone normal). Is there a way to tell? What are the signs?

[Winston]

You know from her vibes, eyes which are the window to the soul, voice, actions, etc. You have to spend time with her and trust your gut instinct. Or at least watch what she does, how she acts, how considerate she is, etc.

This is common sense.

But it depends on your situation. You need to give more data or examples of what you are seeking.

Generally, good girls who are serious about you will:

- Be considerate of your needs and feelings.
- Treat you good.
- Care more about spending time with you and just being together, than what you do or where you go.
- Be happy to walk in the park with you to talk and get to know you.
- Not push you to give them money or gifts.
- Have the ability to feel shame.
- Will keep promises and commitments.
- Will respond to your messages in a timely manner, and if not, will apologize at least for the delay.
- Will be glad to cook for you.
- Will try to give you a massage if you are sore or have a headache.
- Will look happy around you, if she really likes you that is, not irritated or dissatisfied.

Another important thing to consider is compatibility and synergy.

Generally, if someone makes you feel stronger and more empowered, and adds to your personal energy, then they are compatible with you and your relationship will be mutually beneficial. But if they are emotionally draining, argumentative, and make you feel weaker or bad about yourself, then they are bad for you and will serve as nothing more than a parasite or energy vampire. You should eject them. This applies to both friendships and relationships. So you got to be selective in this area, based on whether there is synergy and beneficial energy in your relationship or not.

[Johnny1975]

Hey Winston. It feels weird (an honour) to be chatting to you. Why, you're the guy from all those videos.

I don't disagree with what you're saying, but I guess what I'm asking is, how do you instantly (or within a short time) tell if a girl is likely to have the necessary attributes that will lead to her likely being what you're just described. Much in the same way that a girl might be able to tell straight away if a guy has confidence. For example, she might sense inadequacy in a guy who shuffles around a lot, or that kind of thing. How do you tell, by body language, appearance / presentation, anything else, that a girl is a good (quality) one? Or indeed, not a good one.

Obviously you've had loads of experience with good quality girls, so I'm sure you've developed an instinct / knack for detecting the "goodness" straight away. What I'm asking is for you or someone to verbalise what that means in terms of what to look out for.

I'm asking so that I can have some general rules of thumb to tell me whether or not to even approach a woman in the first place. That way I can streamline my efforts.

[djfourmoney]

You don't have a good BS meter I guess. Maybe you should develop one. That said, you are less likely to run into Western Feminist nonsense overseas and you should be able to tell quickly. Constant talk of themselves in the sense of career should be a big red flag. Any woman when talking about children says things like they would like to stall having children for career/education. Women that are traditionally minded never put personal accomplishments ahead of having a family.

Those are your clues, talk, talk, talk and not about yourself, let her talk about herself.

[Rock]

You know from her vibes, eyes which are the window to the soul, voice, actions, etc. You have to spend time with her and trust your gut instinct. Or at least watch what she does, how she acts, how considerate she is, etc.

This is common sense.

But it depends on your situation. You need to give more data or examples of what you are seeking.

Generally, good girls who are serious about you will:

- Be considerate of your needs and feelings.
- Treat you good.
- Care more about spending time with you and just being together, than what you do or where you go.
- Be happy to walk in the park with you to talk and get to know you.
- Not push you to give them money or gifts.
- Have the ability to feel shame.
- Will keep promises and commitments.
- Will respond to your messages in a timely manner, and if not, will apologize at least for the delay.
- Will be glad to cook for you.
- Will try to give you a massage if you are sore or have a headache.
- Will look happy around you, if she really likes you that is, not irritated or dissatisfied.

Another important thing to consider is compatibility and synergy.

Generally, if someone makes you feel stronger and more empowered, and adds to your personal energy, then they are compatible with you and your relationship will be mutually beneficial. But if they are emotionally draining, argumentative, and make you feel weaker or bad about yourself, then they are bad for you and will serve as nothing more than a parasite or energy vampire. You should eject them. This applies to both friendships and relationships. So you got to be selective in this area, based on whether there is synergy and beneficial energy in your relationship or not.

Hmm, sounds just like Ling Ling.

[terminator]

I hate to burst your bubble, but there's no way to tell for sure. You won't know she's used you until your married and back in your country, and she's living in your house while you are in your mom's spare room.

[Winston]

Hey Winston. It feels weird (an honour) to be chatting to you. Why, you're the guy from all those videos.

I don't disagree with what you're saying, but I guess what I'm asking is, how do you instantly (or within a short time) tell if a girl is likely to have the necessary attributes that will lead to her likely being what you're just described. Much in the same way that a girl might be able to tell straight away if a guy has confidence. For example, she might sense inadequacy in a guy who shuffles around a lot, or that kind of thing. How do you tell, by body language, appearance / presentation, anything else, that a girl is a good (quality) one? Or indeed, not a good one.

Obviously you've had loads of experience with good quality girls, so I'm sure you've developed an instinct / knack for detecting the "goodness" straight away. What I'm asking is for you or someone to verbalise what that means in terms of what to look out for.

I'm asking so that I can have some general rules of thumb to tell me whether or not to even approach a woman in the first place. That way I can streamline my efforts.

Well I'm honored that you enjoyed my videos. Anyway, the list I wrote up above could be applied in a short time too, even on the first date. On the first meeting, you can immediately begin to watch for those signs I listed above. So they do apply.

Remember, actions speak louder than words.

I have experience with bad girls too. That's how I contrast them with the good. lol

Also, remember that a lot of communication is body language and subconscious. Your subconscious mind can pick up on subtle clues that your conscious mind doesn't. So try to focus on what your gut instinct is telling you too.

Girls with bad intentions don't usually have patience. If they want to scam you, they will do it within a short period of time. They don't have patience and do not like to waste time. Scammers with patience are more rare. lol

Hope that helps.

[Winston]

You know from her vibes, eyes which are the window to the soul, voice, actions, etc. You have to spend time with her and trust your gut instinct. Or at least watch what she does, how she acts, how considerate she is, etc.

This is common sense.

But it depends on your situation. You need to give more data or examples of what you are seeking.

Generally, good girls who are serious about you will:

- Be considerate of your needs and feelings.
- Treat you good.
- Care more about spending time with you and just being together, than what you do or where you go.
- Be happy to walk in the park with you to talk and get to know you.
- Not push you to give them money or gifts.
- Have the ability to feel shame.
- Will keep promises and commitments.
- Will respond to your messages in a timely manner, and if not, will apologize at least for the delay.
- Will be glad to cook for you.
- Will try to give you a massage if you are sore or have a headache.
- Will look happy around you, if she really likes you that is, not irritated or dissatisfied.

Another important thing to consider is compatibility and synergy.

Generally, if someone makes you feel stronger and more empowered, and adds to your personal energy, then they are compatible with you and your relationship will be mutually beneficial. But if they are emotionally draining, argumentative, and make you feel weaker or bad about yourself, then they are bad for you and will serve as nothing more than a parasite or energy vampire. You should eject them. This applies to both friendships and relationships. So you got to be selective in this area, based on whether there is synergy and beneficial energy in your relationship or not.

Hmm, sounds just like Ling Ling.

Yeah, if only she was at least 50 percent my type and didn't talk about useless mundane things over and over again on the phone. lol. If you enjoy that, you should call her and listen to her gripe about little things over and over again. lol

[Teal Lantern]

Hey Winston. It feels weird (an honour) to be chatting to you. Why, you're the guy from all those videos.

I don't disagree with what you're saying, but I guess what I'm asking is, how do you instantly (or within a short time) tell if a girl is likely to have the necessary attributes that will lead to her likely being what you're just described. Much in the same way that a girl might be able to tell straight away if a guy has confidence. For example, she might sense inadequacy in a guy who shuffles around a lot, or that kind of thing. How do you tell, by body language, appearance / presentation, anything else, that a girl is a good (quality) one? Or indeed, not a good one.

Obviously you've had loads of experience with good quality girls, so I'm sure you've developed an instinct / knack for detecting the "goodness" straight away. What I'm asking is for you or someone to verbalise what that means in terms of what to look out for.

I'm asking so that I can have some general rules of thumb to tell me whether or not to even approach a woman in the first place. That way I can streamline my efforts.

Keep in mind that what you're seeing is a snapshot in time. Many men have married a great woman who 10-15 years later had become a much different and unpleasant person.

My "rules" may be very different than others' (and yours), simply by experience and preferences.
A "no-go" girl for me may be just what you're looking for. You like 'em clean-cut? or tatted up like SuicideGirls?
IOW, the "rules" will be determined by what you want.

Rules for hookups <> rules for a LTR gf <> rules for a wife.

[xiongmao]

It takes time, so for this reason I recommend living in a foreign country for a few months. Get to know the girl.

Also take girls shopping, this soon separates the shopaholics from the more frugal ones.

And remember to get sick at some point, so you can see how she cares for you.

Actually only one of my Chinese ladies was a shopaholic. She was a "fashion lady" as they call them. Some men like these girls though (including me), but just bear in mind they're high maintenance.

[Johnny1975]

I think I'm ok at reading people, but I have a tendancy to want to see the best rather than the worst. But for years I've been getting better.

Where I work (volunteer) there's a woman who I've always considered polite, and generally nice, but there's something about her that I can't quite put my finger on. For example, if you say something humorous, she'll get it, but she won't laugh. Instead she'll acknowledge what you said but then go on and continue the conversation as if you didn't make a joke. I find that very odd.

And recently, we were having a conversation about marriage. I was saying that there's no benefit in it, and she (she's married) was saying that it can be nice to be married. Anyway as the conversation / lighthearted debate went on, she asked me if I've ever been in a long term you know what (I hate saying the word), and I knew that she was asking this as a way to say that I don't know what I'm talking about. She was very nice about it, but I could sense where she was going. So I basically asked her if that's where she's going with it, and then the conversation continued but I think I created a slightly negative vibe for her, although she remained polite.

The next time I saw her, she said that she's sorry if there was any misunderstanding or something like that, and then she apologised if she had offended me. She didn't offend me, and I said that I can't think of anything she said that offended me. Then she did something weird. She looked me right in the eye, with a smile, and said (in an "alright, alright, there's no need to be like that" kind of tone) "I'm only asking". Is it me or does that sound weird? Her reaction just doesn't fit what I said. I answered her question, I didn't say anything to warrant that response. In fact, she should have been glad to hear that there wasn't a problem. I think what happened was that she was trying to do the typical girly thing of creating a situation where everyone is lovey dovey again, the way girls make up (usually in a fake way, just to keep the peace), and I interrupted that process by pointing out that there wasn't a problem to begin with. The truth is that yes we had a disagreement, and a slightly negative vibe, maybe, just for a moment, but she was blowing it out of proportion. Males don't behave this way. We sort things out almost instantly, or ignore them if they're no big deal. In fact, we respect disagreements and welcome debates and can handle them. The more I think about it, the more I think that she isn't very good at human interactions, unless it's on her terms. I don't think she can handle disagreements. She has that vibe about her. Very friendly in general, and quite nice, but I can sense something else.

Another example (same woman) is yesterday, when I was talking to a guy there (we get along well despite barely knowing each other, and it's almost an entirely a female environment), I was saying that if there's nothing much for me to do, then I should maybe just go and come back another day. Suddenly she pops her head out of a backroom and says "what's that?" (like, what are you two talking about?) and, while I decide to say nothing, he tells her what we're talking about. I considered it quite rude for her to stick her nose in. I felt like she was asking because she was uncomfortable with 2 guys in a usually female environment getting friendly and chatty. It didn't seem genuine for her to ask.

Yet another example. Again, same woman. Some time ago, I popped in and asked where the manager was. I've been working there longer than anybody else by far, except the manager herself. Anyway she says she's at the back and I can wait until she comes back. How rude, I thought. She knows I've been working there much longer than her, and instead of saying yeah she's at the back, go ahead and talk to her if that's what you want, she asks me to wait. I would never do that.



So yes I'm quite good at noticing things, although I don't always know what it is that I'm noticing, but I know that it's odd.

I've been thinking lately that from now on, I'll never ask for a girl's number. Instead, I'll give her mine. That way, if I was to call, and she doesn't pick up, I don't have to wonder why. It may seem like having a number puts you in control, but really it doesn't. It's better to give her yours, then forget about it, and if she calls, it's a nice surprise, plus you'll know that she's interested, and you'll also know that she's the type to do her bit. And if she doesn't, there's nothing you can do, so there's nothing to think about, and it's easy to move on. So I think I'll use this as a test.

Same goes for first meeting. I think it should be 1 hour (just drinks, no sex), then part company. If she's genuinely interested, she want to meet again, then there can be sex, and then it will most likely be better anyway as she'll already be comfortable (having already met). I think I'll use that as a test too.

[NorthAmericanguy]

I'm wondering if there is a way to tell / detect if any given woman is worthy (not f***ed up by the western mindset or feminism - someone who will easily engage if she's interested, and not give a hard time, etc etc, basically someone normal). Is there a way to tell? What are the signs?

I agree with Cornfed and Terminator, in that, there is no way to tell if a woman is good or not. See, the list that Winston posted is good, but you have to realize that a woman could simply be behaving that way (acting) just to get something out of you, and once she gets what she wants from you, she will either change for the worse, or just leave you.

It happened to a buddy of mine, he was with his wife for many years and she was the supporting woman that she should have been as told to me. Well, after she got 2 kids, the big house, and saw that her husbands business was at the top, she started cheating with an x-bf and then subsequently filed for divorced and cleaned out my friend. My friend went from being close to a millionaire to now living alone and facing jail time if he gets behind in child support. My buddy did NOTHING wrong and he was a top notch father/husband. He simply got scammed.

Another story I saw online where a Western man met a Thai woman in Thailand and was with her for many years. Story short, he thought he could trust the woman and they went into a business deal to buy property and what she did was clean out his bank account and took off for good.


So you have to look at women from another perspective:

1.) Figure out why a woman really wants to be with you. What does she get out of being with you. Why did she chose you?

2.) Never trust a woman (save for your mom/sister). Never.

3.) Protect yourself by knowing the laws in your country. For example, if you cohabitate with a woman, will over a certain time that be considered a de facto marriage?


Bagkokstickman talks about it in this post:

The Rosetta Stone of Women’s Behavior

http://www.stickmanweekly.com/ReadersSu ... er5546.htm




Tariq Nasheed talks about it as well in this short show:

3rd Eye Of Game

[Johnny1975]

Thanks for that link, I'll check it out.

I think there's too much negativity here. The negativity is justified but there's not enough emphasis on solutions (apart from going to another country - which is good, but not all of us can do that). I've always been of the opinion that there's usually a solution to everything. There's always a way to figure something out, it just takes some thinking.

I believe that you can tell if a woman is good or not. They're not that mysterious, the only thing that makes it seem that way is the male sex drive (p***y has no power, by the way, it's the manipulation of the male sex drive that does it). There's always a way to tell, and there's always something you can do as a test. You have to be clever, and make the tests as harsh as necessary. One test won't do it, you have to test her many times for different things (qualities, attributes, traits).

For example, I'd never have sex with a girl without a condom unless I was as close to 100% as possible in knowing that I wasn't going to get her pregnant. This means that I would go with her to the chemist and buy a box of pills (the pill, whatever the official name is), and I'd read the instructions, get her to read them, and show me that she understands them, and then I'd take some and keep them at home, I'd also keep some with me at all times (in my wallet), I'd get her to keep some with her at all times (and I'd ask her to show me that she still has them from time to time), and some at her place (which I'd also want to check). So there would be no reason ever to say that there's none available. Then, whenever she needs to take one, I'd need to watch her take it. Then, I'd get her a pregnancy testing kit (and one for me to keep at home for her) and get her to do that any time I ask her to, just to be on the super safe side. The test would be if she's completely ok with all of that (as opposed to saying "what, don't you trust me?" - that would be a fail).

A test like that would tell me a lot about her.

If you make a list of the top 10 qualities that you want in a girl, I'm sure intelligent minds can devise ways to test for those qualities, and ways of detecting their presence or absence. I don't know why the general opinion seems to be that you can't tell or test. Of course you can.

[Teal Lantern]

Thanks for that link, I'll check it out.

I think there's too much negativity here. The negativity is justified but there's not enough emphasis on solutions (apart from going to another country - which is good, but not all of us can do that). I've always been of the opinion that there's usually a solution to everything. There's always a way to figure something out, it just takes some thinking.
You may find what you're looking for in the USA, but first, you're going to need to be very clear on what you're looking for.

I believe that you can tell if a woman is good or not.
"Good" for how long? Looking for a different girl every month or one girl to keep for the next ten years? The screening processes are very different.

They're not that mysterious, the only thing that makes it seem that way is the male sex drive (p***y has no power, by the way, it's the manipulation of the male sex drive that does it).
The "only" thing? If you're sure of this, then it's just a matter of getting your male sex drive under control, right?

There's always a way to tell, and there's always something you can do as a test. You have to be clever, and make the tests as harsh as necessary. One test won't do it, you have to test her many times for different things (qualities, attributes, traits).
You'll have to be very clever to get her to stick around for these "harsh" tests. More likely, she'll quickly move on to other guys.

For example, I'd never have sex with a girl without a condom unless I was as close to 100% as possible in knowing that I wasn't going to get her pregnant.
Then why isn't the word "vasectomy" anywhere in your post?

This means that I would go with her to the chemist and buy a box of pills (the pill, whatever the official name is), and I'd read the instructions, get her to read them, and show me that she understands them, and then I'd take some and keep them at home, I'd also keep some with me at all times (in my wallet), I'd get her to keep some with her at all times (and I'd ask her to show me that she still has them from time to time), and some at her place (which I'd also want to check). So there would be no reason ever to say that there's none available. Then, whenever she needs to take one, I'd need to watch her take it.
Lots of fathers have done the same thing.
Birth control pills aren't like aspirin. "Whenever she needs to take one" is every day (starting several days before having sex without a condom), and you aren't going to always be there to watch that pill be taken.

Then, I'd get her a pregnancy testing kit (and one for me to keep at home for her) and get her to do that any time I ask her to, just to be on the super safe side. The test would be if she's completely ok with all of that (as opposed to saying "what, don't you trust me?" - that would be a fail).
The super safe side of what, exactly, if the test says she's pregnant?

A test like that would tell me a lot about her.
It tells her quite a bit about you, too.

If you make a list of the top 10 qualities that you want in a girl, I'm sure intelligent minds can devise ways to test for those qualities, and ways of detecting their presence or absence. I don't know why the general opinion seems to be that you can't tell or test. Of course you can.
Some qualities are easier to test for than others. Also, there is the matter of personal intentions. A woman who wants to scam you but thinks I'm not worth trying to scam is going to treat you differently than she does me -- you will be treated much better in the beginning and much worse in the end.

[Johnny1975]

You've missed the point on a lot of what I've said. Actually, practically all of it. I'm hoping that this tendency isn't the norm on this forum. Surely there must be quite a few people around here who understand what I'm getting at.